So...... the GF is pissed I look at pr0n.... - Page 2

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - So...... the GF is pissed I look at pr0n.... (Page 2 of 4)

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:11:11 PM EDT

[#1]

just b/c i want to own page 2

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:13:06 PM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:
What better to walk home to after a hard day of work than a note on the computer reading "Next time, delete the history"

Some backstory: I have a live-in GF, very nice girl, introduced her to shootign and got her hooked (even lurks here on arfcom, but not in GD so I'm unconcerned

How do you know she doesn't look at GD? She sounds damn nosey, so I wouldn't count on it.

Everybody has a right to some privacy. If you were leaving pr0n laying around in plain view, she has a legitimate beef. But the history on your pc is none of her damn business.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:13:53 PM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:
it's not like I'm checking out donkey rape bukakke porn

FAIL

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:16:36 PM EDT

[#4]

Leave a note on the computer for he rto find that reads : Next time, put out!

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:17:20 PM EDT

[#5]

I agree you could enjoy it together if you like it individually.. If she's not willing to explore that with you, then she's not the one for you..
Comprise, and make your OWN porn, if she's not comfortable with you looking at other women..

Yes, this is the voice of experience..

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:19:59 PM EDT

[#6]

Quoted:

What better to walk home to after a hard day of work than a note on the computer reading "Next time, delete the history"

Some backstory: I have a live-in GF, very nice girl, introduced her to shootign and got her hooked (even lurks here on arfcom, but not in GD so I'm unconcerned), we've been seeing each other for 3+ years. We both work, and sometimes our schedules don't allow 'extracirricular' activities every day. Such is life. Most days I leave for work early in the morning before her, so she's asleep when I leave, and has several hours to herself before her shift. She's part-time, so I'm almost always home before her in the afternoon.

So yesterday is a decent enough day for the weekend, we went out for a night on the town, saw a show and ate at a nice pub for dinner. We're having a good time, I'm feelin' frisky, but she is dead tired. Out like a light.

"Hmm well ok babe, why don't you lay down?" She passes out on the bed. So now what do I do? "Lets check the interweb to kill some time" I find a hilarious site whose content is, how shall we saw, NSFW. Think 'do the carpets match the curtains?: the game' As the night goes on my mind starts to wander, so I start perusing the seedy underbelly of the internet. It get's late and I go to sleep.

This morning, things are normal as can be. Get up, GF is still asleep, go to work. I come home, GF is apparently working a bit later than usual. OK, no problem. I and go to use the computer & relax a bit, check GD for some shits& giggles.

"

WTF is this?"

I discover the aforementioned note. Beneath it, she has opened up all the sites I peeped last night in the web browser. In an attempt to shame me? I'm not quite sure.

The kicker here for me is, I know she looks at internet porn too. We're both young, and have normal urges, so I don't even worry about it. If i get home from work, and find some naughty websites in the internet history, I just chuckle to myself (plus it usually means she's feeling into it, so bonus for me

). It's never looking at any weird shit (her or me) so it's not like I'm checking out donkey rape bukakke porn or something utterly vile, we're still in love and respect each other, so what's the harm?

She'll be home soon, and probably won't make dinner tonight

So, I wonder, how should I handle this situation when she gets back? Ignore it? call her on a double-standard? I try not to be confrontational about shit like this. But she felt the need to call me out on this instance instead of letting it slide, like I would have were the situations reversed.

What say ye?

Sir, "Guess Her Muff" is the pinnacle of Western Civilization, and if your SO can't realize that, it may be time to pull the cable...and eject-ulate

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:24:51 PM EDT

[#7]

Lay her down by the fire and make SWEET LOVE

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:28:54 PM EDT

[#8]

I would not stay with someone who checks up on what I do by browsing internet history. Nor would I stay with someone who tells me to delete my internet history because I looked at porn.

If anything you should just type in a bunch of beastiality sites and leave them at the top of the history. Then don't say a word.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:29:11 PM EDT

[#9]

tell her to take care of "it" or stfu about porn.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:29:13 PM EDT

[#10]

You guys need to have a talk. About boundaries, both hers and yours.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:34:31 PM EDT

[#11]

The only advise I have for you is to not seek relationship advise here.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:35:23 PM EDT

[#12]

well, you were horny, she was tired. you jerked off to some porn, because she didnt want to attend to your needs.

wheres the problem? if she tries anything, dont let her pull a tarp over your head!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:38:36 PM EDT

[#13]

PICS, otherwise we cant really say.

am I really the first to ask for pics?

