This mourning, as I was getting ready to go to work when I heard a thud in my sons room.  I walked in there no later than 3 seconds.  He was scrabling to recover some tapes from the floor when I barged in, as soon as he saw me he froze in place.

I asked him to hand me one of the tapes nearest him,  It said Anime way at the top of the label and the title was Dark Night.  I asked what it was and he said it was a cartoon one of his friend had lend him.  I popped it in the VCR, nothing more than one of those Japanese animation cartoons at first, but then this boluptious character appears wearing next to nothing, and then she is attacked and raped by a couple of male characters.

I was pissed, but considering that he is 16.  Maybe it's just an age thing.  Although the rape thing kinda sickens me.  Where do kids get this things from?  I thought this stuff wasn't made here in the U.S.  and that importation of such material was illegal.

And here I am thinking of giving him one of my ARs or buying him his own.

When I was 16 I had a towel in my closet that you could lean against the wall.......

[:)]

I know where that comes from.  My kid tries to listen to that rap shit.  I have tried my best to teach him that that stuff is no good but he still likes it.  My parents went through that with sex, drugs and rock and roll.  I turned out to be a good citizen.  I'd say don't panic.  Try talking to him about how bad that culture is for society and hang on hope he has a good head on his shoulders.  Get all his tapes and destroy them.

In Japan that kind of stuff is legal for just about any age to see. In that country it is illegal for the mere showing of pubic hair on video or film of real people, but anything goes in anime. Rape and graphic violence not being uncommon.

You can get them at your local Best Buy store. However those that have adult content are labeled with a big fat warning sticker just like Playboy videos you see in the "Special Interest" sections.

He's 16 years old.  This defines him as a walking hormone.  A raging walking hormone.

Japanese Anime and comic books are generally extremely sexual, usually involving bondage and rape.  It is not unusual to see the average Japanese middle manager on a Japanese commuter train reading magazines with graphic depictions of underaged girls bound and gagged with their genitals exposed.  

Somehow I doubt it's illegal to import the tapes.  Actually, I'd be surprised if the kid DIDN'T have a stash of porno of some kind or another, given the availability and the current atmosphere (as exemplified by some members of this group).  Some of the s**t you can buy at 7-11 is far worse than Japanese Anime.

Calm down.  I don't know if YOU were a monk at 16, but you need to discuss the difference between "making love" and "getting your rocks off" with him.  Hopefully your kid is still a virgin and has respect for people other than himself.  The important part is what he is [i]learning[/i] about sex.  It's your job to make sure he doesn't learn it [i]wrong[/i].

Good luck.

Is this material available at stores?  where the hell is he getting this stuff?  I sure whish I knew where him and his friends are getting it this crap from.  I would like to talk to the person whose making this shit available to a teen.

If this crap is illegal, I would have him or her arrested.

It is not illegal. IMO you are blowing this way out of proportion.

I can give you a hint where anime is readily available to everyone:

_ NT_RN_T

Want to buy a vowel?

He can probably order it through the mail from places such as U.S. Manga Corporation.  A lot of people think that because it's animated that it must be a cartoon.  Parents ought to approach it in the same way as they might with a movie such as Gladiator or DieHard.  

You can try and ban him from any of it and wonder what he's watching/doing secretly.  Or you can let him see and do whatever he wants.  Or you can try and explain what it means or doesn't mean in terms of right vs. wrong and reality vs. fiction (if you haven't already done this).

A member of this board, Golgo-13, takes his name from a Japanime series about a professional assassin.  For a nation that is so anti-gun, I find their Animes and Manga (comic book form) quite startling in detail and accuracy.  For example, Area 88, a long defunct Manga series a mercenary fighter squadron features detailed information about modern fighter aircraft along with graphic depictions of aerial combat (cannon shells ripping through cockpits and pilots, aircraft exploding, shrapnel tearing through ground targets & people).

uhhh dude? My friend and I use to rent this stuff at the local video stores (not major rental places) so I don't think it is illegal.

