For the life of me, I can't get women to respond to me on POF and OKCupid. I have tried literally *EVERYTHING* from long messages that make references to things in their profile, to short one sentence copy-paste-repeat message spamming and everything in between. Women simply haven't been replying to me.





I don't think I'm *THAT* ugly. What's really odd, is that I've even had women "Like" my profile, because I was "matched" with them (I.E. we both "liked" each other) on OKCupid. Problem is, when I actually message them... they never respond. I've tried being flirty, and not being flirt. I've tried being funny, and being serious. I seriously have no idea what to try next.





I'm 31 years old, still a fucking virgin, and I'm really sick of it. I've been getting *REALLY* depressed about my lack of success with women,... and it's gotten to the point that it's even affecting my work. The one time I had a girlfriend, I actually was happy outside of work. I actually looked forward to getting off of work and spending time with someone. Ever since she dumped me... my prospects have really turned to shit.





Now I'm at the point where I am seriously considering paying for sex.





I never thought I'd be the kind of loser that gets so desperate, that he'd be willing to pay for it. But here I am.





So anyways, now I'm willing to literally act as an avatar for someone else to literally tell me step by step on what to message women... what to have on my profile, etc. I seriously want to start getting better results on these dating sites, because I seriously have no idea how to fix it. Everyone I know, seems to brag about how easy it is to get laid on POF... I feel it would be easier for me to hit the lottery. And before anyone starts... my standards are pretty fucking low. I *EXCLUSIVELY* message women who list themselves as "A few extra pounds" and above. I exclude all the "athletics, thin," etc self descriptors... because I feel they are out of my league.





Over the past 3 years... I have lost about 40-50 lbs. I work a respectable job where I help people. I have a house that's paid off. I don't think I'm that bad looking... I really don't see why I'm having the trouble I'm having. Yes, I have some low self esteem... but there are people out there with *SEVERE* depression, and yet even they seem to be able to find mates.






 

Don't exclude the hot women and try being a jerk.

Why not exclude them? If the fat chicks are hard enough, what chance do I have with a hottie?

 

Um, that's normal?

You're probably like most other dudes, regular , nothing special . Wheni was on those I sent hundreds of emails.

I received , in no particular order, one no thank you , one I'm not looking for a guy right now , and one chick actually was pissed I sent her an obvious copy paste email.

When I informed her that that was the first non no response she got really pissed

Honestly, if your not brad Pitt , you ain't gonna get shit for replies.

Did I make it in befor e the Internet enrico suavees?

In!

In

Mention modern art, civil rights or folk music, you're in like Flynn.

I don't know how to be a jerk. What do I say?

 

"How is your relationship with your father?"

Please respond

Show us your profile so we can see what you are doing wrong. (What's the worst that could happen?)

So how the fuck do I get myself laid, besides paying for it?

 

31 and still a virgin?


So IN!!!

Tinder, man... Tinder...

Fake self confidence. Women smelldesperation from a mile away.

They can smell it. Like sharks with blood in the water.

Its a numbers game. Don't read into anything and don't dwell on responses or lack thereof, time inbetween responses or even what they say. Try to think more like a evil online spam marketer till you have one hooked. Play cocky and cool.

I can sense the desperation and self esteem trouble over 1000 miles away... If I can, a lady damn sure will be able to.

Its not a good thing btw.

Serious:
Can im your profile to me I'll look it over and tell you what to change.

How does your profile read?



If you want to PM it to me - I can give you some thoughts.

I would have a hard time pretending to be into modern art and folk music. The moment they say... "really? what artists/musicians do you like?", the gig is up. I could probably do a pretty convincing job of being a civil rights activist... seeing as a I used to be a Communist in High school. That lasted until I got my first job, and learned how painful it is for the government to take your hard earned money. Then I became a conservative,... and then finally a libertarian.



Recently I found out the government is taking $1500 from me every year, just for being a loser. What the fuck!? Why should I have to subsidize the lives of happily married men out there!? Why should I be penalized by the government, simply because I can't get a woman to marry me!?

 

Pay for it, and don't look back. Get it off of the pedestal, and you won't come off as so desperate.

Start telling everyone your a virgin. Should be solved in a week or two.

Lol, how the fuck would I know , I'm currently on a six year dry spell.

And FTR, GD is an awesome place for this type of help

Just remember , those women get hundreds of emails a day, gotta try and stand out

Are you asking me? or are you suggesting I say this to women?

 

Striking out with the womenz...........


























Maybe it's time to go to the darkside.......

Buy a Miata and get some artificial crab meat........

Use tinder. Refer to this thread.

