What warning signs did you see that first tipped you off and what age was the diagnosis?


I'm starting to think my 4yo son may be showing some.

I have AS

Around 4-5.

Aspergers has gone away, it now falls under autism spectrum as per the doc who performed the tests.


Inappropriate reactions To social situations. Lack of sensitivity to nonverbal cues
Inflexible in play and thought.
Sensitivity to Loud noises



My daughter is very high functioning. Her teachers and friends don't know. We've spent a small fortune on specialized counseling to keep it that way. She also scored 99.7th percentile on her cognitive testing, which is a blessing and a curse at tHe same time.

Can you give me some examples to the nonverbal cues and inflexible in thought examples?

Maybe even the social situations one.

Like was your child just quiet and introverted, or something far different?

When I was a little kid, I came in the house,  one day, and told my mother "I don't want to play with those kids any more, they make too much noise."

It's probably a good thing for me that it was so many years ago that nobody whistled up a team of psychologists, social workers, counselors, and so on to "treat" me.

Also, feel free to Message me if you don't want to respond on the forum.

Does he have trouble with social situations? (recognizing body language etc.) I had trouble with that until I was in 8th grade.

lack of eye contact is a big sign.

Some day people will come to the conclusion that not everyone has to be the same to be deemed "normal".

I'd say in social situations he doesn't really talk to people. He kind of shrugs shoulders and makes weird faces. He'll talk to me and my wife and his sister and maybe other familiar relatives, but like with relatives he doesn't know he gets a little weird. I chalked it up to shyness but its one of the things that makes me wonder.

Around age 4 or 5.  It was an uphill battle to get a doctor to diagnose her as Autistic because of all the parental abuse of the system, but since my daughter IS, the doctor DID.

She has a little half sister who is quite advanced mentally for her age, and who has been a huge boon in socializing and helping my Autistic daughter advance in studies (sibling rivalry!).

Right now she's 10 with the mentality of an 8 year old.

Two years ago she was 8 with the mentality of a 4 year old.  

We're on track, per her doctor and school staff, for her to be either fully mission capable or at least highly socialized and high order Aspergers by the time she's in her mid teens.

Good luck, OP.

How does he interact with kids his own age he does'nt know?

Let me get home to a computer so I don't have to type on the phone. My kid isn't the least bit shy.

He'll play near them but won't talk to them. He may run with them, jump, etc but not socialize. Maybe giggle or scream like a dinosaur (which my daughter will do too, and usually the kids will). As far as the "give and take", I'm not really seeing that with his peer play. He may do it with me sometimes.

Probably one of the biggest things is a lack of empathy. My 3yo daughter is full of it, the boy-not really at all.

Is parallel play still found in four-year-olds?

A few years ago, a female co-worker was talking about her autistic child and  Asperger's.

I was driving home from work that morning and it dawned on me that my 26 year old son
had Aspergers.

When he was a baby/ toddler, he would always play by himself and never came to us for a
hug and things like that.

Growing up, he would do well in school in things that he liked and sucked at things he didn't
like. He was always socially awkward and never seamed the be developed to the level of his peers.

He was born in 1986 and Aspergers wasn't an official diagnoses until 1991.

btw, I have been a nurse since 1991.

My nephew's son has it. He was scary but he has had really really really bad parents.





Deleted rant.




He is a history savant and loves to read about and visit historic places. He has a photographic memory of things he likes and no memory of ones he doesn't.  

Very sensitive to light and loud sounds. Did not make friends easily. Very little impulse control. PM if you want to talk.

I noticed when my son was 3 to 8 ish that he talked  in third person and only had a very
few friends.

He would draw the family with stick figures with hairdos sizes skirts for
females and such but always drew himself as a ninja turtle.

He never seemed to be close to anybody and played around others at that age.

Don't get cought up in the label.

Humor is another thing aspergers kids often have trouble with.

What kind of humor?  When my wife makes jokes they're usually really bad and I don't find them funny.  Maybe I'm an aspie?