They rent it because they are too young to rent real pornos. Or because you lock up your pornos too well, LOL

I guess I am taking it a little over the edge.  Maybe I am just being a parent. Who knows.

It just makes me a bit upset that he gets off on this things.  He has a beutiful girlfriend, she is a really nice kid.  I am going to have a talk with him as soon as he gets home from school.  I don't want to bust his chops too much but, some of those scenes were a bit disturbing.

Sorry you fellas have to hear about my whinnig.

Maybe you could try and find out what he thinks of it.  Not all anime features that sort of hardcore violence.  Is he really "getting off" on it?  Or is it the sort of fascination he might have with something that's new and never seen before?  You could try going to Blockbuster and seeing what kind of selections they have.  At least that way you'll be familiar with it.  Perhaps you could steer him towards a series that isn't so hardcore.

Hey,
At least you didn't catch him screwing some teenaged slut. Or smoking Pot or worse. I am no one to tell you how to raise your son but keep things in perspective. Kids that age have an active need to explore new things. I bet he was embarassed as hell you saw that tape. If you raised hell and told him how you feel about that kind of thing he got the message. Good luck to you anyway. Alot of kids his age don't even have a Father so he is way ahead of some of his peers anyway.

Morphious,

I would put the situation into his hands.  Ask him what he likes about it?  How did he feel when he saw that stuff, like the rape stuff.  Many people, like us, goto movies with sex and or rape scenes in it.  I am sure we don't go to get pleasure out of it, but maybe his friend wanted him to see it cause of the cool animation.  I don't know.  Don't condem him if you saw something you didn't like. Find out what he thinks about it.  Personally, I would give it back to him and tell him to get rid of it. Maybe you have instilled all the morals in him that you thought you had.  Maybe he just was checking it out.

Communication.

Let us know what he says.  

Don't let him watch those hardcore Anime tapes. You are not supposed to be able to buy those until you are over 18. I don't think that it's a good idea to be exposed to such hardcore sexualized violence at an age where you are just discovering sex. Some of the "horror" Anime series that I've seen are worse than = A Nightmare on Elm Street. Extreme violence with sexual content. There are plenty of semi-clean Anime adventures out there for him to watch until he is old enough to move out.

As for the AR-15, living in Kali you can pretty much forget about giving him one even after the age of 18 unless you included his name on the registration. It is also illegal here to let anyone under the age of 18 to shoot your "assult rifle" even with parental supervision. The anti-bans totally suck ass.

Morph, I wouldn't freak out.  Just remove the tapes and the VCR.  When he's proved to you in some way that he has learned his lesson, then give the VCR back.  Rape scenes are disturbing, but you and I werre once 16 and a 'little disturbed' ourselves.  

I doubt the initial interest with the anime had anything to do with the fact it depicted rape. I would guess it was more towards the cartoon boobies. I understand your concern as a parent. If it was my kid I would sit down with him and talk about it. If in fact he is into the rape thing then you might have a problem on your hands. I think all of us at 16 were looking at anything and everything at first just for pure curiosity. Now that we are all grown up now it makes us perverts...[:)]  

Jesus, beagles.

That's some funny shit!!!!!  

bwaaahaaaa! rotflmao!

it's gotta be tough having tenagers. i have a 16yr old that works with me and he thinks i'm his buddy. well he is but that's beside the point, i have to call my mother on how to deal with him sometimes. they're like puppies, you have to be real patient, and show them over, and over again. and over. they allways think its play time. and they give you big sad puppie dog eyes or attitude when you have to discipline them. if i had a kid that did half the things i did, and he does..... oh, brother!

anyone who has one, and he turns out half ok, has my undying admiration. tough job.

I understand Morphious but I really would not be too terribly upset with him if he were mine.  And, I know for a fact that mine will probably be the same way when he gets to be 16.

