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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:00:49 PM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Get MD at the end of your name. You will need to beat women off with a stick. Buy a Porsche and only wear aramani suits. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:00 PM EDT
[#2]
OP please post a pic of yourself. Maybe your look is all fucked up.
NVM Op did us one better. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:03 PM EDT
[#3]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Get MD at the end of your name. You will need to beat women off with a stick. Buy a Porsche and only wear aramani suits. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VglD8xIm5Yk |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:17 PM EDT
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
There is your problem Want to know you chance with a fattie? 50%. Want to know your chances with a hottie? 50% They can only say yes or no Nobody understands women. Message them all And work on your confidence We can tell you aren't confident, they can tell twice as easily Walk around like you have a huge cock and every lady wants it Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Don't exclude the hot women and try being a jerk. There is your problem Want to know you chance with a fattie? 50%. Want to know your chances with a hottie? 50% They can only say yes or no Nobody understands women. Message them all And work on your confidence We can tell you aren't confident, they can tell twice as easily Walk around like you have a huge cock and every lady wants it 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:41 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I would have a hard time pretending to be into modern art and folk music. The moment they say... "really? what artists/musicians do you like?", the gig is up. I could probably do a pretty convincing job of being a civil rights activist... seeing as a I used to be a Communist in High school. That lasted until I got my first job, and learned how painful it is for the government to take your hard earned money. Then I became a conservative,... and then finally a libertarian. Recently I found out the government is taking $1500 from me every year, just for being a loser. What the fuck!? Why should I have to subsidize the lives of happily married men out there!? Why should I be penalized by the government, simply because I can't get a woman to marry me!? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Mention modern art, civil rights or folk music, you're in like Flynn. Recently I found out the government is taking $1500 from me every year, just for being a loser. What the fuck!? Why should I have to subsidize the lives of happily married men out there!? Why should I be penalized by the government, simply because I can't get a woman to marry me!? This clips starts 15 seconds too late 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:45 PM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted: son, you came to the right place. you look like jon belushi right? check out some blues brothers or SNL fan sites. act like Belushi damnit. use it to your advantage. stop being a puss and do what I just said and you will be fighting them off |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:01:47 PM EDT
[#7]
As one ugly MOFO (no pics, of me or wife), you just have to keep trying. Never had a woman ask me out, ever. I've asked them all out, including her, and I'm a better man for it. YMMV.
ETA if the profille you posted is you, you're way handsomer than me!
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:02:02 PM EDT
[#8]
Op, do you have a picture of yourself? Maybe some obvious but fixable issues...
Most importantly, you have to be someone that has something to offer. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:02:27 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Start telling everyone your a virgin. Should be solved in a week or two. Make it a contest. See who will have the privilege of taking your pure essence. But wrap it and take that shit home with you when you leave. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:03:02 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
There are people out there with severe depression who have girlfriends. I know,... I work in mental health (feel free to pity me, lol). How the fuck do they get girlfriends when they have severe depression? My depression is mostly cyclical. I feel "ok" somedays, other days I feel more confident than others... but every once in a while I go into a pretty deep funk. 100% of the time I'm depressed, it's because I start thinking about how lonely I am. 
Quote HistoryQuoted:
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For the life of me, I can't get women to respond to me on POF and OKCupid. I have tried literally *EVERYTHING* from long messages that make references to things in their profile, to short one sentence copy-paste-repeat message spamming and everything in between. Women simply haven't been replying to me. I don't think I'm *THAT* ugly. What's really odd, is that I've even had women "Like" my profile, because I was "matched" with them (I.E. we both "liked" each other) on OKCupid. Problem is, when I actually message them... they never respond. I've tried being flirty, and not being flirt. I've tried being funny, and being serious. I seriously have no idea what to try next. I'm 31 years old, still a fucking virgin, and I'm really sick of it. I've been getting *REALLY* depressed about my lack of success with women,... and it's gotten to the point that it's even affecting my work. The one time I had a girlfriend, I actually was happy outside of work. I actually looked forward to getting off of work and spending time with someone. Ever since she dumped me... my prospects have really turned to shit. Now I'm at the point where I am seriously considering paying for sex.