Quite a bit of "funny" is indistinguishable from "stupid".

Eye contact needs to be said again.. Most will never be able to maintain it no matter how "normal" they may get. A piercing stare will make most people uncomfortable, for people on the spectrum it is a thousand times worse.

Toe walking, hand flapping, lining objects up are signs along with lack of empathy.

OP, if you suspect this please don't wait to get it checked out. Early intervention is very important.

Being able to tell a joke or recognize when someone else is.

My son has Asperger's and I don't care that the "big book of mental issue diagnosis Volume 4" has removed Asperger's specifically and assigned it to broad spectrum Autism. It's crap but that's my opinion.

OP, it's kind of difficult to explain and describe. I want to say it's kind of like watching Brent Spiner as Commander Data on Star Trek The Next Generation trying to act like a robot that's acting like a human... sort of.

My son is 15 now. He doesn't make eye contact a lot when speaking with people. He's awkward socially but doesn't really appear to have anything wrong with him when you see him by himself. Put him in a group of other kids with Asperger's and then you can plainly tell that there's something not right about them. I'd say it's kind of jerky movements... in their arms, legs, turning their heads... not smooth and fluid like normal people. He's very animated when he speaks... uses a lot of hand and arm movements... but it's like he doesn't know quite what to do with them.

He's very, very, very, very, very interested in specific things. Like laser focus. Initially it was power lines. Telephone poles had some sort of fascination to him and he knew each and every one on the side of the road to and from his school and the neighborhood. Power lines. He knew which ones the power company replaced and which ones weren't.

Lights. OH. MY. GOD. Lights. We would walk into a store. Target. WalMart. Supermarket. It didn't matter. Before we were even through the door, he had identified each and every fluorescent light fixture that had a problem and would worry about them the entire time we were in the store. "There's a light out there dad." "Yep." "Someone needs to fix it." "Yep." "When do you think they'll fix it?" "Whenever." "But the light's out. It needs to be changed." "They know it's out and they'll fix it when they're able to. Don't worry about it. It's not hurting you so leave it be." After years of this, he finally doesn't worry about lights in stores. At least he doesn't talk about it anymore. Maybe he worries about them still (probably) but keeps it to himself.

He was a human GPS in that he knew roads extremely well and where we were in relation to that road... "oh, we're right here. 3 miles down from Smith street."

He's very, very, very, very, very interested in weather. To the point that it is annoying and he knows I will not speak about weather to him much at all.

I've found that there are 2 kinds of Asperger's kids. Truth tellers and liars. The truth tellers are brutal in their honesty and you wonder if there's a filter that they simply don't have... "Dad, why does that woman have a moustache?" kind of brutal honesty. In public. Embarrassing to say the least but I can only imagine... my son is the opposite side of the coin and he's a liar. It is extremely difficult to get the truth out of him without serious effort. He lies for whatever reason. Maybe he's wired that way, I don't know. It's annoying. Just tell the truth. You know how. You know right from wrong. He doesn't though. Getting the truth from him involves dealing very closely with his teachers at school. I know what he's doing every day, when his homework is due, what his homework is, and all of the teachers know who he is and look out for him. And keep him in line. And knowing his tells when he lies. (Looking down and to the right. Using UM a lot.)

He didn't used to handle change well at all. At all. AT ALL. Like if something changed, he went into a screaming meltdown, temper tantrum, inconsolable, MY GOD what's wrong with my son fit. Over all kinds of things.... but he's getting better. As he matures he's improving. Severe structure early in his school life helped immensely. Not severe like "do what you're told or you'll be beaten!" severe... more like, "this is what we are doing today. Step 1. Step 2. Step 3. Step 4..." things were scheduled out and he thrived under the programs and additional attention that a helper teacher was able to provide. It didn't hurt that he's a loveable kid with a lot of compassion. But structure seemed to help him A LOT!!!