Primarily he is just curious, I sure know I was, and to him, this is probably a good way to satisfy that curiosity right now.  I agree that there is probably other porn stashed somewhere in his room.

Discuss it with him. Don't make him feel dirty over it or as though his desire to see and know is wrong rather explain to him that some of what you saw is very disturbing and that you don't want him to get the wrong idea of how men are really supposed to treat women.

Again, perfectly natural.  I certainly remember how I was............er.......ummm.........."am", I guess I should say.  All men are perverts in  some way or another.

I'd still jerk the VCR and tapes and make him earn the VCR back later on.

Good Luck.....................you guys had the sex talk I guess huh?

Morphious,

I think you are right to be concerned.  A guy of 16 is just forming his perspective on the world in many ways.  If he were to learn to associate sexual excitation with violence it could prove to be a problem.

It is time for a calm talk.  You need to find out how much of this and for how long.  If it runs deep he may need some counseling.

Your heart is in the right place.  Good luck!

When I was 15, there was no cable in the area.  I was into electronics and rigged up and illegal microwave receiver in the attick.  I got the plans mail order from a magazine ad, and bought the parts from Radio Shack.  It took me 3 months to build and cost about $30 in parts.

I had it hooked to the tv in my bedroom.  Twice a week, late at nite they would show hardcore porn.  Eventually, my sister busted me and I had to let her watch too.  It got to be old after awhile.  My father eventually found it and made me take it down.  Fortuantely, by that time I had lost interest and I didn't really watch it much.

Try not to make TOO big a deal out of it.  It is hard enough being a teenager as it is.  Talk to him and see if he is having other problems. He may just be curious like I was.  If everything else is "normal" I wouldn't worry too much.

Let's see if I can put your mind at ease.  :)

[b]Morphious[/b], what your son has is called anime.  99 of 100 times, it comes from Japan.  It's always animated cartoons that have some type of offbeat humor.  I've seen some that are fine for kids (toilet humor only; one episode involved a commode getting angry and exploding all over someone due to that individual forgetting to flush for the fourth or fifth time in a row).  I've seen others that are fine for teens (sexual innuendo, some swearing, interesting situations; a character that changes from a boy to a girl and then back again whenever he/she/it gets wet and a talking panda bear that gives advice).  And, I've seen some truly raunchy and sick ones (Keiko Kamen; the nudist heroine liberates a nazi-esque school by using her "pink stripe of justice" ...against... the wrongdoers) that are fit for 18+.

If you've got a Suncoast, Camelot Music, Sam Goody, Musicland, Blockbuster Video, or related store nearby, you've got anime for sale.  Gaming sotres (Role playing game stores; Dungeons and Dragons, Magic: The Gathering, etc.) are noted repositories as well.  Amazon.Com also has it.

In terms of legalities, there's no concern.  I know of no law banning it outright in the USA; you may need to go to Singapore or a like country for that.  

Oh, and as for the girlfriend...  It wouldn't surprise me if she watches/watched it with him.  My guess is that she knows he has anime and either thinks it's funny, juvenile, or could care less.  For most kids/teens, it's a non-issue and would surprise many that it would be seen as an issue.

PART II CONTINUED IN NEXT POST!

PART II CONTINUED HERE

Honestly, you've not stumbled across anything to get excited over.  I used to like anime myself; if nothing else, it was funny and irreverent.  Yeah, some of it was unsituable for kids, but a 16 year old has probably seen and heard a [b]lot[/b] worse on HBO, Cinemax, in the schoolyard, in advertising (ever seen a Calvin Klein ad?), etc.  Has he ever used the internet?  If so...  Well, I guess you see where I'm going.  (Oh, incidentally, I don't watch anime anymore unless it's playing at a party.  Why'd I stop?  It's pretty juvenile and became boring.  You can only laugh at the same re-hashed plots so many times.)

