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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:29:42 PM EST

Originally Posted By LinggrrLonggrr:
Originally Posted By Lootie23:
I may need the mods to rescue me at some point. Is someone standing by????


Spartanatheart, is that you?


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I'm shameless now, I'm nameless now, I'm nothing now, I'm no one now
but my soul must be iron 'cause my fear is naked
I'm naked and fearless
and my fear is naked...
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:31:29 PM EST
Oh what the hell...

IN
When did ignorance become a point of view?
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:36:36 PM EST
Originally Posted By cactoman:
Oh what the hell...

IN


With or without lube?
"If I had sheep I wouldn't need lotion.." Fat_McNasty Oct 2009

"Crap! I forgot." - Deej86 Oct 2007
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:36:52 PM EST
Waiting for SYSTEM MESSAGE lulz.
" I've come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass.......and I'm all out of bubblegum."
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:38:33 PM EST
Originally Posted By Harvster:
Waiting for SYSTEM MESSAGE lulz.


You too?
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:38:54 PM EST
IS ANYONE ELSE PAYING ATTENTION TO SOME OF THE USER NAMES IN THIS THREAD?????

DDiggler
LinggrrLonggrr

LOL...names full of WIN for this thread
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:41:50 PM EST
IBTL
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Posted: 12/14/2009 12:44:36 PM EST
IBTL - In Before The Lock

or

IBTL - In Before The Lube

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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:02:36 PM EST
Don't waste your money on lube when you don't have to. All you need to do is tape a picture of a good looking guy over your face so she stays horny for more than a minute or so.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:07:06 PM EST
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:24:35 PM EST
This will not end well.....
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:28:36 PM EST
Originally Posted By the_ak_kid:
Astroglide.



Seriously.



+1 - that stuff rocks
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:33:45 PM EST
Originally Posted By CBcap:
Screwing for 13 hours, huh? Scratch my previous suggestion. You need to install grease zerks, and coat with NeverSeize.

What torque spec are you using?


Why, the one that busts a nut of course!
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:35:52 PM EST
Originally Posted By Zhukov:

Originally Posted By Lootie23:
Originally Posted By Zhukov:
Is this a pathetic attempt to display your male prowess? Can a woman even maintain natural lubrication for that long?

I know this is Arfcom and all, where all guys actively hump their women for 3 hours straight without stopping, but seriously...


Dude, I said 30 minutes not 3 hours. And if a woman could maintain natural lube that long I wouldn't be asking.

Just saying:

Dr. Irwin Goldstein, editor of the Journal of Sexual Medicine, cited afour-week study of 1,500 couples in 2005 that found the median time forsexual intercourse was 7.3 minutes. (Women were armed with stopwatches.)

Source

It says the optimal time is 3 to 13 minutes. God willing, I'll eventually make those extra two minutes and I'll be on the low end of the optimal scale.






"Grief is a hone to a hard mind." --J.R.R. Tolkein

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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:37:35 PM EST
Dude.......

Alabama: That the great, general and essential principles of liberty and free government may be recognized and established, we declare....That every citizen has a right to bear arms in defense of himself and the state. (Art. I, § 26)
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:40:45 PM EST
http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/8735/31gte5huwplsl500aa280.jpg + http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/3025/ropespool.jpg + http://img687.imageshack.us/img687/4733/orangef.jpg = http://img697.imageshack.us/img697/5285/58551345.jpg
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Posted: 12/14/2009 1:50:12 PM EST
Originally Posted By Zhukov:


The Zima on your shopping list should have been the first clue.


ZIMA!
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:05:18 PM EST
[Last Edit: 12/14/2009 2:06:44 PM EST by popnfresh]
Ideal ClearGlide® Wire Pulling Lubricant $5 a quart at Lowes, same as water based "personal lubricants"

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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:06:35 PM EST
Originally Posted By mcnielsen:
Militec-1 ZMax will embed itself in your penis and make it permanently more lubricated.









This only works, unfortunately, if your penis is made of steel.


"The only failure of Liberty is that it does not automatically bestow honor, good character, self-discipline and personal responsibility upon its owner."
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:07:01 PM EST
in
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:13:40 PM EST
If shes drying up on you, you're doin it wrong
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:16:16 PM EST
Mobile 1
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:23:32 PM EST

I thought this thread was about wheel bearing grease that didn't catch on fire...

Refute Beck's research, expose his facts, do ANYTHING but sit there on your fuckin' fat ass and arm-chair quarterback a guy who is at war on our behalf. - Redhead Infidel
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:31:15 PM EST
Apply the lube before all of the parts are rubbed raw to prevent burning.


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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:35:25 PM EST
Anything more than 2-4 minutes is just showing off.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:38:31 PM EST
In!!! Potentially epic here.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:45:18 PM EST
Originally Posted By Pro-Hunt:
Don't waste your money on lube when you don't have to. All you need to do is tape a picture of a good looking guy over your face so she stays horny for more than a minute or so.


Dude, that hurts.
When did ignorance become a point of view?
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:48:06 PM EST
Originally Posted By Lootie23:
Originally Posted By Pro-Hunt:
Don't waste your money on lube when you don't have to. All you need to do is tape a picture of a good looking guy over your face so she stays horny for more than a minute or so.


Dude, that hurts.


Worse than a road rashed johnson?
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Don't tax me bro!
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:49:04 PM EST
Originally Posted By Jeff4187:
Anything more than 2-4 minutes is just showing off.


