Advice If You Plan To Visit Texas - Page 2

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Advice If You Plan To Visit Texas (Page 2 of 4)

Posted: 8/5/2005 11:50:48 AM EDT

[#1]

Quoted:
Austin=California

the rest of TX is great.
God Bless texas....

I live in San Antonio and work in Austin. People ask why I dont just move to Austin. Its like moving out of Texas to Cali. No thanks..

Sigh. More misinformation.

Austin != Kalifornia. There is just a large number of idiots that live here, on top of that add the large college population, State Government (along with all the whacko activisits), and ALL these morons just LOVE to be "visible". As stated, there are PLENTY of good folks out here, we just don't co-mingle with the trash.

Posted: 8/5/2005 11:52:14 AM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:
When visiting Texas...

1. If you don't bring a gun, someone can loan you one

2. People do have names like bubba and one guy I worked with down there was named Booger

3. You'll probably get bitch slapped for not bringing a gun

4. Meat is a meal in itself. All other food is "fixins"

5. Anyone not from Texas is a Yankee even those from Tennesse, Georgia, and Louisiana

6. Ya'll has a lot of different meanings

7. Things are not necessarily bigger in Texas; they are just spread out over 100 miles

I just spent 3 1/2 months in Texas. Never saw a state so proud of itself before. Don't eff with Texas.

Damn straight!

-Storm

Posted: 8/5/2005 11:53:13 AM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:
Real World Austin debuts with a street fight with locals
The Real World Austin debuted last night with a literal bang, as Danny got punched in the head by someone in the street and literally broke his face.

Besides the fight, the cast basically talked about banging one another, showered together, drank a lot, and talked about banging one another. This seemed to prove that, after 16 seasons, producers have either forgotten how to tell stories, select cast members who are even vaguely interesting, or amuse me in my apparently very old age.

Saw that one, even though I hardly ever watch Real World or anything on MTV. I loved the line "She's going to screw every guy here. I don't just mean in this house, I mean in Austin."

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:02:30 PM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:03:05 PM EDT

[#5]

Quoted:
Quoted:
3. Don't order a bottle of pop or a can of soda. In Texas it's called a coke.

You guys call your pop "coke" even if the pop is a Mountain Dew?!

Savages!

hey man, at least they don't call their pop soda!

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:05:10 PM EDT

[#6]

Quoted:
I love Arizona, but if I ever have to leave here I'm going BACK TO TEXAS.

+1!

Either that or maybe Nevada....

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:07:13 PM EDT

[#7]

Quoted:
Austin=California

the rest of TX is great.
God Bless texas....

I live in San Antonio and work in Austin. People ask why I dont just move to Austin. Its like moving out of Texas to Cali. No thanks..

actually, the california influence in austin is pretty much limited to the area between mopac and 35, bounded in the north by 2222, and in the south by ben white. outside of that, it's still texas. suburbs like manor, leander, liberty hill, etc. are pure texas.

sometimes i miss the place.

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:07:27 PM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
I like TX. Most great Texans were born in TN.

And don't think we'll ever forget it, either.

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:09:02 PM EDT

[#9]

Bob remembers the armadillo world headquarters. Two weeks ago the Guadalupe tube ride was great.

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:10:56 PM EDT

[#10]

Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

ouch

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:36:05 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Just what ARFCOM needs, another Texas circle jerk. Is it a new month already?

You're just pissed because the worst drivers in Texas have "Land of Enchantment" plates on their cars.

Yeah, I'm pissed about all the bad drivers in Texas that are from New Mexico

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:48:45 PM EDT

[#12]

+1 on the demographics of Austin. Have lived Central, East of 35, and now am right next to Williamson County.

Sat or a Jury for a gang banger for rape and dealing heroin - he got probation in Travis County - would not have made it home from the arrest in Williamson or Hayes. (course his neightbors might have gotten shot in Hayes - they have trouble reading door numbers)

Posted: 8/5/2005 12:57:34 PM EDT

[#13]

I've never met anyone named Bodie.

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:08:39 PM EDT

[#14]

Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

I'm sure you're familiar with the saying, propane boy.....

Lots of big talkers in TX

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:17:11 PM EDT

[#15]

So, what IS in the basement of the Alamo?

Here's a visitor's tip to those contemplating a visit to Texas: take your time. I reccommend I-10 through Houston. Allow 3 days. If you're coming from G W Bush Int'l, bring change. Lots of change.