Counseling?  Long talks?  I can almost assure you that the first [b]ISN'T[/b] necessary unless he's got mental problems you're not telling us about.  Long talks?  Your perogative, but I really don't think you need to worry.  

Either way, a 16 year old with secrets from his parents isn't unusual.  You didn't find hard-core gay pornography, you didn't find a dead chicken with voodoo carved on it, and you didn't find an autographed pin-up poster of Janet Reno.  [whacko]

Relax, grab a beer, and remember you're dealing with a 16 year old male.  Unless there's stuff you're not telling us, unless he was screwed up in his formative years (grade school), has trouble distinguishing fantasy from reality, etc., you're fine.  

Mike

PS.  For a reference point:  I'm 22, a male, and not a parent.  I "discovered" anime when it was more underground than it is now; about 7 years ago when I was 15 in 1994.  I watched/enjoyed it until my freshman year in college (3 years), and then got bored with it.  It used to be big with many college students, but as it got more mainstream it lost popularity.  It appears as if it's kind of waning in popularity.

If you want to ask me anything else about anime, feel free.  -Mike

Well here it goes,

Yesterday my sons gets home along with his girlfried and his other friend.  They went into his room, and 5 minutes later his male friend walked out with a black bag.  I am assuming it was the tapes.

After his girlfriend left I had a talk with him, he said they came across this stuff at a local K Mart, then got more into it, and started looking for it in different stores.  I asked him about the rape scene, and he replied with:  "I don't watch it to learn from it, I don't watch it to imulate it, and I sure like hell wouldn't do that to a girl.  It is just for fun, I don't jerk off to it, if that's what your thinking, it's just a cartoon."  After that I felt relived and dumb.  I was mainly concerned about the legality of this stuff, I mean, it would be more serious if it was harder to get, and he had to involve himself with a bunch of strangers to get it.

Anyway, I had a talk with him.  It turnes out he is a bit more mature than I thought.  As far as giving him one of my ARs, I never meant to give it to him to keep in his room or to go to the range with it on his own, I just want him to not have to ask me to shoot one, when we are at the range.  I want him to know that shooting isn't just about sending lead down range, but about the discipline and responsability of owning a fire arm.  After all keep them in working order is half the fun.

Yeah, the Japs put out some really twisted cartoons and graphic novels.  The graphic novel is really big in Japanese popular culture.  I was reading this book by Paul Theroux, the travel writer.  He was going around the world, riding by train as much as possible.  When he was in Japan riding bullet trains, he noticed how even adults would read these thick comic books and was curious.  

When the 11 year old girl he sat beside went to the restroom, she put down her graphic novel, and Theroux took a peek.  Like your son's video it was very violent, pornographic, demented stuff.  It was shocking to think this demure little Japanese girl was reading it for enjoyment.

Well the Japanese are a bit more sophisticated  than us and can easily distinguish between fantasy & reality. I've seen some of the sexual & violent anime and found it shocking at first and then mildly entertaining and then boring. I wouldn't worry about it with your 16 yr old. When I was 16 I had a nice collection of Hustler which put much more evil thoughts into my head than the cartoon boobies ever did.

You can easily get that stuff from E-Bay, amongst many other internet retailers.

I wouldn't say they are more sophisticated.  They are just preoccupied with pornography. (I mean, more than most people)

My wife and I once went on a Greek island cruise which visited the island of Delos.  The Japanese tourists on board spent most of their time videotaping the museum display cases containing ancient phallic talismans and other erotic artifacts.  

While I am an admirer of Japanese culture, I am not reflexivly admiring of the Japanese themselves.  Having lived in Japan for a year, I learned that they are ordinary people, in some respects more provincial and uneducated than stereotypical Americans.

The famed "Japanese Work Ethic" is something of a myth, by the way.  Americans work a hell of a lot harder.  The japanese just get better press because their culture generally precludes a disgruntled employee from telling his boss to shove the job up his ass.