"moody loner with an assault rifle" ?

Woman advice on arf!?!?   In for all the

Use ARF thread titles as pick up lines... if it works for tinder it should work for other sites.

In on this

ETA:  I've met a bunch of chicks online, some really cool that I still hang out with, and couple head cases.  The key is to make your initial message to them stand out from the rest.  Actually read their profile and start a convo based on something out of their profile.  The current chick I'm seeing listed "sailing and boating" as an interest.  I opened up the convo with "what's your favorite type of sailboat?  I grew up sailing a J24 and Sunfish's."  Boom.  Hook set.

No luck there. I swipe right all the time. message all of them. No luck.

 

lol!

1.  Did you verify that the users you messaged had logged in within a few days before you sent the message?  Lots of profiles up that haven't been active in months.

2.  This is a numbers game, send as many messages as you can.  Quality is not so important.  I always shot for 5 messages per day.  That lead to about 4  girls per month, multiple dates with each.

3.  Normal looking girls get bombarded.  Seriously, its bizarre.  I have a friend who is probably a 7.  Nothing to write home about, but an attractive girl.  She showed me her mailbox and she honestly averaged about 8 messages an hour.  8 per hour.  She told me that she quit reading them after about 2 days, that when she was ready for a date, she would pick one off the first page of her inbox that looked attractive and respond to what was in the message so long as it wasn't lotion on the skin bizarre.  

4.  Have fun.  Get used to rejection, it happens far more often than acceptance.  That goes for old fashioned dating as well.

5.  Post your profile pics.  The problem may be you

You don't pay for sex. You pay them to leave afterwards.

It'll happen. Just be yourself.

As I stated in the original post... yes

 

This is what I'm thinking. I wonder how many old chicks are on there

Works 87% of the time.

Go to the "meet me" section and click yes to everyone Then check the mutual matches.

Well at least you have big balls. If I had to write something like this it would be in team.

Do you have plenty of guy friends? Easy to make friends and start conversations? Honestly, would you describe yourself as socially awkward?

The best advice I got at the moment is: until you are in a place where you are HAPPY with yourself and your life, every girl is gonna smell the depression on you a mile away and avoid you. Find your confidence. It doesn't have to be "I can bed any chick in the state" confidence. Just be confident that you are a good dude, and are happy. As soon as you find that happy place where you are loving life, girl or no girl, and things are going great, some girl will come into the picture and fuxk it all up .

This! I had it in HS and had zero problems. Somehwere I became pussified and seemed to be in the friend zone. Had my balls drop again and back in the game.
Not saying be a D-BAG (although that seems to work pretty well).
Be confident, go out and get fitted for some nice clothes (NO FEDORA ) and strut with a pimp cane. OK leave the pimp cane out

Was going to post this. That thread was hilarious.

There is your problem

Want to know you chance with a fattie? 50%. Want to know your chances with a hottie? 50%


They can only say yes or no

Nobody understands women. Message them all

And work on your confidence

We can tell you aren't confident, they can tell twice as easily


Walk around like you have a huge cock and every lady wants it

I haven't had much luck with the online thing, and I've been online since 1992.



Do it in real life, but maybe quit trying so hard.  Do something you like, like biking, kayaking, hiking.  I've heard there are singles groups for outdoor activities.  You could also try church if you are so inclined, or theater, perhaps take some classes.



Don't try to put on an act, people will see right through that.  Just be yourself, but with confidence.  You don't have to showboat, but just carry yourself like you are ready for anything, and do it with a smile.



It's worked for me.  YMMV.

Nothing wrong with this. Just dont fall for them or you'll end up making a thread in GD

son, you came to the right place.

you look like jon belushi right?

check out some blues brothers or SNL fan sites.

act like Belushi damnit. use it to your advantage.

stop being a puss and do what I just said and you will be fighting them off

Get MD at the end of your name. You will need to beat women off with
a stick.

Buy a Porsche and only wear aramani suits.

I would also advise to not limit yourself to the ones who only identify as fat or chubby or whatever. Half the girls on those sites are 20-50lbs heavier then they have the camera trick you into believing

Also, who the hell cares if you pay for it? Fuck dude too much longer with these posts and I will chip in 50 "roses"

There are people out there with severe depression who have girlfriends. I know,... I work in mental health (feel free to pity me, lol). How the fuck do they get girlfriends when they have severe depression? My depression is mostly cyclical. I feel "ok" somedays, other days I feel more confident than others... but every once in a while I go into a pretty deep funk. 100% of the time I'm depressed, it's because I start thinking about how lonely I am.





 

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