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:25:38 PM EDT

[#16]

Se it is posts like that that show the pent up frustation of being the second biggest state .

Get over it .

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:28:25 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
Se it is posts like that that show the pent up frustation of being the second biggest state .

Get over it .

I heard they were going to cut Alaska in half and make Texas the third largest state.

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:36:03 PM EDT

[#18]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Se it is posts like that that show the pent up frustation of being the second biggest state .

Get over it .
I heard they were going to cut Alaska in half and make Texas the third largest state.

Defrost Alaska and it would be about the size of...Kansas!

And about as thrilling!

Eric The(TrueTexan)Hun

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:36:46 PM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
Everything's better in Texas.

Everything

Except public land to visit and play on. If you don't know anyone with a ranch, there ain't much point in visiting Texas. No insult intended.

Texas Parks and Wildlife Department (TPWD) offers a variety of hunting opportunities through two public hunting systems. The $48 Annual Public Hunting Permit provides nearly year-round hunting on approximately 1.2 million acres of land.

Texas has a huge state park system to play in.

I love Texas. I live to Hunt, Shoot, fish etc; and Texas offers the best of these things I love.

Wimminz is nice too.

Posted: 8/5/2005 1:40:01 PM EDT

[#20]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Se it is posts like that that show the pent up frustation of being the second biggest state .

Get over it .
I heard they were going to cut Alaska in half and make Texas the third largest state.

It could happen .

Posted: 8/5/2005 3:04:00 PM EDT

[#21]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

I'm sure you're familiar with the saying, propane boy.....

Lots of big talkers in TX

yep, just checked.....................you were still wrong, amazingly so

Posted: 8/5/2005 3:15:21 PM EDT

[#22]

Quoted:
Welcome to Texas!

Now Go Home!

The very first thing real Yankees need to know about visting Texas is....don't.

Eric The(AndTakeYour'BlueState'AttitudesHomeWithYou)Hun

Virginia isn't blue Hun boy!

Besides Gen. hood was a pansy compared to Gen. Stonewall Jackson.

Posted: 8/5/2005 3:26:05 PM EDT

[#23]

<snort snort>
I am not born a Texan, but I got here as fast as I can...

Only two thinks I hate about Texas

The pizza sucks
The drivers suck worse than the pizza

everything else is "numba one GI"

Posted: 8/5/2005 3:55:14 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

I'm sure you're familiar with the saying, propane boy.....

Lots of big talkers in TX

yep, just checked.....................you were still wrong, amazingly so

You really don't know that "all hat, no cattle" isn't meant to be taken literally, do you????

Of course you have a lot of cattle in TX. Fantastic. But (in keepeing with the spirit of the FIGURE OF SPEECH) you have more hat than you do cattle. Get it? Huh?

Posted: 8/5/2005 5:51:43 PM EDT

[#25]

Quoted:
Quoted:
There is only 2 things that come from Texas, steers and queers. With all this talking about you wanting to do something to my ass, I guess I know which line you fall on.

Well idn' 'at cute? Another Yankee watched Full Metal Jacket.

(Edited to make it mo' betta')

Umm last time I checked North Carolina was apart of the Southern States.

Posted: 8/5/2005 5:54:23 PM EDT

[#26]

I love TEXAS!

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:11:00 PM EDT

[#27]

A Texan died and went to heaven where St. Peter met him at the Pearly Gates.

“Show me what you got, Pete,” he said.

St. Peter swung open the gates and
revealed a beautiful landscape of mountains, rivers, streams, trees, flowers and all the trimmings.

“We’ve got that in Texas. We call it King Ranch,” said the Texan.

St. Pete flashed up a scene of men, women and children frolicking on the countryside, riding coaches, swinging, swimming, riding horses, bicycling, etc.

“We’ve got that, too. We call it Six Flags.”

Whereupon St. Peter threw open a trapdoor of the fires of Hell and out shot a huge ball of fire followed by a solid stream of flame sweeping over the entire area. The
blinding light and heat were enormous.

“We don’t have that,” said the Texan, “but we’ve got a guy in Houston who can put it
out.”

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:14:41 PM EDT

[#28]

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:18:10 PM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:
Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Depends. You gotta get all five questions right in order to be an officially adopted Texan.

1) Chili: Beans or no beans?

2) All people from outside of Texas are known as "them dang far'ners" or...

3) Y'all: Singular or plural?

4) Pecan pie: puh-kahn, or pee-can?

