I compiled this last night in a different thread and it got me thinking. ARFcom has had an influx of recently single members whether by their doing or the other persons doing. Some have said,"Oh well!!" and moved on to the next person and other have followed a different path. Well I am here to post what I have learned through trial and error and the lessons I learned early on years ago about dating women in general. But how does DD know so much yet been married for almost 9 years you say???!!???, well I learned these all before marriage and I am the unofficial go to guy among my single friends for the rules and the tricks to dating/fucking 2 or more women at a time and neither finding out about the other. I'm a damn pro and if I truly wanted to, could easily go behind my wife's back, but she is a great catch and I prefer to be with her as opposed to a random chick for a couple of fuck sessions and then onto the next. So sit back, take notes and hope this helps those who need it.

Follow these rules while you're easing back into dating or if you have no clue on how to date online or in real life.....
(Not in any specific order and other Masters, please feel free to add to what I have come up with so far)

1. Call once after a couple days....if she doesn't answer when she isn't supposed to be at work....don't call again and forget her.

2. However long between texts she takes to get back to you....that's when you return a text.

3. Don't ever offer your number if you're online dating. Wait until they ask or if they give it to you.

4. ALWAYS refer to them as a woman....not chic, hooker, babe, hottie...you get my drift.

5.First date should be lunch or early afternoon. Then promptly leave after 2-3 hours and for love of god, don't call or text until the next day or day after.

6.If your past girlfriends/wife comes up in conversation.....don't tear the ex up...say that she screwed up but took 2 to screw it up.....shows you are not bitter and you take responsibility for your actions.....regardless of the responsibility of your actions part,who cares if you really do or not as you're trying to get tail and not your next wife.

7.Don't talk about your impending divorce. Since you're not going to marry the chick you are trying to fuck, anytime soon, that doesn't need to be brought up. Again your objective isn't to jump into another marriage/long term thing right now.  

8.Take all the pics of your ex off your phone. Change the pet/nickname of your ex on your phone to her name.  

9.Let the new chick pick out things to do on first few dates. Be assertive and confident in whatever they suggest to show you're a strong male though.

10.Stay as positive as possible and don't get into heavy deep and usually negative discussions on life,family,deaths or exes. Keep things fun and light.

11.Don't text or call everyday. Coin toss on the night you last talked making it 1 or 2 days until you initiate a text or call. This shows you have a life but are still available. Obviously return calls and texts. Don't answer the first time she calls on some days too this is same principle.

12.Don't be afraid to pretend to like some bullshit they are into. Also DONOT bring up guns or politics until you know for sure she will not flip out and also they do not want to talk about current news events. They could give a shit less, do engage conversation if they bring up current events, but keep it short and don't go I to Arfcom style depth as to why this or that is the root cause etc.

I can go on but enough for now. Good luck and hope this helps.

Added rule: SIIHPAPP!!!!!!!

That's definitely on the list but be patient young Padewan.

-work out 3 times a week
-brush your teeth and get hair cuts frequently (if you have hair left)
-secure a good job
-put up a picture holding an adorable animal.

Profit!

You could not have been a gun monkey as your spelling and grammar are too good.

Depending on the chic, embellish the job you have....if she is a right now kind of chic that is. They don't verify through NICS etc so if your looking for a quick fun time...no harm in this.

The haircut, brush your teeth and working out are all things I felt was an unnecessary item and was a major implication on the whole dating realm,I could be wrong.

Fuck yeah I was, 0981 though.....they picked the better gun monkeys though

I'm kinda shocked there isn't more interest due to the amount of divorce/break up threads and the break up threads are rather interesting due tithe short time of some folks relationships such as a few dates to a month or bit longer.

I don't agree with 1,2,3

I guess I'm no fun.  My wife is in my phone under her name.

The funny thing is that since she just imported a vcard for me I show up as Mr. Smiling Bandit on her phone.  

Notes on how to bang women from a squid.  Huh.  Like taking notes on how to diet from Rosie O'Donnall.

Disclaimer should say for 1,2,3 that it is dependent on the woman. I agree some women want to text a lot and want the guy to initiate and will accept your number after just a few messaging on the comp etc. So dated discretion I'd suggest.

You are no fun cuz your married.

I don't need it, I have the kevorka

Often makes it very hard to be married.

I hope your not serious???? All you Jarheads in overseas port only wanted to fight squids in bars while we were chasing tail.

I really hated when a landing ship pulled into port after us as this was typically the end outcome. Some bullsht bar fight so Jarheads could flex and prove they were #1, but we squids are accustomed to fighting drunk then chasing tail afterwards.  I kicked plenty of Jarheads asses overseas due to this very scenario. No I didn't win them all but we were looking for pussy and not a fight.

What advice do you have for guys like me, who can't even get women to like him on Tinder, Eharmony, OKCupid, POF, Zoosk, etc? It seems like women look at my picture, and just go "ugh! no thanks!"



I'm lucky if I go on 3 dates a year.

 

Get in shape. Get a haircut. Get new clothes. Take new photos.