He's a master manipulator. I don't know if that's Asperger's or just something that runs in the family because I'm a manipulator too... as is my mom. So... maybe not a sign of Asperger's.

He doesn't get sarcasm. At all. Example: I'll say something sarcastic. My wife gets it but my son doesn't... he'll think on it a second or so and say "that was sarcasm wasn't it?" He tries using it himself and his efforts are admirable but not always successful.



He's been diagnosed as Asperger's for the past several years. He went to a specialist.

For a while when he was very young, it was like he was normal... up until about the age of 5 or so. He had just received a vaccination (yeah, I'm not a truther or anything) and seemed to change. I honestly can't remember and his mom died before he got the shot so she can't  corroborate my story whether he was like this before but I don't think so. Initially I took my son to the doc to see about getting him some meds because he seemed to be ADD or ADHD. He was diagnosed as ADHD... I paid out of pocket to get him into see a preeminent child psychologist. She diagnosed him as ADHD inattentive, having dysgraphia, and recommended a doc to take him to for post diagnosis treatment. He went on meds for that... then meds for the side effects of the first med (he wouldn't sleep. days without sleep until his body exhausted and he crashed and slept. He would lie in bed all night and not move but not sleep. He wound up with pneumonia a few times because he exhausted his immune system to the point of exhaustion and wouldn't tell me that he was getting sick)... then meds for the side effects of that which wound up with him picking at his skin until it bled in various spots... then meds to try to stop that. Finally we took him off of all meds. He's sleeping through the night, focusing more in school (with some help), not picking, and acting normal at times...

Then there are the times when it seems like he's a 9 yo trapped in a 15 yo body.

He would much rather interact with someone much younger than he is or someone much older than he is (adults). It's how he's been since his diagnosis although he is showing that he has friends at school so that's very encouraging.

There's nothing that can be done right now (medically) to treat Asperger's. Describing it for me is very difficult because it's hard to separate between normal 15 yo kid behavior and Asperger's behavior... it's normal now and has been for my household for several years to the point I just see it as my son and not Asperger's.

Good luck and if you pursue a diagnosis for your child, there's not really a stigma associated with it. It's really just social awkwardness but so much of our interaction in life is visual and Aspie's can't process the visuals the same way we do. They're just wired differently. If you find that your child has Asperger's, there may be a school in your district that gathers all of the Asperger's kids and has programs that help them. We tried using the resources at the middle school for my son but he exhausted the staff... he had 13 disciplinary write-ups in the 6th grade and 37 in the 7th grade. He went into the program at the local middle school that had the autism program and he had 0 write ups. This is his second year in the program and he's only improving. (fingers crossed). If only we had known about this program when he was in the 6th grade we would have fought to get him into it. He's mainstreamed and does not take special classes. My son's 504 plan was just reviewed and there were fewer accommodations that he required. All in thanks to the efforts of the teachers in his school, our insistence that he be treated like any other child (he's not special just because he's autistic) and keeping a united front at school and at home. School knows what's going on at home. Home knows what's going on at school. My son doesn't get to run off the chain at his grandparents house (they let him run wild and it would take days for us to get him back to normal after him being there overnight...)

Make sure you have an IEP or 504 plan for your child and any accommodations that must be made for them to learn. Be your child's advocate. You're the one most interested in their welfare and health.


Oh yeah. My son has empathy. Loads of it. But he's not very affectionate. Trying to get a hug from him is like pulling teeth... or at least it was last year and the previous years. Now he's more willing to give hugs... occasionally.

And my son might be sensitive to sound... but we tell him to suck it up buttercup. Rub some dirt in it and keep going. He tends to be somewhat dramatic in a lot of things. Just like his sister. She's 10 years older and I'm sure would test positive for Asperger's.

My youngest has it.

Very sensitive to light and sound.

He tries to be social but other kids don't wanna have much to do with him since he acts different than they do.