5) If there's something peculiar or unlikable about a person, he is said to be... (hint: what would a certain cartoon propane salesman say?)

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:21:43 PM EDT

[#30]

Quoted:
A Texan died and went to heaven where St. Peter met him at the Pearly Gates.

“Show me what you got, Pete,” he said.

St. Peter swung open the gates and
revealed a beautiful landscape of mountains, rivers, streams, trees, flowers and all the trimmings.

“We’ve got that in Texas. We call it King Ranch,” said the Texan.

St. Pete flashed up a scene of men, women and children frolicking on the countryside, riding coaches, swinging, swimming, riding horses, bicycling, etc.

“We’ve got that, too. We call it Six Flags.”

Whereupon St. Peter threw open a trapdoor of the fires of Hell and out shot a huge ball of fire followed by a solid stream of flame sweeping over the entire area. The
blinding light and heat were enormous.

“We don’t have that,” said the Texan, “but we’ve got a guy in Houston who can put it
out.”

I haven't heard that one before!

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:27:00 PM EDT

[#31]

Quoted:
Quoted:

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Depends. You gotta get all five questions right in order to be an officially adopted Texan.

1) Chili: Beans or no beans? Thats easy, NO

2) All people from outside of Texas are known as "them dang far'ners" or... yankees

3) Y'all: Singular or plural? both

4) Pecan pie: puh-kahn, or pee-can? Puh

5) If there's something peculiar or unlikable about a person, he is said to be... (hint: what would a certain cartoon propane salesman say?) Thats a tough one. I've never watched any more than a few minutes of that show. But as they say, "That boy just aint right".

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:28:57 PM EDT

[#32]

Quoted:
wgjhsafT,

Where exactly did you meet someone named Booger? I might just know the same guy.

At an electric supply store in the DFW area. I went to help the elec. supervisor pick up some items one day and as soon as we walked in a guy yelled out "BOOGER!" Seems behind us was a guy whose name was actually Booger.

I had a good laugh over that one. I don't think I would mess with Booger either, he was quite the large fellow.

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:33:18 PM EDT

[#33]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Depends. You gotta get all five questions right in order to be an officially adopted Texan.

1) Chili: Beans or no beans? Thats easy, NO

2) All people from outside of Texas are known as "them dang far'ners" or... yankees

3) Y'all: Singular or plural? both

4) Pecan pie: puh-kahn, or pee-can? Puh

5) If there's something peculiar or unlikable about a person, he is said to be... (hint: what would a certain cartoon propane salesman say?) Thats a tough one. I've never watched any more than a few minutes of that show. But as they say, "That boy just aint right".

"that boy ain't right" works, as well as "asinine."

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:34:29 PM EDT

[#34]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Depends. You gotta get all five questions right in order to be an officially adopted Texan.

1) Chili: Beans or no beans? Thats easy, NO Correct.

2) All people from outside of Texas are known as "them dang far'ners" or... yankees Correct.

3) Y'all: Singular or plural? both Plural. It's only singular if you're speaking to a single person about the group or company he belongs to; i.e., asking a store clerk "y'all carry Red Man in a pouch?"

4) Pecan pie: puh-kahn, or pee-can? Puh Correct. If you EVER asked my grandmother for a pee-can, you got something completely different.

5) If there's something peculiar or unlikable about a person, he is said to be... (hint: what would a certain cartoon propane salesman say?) Thats a tough one. I've never watched any more than a few minutes of that show. But as they say, "That boy just aint right". Correct.

You were close enough. We'll let ya hang out with us until you do something to piss us off. Then we'll kick your ass.

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:36:44 PM EDT

[#35]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:

I lived in Amerillo for a short time, and have relation in the DFW area. Can I be an adopted texan?

Depends. You gotta get all five questions right in order to be an officially adopted Texan.

1) Chili: Beans or no beans? Thats easy, NO

2) All people from outside of Texas are known as "them dang far'ners" or... yankees

3) Y'all: Singular or plural? both

4) Pecan pie: puh-kahn, or pee-can? Puh

5) If there's something peculiar or unlikable about a person, he is said to be... (hint: what would a certain cartoon propane salesman say?) Thats a tough one. I've never watched any more than a few minutes of that show. But as they say, "That boy just aint right".

"that boy ain't right" works, as well as "asinine."

Asinine is a different concept, though it's generally applicable.