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:38:50 PM EDT

[#14]

Update:

She's back, and avoiding me. Hasn't said a word in about 15 minutes.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:40:20 PM EDT

[#15]

Keep looking.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:41:05 PM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:
Update:

She's back, and avoiding me. Hasn't said a word in about 15 minutes.

Maybe strip naked and fap to her instead of porn. You are guaranteed to spook the shit out of her

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:41:39 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
The only advise I have for you is to not seek relationship advise here.

Fucker, you just divided by zero!

TRG

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:42:31 PM EDT

[#18]

Quoted:
Stop looking.

Call her hypocrisy.

Fuck like animals.

FTMFW!

Speaking from experience this is the best course of action, Dark Charisma wins this thread.

ETA: To me she is just asking you to stop something that bothers her, whether it be looking at porn or leaving your dirty underwear under her pillow. Talk about it, discuss pro's and cons, then come to a solution that pleases both of you. Thats why it is called a relationship. Dismiss all doubt in her mind that you are looking at porn because you find her undesireable. It is like an arfcommers wife who does not like him having alot of guns until he sits her down and articulates why he has them and why he enjoys them. Replace the guns with pron and its you.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:43:16 PM EDT

[#19]

Stop having sex with her that will teach her.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:44:48 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:

Quoted:

Update:

She's back, and avoiding me. Hasn't said a word in about 15 minutes.

Maybe strip naked and fap to her instead of porn. You are guaranteed to spook the shit out of her

LMAO

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:44:58 PM EDT

[#21]

Tell her Rick called...then ask her who the fk is Rick.

OR...tell her Rick called, but didn't leave a number or message, and leave it at that. Act like your not concerend or thinking about it. She will spend a half an hour trying to figure out who Rick is, and by that time, you could have had a couple of beers and she will spend the rest of the night trying to put your mind at ease without saying a word about Rick.

No charge

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:45:39 PM EDT

[#22]

Freudian man.... Freudian.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:45:55 PM EDT

[#23]

Pull up some of her web sites and enjoy them together.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:46:56 PM EDT

[#24]

clean the jizz off the3 monitor and the hand lotion off the mouse and next time she might not be so mad.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:48:42 PM EDT

[#25]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

No, there are thousands of divorces happening in America because people get married without knowing all of the pertinent information about their future spouse. Porn isn't the problem, people who never should have married in the first place are.

Yes, it is...I have counseled too many husbands and wives when this subject comes up threatening the marriage. Sometimes ending it.

Make all the excuses pointing to other troubles...this is a root. Period. I do this for living, do not mess with me.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:49:17 PM EDT

[#26]

Quoted:

Quoted:
What better to walk home to after a hard day of work than a note on the computer reading "Next time, delete the history"

Some backstory: I have a live-in GF, very nice girl, introduced her to shootign and got her hooked (even lurks here on arfcom, but not in GD so I'm unconcerned), we've been seeing each other for 3+ years. We both work, and sometimes our schedules don't allow 'extracirricular' activities every day. Such is life. Most days I leave for work early in the morning before her, so she's asleep when I leave, and has several hours to herself before her shift. She's part-time, so I'm almost always home before her in the afternoon.

So yesterday is a decent enough day for the weekend, we went out for a night on the town, saw a show and ate at a nice pub for dinner. We're having a good time, I'm feelin' frisky, but she is dead tired. Out like a light.

"Hmm well ok babe, why don't you lay down?" She passes out on the bed. So now what do I do? "Lets check the interweb to kill some time" I find a hilarious site whose content is, how shall we saw, NSFW. Think 'do the carpets match the curtains?: the game' As the night goes on my mind starts to wander, so I start perusing the seedy underbelly of the internet. It get's late and I go to sleep.

This morning, things are normal as can be. Get up, GF is still asleep, go to work. I come home, GF is apparently working a bit later than usual. OK, no problem. I and go to use the computer & relax a bit, check GD for some shits& giggles.
"

WTF is this?"
I discover the aforementioned note. Beneath it, she has opened up all the sites I peeped last night in the web browser. In an attempt to shame me? I'm not quite sure.

The kicker here for me is, I know she looks at internet porn too. We're both young, and have normal urges, so I don't even worry about it. If i get home from work, and find some naughty websites in the internet history, I just chuckle to myself (plus it usually means she's feeling into it, so bonus for me

). It's never looking at any weird shit (her or me) so it's not like I'm checking out donkey rape bukakke porn or something utterly vile, we're still in love and respect each other, so what's the harm?