My oldest who is 13 now.  loud noises was the biggest sign.  He also would play with other kids but was standoffish doing his own thing.   He has to have a schedule, springing things on him always had a very nervous reaction.  OP feel free to contact me through and we can chat over the phone if you want.  

With lots of counseling and consciences he is doing alright.  Now I just have to get through the teenage years

Interesting thread.  I wonder, is this more common now for some reason, or has it always been around at this rate but we can just identify it now?

If it is more common now, I wonder what the cause is?  People having kids later in life?  Or maybe the way social interactions happen nowadays or something?

Yeah...I'm in that boat too. I rarely find others jokes funny, and the shit I find hilarious usually just makes people say "thats pretty fucked up dude..."



 

Wow, thanks for all of that good information.
As I read through I'm asking myself, do I experience that with my boy?
There's hints of some of those traits in him, but nothing that really stands out as a smoking gun.  

Keep the dialog going, this is very helpful, probably just because of the huge variety of traits, presented or not.

That could be me. While my machinist little brother certainly meets the diagnostic criteria for Asperger's, I only qualify as being an ass

 

Mine has the brutal honestly thing too. He always says what's on his mind without any thought of others feelings.

He once asked an overweight teacher if there was any food left in the cafeteria or did she eat it all...and he was dead serious.

My son was 2 1/2 when diagnosed. He's now 19. Right after the MMR shot he stopped talking. Went from the usual vocab of a toddler to nothing. We first were afraid that he had lost his hearing. Then one day he came running from the other end of the house when he heard the theme to Wheel of Fortune. He was tested by a lady that had worked with Ivar Lovaas at UCLA.

Signs also were fixations. Stemming. Sort of classical autism stuff. I remember that kick in the gut when she told us that he was on the spectrum. In 1996, it felt like a death sentence. We quickly got him in OT and Speech therapy. Started seeing signs of improvement. I can tell you what his first word was "basketball". Sweetest sound I ever heard.

Now he just finished his freshman year in college. He has a 3.0 gpa and is majoring in computer science. He has a drivers license but doesnt like to drive. Is still socially awkward but is otherwise a great kid.

hehe

Son diagnosed by me Age 4, doc age 5!

Odd behavior such as deathly afraid of whipped cream! Other strange food issues.


Noticed his daily life was obsession driven. Mostly based on upcoming movies! 12-13 years later and he's still that way.


Overly sensitive to light and sound! He freaked out bad the first few times we took him to fireworks. Until we figured out the hearing protection trick!


Fire drills at school were a problem for the first few years of school.


Bed wetting! Still on ongoing issue at age 17!


Has a real hard time understanding social norms, and others points of view.

its just so wide spread 10 different kids and none will fit the same set of standards
my nephew loves telling jokes
now they might be pretty random on the timing
but his sarcastic humor is hilarious

euphemisms are a concept he doesn't understand one bit though

THIS! VERY VERY IMPORTANT!

But if diagnosed by all means please provide him/her with the treatment needed.

A guy in our gunclub was in denial when the school contacted them about their girl. Never got treatment and she is all messed up now as an adult.

Wow, didn;t know they got tested and diagnosed at that age. Thought a school school psychologist does it..

OP it doesnt hurt to take him into see a specialist. There are hundreds of thousands of undiagnosed people "higher than normal" on the spectrum and most function in everyday life fine. If you think of the "spectrum" like a graph classical aspergers is the area from just above normal to the end of independent functioning. Thats a big scale, and its not really that simple. Autisitcs usually have issue in being overwhelmed and unable to process non-verbal emotional cues. The lack of eye contact can be because they are uncomfortable with all the sensations they are feeling. At least that much is true for me. there is a paper called "Intense World Theory" it is a diffrent approach to the mechanical causes of autism. It also rectifies problems the classical model had with savant-ism. Autistics tend to be either super interested or completely disinterested in a topic. If your child is autistic he may start repressing his own emotions as a method of control (IWT is based on over stimulation) early diagnosis and help may prevent or alleviate this. If he starts humming or banging his head against the wall in emotionally stressful situations, that is a sign of trying to drown out the external stimuli.  Just remember he is your son and being on the spectrum just means he is different not less. good luck

at the risk of being labeled as ass, in all my years of working with pediatric cases and their parents I think a lot of childhood behavioral issues are bogus diagnosis by pediatricians for numerous reasons.