Posted: 8/5/2005 6:44:52 PM EDT

[#36]

Quoted:
Everything's better in Texas.

Everything.

Yep!

Posted: 8/5/2005 8:37:20 PM EDT

[#37]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Everything's better in Texas.

Everything.

Yep!

I like Texas and I dont even live there. Great people and the BBQ is the best.

Posted: 8/5/2005 9:44:26 PM EDT

[#38]

Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

So Texas generates more bullshit than any other state. Tell us something we didn't know.

Posted: 8/5/2005 10:03:38 PM EDT

[#39]

Ahh, I love my state. And that list in the first post is 100% correct.

Ya'll go to bed now, ya hear?

Posted: 8/5/2005 10:21:12 PM EDT

[#40]

Texas used to Suck for us truckers! 60 mph during the day,55 at night,and y'all can sure bet your ass they enforced it. Was damned near a career to get across,got to the point where I didn't want to see my brother in Conroe(funny,my A/C always conked out there too,with no luck of getting it fixed)

Posted: 8/6/2005 12:09:06 AM EDT

[#41]

Well I guess that makes us a bit weird. That makes atleast two "Booger's" we know of in Texas.
Mine is in Central Texas.

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:11:18 AM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
and rule #1....expect a lot of hat, and precious few cattle. The biggest thing in TX is the ego.

Cattle and Meat Value of
Inventory (Cattle Calves Steer/bull
Rank State (1,000) Calves) ($1000) Operatio Raised
1 Texas 14,532,814 13,028,67 7,252,079 144,354 4,915,101
2 Nebraska 6,732,637 7,143,061 4,953,935 29,298 2,645,580
3 Kansas 6,506,089 8,271,113 5,456,072 36,244 2,932,010
4 Oklahoma 5,321,161 4,346,420 2,311,232 58,023 1,994,975
5 California 4,968,679 3,107,562 1,411,055 17,335 1,183,658
6 Missouri 4,312,716 2,494,869 1,130,653 67,198 1,101,367
7 S. Dakota 3,723,271 2,448,551 1,332,772 20,502 1,050,831
8 Iowa 3,647,129 2,881,122 1,850,796 38,435 1,369,683
9 Wisconsin 3,440,300 1,547,935 670,528 39,593 678,517
10 Colorado 3,307,301 3,751,788 2,537,589 15,592 1,287,136
13 Minnesota 2,395,456 1,339,902 742,357 30,913 735,165
16 N.Dakota 1,810,409 1,055,343 497,884 14,232 431,286
26 Illinois 1,437,697 949,478 546,901 24,452 457,320
27 Ohio 1,282,546 7,11,149 344,743 28,244 354,934
31 Michigan 1,025,702 537,681 276,971 15,468 286,846
32 Indiana 976,701 667,846 331,134 23,025 288,776
United States 98,989,244 74,089,04 40,524,83 1,046,86 28,838,49

feel stupid yet?

So Texas generates more bullshit than any other state. Tell us something we didn't know.

jealousy is such an ugly thing

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:12:30 AM EDT

[#43]

Quoted:

You really don't know that "all hat, no cattle" isn't meant to be taken literally, do you????

Of course you have a lot of cattle in TX. Fantastic. But (in keepeing with the spirit of the FIGURE OF SPEECH) you have more hat than you do cattle. Get it? Huh?

we don't pay much attention to the opinions of un-Texans

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:27:46 AM EDT

[#44]

Quoted:
Quoted:

You really don't know that "all hat, no cattle" isn't meant to be taken literally, do you????

Of course you have a lot of cattle in TX. Fantastic. But (in keepeing with the spirit of the FIGURE OF SPEECH) you have more hat than you do cattle. Get it? Huh?

we don't pay much attention to the opinions of un-Texans

We don't in Kentucky,either! Get your ass on down to Florida,and don't spend than damned Canuck money here,either!

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:39:36 AM EDT

[#45]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
There is only 2 things that come from Texas, steers and queers. With all this talking about you wanting to do something to my ass, I guess I know which line you fall on.

Well idn' 'at cute? Another Yankee watched Full Metal Jacket.

(Edited to make it mo' betta')

Umm last time I checked North Carolina was apart of the Southern States.

Any State that has "North" as part of its name is a Yankee state.

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:42:02 AM EDT

[#46]

I visited Texas once, quite a few years ago. Had a Grandmother that lived in Nacogdoches. Went out one evening to the movie theater and saw a sign on the front door that said "Please check your guns inside the door". Fell in love with the place right then and there.