I never thought I'd be the kind of loser that gets so desperate, that he'd be willing to pay for it. But here I am. 
So anyways, now I'm willing to literally act as an avatar for someone else to literally tell me step by step on what to message women... what to have on my profile, etc. I seriously want to start getting better results on these dating sites, because I seriously have no idea how to fix it. Everyone I know, seems to brag about how easy it is to get laid on POF... I feel it would be easier for me to hit the lottery. And before anyone starts... my standards are pretty fucking low. I *EXCLUSIVELY* message women who list themselves as "A few extra pounds" and above. I exclude all the "athletics, thin," etc self descriptors... because I feel they are out of my league. Over the past 3 years... I have lost about 40-50 lbs. I work a respectable job where I help people. I have a house that's paid off. I don't think I'm that bad looking... I really don't see why I'm having the trouble I'm having. Yes, I have some low self esteem... but there are people out there with *SEVERE* depression, and yet even they seem to be able to find mates. They can smell it. Like sharks with blood in the water.
Those people with mental health problems that have a relationship of some sort generally don't have a good one. Its usually a living hell teeming with co depence and emotional abuse. You know this. I wouldn't compare myself to those folks, you are a lot better off then them. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:03:08 PM EDT
[#11]
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:03:26 PM EDT
[#12]
Use the carpet-bombing method. Message every chick you find attractive. You'll eventually get replies.
On PoF use the meet-me and favorite features. They get alerted to both. On OKC use the quickmatch feature. If you and someone else 4 or 5 star each other I *think* it alerts both parts. I also think it notifies chicks when you 4 or 5 star their actual profile, or used to at least. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:03:47 PM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Why not exclude them? If the fat chicks are hard enough, what chance do I have with a hottie? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Don't exclude the hot women and try being a jerk. Fat chicks can be bitches. It couldn't hurt to message the hotties. You sound like you lack confidence.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:04:43 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted: There is your problem Want to know you chance with a fattie? 50%. Want to know your chances with a hottie? 50% They can only say yes or no Nobody understands women. Message them all And work on your confidence We can tell you aren't confident, they can tell twice as easily Walk around like you have a huge cock and every lady wants it Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Don't exclude the hot women and try being a jerk. There is your problem Want to know you chance with a fattie? 50%. Want to know your chances with a hottie? 50% They can only say yes or no Nobody understands women. Message them all And work on your confidence We can tell you aren't confident, they can tell twice as easily Walk around like you have a huge cock and every lady wants it As for my cock... my ex told me I was well endowed in the girth department. After some measuring, and a quick internet search to find out what women found "ideal"... I am pretty close to the "upper limit". SO that is actually one area I'm quite confident in.  |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:06:24 PM EDT
[#15]
Step 1: go to a supermarket....not walmart 2: profile the chicks by the contents of their carts to see who is single 3: I forgot wherei was going with this, kinda drunk Fuck it just pay. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:06:38 PM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:07:31 PM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted: OP please post a pic of yourself. Maybe your look is all fucked up. NVM Op did us one better. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:07:39 PM EDT
[#18]
Sorry to read about your troubles.