She'll be home soon, and probably won't make dinner tonight

So, I wonder, how should I handle this situation when she gets back? Ignore it? call her on a double-standard? I try not to be confrontational about shit like this. But she felt the need to call me out on this instance instead of letting it slide, like I would have were the situations reversed.

What say ye?

Sir, "Guess Her Muff" is the pinnacle of Western Civilization, and if your SO can't realize that, it may be time to pull the cable...and eject-ulate

Best. Website. Ever.

I say you add it to the list of things that you don't like about her, but don't want to do anything about and isn't a big enough deal to move out. As you continue your relationship, the list gets longer. The list continues to grow until you notice she's not cooking as much as she used to be, doesn't dress up as much as she used to, and is overall a cold person to you. Then she gets a cat, and that keeps her happy for a while. Then you notice she spends more time talking to the cat, then she does to you. You walk in the door after a long day at work at a job you can't stand but stay at because it pays the bills. The second you walk in the door, the cat comes out from underneath the couch and guess which one she says hi to first? It's not you big guy. It's not you.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:49:18 PM EDT

[#27]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

Rather ironic response given your screen name, wouldn't you say?

Yup..but it has nothing to with pron.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:49:28 PM EDT

[#28]

call her on double standard....but don't expect your logical argument to make a dent.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:50:17 PM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:
confront her about it and tell her what you told us.

exactly

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:51:08 PM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Stop.

Screw that.

Find someone who isn't so fucking insecure about themselves.

Seriously though.

I know, right?

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:53:15 PM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

The porn isn't the problem. As in this situation the OP says he was denied that is something physical that has both physical and mental aspects that need to be dealt with. Porn didn't cause it, porn didn't make it work, if anything porn brought a calm solution to mix. I guess he could have beat woman and forced her to have sex... or would porn have been the cause of that too?

If his partner would have made sure she had taken care of his needs, instead of just focusing on herself, this situation never would have happend. A selfish partner is a bigger cause of divorce than pictures ever could be.

Wrong..you guys really have no clue on this subject matter.

I deal with couples on a weekly basis with this being the number 2 problem that causes divorce (finances #1)...I have an on staff Dr. who I send the other marital problems to. Porn is a huge problem, make no mistake, make no excuses..it is an elephant sitting in the room. Ask your wives, if they it's no problem, ask someone elses wife..it will eventually become a landslide of information for you.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:53:48 PM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

No, there are thousands of divorces happening in America because people get married without knowing all of the pertinent information about their future spouse. Porn isn't the problem, people who never should have married in the first place are.

Yes, it is...I have counseled too many husbands and wives when this subject comes up threatening the marriage. Sometimes ending it.

Make all the excuses pointing to other troubles...this is a root. Period. I do this for living, do not mess with me.

Hiding porn is a cause, and people not being honest is an effect?

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:54:17 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

So is Black Rifle Disease.

Is anyone going to give that up?

No! Buy more mags to keep your attention off the BRD (Black rifle disease).

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:54:29 PM EDT

[#34]

watch it with her.

you'll get ideas, and its an easy way to introduce shit you wanna do without sounding like a perverted jerkoff.

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:56:52 PM EDT

[#35]

She will find all the money you spent on BRD

PS. I never suggest eject thing; everyone is digging his own grave

Posted: 6/15/2009 2:59:54 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

No, there are thousands of divorces happening in America because people get married without knowing all of the pertinent information about their future spouse. Porn isn't the problem, people who never should have married in the first place are.

Yes, it is...I have counseled too many husbands and wives when this subject comes up threatening the marriage. Sometimes ending it.

Make all the excuses pointing to other troubles...this is a root. Period. I do this for living, do not mess with me.

Hiding porn is a cause, and people not being honest is an effect?

No...porn itself hurts couples.

It makes women feel inadequate and takes a husband's mind off of her and on the silicone babe doing God knows what in front of a camera. It is not real..it is fantasy..live in a fantasy world long enough, you will lose reality. This is where you are supposed to live.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:00:00 PM EDT

[#37]

You should be banging her right now! That'll teach her to leave stupid notes.

AB

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:02:30 PM EDT

[#38]

Tell her that rubbing one off on the internet makes you feel better then doing it on her sister...I bet she wont be up for fighting anymore...

