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Posted: 7/31/2005 11:57:07 PM EDT
I was minding my business out in the garage, resizing some 30 carbine brass while listening to Skynard when I became aware of a hissing sound around my feet. I looked down an saw a dry leaf by my bare foot and thought I must have bumped it and heard it scraping on the floor.
Went back to my trimming and heard it again so I got curious. I started to nudge the leaf when it jumped at me, hissing and then it clamped on my little toe. I then did the"Ohgodwhatisit getitoffme" dance, knocking crap over left and right and shrieking the shriek I used to reserve for spiders. Well, I fell down and was now on the beasts' level but I finally realized my attacker was a wayward but mighty ambitious toad. It's been about ten minutes now and the heart attack did not come, so I am going back out to finish my brass and try to get the little guy out of my garage. |
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I hear by issue a manlessness citation and you have 5 points against your man licence.
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It's "pwned"... In 1337 speak the P replaces the O...... So "He was PWNED by a toad".
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In my defense, I have to say- It is not normal for land lubbing amphibians to go on the offensive against something a thousand times it's size- I was caught off guard.
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What ever you want to tell your self to help you sleep, is fine with us. |
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Hey, cut the guy a break. This was probably a mutant ZOMBIE toad. Soooo, instead of taking away points, we outta be giving the guy a few for surviving the attack without using heavy weapons.
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What were you doing, spelling cool like this: kewl?
Oooh, you got attacked by a toad. Well, that isn't so bad. At least you got to find out your adrenaline system still works. |
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actually, it's pwn3d, if you wanna get super geeky |
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BTW nice I have never had a toad attack my toe before |
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I've been known to do that dance before. Thankfully, no one had a camcorder at those times. |
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By wearing sandals, you started out behind the , manhood-wise. Your reaction to the toad was just an exclamation point on the declaration of gender ambivalence you made with your footwear.
I reserve the right to withdraw this comment if it is shown that the poster was barefoot, or is an actual monk. |
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You should have seen me when I slipped on a pair of duck club chest waders that had a mouse in it. I set the world record for "Exiting waders- male division 30 yrs and above." Still stands.
Another time I slipped mine on in the cabin and wondered why my crotch was on fire. Aptly named, Fire Ants. They had come in under the sill, and colonized my waders folded up on the floor. I've heard of people in the southwest checking their boots for scorpions in the morning- guess you'd better recon your garage. ps, I don't agree with those who are suggesting we transfer your team membership to the toad. |
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Footwear aside, it was the pink nail polish that caught the toad's attention. And it's spelled SYNYRD.That is all.Dave |
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I can't breathe! |
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I blame the schools. |
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I agree he loses 2 points for exposing his quivering mangina, however what is more chick-like than to then run and tell everyone hoping for someone to provide manly comfort? So I say he loses 2 more points for a total of 4. |
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And I'm a history major, for Pete's sake. |
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Oh,I am SO embarrassed! My very first attempt at being a spelling Nazi,and Oops! The shame of it all! |
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Don't you just hate it when you mess up a spelling flame? Karma, man; you're just not cut out for it. [edit for semi-colon use] |
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Wait until the space bar Nazis show up. |
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Go easy on me.It was my First.And Last. |
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You are forgiven. Now use a space after punctuation (not including hyphen use) and mind your capitalization, OK? Sheesh. |
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Yeah, but it worked! You had him right where he wanted you.
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oKey- dOkeY |
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-2 points off your "Man Card"
Quick flex and a "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" in the front driveway (must be shirtless, daylight and in boxers ) should restore the lost points. |
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LOL...I'm picturing that episode of America's Funniest Home Videos where that one guy was surprised by someone who jumped out of a coffin. I think it was a Halloween theme. Anyway, the guy that got spooked quivered like he was being electrocuted and screamed some woman-like, high pitched shrill.
Was that what you were like?!?! |
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First a little background. I'm pretty much an average joe. Spent some time in the Marines and work in the security business. Not a bad-ass, but no pussy either.
I used to keep two free-ranging ferrets in my apartment. The female of the duo was always somewhat half-wild (Psycho Really). One morning my alarm went off and I got out of bed to shut it off. As my hand touched the alrm I felt the little wack-jobs teeth bury themselves to the gum line on/in my ankle. YES ladies and gentlemen, a Marine hard-ass can scream like a little girl, I did the one-legged get the F off of me I'm bleedin' dance. I had the presence of mind to shut off the alarm (She must of responded to it like a wounded rabbit call, saw my foot moving and went for it). Luckily no firearms were in reach or I may of blown my own foot off trying to ex-nay the little shit. Thereafter I made damn sure the little fur-covered razor blade was on lock-down at lights out. Thats my story and I'm sticking to it. By the way, I knew a toad (Bubba) out in Florida who chased cats away from the food dish. Ray |
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I get a bunch of those big wierd "Camel Cricket" things in my gun room and everytime I see one I about freak out. I HATE THEM!!!! |
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www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?b=1&f=5&t=370993&page=3 |
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