User Panel
Posted: 12/19/2005 10:26:42 AM EDT
That you can't shoot through a loaf of bread??? WTF kind of shit is that? This was qualification with the state's private protective service board. Is there something I don't know about bread? Is white bread more bullet resistant than wheat? Please tell me this "profeshunal" instructor is a dumb ass and that I can stop wearing my bread vest.
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uh oh, this may be IBTL material...
ETA: not sure though, depends I guess. |
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I think loaves of bread are being used as Humvee armor in "Teh Suck". |
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That's why Wonderbread closed so easily, they knew that no employees would go on a shooting rampage with any success!
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You think? I am serious, this is a legitimate quote. |
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I know you're serious but there are some no-no thread topics, like poop, and bread. |
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Forgot to add, I believe he was talking about a hollow points.
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cool
<---- runs out to grocery to get loaves of bread to make me some body armor! |
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My CCW instructor told us his down filled blanket would stop some rounds . Of corse his J. Wayne impressions really sucked too.
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The instructor is 100% correct.
A bullet...even something big like 20mm or 50 BMG will not shoot through a simple loaf of plain white bread. If that loaf is about 200 yards long, and 20 yards wide. |
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And is buttered with steel. |
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Oh yeah, you didn't know that? The only reason .gov doesn't use it on the Abrams is that the flock of birds it attracts generates a kiddie pool worth of bird poop an hour...
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And now you can bake your own body armor.
White, wheat, or rye. |
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I always mix webbing in with the dough. It makes it really easy to attach to the molle on my tactical vests. |
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You can't shoot thru one of my home made biscuits. In fact, you could shoot one of my biscuits. Gotta be AP.
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...and to think the .gov has been throwing away so much tax money to up-armor our troops and vehicles when they could have just bought bread... you "instructor" may be retarded. |
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Dude a little know fact.. the ballistic skirting on the Abrams is in fact filled with a doughy bread substance. There is also panels in the turret that are filled too. Fat_McNasty 45E 87-91 |
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Fruitcake is a WMD and should be banned acordingly. Once Sadaam's Secret Fruitcake Bunker is found in Iraq.... |
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I think he may making a referene
to your friends shooting abilities... or lack there of... LOL |
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Now make a vest where you just add loaves of bread to the pockets instead of trauma plates and make a fortune!!!
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What if the bullet is made from a depleated Martha White Biscuit?
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So that was the info Rebel_Grey was trying to give to the jihadists! |
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BINGO! And beleve it or not.. At the time I was in you had to have a secret clearence to work on the system.. |
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9mm vs .45 argument in favor of the grand ol' ACP. Yep it's a known fact amongst HSLD types that the fat slow moving 45 penetrates better through the shelves of bread delivery trucks used by terrorists. -yj |
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Don't forget, you can always bake a handgun or extra mags into a loaf. Conceals really well.
Nobody would ever suspect anything if they saw you with your tactical bread attached to your tactical vest and you started digging into a loaf for your gun. They would just think you're hungry. |
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I am Copyrighting it right now...
The new BP ammunition. BP=Bread Peircing. (For Law enforcement only though.) |
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Have him go down range and hold it for a target...
right in front of his ass. Because that's what he's talking out of and that hole needs to be closed permanently. |
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Bread has divine and magically properties that prevent penetration by weapons.
This is why they are alwasy "breaking bread" in the Bible because it is well known a knife won't penetrate it. |
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Not so top secret my friend. Little known fact, but Hasbro is owned by Mattel, and as we all know Mattel did the original machining for the Colt M16 recievers. Hasbro has the Easy Bake Oven. Rumor has it the military just shipped 1000 Easy Bake ovens to Iraq. Coincidence? I think not. |
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WTF? We can't talk about poop? Is that everything poop related, or just poop itself? Like, if I said "I pooped today." would be okay, but if I said "My poop today was brown and smelled very bad" would not be okay? How about discussing various aspects of pooping? Like, being regular versus constipated versus diareaha? (some people think it funny...) I think I might have to speak with a moderator about this. I don't remember reading anything about a poop prohabition. poop. It's really a pretty funny word if you say it over and over. Poop. Poop. Poop. Poop. Poop. |
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Dude a little know fact.. the ballistic skirting on the Abrams is in fact filled with a doughy bread substance. There is also panels in the turret that are filled too. Fat_McNasty 45E 87-91 Hmmm...so maybe it's sour dough starter? Then when it's ready, take it from the M1 and bake some body armour. You know, that stuff will keep right on going as long as you feed it every so often with flour, sugar and some potato flakes...build all the armour you need, just don't forget to feed your starter! |
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Gee, guys, thanks for giving away the secret recipe for our latest version of battle armor. Now we're going to be facing car bombers running through checkpoints, loaves of bullet proof bread covering the sheetmetal.
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And it will pass through airport security unnoticed. |
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I hear all you guys talking shit. But does anyone here have any real first hand knowledge of this subject? Who here has actually shot a loaf of bread and seen the bullet completely penetrate it? Did you use both Wonder bread and thick bakery bread? Well? Lets not just talk out of our asses. This guy is professional enough to shoot bread. Unless you've been there and done that STFU!
BTW this post is meant to be sarcastic. Sometimes people don't get my humor. |
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At least until they start training TSA agents in tactical bread awareness. It's only a matter of time... |
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Wait a second, did he say you can't shoot through a loaf of bread, or that a bullet wouldn't go through? Maybe he just likes bread and thinks nobody should shoot it.
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