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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:55:22 AM EDT
[#1]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I hear ya. I'm constantly bemoaning my situation - why couldn't I have been born rich, instead of so damned good-lookin'?  Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: I have found that my stunning good looks and charming personality are more of a curse than a blessing.  I hear ya. I'm constantly bemoaning my situation - why couldn't I have been born rich, instead of so damned good-lookin'? To know me is to love me. I must be one hell of a man. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:55:44 AM EDT
[#2]
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It's called adversity. You're supposed to overcome it. Do you have terminal ass cancer? Did you lose you testicles stepping on a land mine? Were your wife and 3 kids killed in their minivan by a 5 time DUI driving on a suspended license? Put things in perspective. That is the one thing that I am having a difficult time with....maybe I just need more time to deal with this. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:56:55 AM EDT
[#3]
35 is a great age OP. You can now date girls in the 20's and not look like a perv
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:57:44 AM EDT
[#4]
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We never had any kids together....I don't know how I would be as a dad, let alone a step dad. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy.  I have step-children and it works out really well. As long as your willing to treat them the same as you would your own kids. I see nothing wrong with them already having kids. If you would reconsider this and give it a try you could widen your options. We never had any kids together....I don't know how I would be as a dad, let alone a step dad. I don't have any kids of my own either. Just saying sometimes a woman who has had to raise children by themselves for a while are less likely to be a train wreck. Not saying to go out hunting for a new relationship. Just advising that you shouldn't let it be a deal breaker. Hell I have 2 step daughters that love to go out and shoot targets with me. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:58:51 AM EDT
[#5]
Quoted:
No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. Hang in there. It gets better. I divorced after 6 years of hell, er..... marriage. Took me three years after that to stumble onto the right woman. Been married over six years now and loving every minute of it. Now, the intravening time was tough. The rebound was God-awful. It wasn't until I decided that I could live by myself quite well, thank you, that things turned. Give it time. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:59:20 AM EDT
[#6]
Been there brother. There are many traps you need to avoid right now. #1 if she offers don't go back to seeing the X.
You need to get your head on straight before chasing any women. Right now you will stink of desperation and that repels women like kryptonite. If you have friends to hang with then you a doing good lots of divorced men find they don't. All their buddies are married and don't have time for them anymore. Get into a group for social activities. There are many singles groups on FB and other places. Go to the events to hang out not to chase. Don't let your little head lead the way. If you start having issues with Jr. hire an Escort wrap you tool and you'll be fine. I know lots of bible thumpers are going have a stroke on that one but it works. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:59:41 AM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted: No wonder you got 24/365's Bro of the year award. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: More ink is part of the solution. Epic ink is even better. The ink itself is gratifying and is something you want. But the experience is also a part of it. The more you are at the tattoo shop is more time out of the house. Get to know the artist and the crew at the shop. Get some competition level work started and then trade ink for competing. Meet more artists and more cool people. No wonder you got 24/365's Bro of the year award.  |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 8:59:55 AM EDT
[#8]
Take a vacation and forget about your problems for a week or 2. It does wonders and will give you perspective.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:03:43 AM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Guitar Center has a Friday/Saturday night open jam session that I have toyed around with going to (been blaying bass guitar since I was 13). Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Enlarge your circle of friends. Go do things you enjoy and meet people doing it. Try a new gym. Good luck. Guitar Center has a Friday/Saturday night open jam session that I have toyed around with going to (been blaying bass guitar since I was 13). There you go; best idea to this point in your thread. Since you're in or near an urban area, I would get hooked up with one of the groups for singles that go on outdoors activities; biking, hiking, float trips, fishing, and so on. Let the activity act as a hog filter. In Nebraska, I'd probably buy a bird dog or two and do some heavy concentration on quail and pheasant hunting. If a woman wants to go along, great, but make her carry her gun, don't do it for her no matter how much whining emitted. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:05:34 AM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
There you go; best idea to this point in your thread. Since you're in or near an urban area, I would get hooked up with one of the groups for singles that go on outdoors activities; biking, hiking, float trips, fishing, and so on. Let the activity act as a hog filter. In Nebraska, I'd probably buy a bird dog or two and do some heavy concentration on quail and pheasant hunting. If a woman wants to go along, great, but make her carry her gun, don't do it for her no matter how much whining emitted. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Enlarge your circle of friends. Go do things you enjoy and meet people doing it. Try a new gym. Good luck. Guitar Center has a Friday/Saturday night open jam session that I have toyed around with going to (been blaying bass guitar since I was 13). There you go; best idea to this point in your thread. Since you're in or near an urban area, I would get hooked up with one of the groups for singles that go on outdoors activities; biking, hiking, float trips, fishing, and so on. Let the activity act as a hog filter. In Nebraska, I'd probably buy a bird dog or two and do some heavy concentration on quail and pheasant hunting. If a woman wants to go along, great, but make her carry her gun, don't do it for her no matter how much whining emitted. I may or may not do a little bit of bird hunting in the fall. 