1- toss a kid in front of a TV with little or no human companionship from an Adult- wahlaaa -social introvert.
2- send a kid to most types of day care with little human companionship from an Adult- wahlaaa -social introvert
3- jack a kid up on 1 lb of sugar every 4 hours.. wahlaa Autism, ADD.. whatever else you label it.
4- show poor discipline to a child.. - see above..

the sad ped cases are the drug and FAS babies. you name it, they have it in real time.

most of my colleagues came to the realization years ago that there was a systematic correlation with daycare ( modern- since 1990), diet and discipline with the increase of childhood behavioral issues. then you have parents who want little Johnny to be special.

the best article in any med journal I have read came to the conclusion that it was like minded people (ie- introverted nerds) mating with like minded people ( Ie- introverted nerds) since many spouses today were meeting their spouses/baby momma/baby daddy on the job.

I realize that there are a lot of kids with problems, but some of their counselors and drs are playing up the latest diagnosis craze in a lot of cases. they don't get paid if you ever get fixed. they need return clients to make the office run. they are also under pressure from public school systems ( and Parents) to increase the numbers or diagnosis for higher daily reimbursement from the .gov for children with disabilities and disorders.

my favorite memory from a Ped Office was this baby momma with 3 kids under 11. they were being Tasmanian Devils in the hallway, she was barking orders left and right with no correction from the kids. I look close, they all had either an Dr Pepper or Mountain Dew in the hand while eating pure sugar ( candy bar to a a ring sucker). the entire time she was telling them they were going to get their meds adjusted.

Feel Better?

I agree with most of what you said

Difficulty making friends

They often ask 'why are you making fun of me' when you are simply explaining how to do something (for instance, trying to teach him/correct him as to how to throw a football).

Inability to understand social cues.  For instance if you and I were in a conversation and I was looking off, rolling my eyes, crossing my arms, tapping my toes you would recognize that I am uninterested in talking to you.  They don't often get that.  Nonverbal cues are completely omitted by them.

Extreme difficulty narrating a story in any fashion that a person trying to listen would understand.

Hyper-focus on certain things like video games and Pokemon.

Definitely get help.  They grow up some and the differences between them and 'normal' kids doesn't stick out as much.  Hopefully by the time they hit college age, they just seem a bit immature, but during late elementary school and middle school it is hell.  Kids sense something different and pounce.  There is no 'fix' for it but a good doc can help with education so that you aren't beating your kid up over something they can't control.

Your "colleagues" in the medical community are making the diagnoses, and distributing Ritalin and other medicines at the light of speed. The medical community is part of the problem.

Or speed of light. Too much caffeine.

Hey a pill is 87x better than diet & excersize

80-85% of your experience sounds like my boy. He just graduated, barely. He's smart as shit but doesn't want to do his work. Aces about all of the tests. Still doesn't have his license & plays with legos & action figures. I know he'll never be able to hold down a job. Kid won't do a damn thing he's told to do. He thinks he's ALWAYS right even when he's dead wrong. Some days I can't even look at him I am so disgusted. It's really hard to love him. He has outbursts of violence when he doesn't get his way or his mom takes one of his toys from him as a punishment. Last time she did that he broke a door out of the frame to get his kindle. I know he has a problem but I am seriously thinking of throwing him out when he's 18 in a few months. I can't handle it anymore

For Team.

http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_75/1749163_Oh_my_God__It_spins______What_it_really_looks_like_.html

My GF has a 20 yr old with Aspergers. He's high functioning (she says) as he has a mild job (mail room) & drives (locally).

What do I need to know?