Quoted:
(As a corollary to the 'would you split if she got fat' thread.)

We've been together eighteen years; raised our collective seven kids; we're in our fifties.

The first ten years alone saw me go through about nine surgeries and chronic pain that made me an asshole to everybody. My wife was there for every doctor appointment, nursed me through after every surgery. Just had another in March - she was there for that one as well.

She was slender and had an ass like Siamesed apples when we met, and always took good care of herself. Until a year ago.

She has a bulged C5-6 disc, aftereffect of an injury when she was eighteen. She just rolled over in bed one morning last July and went into spasm that's never really stopped; her left arm is atrophying quickly, with a burning stripe all the way down into her thumb and index finger. Batteries of Prednisone helped some, but not much, over the months. She aggravated the problem back in March, and is worse now.

Between the steroids and reduction in activity, she's about sixty pounds overweight. This is especially alarming given that both of her parents died from diabetes-related health issues; she had gestational diabetes during a pregnancy.


my wife had a bulging c5-c6 6 years ago had it removed. The only thing it has done is stabilize her neck. Prior to that she was a vibrant ginger who had been a ballerina. She has put on weight doesnt like it cause she had always enjoyed exercise. Its agony watching someone who had been so active turn into what she has but considering she has been my wife for the last 25 years.

Trying to get the surgeon's office to interface with the insurance company while she's on painkillers (that don't) is wearing her out. I took the day off work today, just to help her with the endless, fruitless phone calls and emails. The surgery is common and simple, and she needs the relief badly.

But so do I. I'm standing here helplessly, watching her life slip away in endless pain and sorrow.

She's never gonna stop traffic in a bikini again, and nobody's gonna ask me to pose for a fundraiser calendar again, either. We got old, see. Knew it was gonna happen.

She is no longer physically attractive. An acquaintance we had not seen for a couple years remarked that she had really "let herself go"; I had to walk away, didn't know whether to cry or kill.

I sorta get the "let yourself go" thing and all - not sure how the physical appearance can be such a deal-breaker if you've given your life to someone. But this is not that, not at all, and if she ever ends up in a gutter it'll be while I'm holding her hand.

Quoted:
The effects of a debilitating injury isn't really "letting yourself go". Should've smacked that guy.

Beyond the fact that it's from an injury, that's something that polite people just don't say.

Quoted:
Okay....after on two cell phones and the laptop all day long...we are told insurer will be sending confirmation of coverage to surgeon within next 72 hrs.

I'm nearly afraid to hope this is getting settled, but she could get surgery as soon as a week from Friday if this comes together.

Quoted:
wheres that thread.  id love to fuck my fat wife if she got fat. what a dick.

Quoted:
I'm so sorry for your wife's pain and the horrible ordeal you both are going thru... Hang in there OP, you sound like a trooper!  

Quoted:
(As a corollary to the 'would you split if she got fat' thread.)

We've been together eighteen years; raised our collective seven kids; we're in our fifties.

The first ten years alone saw me go through about nine surgeries and chronic pain that made me an asshole to everybody. My wife was there for every doctor appointment, nursed me through after every surgery. Just had another in March - she was there for that one as well.

She was slender and had an ass like Siamesed apples when we met, and always took good care of herself. Until a year ago.

She has a bulged C5-6 disc, aftereffect of an injury when she was eighteen. She just rolled over in bed one morning last July and went into spasm that's never really stopped; her left arm is atrophying quickly, with a burning stripe all the way down into her thumb and index finger. Batteries of Prednisone helped some, but not much, over the months. She aggravated the problem back in March, and is worse now.

Between the steroids and reduction in activity, she's about sixty pounds overweight. This is especially alarming given that both of her parents died from diabetes-related health issues; she had gestational diabetes during a pregnancy.

Trying to get the surgeon's office to interface with the insurance company while she's on painkillers (that don't) is wearing her out. I took the day off work today, just to help her with the endless, fruitless phone calls and emails. The surgery is common and simple, and she needs the relief badly.Yo

But so do I. I'm standing here helplessly, watching her life slip away in endless pain and sorrow.