Hope your situation improves. Humans are pack animals. Women are far more concerned with your station in the pack than they are with what you look like. Try to become a success at something. Try to be able to demonstrate excellence in something in front of women. Sports, hobbies, music, speaking, anything. Improve yourself or, at the very least, improve how women perceive you. Good luck. We're on your side. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:07:51 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryNo homo but i would stick to the slightly longer hair and beard bro. And change the "looking for a relationship" to something a bit more vague if that's an option? +1 for BFL hat. 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:08:47 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. I like you 
EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:10:22 PM EDT
[#21]
Made me log in for this shit....JESUS SON!!! Have self confidence! I have been with what any man on this forum would consider a beyond beautiful woman, My wife is smoldering SEXY and I don't look ANY BETTER THAN YOU DO!!! Im not rich, Don't have a nice home, no money...but I have SELF CONFIDENCE!! act like you deserve better than them and the will flock to you. I promise! confidence is the most sought after hormone available. especially in AZ.....where im from pretty much.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:10:25 PM EDT
[#22]
I do kinda get where the OP is coming from. Me and my GF are having a hard time finding a chick for a 3 way.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:12:07 PM EDT
[#23]
What stands out to me is that your writing is grammatically correct. I skip right over dumbasses who can't write. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:12:08 PM EDT
[#24]
Dating sites are depressing to me. I was on one for awhile and the caliber of the women on there was just....well, what I'd expect to find on a dating website.
I had a friend that was on one for awhile and the amount of messages she got was alarming. I guess I refuse to play the 'send a billion messages and hope for a reply'. Because the chick that does reply....is probably fucked in the head, but after all the rejection, you feel like you almost have to take it. I just sit back, enjoy my life, and am happy. And....girls dig that. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:12:26 PM EDT
[#25]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
No homo but i would stick to the slightly longer hair and beard bro. And change the "looking for a relationship" to something a bit more vague if that's an option? +1 for BFL hat. Quote HistoryQuoted:
No homo but i would stick to the slightly longer hair and beard bro. And change the "looking for a relationship" to something a bit more vague if that's an option? +1 for BFL hat. What this guy said. Plus facial hair is coming back in a big way with girls for some reason. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:12:44 PM EDT
[#26]
I think the beard option is good for you. Maybe some different glasses, but I don't see any reason why you can't meet some great women.
I would bet the biggest issue, and it is tough to fix, is that women have this crazy strong "desperation" detector. Don't try to please anyone, be you, the right women will respond. Edit: although dating sites are more popular, the absolute best way to meet someone is through a friend. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:13:39 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I do kinda get where the OP is coming from. Me and my GF are having a hard time finding a chick for a 3 way. Hummm, your previous account name you had a thread about making women squirt? 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:15:01 PM EDT
[#28]
You're welcome http://delicioustacos.com/2014/08/04/okcupid-starter-kit-copy-this-and-tell-me-what-happens/ |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:15:01 PM EDT
[#29]
Honest question...
Why are you still a virgin? Did you want to hold out for marriage or have you been striking out since high school? |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:15:21 PM EDT
[#30]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I like you
EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. I like you
EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way
I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!! 
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:15:41 PM EDT
[#31]
You are desperate, stop doing that, they can smell it.
Acting like an asshole will get you laid alot, but it is not a good plan for long term. You're welcome.... Don't forget to wear a rubber.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:16:28 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Hummm, your previous account name you had a thread about making women squirt? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
I do kinda get where the OP is coming from. Me and my GF are having a hard time finding a chick for a 3 way. Hummm, your previous account name you had a thread about making women squirt? lol no this is my only account. Also I have yet to master the art of making chicks squirt.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:16:43 PM EDT
[#33]
If I start a gofundme for op's first hooker will you guys donate? I'm not paying for all of it.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:16:54 PM EDT
[#34]
OK...I just saw your pics. You are not ugly, you are an average looking dude (me too), but in one of the pics you look like Peter Griffen.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:17:00 PM EDT
[#35]
Bonus:
http://delicioustacos.com/2013/03/26/44-okcupid-openers/ |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:17:59 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryI don't think this is true, he wants some pussy, can't do the pedestal thing without the pussy part. Amiright? |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:18:51 PM EDT
[#37]
And get rid of any references to nerdy shit on your profile. Wtf man. Help me, help you!
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:18:52 PM EDT
[#38]
Heres a more recent pic I had taken by a coworker.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:19:15 PM EDT
[#39]
Ask them to go on a boat wide
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:20:25 PM EDT
[#40]
Keep the beard but make sure to keep it neat. Also if you have pictures of you at the beach you should be wearing shorts and sandals.