I am merely giving you a warning. Those who wish to deal with me, must do so on my terms or not at all. I do not make terms with incompetence.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:49:27 PM EST
As bad as carpet burn.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:52:14 PM EST
Slippery Stuff
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:53:18 PM EST
Okay, I've got some ideas now. Thanks guys. Nothing more to see here. We can let this die before night crew gets a hold of it. pls?
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:53:49 PM EST
Originally Posted By andrasik:
Originally Posted By Jeff4187:
Anything more than 2-4 minutes is just showing off.




WTF, that's the same face my wife makes when I say that to her.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:56:54 PM EST
[Last Edit: 12/14/2009 5:46:33 PM EST by Bob243]


Mix the following

Beeswax 2 oz.
Castor Oil 8 oz.
Murphy's Oil Soap 1 oz.


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Posted: 12/14/2009 2:57:36 PM EST
Willy: What the hell you need ball bearings for?
Fletch: Awww, come on guys, it's so simple. Maybe you need a refresher course.
Fletch: Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valve with some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads. And I'm gonna need 'bout ten quarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No, no make that Quaker State.
Either run for your lives, surrender, or stand up and fight...
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:05:28 PM EST

Originally Posted By GLOCKshooter:
Willy:What the hell you need ball bearings for?
Fletch:Awww, come on guys, it's so simple. Maybe you need a refresher course.
Fletch:Hey! It's all ball bearings nowadays. Now you prepare that Fetzer valvewith some 3-in-1 oil and some gauze pads. And I'm gonna need 'bout tenquarts of anti-freeze, preferably Prestone. No, no make that QuakerState.

I had a friend who said that aaaaaaaaaaallllll the time. I could never place what movie it was and he couldn't even remember, lol.
"Al-taqiyya" means that no non-Muslim can believe anything told to them by any Muslim. For that Muslim to lie to you counts as a 'good work' to gain salvation.

Originally Posted By Subnet:
"At this point, I'd take one from StonerS
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:08:11 PM EST
have yourself powder coated
Now remember, things look bad and it looks like you're not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean.
I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That's just the way it is.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:08:27 PM EST
Rub your stick with bacon.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:10:03 PM EST
[Last Edit: 12/14/2009 4:11:44 PM EST by Couch-Commando]

Originally Posted By Lootie23:
Sometimes after 30 minutes or so, friction burns start to come on. The KY seems to leave a burning sensation on the sides of the penis, mostly at the base, making sex uncomfortable. Anyone use anything that doesn't burn like fire?

I live with the burn. Still more pleasant than going without the lube.

ETA: I think it's a lube inside the condom issue. I put lube in the condom. If I don't, it's painful. My GF takes care of the rest.
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"Silly boy, tits are for kids!" -My GF.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:13:14 PM EST
Actually this stuff is good Gun oil they have both silicone and water based versions.

OR

If you believe every thig is better with bacon

LINK
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:15:55 PM EST
mix lube with some cocoa butter.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:28:02 PM EST
[Last Edit: 12/14/2009 4:29:22 PM EST by kap_x]
Just get a turkey baster or one of those ear-cleaning bulbs and fill it with astroglide.
After a while, give it a squirt and keep on going.
Use a 12ga shell to plug yourself up if you start leaking after the switch-off
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:35:29 PM EST
[Last Edit: 12/14/2009 4:36:53 PM EST by WayneD]
Buy in quantity.......

Striving to be the man my dog thinks I am.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:39:06 PM EST
Originally Posted By Lootie23:
Okay, I've got some ideas now. Thanks guys. Nothing more to see here. We can let this die before night crew gets a hold of it. pls?




Originally Posted By Jarhead_22:
When TexRdnec is the voice of moderation, you know you have swerved over the double yellow line and are headed into oncoming traffic.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 4:42:38 PM EST
"Just get a turkey baster..."

I couldn't read any more after this!

EPIC WIN
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Posted: 12/14/2009 5:04:19 PM EST

I needed this laugh tonight.
צבאות
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Posted: 12/14/2009 5:07:16 PM EST


I see the anal lube is right after the Zima, just like in real life!

OP: Astroglide
Well-behaved women rarely make history.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing; drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 5:13:23 PM EST

Originally Posted By Zhukov:

Originally Posted By Lootie23:
Originally Posted By Zhukov:
Is this a pathetic attempt to display your male prowess? Can a woman even maintain natural lubrication for that long?

I know this is Arfcom and all, where all guys actively hump their women for 3 hours straight without stopping, but seriously...


Dude, I said 30 minutes not 3 hours. And if a woman could maintain natural lube that long I wouldn't be asking.

Just saying:

Dr. Irwin Goldstein, editor of the Journal of Sexual Medicine, cited afour-week study of 1,500 couples in 2005 that found the median time forsexual intercourse was 7.3 minutes. (Women were armed with stopwatches.)

Source

It says the optimal time is 3 to 13 minutes. God willing, I'll eventually make those extra two minutes and I'll be on the low end of the optimal scale.


http://sexuality.about.com/od/anatomyresponse/a/average_penis.htm


Then you'll just need to work on those extra 2" and you'll be golden!
Well-behaved women rarely make history.

A little knowledge is a dangerous thing; drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring.
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Posted: 12/14/2009 5:20:20 PM EST
what the hell, IBTL

I got kicked out of recess, 'cause I don't play!
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Bronze
  • Team Member
  • Jan 2006
  • USA OH, USA
Bronze
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  • Jan 2006
  • USA OH, USA
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Posted: 12/14/2009 5:23:56 PM EST
I made it!
WHAT NOW?

2nd BN, D Co., Plt. 2025, 4/4/88

Charlie don't surf! And neither does Mohammed!
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