So my wife and I recently purchased our first house as you guys know. It has been almost 11 weeks since we closed and moved in. It took us about a month move all of our stuff from our apartment, as we did it ourselves a little at a time, and we had about 5 weeks overlap from when we closed to the time our lease was up.

Prior to the house, we both lived in an apartment together for about a year and a half. She was in the apartment for about 6 months by herself until I moved in. Prior to that, I was living with my parents, in the same house I had lived in my whole life. I did not move around.

My wife almost instantly "felt at home" in the new house. She loves the place and she is super happy. I really like the house as well, it is in a good neighborhood in a good town, with good schools and all. There are a few minor things I want to change, like I just put the patio in the front to make it nicer and look better. Typical little house projects here and there.

Myself, on the other hand, did not "feel at home" right off the bat. It felt more like home once we got all the furniture in, and got everything settled. Each day, it does feel more like home, but I am not on her level yet.

I did a little reading, and it seems to be normal for a new house to not feel like home right off the bat. Some people take a year to finally "feel at home" and some people do it right off the bat. I understand that moving into MY first house can be a huge step forward and a huge change in my life, so it makes sense why I am still adjusting.

So my curiosity question to you guys, is how long did it take for you to feel "at home" in your new house / apartment etc.

I was living with my parents until I bought my house, with my wife and son on the way, it took alittle while to "adjust" to owning my own house. I think painting and doing projects/upgrades I wanted done to the house made it feel more like a home, as it was becoming a reflection of me and my wife and not the previous owners. It take some work but you will get there, don't rush anything as there will ALWAYS be something that needs to be done. We have been here almost 3 years now and it is definitely a home to us now and has been for awhile.

After leaving my childhood home of 18 years for a new house, it took well over a year to settle it in my mind that this was home.

Thanks for the replies guys. I know this thread is a little more "touchy feely" than the usual threads on here lol

My parents house was "home" from day one. I grew up there my whole life. Spent 24-1/2 years there until I moved into the apartment.

I loved the apartment to be honest. Was on the 6th floor (top floor) and was perfect size for us (about 750 sq feet). A little small for when we wanted to have a party, but perfect for just the two of us. However, I did not like the area, nor the neighbors. There were very few "normal" people in the building. Allot of sketchy people and allot of people who needed outside attention (mentally handicap or section 8). The cops were at the building probably 2 or 3 times a month. Our neighbors use to have shouting matches all the time, and the apartment below us would play loud music all night. Plus the "community laundry room" was never a fun place.

If we had normal people in the building, I probably wouldn't have moved out as soon as we did.

A house isn't "Home" until the first time you fart in it - this is a scientific fact. So, it really depends on how long that takes. My advice? Go out for messican one night, it'll feel like home in no time!

Steps I took to make me feel at home
1. Walk around naked, w/o worrying who might come home.
2. Have "alone time" in common areas.
3. Relieve yourself in the yard.
4. Do something you wouldn't do at someone else's house or something you'd stop someone else from doing because "this isn't their house".

Painting the walls and hanging pictures will make it feel yours.

Soon enough, snow will be on the ground and you'll know it's your house, because your shoveling

Leave guns all over the house.  Kitchen counters, bathtub, on the couch, etc.  
Then it'll really feel like yours

Bought the house but didn't move in right away and worked on the house nearly every night for 3 months. After spending all that time in the house doing all that work I felt at home the second we moved our stuff in.

After living in the same place for 14 years I bought a house with my now wife last May. It was weird, like your wife, she felt at home almost immediately. "It's ours." she would always tell me. It was an adjustment for me.

I mean, we closed in May and didn't move in until I think late June because I was doing some work so I already knew the house inside and out by the time we moved in, but it still wasn't "home" for a while. I'd say it took a good few months to really get used to it. It took about 6 months for me to stop going into autopilot on my way home from work and starting to go towards the wrong house

One of my favorite things about the CTHTF... real people discussing real life. Gun talk is obviously plentiful as well, but it's always a good place to seek advice on almost any topic and there's always friendly, local people offering their help/support/advice

For me it "felt" like home when I actually referred to my house as my home.