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:05:58 AM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Any 27 year old woman banging a 45 year old man has pleeeeeeeeeenty of issues. Lol. Daddy issues for sure at the very least. Not faulting you for it, just saying... Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Cause the women my age have issues? K snowflake? Any 27 year old woman banging a 45 year old man has pleeeeeeeeeenty of issues. Lol. Daddy issues for sure at the very least. Not faulting you for it, just saying... Thanks God for daddy issues...
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:13:19 AM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That is the one thing that I am having a difficult time with....maybe I just need more time to deal with this. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: It's called adversity. You're supposed to overcome it. Do you have terminal ass cancer? Did you lose you testicles stepping on a land mine? Were your wife and 3 kids killed in their minivan by a 5 time DUI driving on a suspended license? Put things in perspective. That is the one thing that I am having a difficult time with....maybe I just need more time to deal with this. You will either adopt the view that your situation is good and women are fun or you will sink into despair, feel terrible about yourself, and then become bitter towards women. It all depends on how you choose to view your situation. We had a thread about a month ago where the guy chose the second option. Lots of people gave him tips to change things but he had an excuse for everyone of them. BTW, when I was 36 I had the best year of my dating life because I chose to let go some of my limiting beliefs. You aren't too old for bars, that is a limiting belief. Find a guy friend or two to go have a drink with it. Make it a fun experience with zero concern for the women around you. If nothing else it will be a night out where you choose what to do and have fun. Learning to let go of any baggage and just go out to have a good time will be the first step. Find a place/activity that interests you, go there often and learn everything about it. Now you are an "expert". Being confident in your surroundings will put you in a relaxed and confident state. Then women a woman you are interested in shows up or you take a date there you are already 2 steps ahead of the game. There are plenty of 22 to 26 year old women that want to go out and have a fun night. Almost everyone I dated when I was 36 was between 22 and 26. That age group is the most open minded and just want to experience/enjoy life. Get on POF or OKCupid, learn the online dating game, and you will have more tail than you feel like dealing with. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:15:19 AM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted: That is the one thing that I am having a difficult time with....maybe I just need more time to deal with this. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: It's called adversity. You're supposed to overcome it. Do you have terminal ass cancer? Did you lose you testicles stepping on a land mine? Were your wife and 3 kids killed in their minivan by a 5 time DUI driving on a suspended license? Put things in perspective. That is the one thing that I am having a difficult time with....maybe I just need more time to deal with this. Call it a personal growth exercise. Once you see that, you realize that if you are sane, healthy and not addicted, things really aren't that bad for you. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:17:04 AM EDT
[#14]
And if you ever need a reminder that there are some good women out there, just look at a few on here.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:17:45 AM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And if you ever need a reminder that there are some good women out there, just look at a few on here. That is truth. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:19:26 AM EDT
[#16]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You're probably due for some new underwear.  Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:t I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years You're probably due for some new underwear. Nah, go commando, women love that! Oh, and try online dating, there's an ocean of women out there and you can weed out the worst of them fast. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:19:57 AM EDT
[#17]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Been there brother. There are many traps you need to avoid right now. #1 if she offers don't go back to seeing the X. You need to get your head on straight before chasing any women. Right now you will stink of desperation and that repels women like kryptonite. If you have friends to hang with then you a doing good lots of divorced men find they don't. All their buddies are married and don't have time for them anymore. Get into a group for social activities. There are many singles groups on FB and other places. Go to the events to hang out not to chase. Don't let your little head lead the way. If you start having issues with Jr. hire an Escort wrap you tool and you'll be fine. I know lots of bible thumpers are going have a stroke on that one but it works. This is why one of your prime directives is "try to not have sex". First it forces you to focus on your relationships with people that matter, an on your goals, and on yourself. Second when you go out to a bar or hang out with friends or what ever it puts you above the fray. If you don't care about fucking some chick then you won't be desperate to get in her pants. It let's you actually weigh he as a person and if you even care about talking to her for more than 20minutes. Ohh and humans always want what they can't have, so when you do see something you like you can just sit back and she will come after you. And it becomes your choice if you want her or feel ready to be with her. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:21:15 AM EDT
