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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:21:09 AM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Hey man... I think you should just talk with her about it. Sit her down, and put it to her just like you laid it out in the thread - which you did a good job doing. I think that until you do this, everything else is just speculation. I'd just say to her: "Hey.. I wanted to talk a little about where we're at in our relationship. I've noticed some changes lately, and I'm not sure how to read them. So I thought I'd talk with you about them." Despite being married for 30+ years, from time to time, my wife and I have to sit down and get on the same page. I think some folks are either afraid or unable to do something as simple as talk. It's really the simplest way to figure things out. Hopefully she'll be truthful with you. You'll know whether or not she is. If she's not, then what's the point? Why be in a relationship of lies? I wish you the best, and hope things work out for you.  |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:23:06 AM EDT
[#2]
Quoted:
I've been dating a woman for 5 months now and she makes me feel lately like I'm an inconvenience, Can't get her to answer the phone ,takes hours to get a reply to a text not just a hey,what are you doing but ones where she makes plans and if we're doing them or not .it's like pulling teeth.. And whenever we are supposed to meet up she always get's tired and cuts it short. I really like her and she tells me she loves me but it doesn't feel like it. There's more and this has no bearing whether I stay or go,she had her thyroid taken out from cancer so she get's sick pretty often and I assume that is making her tired too? Wasn't at all like this till about 2 weeks ago ,I know she isn't talking/seeing anyone else,so that isn't a worry. Really hitting a cross roads type thing with this,Do I have a legitimate gripe or am I just being a bitch? Not a chance I'm posting pics Back off. see what happens put the turd in her lap. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:25:10 AM EDT
[#3]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Yeah,I don't think so Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Time to rent a car and start following her. Install a GPS tracker on her car. Surveil her house and work place. Install key stroke tracking software on her computer. "Borrow" her phone when she isn't expecting it. Time to get serious, op. Stop pussyfooting around here. I was literally just in PHX two days ago. Where ya at? I'll come do for you. We must get to the bottom of this mystery. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:26:51 AM EDT
[#4]
Yes .. Eject .. trust your gut .. Run like a scared white tale.. and watch out for 6 oclock rustlers
She is probably cheating on you ... |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:28:44 AM EDT
[#5]
I'd walk. No reason to waste time when there's plenty of others out there.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:29:09 AM EDT
[#6]
Arrange a threesome?
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:32:34 AM EDT
[#7]
Sounds like she is going through, or has gone through, a life changing event.
Give her the space she needs and if she doesn't come around then you had some fun while it lasted and learned something about caring about somebody outside of physical pleasure. You don't have to admit it so I will say it for you. You are actually in love with her, have you told her yet ? 
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:38:01 AM EDT
[#8]
Time to go.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:41:47 AM EDT
[#9]
As a guy who has dated a girl with a missing thyroid and para thyroid for 4 years now.... E FUCKING JECT..... Your talking about bipolar squared.. If the meds are not right, holy fuck mood swings, night sweats, horny, angry, never horny, grumpy, tired, forgetful, angry, happy, angry, never horny, angry.. angry always angry... Then she gets her period......
 I have to leave, or things get destroyed.. Everyday I wake up with a new person, and a new set of rules.. But I love her, and it keeps me entertained.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 1:57:00 AM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted: TLDR Only saw the title of this thread. Any time you have to ask, the answer is YES! |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:00:00 AM EDT
[#11]
It probably ain't gonna get any better. Why stay around?
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:08:40 AM EDT
[#12]
Quoted: There's more and this has no bearing whether I stay or go,she had her thyroid taken out from cancer so she get's sick pretty often and I assume that is making her tired too? Wasn't at all like this till about 2 weeks ago ,I know she isn't talking/seeing anyone else,so that isn't a worry. She on meds for this part? If not she needs to be. Like yesterday. Major hormone issues otherwise. And yes being sick and tired can easily result from it. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:11:37 AM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Five months is long enough to figure out if it is working or not. Evidently it isn't. This. Thyroid problems or not. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:19:39 AM EDT
[#14]
Thyroid will do that. If that was not involved then eject, but the thyroid issue changes everything. Believe her. Two of my friends had cancer there, never the same again.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:23:49 AM EDT
[#15]
how exactly do you KNOW that she isn't fooling around? If she's sucking dick in a restroom stall at work, how would you know? You have people following her 24/7 or...?
