Married couples, Do you keep all of your money joint or separate? - Page 2

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[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Married couples, Do you keep all of your money joint or separate? (Page 2 of 5)

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:23:46 PM EDT

[#1]

We have some of both. No real reason. When we first got married, there never enough money to worry about anyway. We do have some joint accounts now.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:24:35 PM EDT

[#2]

I prefer the what is your is mine, and what is mine is mine.

In all seriousness we have joint everything, but I am the finance guy of the family.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:32:45 PM EDT

[#3]

Quote History

Quoted:
Combine it or don't be married. If you're married and keep it all separated, you probably won't stay married long. Ask me how I know.

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Most of my friends and family keep their finances seperate.
These are couples going on 20+yrs together.

My wife and I have seperate checkings plus one joint savings we both contribute to.
She is responsible for the mortgage and I get the utilities and cars. Purchases of a couple hundred $ or so get discussed. It's worked out for us so far.

'Course, we've been married less than a year so far...

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:37:52 PM EDT

[#4]

Pretty much the same as several here... We have our "main" account that all our household expenses come out of (mortgage, food, utilities, fuel, etc.).. then we each have our own "personal money" accounts. I use mine for guns, reloading stuff, etc. She also has an account she uses for her pleasures in life (hair, nails, etc..). She's free to look at what I have in my "personal" account any time she likes, and likewise me looking at hers.

Someone mentioned above being like "roommates". I had a buddy that his and his wife's finances were like this... "You pay this, I pay that".. getting the other to help w/ the others "assigned" bill, was like taking a damn loan at a bank.

They lasted about 4yrs.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:39:03 PM EDT

[#5]

My 40th Anniversary is coming up soon. We have never argued about money. She knows , signs and understands EVERYTHING about our finances. I would have it no other way.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:44:37 PM EDT

[#6]

Lots of joint accounts meaning we both have access but she doesnt touch mine and i dont touch hers. I dont even know how much she has and she certainly doesnt know what i have. I handle all the bills and she does whatever. works for me since she cant tell me no and i get what i want. Lol.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:46:26 PM EDT

[#7]

Separate accounts. Together 15 years. Lol at all the bullshit about trust, etc.

We both make good money and have divided the bills fairly. We TRUST each other enough to have different accounts.

Do what works for you.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:47:14 PM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
I have married friends who keep their money separate and some even to the extent that one does not know how much money the other has. I think it is counter productive for a marriage and seems to point toward someone being unsure about the solidity of the relationship. What does ARFCOM think? Poll inbound.

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Why no option for joint account/noproblems?

While we still have our accounts from before we were married 11 years ago, all our money since we were married goes in to the joint checking account.

Posted: 4/19/2015 2:51:52 PM EDT

[#9]

Both, we got married at 30 - so we were both set in our ways of having accounts and we did both have substantial assets.

We both have private checking accounts as well as shared joint accounts for household and our child.

Works well, to each their own.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:00:35 PM EDT

[#10]

Not married, but I'd like to think that if I were it'd be a joint account and we each get an allowance to with as we each please. So she could start her own separate account to save money to buy me expensive toys, pay for her divorce attorney, or whatever.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:02:02 PM EDT

[#11]

Somebody needs to re-explain the concept of marriage to some of you guys.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:03:56 PM EDT

[#12]

After almost 28 years, it would be kinda hard to keep things separate. Most of our stuff is joint, if it's not joint (IRA) then, we are each others benes.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:05:24 PM EDT

[#13]

Joint account

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:08:37 PM EDT

[#14]

3 accounts

1 for bills

1 each for personal use

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:10:49 PM EDT

[#15]

She has her job, and her accounts. I have my jobs, and my accounts. I make quite a bit more than she does, but I'm still pretty poor. I pay for the house and utilities. She pays for the food, appliances, and internet. We can do whatever we want with the money that's left over from our paychecks.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:13:47 PM EDT

[#16]

Joint, except IRAs and 401(k)s which have to be separate.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:14:56 PM EDT

[#17]

joint. we have accounts that pre date marriage and just put each other on them. it makes things easier. If i didn't trust her with that I wouldn't marry her.

that said I understand guys on second marriage or whatever with lots of assets wanting to make sure kids are covered etc.

whatever works.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:15:23 PM EDT

[#18]

I have all of our money in one account. I really don't see the point in being married if I can't trust her that far.