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:09:43 PM EDT

[#39]

forget it happened, it's a fact of life, my gf doesn't know if I do or not, I don't care. She watches late night HBO some times...

just make her dinner this once and expect her to forget about it.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:12:07 PM EDT

[#40]

Well tonight be sure to search for sites on donkey love, really weird obscure shit, ect.... so that she will see your history and go.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:12:39 PM EDT

[#41]

First off, was it a joke? Don't overreact if it might be.

Second, if it isn't a joke, either 1) tell her to mind her own business or 2) put more disturbing things in your history (how to dispose of a body, creative uses of poo, etc).

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:27:46 PM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:

Quoted:
There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

No, there are thousands of divorces happening in America because people get married without knowing all of the pertinent information about their future spouse. Porn isn't the problem, people who never should have married in the first place are.

Yes, it is...I have counseled too many husbands and wives when this subject comes up threatening the marriage. Sometimes ending it.

Make all the excuses pointing to other troubles...this is a root. Period. I do this for living, do not mess with me.

Hiding porn is a cause, and people not being honest is an effect?

No...porn itself hurts couples.

It makes women feel inadequate and takes a husband's mind off of her and on the silicone babe doing God knows what in front of a camera. It is not real..it is fantasy..live in a fantasy world long enough, you will lose reality. This is where you are supposed to live.

That is true for absolutely everything on this planet. Anything in gratuitous excess is hurtful to people. And like you said, that is true about living in a fantasy world. What's the solution? Absolutely no fictional TV, video games, books, vacations? Or are those only problems when people go beyond reasonable moderation? Why is sexual fantasy, something that is basically hardwired into our brains, the black sheep in of the group?

Or is the real problem that people who say they are ok with it, even think they are ok with it, but not really ok with it and let it simmer for years until it boils over? Or someone who goes to great lengths to hide it, and is very successful at it ... and one day their partner finds out. In either case, you blame the effect, in this case porn, over people's inability to have an honest relationship with their partner?

It isn't that I don't think porn can't be a problem, or that it might commonly be a problem, but porn in and of itself isn't the problem.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:32:38 PM EDT

[#43]

Looking at porn when she can't/won't "play" is ok.
Looking at porn when she's ready, willing, and able, is not.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:33:00 PM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:

Quoted:

There are thousands of divorces in America because of pornography..it is an addiction that is hurting men and their families.

The porn isn't the problem. As in this situation the OP says he was denied that is something physical that has both physical and mental aspects that need to be dealt with. Porn didn't cause it, porn didn't make it work, if anything porn brought a calm solution to mix. I guess he could have beat woman and forced her to have sex... or would porn have been the cause of that too?

If his partner would have made sure she had taken care of his needs, instead of just focusing on herself, this situation never would have happend. A selfish partner is a bigger cause of divorce than pictures ever could be.

Wrong..you guys really have no clue on this subject matter.

I deal with couples on a weekly basis with this being the number 2 problem that causes divorce (finances #1)...I have an on staff Dr. who I send the other marital problems to. Porn is a huge problem, make no mistake, make no excuses..it is an elephant sitting in the room. Ask your wives, if they it's no problem, ask someone elses wife..it will eventually become a landslide of information for you.

What I did, before getting married, was make sure her an I saw eye to eye on all kinds of things, including silly things like porn. Doing this, has eliminated the need to end up in an office like yours discussing marital problems.

I remain convinced that a little over half the people people who get married...shouldn't.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:34:34 PM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:

No...porn itself hurts couples.

It makes women feel inadequate and takes a husband's mind off of her and on the silicone babe doing God knows what in front of a camera. It is not real..it is fantasy..live in a fantasy world long enough, you will lose reality. This is where you are supposed to live.

Somebody forgot to tell my wife, apparently. Tonight, I'll remind her that the girl on girl porn she'll no doubt be watching with me is making her feel inadequate. She loves it when I tell her how to feel.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:36:21 PM EDT

[#46]

Password the computer and she won't be sifting through the browser history.

I make ALL people on MY computer use a guest account. Friends, family, GF's. Doesn't matter.

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:41:27 PM EDT

[#47]

Quoted:
Password the computer and she won't be sifting through the browser history.

I make ALL people on MY computer use a guest account. Friends, family, GF's. Doesn't matter.

This....

Posted: 6/15/2009 3:42:20 PM EDT

[#48]

Update II - Electric Bugaloo

After the place being silent as a tomb I went and asked her face-to-face whats up.
It's apparently a case of "I was having a bad day and felt ugly this morning when I woke up and my boss was being a jerk and....