She's never gonna stop traffic in a bikini again, and nobody's gonna ask me to pose for a fundraiser calendar again, either. We got old, see. Knew it was gonna happen.

She is no longer physically attractive. An acquaintance we had not seen for a couple years remarked that she had really "let herself go"; I had to walk away, didn't know whether to cry or kill.

I sorta get the "let yourself go" thing and all - not sure how the physical appearance can be such a deal-breaker if you've given your life to someone. But this is not that, not at all, and if she ever ends up in a gutter it'll be while I'm holding her hand.

Quoted:
Best of luck.

Quoted:
(As a corollary to the 'would you split if she got fat' thread.)

We've been together eighteen years; raised our collective seven kids; we're in our fifties.

The first ten years alone saw me go through about nine surgeries and chronic pain that made me an asshole to everybody. My wife was there for every doctor appointment, nursed me through after every surgery. Just had another in March - she was there for that one as well.

She was slender and had an ass like Siamesed apples when we met, and always took good care of herself. Until a year ago.

She has a bulged C5-6 disc, aftereffect of an injury when she was eighteen. She just rolled over in bed one morning last July and went into spasm that's never really stopped; her left arm is atrophying quickly, with a burning stripe all the way down into her thumb and index finger. Batteries of Prednisone helped some, but not much, over the months. She aggravated the problem back in March, and is worse now.

Between the steroids and reduction in activity, she's about sixty pounds overweight. This is especially alarming given that both of her parents died from diabetes-related health issues; she had gestational diabetes during a pregnancy.

Trying to get the surgeon's office to interface with the insurance company while she's on painkillers (that don't) is wearing her out. I took the day off work today, just to help her with the endless, fruitless phone calls and emails. The surgery is common and simple, and she needs the relief badly.

But so do I. I'm standing here helplessly, watching her life slip away in endless pain and sorrow.

She's never gonna stop traffic in a bikini again, and nobody's gonna ask me to pose for a fundraiser calendar again, either. We got old, see. Knew it was gonna happen.

She is no longer physically attractive. An acquaintance we had not seen for a couple years remarked that she had really "let herself go"; I had to walk away, didn't know whether to cry or kill.

I sorta get the "let yourself go" thing and all - not sure how the physical appearance can be such a deal-breaker if you've given your life to someone. But this is not that, not at all, and if she ever ends up in a gutter it'll be while I'm holding her hand.

Quoted:
Folks - I really appreciate the support you've all shown.

But this thread was kind of a selfish move for me. I needed to vent this, because I got pissed that someone would just split from their vows over fat.

I know there's more to it than just that, but I needed to know there's more people out there that see commitment as paramount. While a nice ass and perky boobage is pretty bitchin', those aren't what changed my dressings and kept me fed after surgeries.

Quoted:
Okay....after on two cell phones and the laptop all day long...we are told insurer will be sending confirmation of coverage to surgeon within next 72 hrs.

I'm nearly afraid to hope this is getting settled, but she could get surgery as soon as a week from Friday if this comes together.

Quoted:
if she ever ends up in a gutter it'll be while I'm holding her hand.

Quoted:
You are a good man and Husband. You made a vow and you're keeping it. Fuck what others say.

A lot of people just don't get it, wun.

Anyone who makes a comment like that should be bitch slapped, flapping their jaw without knowing all the circumstances.

My wife is suffering from MS and is slowly going downhill, but is somewhat stable. It's frustrating for her when she can't keep up, or when her right side is numb and acting up. Being outside in the heat only makes things worse. We're outdoor people. Snowmobiles, ATVs, Motorcycles, camping, etc. Sometimes she feels like she is holding up my fun and/or holding everyone up if we are in a group, but she knows I'll always wait for her no matter what.

"For better or worse" means just that. Too many people are shallow, selfish douchebags only concerned with appearances. I'm relatively confident that some of the members here who complain about their wives "letting themselves go" are no fucking Adonis themselves.

Quoted:
You're a good man - a real man.

Quoted:
You are a good man and Husband. You made a vow and you're keeping it. Fuck what others say.

A lot of people just don't get it, wun.