I don't see the big deal - everyone has a system. Some work it better separate than together. It's all good.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:16:29 PM EDT

[#19]

Joint accounts but I do have a coffee fund account (allowance so to speak) of $50 a month that goes toward my Starbucks habit and gun/cycling toys. Bought the parts for my last AR build by scrounging my coffee fund account.

Meh, that is enough junk money for me and I don't have to answer to where it gets spent.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:17:10 PM EDT

[#20]

You forgot

"Together, because we are married and it should not cause any problems"

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:18:13 PM EDT

[#21]

Married 18 years.....seperate accounts the entire time with no issues. I pay these bills, she pays those bills....all is well.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:18:41 PM EDT

[#22]

Quote History

Quoted:
Joint, wtf is the point otherwise?

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Some guys think they can squirrel some away "just in case". It's stupid.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:19:38 PM EDT

[#23]

Quoted:
I have married friends who keep their money separate and some even to the extent that one does not know how much money the other has. I think it is counter productive for a marriage and seems to point toward someone being unsure about the solidity of the relationship. What does ARFCOM think? Poll inbound.

View Quote

Separation of accounts tends to breed communication about finances, trust, and cooperation.

Whereas if you have a joint account and no personal finances, one party can lord over the other, with very little "buffer."

I wouldn't mind having a joint account, but.....there is no way in fucking hell that I'm going to only have a joint account. I refuse to give up my personal discretionary funds.

IMHO, joint accounts should be for "bills" that are incurred as a couple: Cars, house, insurance, bla. Add in the savings account that is more financially viable as a joint account....but discretionary funds should remain separate. It's too clumsy otherwise (because these funds may not be spent in predictable ways, having separate accounts that you are personally aware of in real time reduces overdrafts). Especially if you are on a budget.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:20:57 PM EDT

[#24]

We both got married later in life. She's got 2 kids from a previous marriage.

Initially, we got a joint account. It was a fucking nightmare. You see, my wife has a mentality of " I want it, and I want it NOW!!". I am the exact opposite. Her thoughts..." Oh, we're going to be cutting it close until payday... I'm going to get my nails, toes and hair colored!!"

We've come up with a "house" account, which we both add money to. All bills, mortgage, kids expense, groceries, etc comes out of. The rest is hers to blow, and I've got my mad money too.

It's worked out beautifully.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:23:16 PM EDT

[#25]

Quote History

Quoted:
We have something like five different checking accounts. The Mrs manages all of them.

<----makes all the money.

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This. But all of my accounts are business accounts. I own and operate my specialty demolition company. My wife owns and operates a domestic engineering company.

I have one personal checking. My wife manages all of the household moneys. I deposit a set amount in the account every month. She pinches pennies pretty good.

It has worked very well. Better than 12 years married. She hides a little money to buy me stuff. Maybe $50-400 is in a coffee can somewhere. I hide money to buy her flowers, gifts, and furniture. I have maybe $300 hidden right now. From time to time she steals money to shop, and begs for forgiveness for spending it (maybe $75). I punish her by making her model it for me. From time to time, I steal a little money to buy another small part for an AR, or I'll buy my son another .22.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:23:17 PM EDT

[#26]

TRS retirement, 401, annuities, - joint account. Her part time fun job goes for her quilt hobby, my side work goes for gun stuff & tools. Unless we decide to pool the side money for something extra for the house

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:23:36 PM EDT

[#27]

Married 40+ years with three accounts.

Her's, mine, and ours.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:26:05 PM EDT

[#28]

Joint for all work income. My side buying/Selling money(If I sell a gun I keep the money until I get another) I keep at home. Easier to track my toy spending.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:34:20 PM EDT

[#29]

one of my friends and his wife have separate accounts and it causes problems. His wife doesn't help pay her half of the bills all the time and when she does loan him some money to make a purchase(that a lot of times she wants also)she makes sure to tell the whole world that she paid for it. IMO the main account should be joint and if each spouse wants a separate account for fun money that's fine also as longs as the accounts aren't hidden.