 

I'm ugly too and my advice is be confident in all aspects of your life. Whatever your job is, learn more to be better at it and this shows to others. Your hobbies, being outside of shooting....master that and people will take notice, mainly women.

I have read your replies in similar threads and don't be so hard on yourself. Shoot for the stars and you will find one eventually. Took me years to find the right gal and even then it's not a bed of roses.

I wish I could argue that point.  

 

We just wanted to drink & fuck hot women whether locals or women on holiday.

 

This thread is relevant to my interests, OP.



How much experience do you (or anybody) have with Zoosk, specifically?



I know it's joined at the hip with FB, and they keep sending me 'matches', 99% of which seem too good to be true, to say the least.



Is it worth joining, or just a waste of time and money?

tagged

Are you looking to get laid or get married?

Yes.

It's two very different goals with very different strategies.

Getting laid via the internet is easy, IMO. It's really just a numbers game, and I would use a tool like Tinder or the large free dating sites for that.

Finding someone to date long term/marry is WAAAAY harder, and I prefer to meet potential mates in real life, rather than over the internet. I am a big concert goer, and I liked meeting women at concerts. I knew we had some mutual interest, and inhibitions are usually down at shows. I also liked meeting women in school, which is part of why I have two masters degrees.

I'm not exactly an internet-dating noob here.



Do you have experience with Zoosk, specifically?

What do boobs feel like?

ditto. I'm actually talking to a person on the Tinder now.

No. But they are all basically the same with basically the same people on them.

Thanks.

Bags of sand, of course.

Confidence is key.
Be fun, be funny. If you can make a chick smile, you can get in her pants.
Don't let them plan the first date. Be assertive. You are an alpha male, remember?
Don't plan the first date at a bar. That's fucking boring. Make it something fun, followed, or before, witn drinks.

I'm working on getting into better shape.... but I'm not *SO* fat that it's that noticeable in photos. I also don't exclusively message super models. I often do find myself messaging fat chicks.

The photos I have, my hair looks decent.

The clothes I have on in my photos, are also quite nice (at least in my opinion.

However, I don't feel I really take good photos. I'm not very ... photogenic.

 

I have no clue on Zoosk or Tinder. Im married, but I still have buddies coming to me for advice and the game is a little different, but I
did enough online dating back then thanks to MSN Chatrooms and got a ton of tail from them, Met many right now girls but met a couple
good women. Those chatrooms are long gone and thing tinder and zoosk are the natural progression.

Worst that can happen is you never hear from whoever you message right11???

Warm fresh baked sponge cake

If the girl looks kind of nerdy start off with "You're kind of cute in a Bernadette Rostenkowski kind of way."

Works every time.

That's about the shape of it, yes.  



Thanks!

Everything you need to know here-

Using Arf thread titles as tinder pickup lines thread

Yes

 

Nerdy girls seem to like normal guys. This is when if your looking for a right now girl....do some research on whatever she is interested in
to sound somewhat knowledgeable and fit in to her world to get some action......If its a right for relationship girl.....your fucked unless you dive into that
and learn to like it or actually have an interest. She will see right through you.

I don't agree with #1 or #2 everyone has a life. If you think anyone is sitting by the phone waiting for you to call you are crazy.

ETA: And I thought the whole purpose of texting was so the recipient could reply when it was convenient versus having to stop what they were doing to answer the phone.

And on top of that not everyone has a nice quiet job. Half the time I never hear my phone ring.

You make some good points, may be a little complex for GD though:

Make her laugh

Find something that's fun for both of you

Be yourself

You don't care what she or anyone else thinks

If she's a 9 or 10, then you need to have a "I could take it or leave attitude"

If she's a 6, tell her how beautiful she is

Make her laugh

Make her laugh

Don't be 1 dimensional

You can never smile too much or make too much eye contact, did I mention make her laugh?



IF anyone hasn't read Sean Connery's Swingset's women manifesto that's your starting point.

I agree with most of your points, they are lessons I learned as well.  However, 2, 9, and 12 I disagree with.

Meh. Guess a lot of those "tips" should be considered common sense.

Tinder is just a copy of Hot or Not

 

Look at it this way for you guys who got shoved into lockers. Look back all the way from junior high to however old you are now.

Who was it getting their first blow job in middle school? The arrogant shit heads who stuffed you in your locker. Who was the one fucking every Friday night after the football game? The arrogant shit head athlete who stuffed you into your locker. Who was the one in college bringing home all the tail to their doorm or apartment? The arrogant shit head ladies man who came to you for help on his classes but wouldn't help you if you needed pissed on if you were on fire. Who is the one banging all the office chick's?

Shall I continue?

It took me until I was a freshman in college to figure it out. Once I figured out how to be confident, get in shape, and not make every girl your everything because they might be "the one" the pussy comes running to you. Just ask my now wife what we did on our first date? I didn't need a wingman on speed dial to rescue me. I fucking took him with us an he ate dinner with us. Both me and my roommate smell of cheap beer and gunpowder because we just got don't burning 1000rounds of ammo.

By the way, I took her home that night!