When your able to walk around naked.

I closed on a Wednesday, changed locks Thursday and moved in on friday

We closed in the late morning on a Thirsday. Went right to the house and ripped out all the carpets, had the wood floors refinished and then moved in a the next weekend. That was 10 years ago. We have been working on it ever since.

It took a few months for me to realize this was home but it took a year or so for us to feel like this is home.

Once it's paid maybe?

Can't tell you. I moved around a bunch as a kid and joined the army right out of high school and proceeded to bounce around there. I never had a place for too long so I never learned this home feeling. I bought our house in 2010 and now have 3 kids with the wife. She feels it is home and said she would be sad a little if we ever moved but I could leave in a moments notice and never look back. We have talked about this same topic fairly recently. I hope you feel settled sooner rather than later.

I remember talking to my wife a week or so after we moved in and it hit me, this is our house. It's  a great feeling ! Good luck!

There are a couple of old cliches, "A house is not a home" followed by "home is where the heart is".  Cripes, I must be as old as these cliches!. Congratulations on buying your first house, you and your wife will make it into your "home".  It will take a bit of time for the newness to wear off but you will gain pride in personalizing it (as you've already started), continue to work hard to keep it and enjoy the feeling of having something that is yours, no one else's.  Best wishes for a long and happy life.

Seconded!





OP, we're in almost the exact same boat. Lived with my parents for 23-24 years, two of which I was in a dorm but came home most weekends. My girlfriend (of 6 years) and I lived in an apartment together for ~2 years, and just moved in to our first house 4 months ago. She is madly in love with it, thinks its our forever house already. Im more, well, "indifferent". Its a great neighborhood and everything, but I'm just looking forward to skyrocketing the equity in it and moving on in 8-10 years. That said, I wouldn't mind raising a kid through high school here and moving on after.

We closed on a Monday, painted/cleaned for 3 days and moved all our stuff in one shot. Move in day was lease termination day at the apartment, so it was all or nothing.


When Im driving home from work, I still go into autopilot and take a wrong turn back toward the apartment or my parents house once in a while. I laugh at myself when it happens. It definitely did not feel like "home" the first month or two, and there are still aspects and parts of the house that feel alien to me. I can say with certainty, the more work I put in to it, the more at home I feel. I just replaced all the windows, and now every surface has been painted, so that is really nice. But all the doors still need replacing, the trim is in really sad shape etc. All inside work I will do over the winter. Im trying to buckle down the insulation etc before the cold gets here.



I feel VERY awkward outside. Most of my neighbors are retired (except for the female divorce attorney across the street, and her two daughters), and I feel like no matter what Im doing outside, somebody is watching me (and they are). They are all very very nice, I've met them all and we're all very cordial, but they have ALL been in these homes for 25+ years, and Im the new guy. Its not that they aren't welcoming or anything, its just that, well, I guess I just don't really feel "at home" out there yet.

If I've got anything to add, I guess its that a house is just a house, its up to you guys to make it a home. Whatever that means, full on renovations or just decorating, Im sure its different for everyone, and every different scenario.




While we were waiting for closing, my SO bought a flagpole to hang Old Glory off the front of our house, right next to our front door. It is the very first thing we did. We closed, got the keys, drove to the house, and hung up that flag. Damn I love that woman.

First day,home is where you make it...a house,condo or apt is just a physical dwelling

This is why I keep lurking here  My soon to be ex & I started building our house 16 years ago.  It took a year to complete and I was involved in quite a bit of the process so by the time we moved in it was all decorated like our "vision".  In my case the first night I was pretty comfortable.  Now with the soon to be ex moving on I am planning some changes to make it "Home" for my son and I.

Good Luck!

You like to see homos naked?

Thank you again everybody for the responses.

On a side note, our custom dining room table finally came in, It was a special order table that took 11 weeks to come in. It is also the last piece of furniture we bought / moved into the house.

With the completion of the front patio (my first big project to the house) and the delivery of the table, it definitely helped to make the house feel more like "home".