Bub

Posted: 8/6/2005 6:45:40 AM EDT

[#47]

Got this in an e-mail the other day:

Subject: MOVING TO TEXAS

Chuck was sitting in an airplane when another fellow took a seat beside him. The new guy was an absolute wreck...pale, hands shaking, biting his nails and moaning in fear.

"Hey pal, what's the matter?" Chuck asked. "Oh man....I've been transferred to Texas," the other guy answered, "there's crazy people in Texas....and they have shootings, gangs, race riots, drugs, high crime rate...."

"Hold on" Chuck interrupted, "I've lived in Texas all my life and it is not as bad as the media says. Find a nice home, go to work, mind your own business, enroll your kids in a good school and it's as safe as anywhere in the world."

The other passenger relaxed and stopped shaking for a moment and said, "Oh thank you. I've been worried to death but if you live there and say it's OK, I'll take your word for it. What do you do for a living?"

"Me?", said Chuck, "I'm a tail gunner on a bread truck in Laredo."

I thought it was funny. If y'all R anal....substiute KY for TX.

Posted: 8/6/2005 7:02:44 AM EDT

[#48]

I’ve been to Texas . You forgot # 17

17. When approaching any livestock be sure to ask
if anyone is currently dating it . Or someone might kick your ass .

Posted: 8/6/2005 7:56:37 AM EDT

[#49]

I'm a contract worker sales rep, it means that I WORK for many people at the same time selling
items in the bicycle industry.

I've worked for canadian companys three differant times, ALL three Failed to pay commisions.

I've worked for texans {note SMALL "t"} three times, ALL three BROKE their own contracts, regarding pay or lenght of employement or who I was to get payed for.

most of the time that I get hired is by phone, IF i hear any sort of TEXAN or CANADIAN in the callers voice I ask them where their from.
If a Mans contract isn't good HIS word isn't
I don't waste my time.I just tell them "no thanks, I'm not interested."

by the way, take off them damn silly hat's when you enter a building. wtf? you guy talk about manners? take the hats OFF
and also regarding manners ~DON"T BRAG

and when you move to CALIFORNIA, please remove your stupid "don't mess with texass" stickers

It's only NY'ers and texans that feel insecure in CALIFORNIA and need to remind people that
they're "imports"

CALIFORNIA would be fine if all of the liberals from other state would stay out.

my bumber sticker would read "texas, a great place for texans"

but I did have the finnest steak of my life...in texas
and in a bar one night in texas I had a drunk dude ask me where did I learn to talk
like a "weatherman" 'cuz I want to learn hows to talk like yuz

Posted: 8/6/2005 8:38:16 AM EDT

[#50]

Quoted:
I'm a contract worker sales rep, it means that I WORK for many people at the same time selling
items in the bicycle industry.

I've worked for canadian companys three differant times, ALL three Failed to pay commisions.

I've worked for texans {note SMALL "t"} three times, ALL three BROKE their own contracts, regarding pay or lenght of employement or who I was to get payed for.

most of the time that I get hired is by phone, IF i hear any sort of TEXAN or CANADIAN in the callers voice I ask them where their from.
If a Mans contract isn't good HIS word isn't
I don't waste my time.I just tell them "no thanks, I'm not interested."

by the way, take off them damn silly hat's when you enter a building. wtf? you guy talk about manners? take the hats OFF
and also regarding manners ~DON"T BRAG

and when you move to CALIFORNIA, please remove your stupid "don't mess with texass" stickers

It's only NY'ers and texans that feel insecure in CALIFORNIA and need to remind people that
they're "imports"

CALIFORNIA would be fine if all of the liberals from other state would stay out.

my bumber sticker would read "texas, a great place for texans"

but I did have the finnest steak of my life...in texas
and in a bar one night in texas I had a drunk dude ask me where did I learn to talk
like a "weatherman" 'cuz I want to learn hows to talk like yuz

Yeah, like there are no lawsuits in California for breach of contract!

Ever watch 'Pacific Heights'? You remember, the 1990 movie about the tenant (Michael Keaton) who the landlords couldn't get out of their rental unit?

That's precisely what the landlord/tenant laws are like in California!

And that's just the tip of the iceberg!

Eric The(California-WhereFelchingIsTheOfficialStatePerversion!)Hun

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Advice If You Plan To Visit Texas (Page 2 of 4)

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