My wife and I have one joint account and we have no problems. If one of us gets a bonus check then we keep that money for ourselves to do whatever with, unless we have an unexpected bill that we need the money for.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:35:33 PM EDT

[#30]

We are a union, it's all together.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:40:22 PM EDT

[#31]

We've had a joint account since we moved in together. She's good with money, I am good at spending money. When I get out of control, I hear about it before it gets too out of control. That's not to say I haven't thrown down with some manly spending. Like the weekend after we got back from our honeymoon, I got up early one morning and she asked where I was headed. Told her I was going to get my motorcycle. "But I thought we were gonna talk about it!" Heh, we had been talking about it for like a month-when I got back from the honeymoon, I was getting a motorcycle.

The one that ended me up in the doghouse, though, was when I went to the bike shop to swap out some parts (they gave me the wrong brake pads) and as I left the house I heard "Don't you dare come home with a new goddamn bike!"

Cost me 3 days on the couch, but man that SV was awesome...

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:41:49 PM EDT

[#32]

Joint. My money is her's a vice-versa.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:44:15 PM EDT

[#33]

Quote History

Quoted:
My wife doesn't work, so there's nothing to separate. Plus, since my wife doesnt work, there's nothing to separate.

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Same. Even when she did work we didn't separate.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:44:16 PM EDT

[#34]

I have mine, she has hers and we have ours.

Posted: 4/19/2015 3:48:57 PM EDT

[#35]

Married, joint accounts, I hate it. I think soon we'll be transitioning to separate accounts.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:01:26 PM EDT

[#36]

Individual accounts but all accounts have both names in case of a emergency

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:02:10 PM EDT

[#37]

I won't judge, but if you don't have all your money in a joint account with your wife, you don't love her. And she doesn't love you either.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:02:37 PM EDT

[#38]

Our money goes into the same pot.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:04:21 PM EDT

[#39]

Poll FAIL.

What's mine is ours and what's hers is hers.

Two accounts... I quit watching hers a long time ago.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:04:32 PM EDT

[#40]

Quote History

Quoted:
Somebody needs to re-explain the concept of marriage to some of you guys.

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Yep, after reading some of the things here it's no wonder there is the so called ARF curse.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:06:38 PM EDT

[#41]

In a no-fault community property state, it doesn't matter.

Posted: 4/19/2015 4:08:59 PM EDT

[#42]

Separate, so she can't complain about the 300 pmags I bought last year.

Posted: 4/19/2015 6:38:12 PM EDT

[#43]

We have a common account, I have my slush fund, she has her slush fund, and we have common and separate investments.

Posted: 4/19/2015 6:42:53 PM EDT

[#44]

My wife don't work never has never will.
Back in 1984 she took over the banking, she does a hell of a job keeping up with it and never over spends.

Posted: 4/19/2015 6:50:30 PM EDT

[#45]

Quote History

Quoted:
I won't judge, but if you don't have all your money in a joint account with your wife, you don't love her. And she doesn't love you either.

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Posted: 4/19/2015 6:50:44 PM EDT

[#46]

Separate. It's the only way it would work for us, since we have diametrically different "money personalities." For example, my wife never balances her checkbook, whereas I know what I have down to the penny at all times. Each of us has enough money in the bank (lots!) so we don't fight over it. Been married 36 years.

Posted: 4/19/2015 6:54:42 PM EDT

[#47]

Quote History

Quoted:

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
I won't judge, but if you don't have all your money in a joint account with your wife, you don't love her. And she doesn't love you either.

I'm sorry you haven't experienced true love. Part of love is trust. Love without trust is lust. It is fleeting. It is temporary.

One day you'll experience true love, if you're lucky.

Posted: 4/19/2015 6:59:24 PM EDT

[#48]

Quote History

Quoted:

I'm sorry you haven't experienced true love. Part of love is trust. Love without trust is lust. It is fleeting. It is temporary.

One day you'll experience true love, if you're lucky.

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Quote History

Quoted:

Quoted:
I won't judge, but if you don't have all your money in a joint account with your wife, you don't love her. And she doesn't love you either.

I'm sorry you haven't experienced true love. Part of love is trust. Love without trust is lust. It is fleeting. It is temporary.

One day you'll experience true love, if you're lucky.

Pretty much, this.

If I couldn't trust my wife to be financially smart with our future I don't think I could trust her in other ways either.