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:38:40 AM EDT
[#16]
no pics, don't care
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:43:14 AM EDT
[#17]
She is probably looking for someone with a horse head mask and black socks
 
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:46:37 AM EDT
[#18]
Quote HistoryQuote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
you should probably talk to her about it first. a simple "this is not OK with me--what's going on?" can work wonders. https://totakesometime.files.wordpress.com/2012/10/200891941.jpg 
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:48:12 AM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Sounds to me like you are being replaced, but she's still keeping her options open. Either that, or you are the clingy type. This. Been there, done that, never knew she was shopping while we were dating. That's usually what it is. She thinks she can do better, but rather than breaking it off, she shops for a new man while in a relationship. It's anyone's guess if she cheats or not. You won't find out about that until many months later. Facebook is good for something.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 2:50:36 AM EDT
[#20]
I had a woman do something similar to me.
Turns out she was playing "hide the sausage" with another guy. Your girlfriend may be genuinely tired. I think I'd give her the benefit of the doubt and talk to her about it. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:01:59 AM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She's checked out and doesn't respect you, eject |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:05:35 AM EDT
[#22]
She is using you for sex and or until something better comes along.
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:08:21 AM EDT
[#23]
LEARN when to pull it. It's all a part of growing. Aloha, Mark |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:18:47 AM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I did ,Also asked her if I should move on down the road and she said no Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
you should probably talk to her about it first. a simple "this is not OK with me--what's going on?" can work wonders. You dont ask women what your plan is. Thats your job. Youre the shot caller. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:26:26 AM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This. Been there, done that, never knew she was shopping while we were dating. That's usually what it is. She thinks she can do better, but rather than breaking it off, she shops for a new man while in a relationship. It's anyone's guess if she cheats or not. You won't find out about that until many months later. Facebook is good for something. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Sounds to me like you are being replaced, but she's still keeping her options open. Either that, or you are the clingy type. This. Been there, done that, never knew she was shopping while we were dating. That's usually what it is. She thinks she can do better, but rather than breaking it off, she shops for a new man while in a relationship. It's anyone's guess if she cheats or not. You won't find out about that until many months later. Facebook is good for something. Dude you don't sell the old model until you've decide on the new one. If you walk long enough a Pinto seems like a good deal. 
Seriously though I'd bet it's the thyroid issue. Getting that squared away can take some time. Good luck no matter which way it goes. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:31:05 AM EDT
[#26]
Eject
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:33:22 AM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
May as well. She already has. This. And it's called 'dating' for a reason. Compatibility isn't there, move on to the next one. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 3:57:55 AM EDT
[#28]
Like the smart ones have said, let her come to you. Guys seriously need to learn the hot/ cold effect and when to use a little jealousy as a tool. If not you'll be boring. If she's being bad, like described flat out ignore to a point, be disinterested. Either she will chase you or move on. If she's on the fence, this will help get her off of it.
Long time ago this girl always said guys she met were too clingy, stalkerish etc.. I could tell why, she was doing basically this against them. When guys would be for her she'd get bored? Don't know the full details, but she couldn't forever figure out a guy who did the same shit to her. Why doesn't he ever call, make time, visit, too tired.. Then he'd ramp her up and drop her again. She would get so mad and chase him even more. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:03:37 AM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I did ,Also asked her if I should move on down the road and she said no Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
you should probably talk to her about it first. a simple "this is not OK with me--what's going on?" can work wonders. There is your answer. She already said no to ejecting. Having low thyroid hormone, or in this case no thyroid hormone, is a bitch at first. It takes time to get the meds right. Give her time, it will get better. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:23:46 AM EDT
[#30]
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me.
30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:26:25 AM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Eject. She's no longer interested in you. Ding Ding Ding |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:30:08 AM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. Not bad. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:32:06 AM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Not bad. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. Not bad. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:43:35 AM EDT
[#34]
TL;DR;F5/eject
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Posted: 2/7/2016 4:43:59 AM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. Is this normal for your relationship? Like why did she have to leave? It would possibly help if you gave your rough ages. If I were you, the first thing I would do is the next time you see her in person, sit down and say hey this is and this is going on and I just want to make sure we are on the same page. After that, if she says y'all are good to go, see if it changes. If it does great. If it doesn't, start not calling and seeing her. After a few days she will ask what is going on. Just tell her you thought we were going to be on the same page but it isn't happening. The ball will be totally in her court. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 5:05:12 AM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted: She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. JK I went back and read. This thread has my attention. OK, so do we assume she will come back with clean laundry of is she a clepto and/or has a thing with your funky skid marked tighty whities? As a married man of the past 13 years and two more kids, I've never had your experience. In fact it's great. Yeah the last minute nookie and domestic subordinance says "hand on hun, I'm working on some issues and haven't forgotten you". She may have bought some time. So you might want to try the "let's have a talk" deal as previously suggested. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 5:06:51 AM EDT
[#37]
Before you dump her voice your beefs and give her a chance to correct.
