I can't. My two damn cats follow me. They follow me everywhere. I need to stuff them in the house.

Not sure a taxidermist would stuff a cat.

It depends on how much you offer him. Everyone's got a price....



(I say, with a durn cat on my lap that I can't get rid of!!! )

I took my dog for a run after work today.  Can you put your cats on leashes?

They'll run with me. I tried a leash once, no like. I just don't want them in the road or far from the house. My cats act like dogs.

(Customer comes in with two squirells)

(Taxidermist). You want them mounted?

 

(Customer with a puzzled look). No Sir, shaking hands will be just fine.

Rag dolls are cool like that. I've got three and the biggest one thinks he is a dog.

I had a "fetch cat" many years ago. She LOVED to fetch the rings that come off milk jugs when you take the lid off. She would bring you the rings and drop them in your lap, or next to you, on the sofa, for you to throw across the living room. It had hardwood floors, and she chased them full tilt, so she was constantly sliding into walls, and furniture, as she barreled around the living room at top speed, chasing those durn rings. She became a menace after a while, if you quit throwing them, and would pester you non-stop, until you threw the next one. Heaven forbid a ring would land where she couldn't get it, cuz she'd go to digging, and meowing, til you came and retrieved it, or found another one to throw for her. I've never seen another cat like her, before, or since.