[#18]
Quoted:
No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. Not saying this to be ugly, but you sound like kinda of a train wreck yourself. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:22:11 AM EDT
[#19]
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Everyone should live by themselves at least once in their lives. If you haven't before, then now is the time to learn how. Good advice. I find it strange to see so many men dependent on their wives for so much. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:22:16 AM EDT
[#20]
Not sure how long ago this happened to you but you need to give yourself some time. In the past nine months my grandmother passed away, my dog died, my woman of 9.5 years ran off with an attorney friend of ours while I was on a business trip, and my mother was diagnosed with stage IV triple negative breast cancer. From March to mid May of this year I was pretty much a zombie. I woke up one morning and made the conscious decision that I was going to be OK and I needed to get my shit together to be strong for my mom. Get out there doing something, anything, and take the time to get your head wrapped around who you are and what you want to do with the rest of YOUR life. It really does get better and probably quicker than you think it will right now. Wait until your x comes back and you tell her to piss off. Empowering! As for other woman, I adopted an I don't give a f&#@ attitude and for now, it works just fine. Do not go be some wounded puppy and expect results. Good luck and pm me if you need to chat. It does help to have someone to talk to for a while. Take care.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:23:48 AM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
First thing gone will be that fucking hydrandria (sp?) out of the front yard...I've always hated that fucking plant. Have fun with it, make it a party to get rid of the plant. Have a contest, give it to the girl at the party that gives the best bj or something like that. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:24:45 AM EDT
[#22]
Dude being single is the coolest. It's like a 7 day weekend. It's like every day is a big 80s rock video. Nobody bothers you. You can do whatever and you can always tell the chick "welp that was fun. Now go home."
And you should never trust women. Ever. They are all mercenaries. And to quote the black Army Ranger from the Rock. 'Mercenaries get paid.' 
Seriously every woman is like the two Army Rangers from The Rock. They are cooler than everyone else. Aloof. Do fun things. But they are mercenaries and mercenaries get paid. Otherwise man just hang out and chill. Call up an old friend. Go make a new one. Go on an adventure. Discover yourself. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:26:36 AM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Not saying this to be ugly, but you sound like kinda of a train wreck yourself. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. Not saying this to be ugly, but you sound like kinda of a train wreck yourself. Clearly.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:26:40 AM EDT
[#24]
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If she is hideous it doesn't really matter. Lol. You guys keep on throwing out ages... but you're not saying whether they are 4's or 10's. Lmao. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. I'm not much younger than you and I still go clubbing and bang chicks in their mid to early 20's. You're not too old. Step up your game. Lol. You both need to step up. I'm 41 and banged a 26yo weekend before last. 45 goes into 27 just fine. You need to step it up. If she is hideous it doesn't really matter. Lol. You guys keep on throwing out ages... but you're not saying whether they are 4's or 10's. Lmao. I'm 53 and dating a hot 37 y/o asian for a couple years now. She has a body that's better than most 18 y/o high school girls. She's not a 10 but solid 8/9 depending on your taste in women :) If I can do it, you sure can! |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:29:53 AM EDT
[#25]
Quoted:
Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. Ha. The single women your age are a disaster because all the successful, single men in their mid-30s are going for hot 22 year olds. But forget about them for now. Don't worry about finding a new girl and getting into a another serious relationship ASAP. That's the last thing you need to be thinking about. Focus on your job and finances. Focus on working out, eating right, and getting in even better shape. Focus on getting some nice new clothes and looking sharp. Focus on yourself and your own passions and interests. You finally have time and freedom to actually DO the things you have always wanted to do but were never able to do when your entire purpose in life was being a husband. Travel, build a hot rod, read books, hunt animals, learn to paint, whatever. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:30:14 AM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