She might have some beefs with you you might have to correct. I've been dumped where she laid out all the problems about how awful I was. She didn't tell me how displeased she was until AFTER she dumped me! |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 5:41:09 AM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. What, no sammich? |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 6:26:52 AM EDT
[#39]
At 5 months in it shouldn't be this way. Should still be plenty of fire. Tell her you want take a break and see what she says.
ETA: The cancer thing is a wild card. She deserves some slack for that |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 6:45:11 AM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. Keep her. Good woman |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 6:46:51 AM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Sounds like she already did. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 6:53:54 AM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Nope. I act very different in real life than I do here Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: do you act like you do on ARF, when you are around her? I act very different in real life than I do here |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:24:45 AM EDT
[#43]
If you have to ask.............
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:41:27 AM EDT
[#44]
My ex, after 18 years together, got to where she was treating me the same way but insisted she loved me and didn't want to break up. When I finally got fed up with trying after about a year and told her I couldn't stay in our relationship like it was any longer, that's when she admitted to fucking around the whole time and begged me to stay.
Sorry, but I can't jump on the thyroid bandwagon when this is exactly the kind of behavior most women exhibit when they've been fucking around. eta: Maybe she ain't fucking around. But regardless, it seems she's just not all that into you anymore. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:44:53 AM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I didn't get to cuddle Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
She came over ,put on some music and had sex with me. 30 mins later she grabbed my dirty laundry and split. Not bad. That bothers you stop pretending it doesn't. It should bother you. Anyone can get laid. You don't seem like a priority. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:45:57 AM EDT
[#46]
Quoted: I've been dating a woman for 5 months now and she makes me feel lately like I'm an inconvenience, Can't get her to answer the phone ,takes hours to get a reply to a text not just a hey,what are you doing but ones where she makes plans and if we're doing them or not .it's like pulling teeth.. And whenever we are supposed to meet up she always get's tired and cuts it short. I really like her and she tells me she loves me but it doesn't feel like it. There's more and this has no bearing whether I stay or go,she had her thyroid taken out from cancer so she get's sick pretty often and I assume that is making her tired too? Wasn't at all like this till about 2 weeks ago ,I know she isn't talking/seeing anyone else,so that isn't a worry. Really hitting a cross roads type thing with this,Do I have a legitimate gripe or am I just being a bitch? Not a chance I'm posting pics Have you talked to her about it? Asked her what is going on? Is taking the laundry a good thing or a bad thing? Has she ever done this before? In my dating days, I would have allowed it, for no other reason than curiosity. Is she going to do the laundry? Steal it? Fuck with it? Use it to prolong the relationship? Will you ever get it back Is your laundry now being held hostage? Were your favorite clothes in there, or just socks and undershirts? So many questions. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:46:36 AM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Time to rent a car and start following her. Install a GPS tracker on her car...... You laugh but there's at least one meber here who sees no problem with it. He's posted numerous times about the GPS tracker he put in his wife's car. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:48:33 AM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
there. Done. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
TLDR Only saw the title of this thread. Any time you have to ask, the answer is YES! "Whenever there is any doubt, there is no doubt" |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:49:51 AM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Nope,seems once 8pm rolls around she's nodding off And her friend's kids get's her sick all the time Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: you should probably talk to her about it first. a simple "this is not OK with me--what's going on?" can work wonders. She gets sick pretty often. Is she still getting cancer treatments or taking drugs for the cancer? Nothing I can do about it, that's what my body decided to do. She might be just getting older. Also, don't rule out depression as the problem until you can. |
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Posted: 2/7/2016 7:54:41 AM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
She may need a dosage adjustment. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
is she on something for her now lost tyroid? I know before I was on my meds I was tired all the time and very forgetful. If that is stable move on. She may need a dosage adjustment. it's most likely this thyroids they're kind of a big deal! threads like this show how most have no clue about surviving cancer. If she had this surgery within the last year it can take that long for just the endocrinologist to dial in her right mg of medication. Look at her bottle it's probably somewhere between 100 - 130 you will be surprised how much just a little adjustment will effect her whole day. The number represents the amount of energy she has for that day and when it's gone they crash pretty quick. What a cancer survivor needs is not someone who asks questions, they need someone that gets shit done. step up or step off OP you might not be the guy for her. |
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