Anyone who makes a comment like that should be bitch slapped, flapping their jaw without knowing all the circumstances.

My wife is suffering from MS and is slowly going downhill, but is somewhat stable. It's frustrating for her when she can't keep up, or when her right side is numb and acting up. Being outside in the heat only makes things worse. We're outdoor people. Snowmobiles, ATVs, Motorcycles, camping, etc. Sometimes she feels like she is holding up my fun and/or holding everyone up if we are in a group, but she knows I'll always wait for her no matter what.

"For better or worse" means just that. Too many people are shallow, selfish douchebags only concerned with appearances. I'm relatively confident that some of the members here who complain about their wives "letting themselves go" are no fucking Adonis themselves.

Quoted:

OP, something to consider is a "TENS" unit.  (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulation
About the size of a cell phone, electrode pads are placed on the patient, and the unit provides electrical stimulation to the nerves.

Your wife would wear this unit through out the day, I had a supervisor who used one, claimed it helped his back pain....I never knew his level of injury / pain severity.

I read about them back in the '80's.

Quoted:
(As a corollary to the 'would you split if she got fat' thread.)

We've been together eighteen years; raised our collective seven kids; we're in our fifties.

The first ten years alone saw me go through about nine surgeries and chronic pain that made me an asshole to everybody. My wife was there for every doctor appointment, nursed me through after every surgery. Just had another in March - she was there for that one as well.

She was slender and had an ass like Siamesed apples when we met, and always took good care of herself. Until a year ago.

She has a bulged C5-6 disc, aftereffect of an injury when she was eighteen. She just rolled over in bed one morning last July and went into spasm that's never really stopped; her left arm is atrophying quickly, with a burning stripe all the way down into her thumb and index finger. Batteries of Prednisone helped some, but not much, over the months. She aggravated the problem back in March, and is worse now.

Between the steroids and reduction in activity, she's about sixty pounds overweight. This is especially alarming given that both of her parents died from diabetes-related health issues; she had gestational diabetes during a pregnancy.

Trying to get the surgeon's office to interface with the insurance company while she's on painkillers (that don't) is wearing her out. I took the day off work today, just to help her with the endless, fruitless phone calls and emails. The surgery is common and simple, and she needs the relief badly.

But so do I. I'm standing here helplessly, watching her life slip away in endless pain and sorrow.

She's never gonna stop traffic in a bikini again, and nobody's gonna ask me to pose for a fundraiser calendar again, either. We got old, see. Knew it was gonna happen.

She is no longer physically attractive. An acquaintance we had not seen for a couple years remarked that she had really "let herself go"; I had to walk away, didn't know whether to cry or kill.

I sorta get the "let yourself go" thing and all - not sure how the physical appearance can be such a deal-breaker if you've given your life to someone. But this is not that, not at all, and if she ever ends up in a gutter it'll be while I'm holding her hand.

Quoted:



Could you get the surgery done overseas and just pay out of pocket??

Quoted:
Your wife is everything and anything a man could want or ever need in a woman. She is the kind of woman that men die for.  You chose wisely.  

Quoted:


You're a good man - a real man.

Quoted:


Folks - I really appreciate the support you've all shown.



But this thread was kind of a selfish move for me. I needed to vent this, because I got pissed that someone would just split from their vows over fat.



I know there's more to it than just that, but I needed to know there's more people out there that see commitment as paramount. While a nice ass and perky boobage is pretty bitchin', those aren't what changed my dressings and kept me fed after surgeries.

Quoted:
If you have the means and option, go for a disk replacement rather than fusion. Fusion just kicks the can down the road, putting more strain on the adjoining disks. At least at the cervical area, it's not as dicey as lower back but a replacement is the better option.

That said, even in pain and being inactive, there's nothing stopping someone from eating right and adjusting portions - work with your wife to do this, it's important...especially during recovery from disk issues. Diet is important, so is being at an ideal weight. It's part of caring for each other. It's part of recovery, and should be part of her getting better.

I've been through this with my back and my wife too, i've been down this road and there's light at the end you just do what it takes.


I admire your devotion to your wife, and we love them through the thick and thin.