It's a numbers gig. Have about four different messages that you send out and rotate through them. I met my wife on POF and I never thought for a minute that she would message me back. Turned out she worked with my cousin and was showing my cousin some of the messages she was getting. Obviously my cousin recognized me and told her she should go out with me. We got married this past June. YMMV |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:20:26 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!!
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. I like you
EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way
I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!!
So you like guns, vote R, and have a BGE... Link to profile
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:20:42 PM EDT
[#42]
You don't need to act like an asshole. But give them the amount of respect and attention you would give a guy. Remember it is the person and not the twat you want.
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:21:17 PM EDT
[#43]
Do you have friends or coworkers to set you up with anyone? People (girls especially) love to play matchmaker. As for the self esteem issues, have you tried hitting up the gym? Try getting into lifting. Even if you don't end up looking like Arnold, it's a good way to blow off steam.
Online dating is frustrating. There are like 3 attractive girls within like a 50 mile radius of me. I messaged one, have a nice back and forth, lots of stuff in common, give her my number, and get no reply and no texts. My profile lasted about a week before getting nuked from orbit. I don't have FB, so no tinder, but I might give that a shot one of these days. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:23:02 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!! Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. I like you EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!! |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:24:02 PM EDT
[#45]
So in the spirit of trying to come off as "cocky"... I actually sent this as a line to someone on POF. How does this sound for at least the direction I'm taking it?
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:24:06 PM EDT
[#46]
Dude, the best thing you can do on there is just relax and try not to take it too personally or seriously.
If you see a girl who looks interesting, send her a quick message with something funny or whatever suits your personality and that's that. You'll get a few replies every once in a while, a few conversations that fizzle out, a few that seem to go well then stop all of a sudden, and a few that will result in dates. Don't make the mistake of thinking that every woman on there is looking for a good guy to date. Plenty are on there to boost their egos with no intention of meeting anyone, are looking for something extremely specific, cheat on their current boyfriend, or are just generally a little off. There are also a handful of good women on there who are looking for a real relationship, and it takes time/frustration on your part to find them and meet them. Just be yourself, be patient, and don't sweat the ones that aren't interested. Also, you don't want to portray any sense of desperation in any of your conversations. Relax and don't over think it, easier said than done sometimes, but the online dating thing is a strange animal. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:24:51 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Why not exclude them? If the fat chicks are hard enough, what chance do I have with a hottie? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Don't exclude the hot women and try being a jerk. Many 9s and 10s actually get hit on less than their less attractive sisters, since lots of men assume they have no chance and thus never approach them. The worst thing that'll happen if she says no. Try searching for "The Red Pill", it changed my life. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:24:57 PM EDT
[#48]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You should have messaged him back and told him he was too much of a pussy for you. Seriously Quote HistoryQuoted:
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I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992. Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard. Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking. I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities. You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes. Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that. Just be yourself, but with confidence. You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile. It's worked for me. YMMV. I'm female and get a lot of messages. Too bad none of them seem to be what I'm looking for, and many of them DO come off as too desperate. I keep my account open, but I find myself out "living" more than paying attention to the inbox most of the time. I have better luck meeting people randomly. The worst guys are the ones who never bothered to read a word of my profile. I absolutely refuse to date a liberal too. I like you
EDIT: in a strictly platonic , gun toting, republican kind of way
I'm not kidding. A nice looking guy last week messaged me on Match. I pulled up his profile and it said liberal and I immediately deleted his message. Can you imagine the ass hurt if he found out I was into guns and more of a man than he is? Yeah...pass!!
you need to use that kinda tone and confidence when talking to chicks. The way you present yourself and confidence is everything. |
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:25:31 PM EDT
[#49]
tag
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Posted: 10/22/2014 9:25:35 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
So in the spirit of trying to come off as "cocky"... I actually sent this as a line to someone on POF. How does this sound for at least the direction I'm taking it?
hummm. no |
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