What is it with old dudes wanting to bang girls that could be their daughters? Mid life crisis? Not at all, women age poorly. Give me smooth taut skin and muscles any day over a flabby, droopy old cow. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:32:39 AM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
If she is hideous it doesn't really matter. Lol. You guys keep on throwing out ages... but you're not saying whether they are 4's or 10's. Lmao. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. I'm not much younger than you and I still go clubbing and bang chicks in their mid to early 20's. You're not too old. Step up your game. Lol. You both need to step up. I'm 41 and banged a 26yo weekend before last. 45 goes into 27 just fine. You need to step it up. If she is hideous it doesn't really matter. Lol. You guys keep on throwing out ages... but you're not saying whether they are 4's or 10's. Lmao. She was a 7 or 8. I was not even that drunk. I did have a hard time listening to her stupid bullshit the few hours it took to get in her pants. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:33:26 AM EDT
[#28]
Well, I am out for the day. I'll check back in later on, this has been an interesting thread. Looking forward to more advise. Thanks guys.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:34:40 AM EDT
[#29]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Not at all, women age poorly. Give me smooth taut skin and muscles any day over a flabby, droopy old cow. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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What is it with old dudes wanting to bang girls that could be their daughters? Mid life crisis? Not at all, women age poorly. Give me smooth taut skin and muscles any day over a flabby, droopy old cow. This. I mean come on. Are our standards for what's attractive supposed to change with our age? Sorry. The evolutionary drive to impregnate every available female as soon as she becomes available is STILL a valid way of maximizing transmission of your genes as a male. Bang every 18yo girl you can, and plant as many bastards as possible regardless of their mother's age. That is the evolutionary creedo of success. Obey it or the future will belong to the kids of those who did while you kept banging post menopausal women out of duty. Yes, as a modern male I'm going straight to hell for this post. I can live with that as long as there are some hot young things DTF down there with me.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:40:54 AM EDT
[#30]
If you want to meet women go to the grocery store. Get a basket and put some meat in it, then go to the veggie isles.
Wear a smile and look lost. They will start talking to you about food and cooking. Pick one you like. go on a saturday morning, those were not out getting hammered the night before and have a job. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:41:16 AM EDT
[#31]
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The late James Garner once said "Marriage is like the Army; everyone complains, but you'd be surprised at the large number of people who re-enlist". BUT! he died one month before his 58th wedding anniversary; so he was a lifer; a rarity in Hollywood! Either that or he just couldn't stomach the thought of yet ANOTHER anniversary... |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:42:13 AM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
At 35 there are plenty of hotties out there. Wait until you are 50 and looking and you'll have something to complain about. Talk about women who look 65 to 70 and are a train wreck. 50 gets 30 easily enough dude. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:44:49 AM EDT
[#33]
Take life one day at a time. Don't rush into another relationship. Don't be reckless with your pecker. Keep going to the gym. Join different social groups: (like Events and Adventures). Get new hobbies (hiking, climbing, etc)
That's my advice.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:45:10 AM EDT
[#34]
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35 and in your prime. Pull up your boot straps cowboy, lift some weights get in shape and find the woman of your dreams who is meant to be! Men age like a fine brandy, women..... like a poorly bottled beer. Cheer up, buttercup.  This! I went through the same process for the first year before finding "my own brand of cool". Not that anyone else thinks I'm cool--but I do and that's what matters. You have to be comfortable in your own skin and it takes a while after a longer marriage to get there. You can't go out and look for "a relationship". It will find you. Go out and sow some oats, get back in the saddle and figure out what kind of women you like to go out with. Remember, the worst way to find out what kind of wine you like is to buy the whole bottle. Go wine tasting for awhile. (It's a metaphor, I'm not really talking about wine...wink, wink.) Settle in and have fun. You're still just a pup. 
TC |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:50:13 AM EDT
[#35]
Have you watched Crazy Stupid Love yet?
