Thanks to everyone for their input on my recent topic dealing with the testing of my new body armour. Except for a few negative replys and an incident of name-calling ( a direct violation of board rules,BTW ), the mainly positive  responses encouraged my wife to be the test subject.  [url]www.ar15.com/forums/topic.html?id=31931[/url]
First let me say that she is my 3rd wife, and that has been the charm. She has given me 6 kids in 6 years, most of which have been mine. I would never intentionally harm her.
We first covered her chest with a piece of Tyvek R19 insulation material with an ace bandage to prevent bruising, before she put on the vest. I also had her wear my Peltor shooting muffs to prevent acoustic trauma from the direct muzzle blasts.
She was instructed to try to hit me with a semi auto paintball pistol after impact.
The test was in 3 caliber phases, 32acp, 38 Special, and 45acp.
The 32acp was child's play. she was easily able to direct fire in my direction with the paintball gun,but she missed because she's a poor shot.
The 38 Special was more difficult. She started complaining of a stinging sensation after impact, so I curtailed it after 3 rounds fired.
She did manage to tag me in the forehead with a paintball at that stage, but it was probably a fluke, and reminded me I should be wearing eye protection.
We had problems at the 45acp stage. I didn't want to hit the same spot twice, so I aimed for a clear area in the right upper quadrant. I should have factored in her current weight, which is only 89 pounds due to an eating disorder she has been battling. When she was hit with the 230 grain slug she spun like one of those Jewish tops and fell to the ground. This ended the experiment.
I have to admit she's very mad at me because I told her it wouldn't hurt, and despite the Tyvek, she has a hell of a bruise above her right breast and possibly a fractured rib because it crackles when she sneezes. I offered to let her test her 500,000 volt stun gun on me, but this only brightened her face a little bit.
Now I'm sorry I listened to you people who encouraged me...

                     [whacko][heavy]

This is a perfect example for why people should use birth control.

I knew this was a scam/joke from the
beginning

 [frag]

"I knew this was a scam/joke from the
beginning "




Pretty good Imagination [kill]

If you really did do that, you are one stupid son of a bitch.

OH YEAH?? Again with the name calling!!!

Two can play this game, Liverlips!!
I doubt you're even a real captain..

The 'results' are even funnier than the original post. [:D][:D][:D][:D][:D][:D][:D]

I think I busted a rib laughing so hard. [BD]

If this is a joke.......NOT funny.

If this is NOT a joke....NOT funny.  Seriously NOT Funny.

I love it. "She has given me 6 kids in 6 years, most of which have been mine." ..... "When she was hit with the 230 grain slug she spun like one of those Jewish tops and fell to the ground."

People are looking at me wierd cause I won't stop laughing. (In the school's computer lab presently)

You remind me of my 9th grade English teacher. She sucked too..

"I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so what the hell- I threw up." :^)

Does somebody have the URL for the Shopping Mall Ninja thread that was on GlockTalk a while back? I think I see a LOT of similarities in Mole Eye's and gecko45's writing.... <:^O

Lighten up Beagles.

But in answer to your question, I will have to get a new vest. Only an idiot would trust a used one..

Q:What's that smell?
A: I think it is Bullshit sir!
[whacko]
[sniper]

Thank you, JLA, you too are a gentleman. All too rare amongst this generally questionable crew.

This has been a curious thread.  Assuming it's true, it's a little strange that you actually seem offended by some of the name calling.  You expected something different?  Your last statement "Now I'm sorry I listened to you people who encouraged me" would seem to indicate that you consider the experiment ill-advised and regret conducting it.  Later posts seem to contradict this.  In any case, I think it's fair to say that any future posts from anyone using the handle "Mole Eye" will be lacking in credibility.

P.S.  Your wife has ribs above her right breast?  Odd....

First i will say you are an idiot for shooting your wife... IMHO.

One does not have ribs above their right breast... unless you meant her collar bone.

There are quite a few ribs above the right breast...


Unless they are REALLY perky.

I don't know if I should laugh or nominate you for the STUPID award.

I think just for AR15.com you should shoot her in the vest with a AR15 with a beta C-mag and a drop in auto sear or a LAW launcher with a HEAT missile. [frag] [rocket]

Uh.....guys?

Is there any question that MOLE EYE IS JUST KIDDING?????


Man, some guys are so dense!!!


BTW,  how is #4 child doing?   He is mine after all.


Balming

Mole Eye,
I was more than half way through your post before I cottoned-on that it was satirical, but I have a reason for being so slow. Back when I was a rookie "poe'lease" and still in the academy, one of my classmates was a "rich kid" in every sense of the phrase. His father owned a large car dealership, and he drove a different new Chev. or Honda almost everyday,or if he wasn't in a new car, he rode his chopper wearing a spiked german helmet. He graduated from either the Citadel or VMI, but he never went into the military. He also had a drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend. Was I envious to a degree? Heck yea!
Anyway, this guy was later fired because while drinking with some of his buddys, he let them shoot him in the chest with his department's 40cal. while he was wearing the department's vest.
This guy was a riot to be around, but man! sometimes he was way-out-there.

Mole Eye, you're my new hero.  Nobody else has made me laugh this hard, this early in the morning.  

McUzi, you're now in second place.  Get workin' on it.

Norm

Hey  that was really funny....Hey sweetheart come and read this funny post..........

 [pissed]  Ouch , hey stop that, owww, ouch, baby, baby, put that vase down.........

THANK YOU,Balming! Some folks don't even know where RIBS are, for God's sake. ( hint: feel the bony things between your right nipple and your collarbone).

Are you sure about the 4th child?
He looks to be half black..

Mole eye -

I have a fireproof Greg Louganis style "grape smuggler" bathing suit I'd like to market.

Would you safety test it for me????

[}:D]

I don't know what I am laughing harder at: Mole Eye's thread or the complete morons who think he was serious.

I'll second that!

Mole Eye, should you decide to repeat your experiment, as all good scientists should do before they accept the results as valid, consider this: should you wear the vest and allow your wife to do the shooting, better get the bullet proof groin protector, you'll need it bud!

Yup, the fact that a surprising number of guys fell for this  thread and actually may own firearms is a bit of a scare...

Another one for AR15.com Classics

Someone IS keeping up with all these treasures?

Right?

Actually it's not that surprising.  In fact, the stupid things that people do for real shouldn't surprise you.  Have you read the thread about strange range incidents?  Now unless those people were lying, some really stupid happenings were recounted.  Remember the idiot right next to the target illuminating it for his buddy?  Hell, I got a guy who insists he routinely goes 60% over max on his handgun ammo (11.2gr AA#5 115gr JHP 9mm).

That people believe the unbelievable shouldn't scare you.  That people actually do the unbelievable is what ought to scare you.

That sounds... Distasteful, Garandman..