The bar pointers are good The better you look and act confident the girls will follow I suggest paying someone to put together a new wardrobe. Nordstrom and Saks and places Will do this for free Get your self confidence up again...the rest will follow Getting out of a dead end relationship isn't always a bad thing in the end |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 9:57:00 AM EDT
[#36]
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:21:09 AM EDT
[#37]
It will suck for a little while... but trust me when I say... It will get better than before. I'm 46 years old and happier than ever.
My wife of 15 years took off back in January. I dated a couple gals then ran in to an old girlfriend (from 25 years ago) back in April. We've been inseparable ever since and cannot keep our hands off each other. If you dig around in the BOTD section there may still be some pics of her. She is literally HALF the diameter and weight of my ex wife. 
I've got a pretty long thread going in the team area that documents almost my entire ordeal for the last 6 months. Here ya go... 44 pages of drama... http://www.ar15.com/forums/t_1_75/1587905_Never_thought_it_would_happen_to_me_____my_wife_left_me_.html |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:24:15 AM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Dude being single is the coolest. It's like a 7 day weekend. It's like every day is a big 80s rock video. Nobody bothers you. You can do whatever and you can always tell the chick "welp that was fun. Now go home." And you should never trust women. Ever. They are all mercenaries. And to quote the black Army Ranger from the Rock. 'Mercenaries get paid.' http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/496/952/496952/original.jpg Seriously every woman is like the two Army Rangers from The Rock. They are cooler than everyone else. Aloof. Do fun things. But they are mercenaries and mercenaries get paid. Otherwise man just hang out and chill. Call up an old friend. Go make a new one. Go on an adventure. Discover yourself. Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:29:35 AM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
At the risk of old bull/young bull comparison, are you like 23? Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Dude being single is the coolest. It's like a 7 day weekend. It's like every day is a big 80s rock video. Nobody bothers you. You can do whatever and you can always tell the chick "welp that was fun. Now go home." And you should never trust women. Ever. They are all mercenaries. And to quote the black Army Ranger from the Rock. 'Mercenaries get paid.' http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/496/952/496952/original.jpg Seriously every woman is like the two Army Rangers from The Rock. They are cooler than everyone else. Aloof. Do fun things. But they are mercenaries and mercenaries get paid. Otherwise man just hang out and chill. Call up an old friend. Go make a new one. Go on an adventure. Discover yourself. Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. I must confess... At age 46... I have been getting pie WAY more than I ever did as a horny teen or married adult. In the last 90 days... I've only gone a couple days without it because we were just too damn tired to make it happen...
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:31:06 AM EDT
[#40]
OP, I was in almost exactly the same spot as you 4 years ago. 35 years old, marriage of 10 years over, on my own with no clue. It sucks. But trust me, things will get better with time and you'll figure it out. Been married almost 2 years now and life is great. Just give it time and don't try to rush into anything. Don't be afraid to get out and be social but don't try to rush into finding a girlfriend. You have to give it enough time to completely get over the divorce and you're likely going to find yourself trying to fill the hole your ex wife left and that shit isn't healthy.
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:33:58 AM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Not really upset about bing single per say...I just don't know how to do it.
I've been married for 16 years this year. If, god forbid, I were to find myself single tomorrow I would know exaclty how to do it. I would do everything I could to simplify my life, buy a small but nice home and spend my free time traveling and enjoying hobbies. With the kids of course. If you don't have kids then it gets even easier. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:34:13 AM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I must confess... At age 46... I have been getting pie WAY more than I ever did as a horny teen or married adult. In the last 90 days... I've only gone a couple days without it because we were just too damn tired to make it happen... Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Dude being single is the coolest. It's like a 7 day weekend. It's like every day is a big 80s rock video. Nobody bothers you. You can do whatever and you can always tell the chick "welp that was fun. Now go home." And you should never trust women. Ever. They are all mercenaries. And to quote the black Army Ranger from the Rock. 'Mercenaries get paid.' http://cdn.hark.com/images/000/496/952/496952/original.jpg Seriously every woman is like the two Army Rangers from The Rock. They are cooler than everyone else. Aloof. Do fun things. But they are mercenaries and mercenaries get paid. Otherwise man just hang out and chill. Call up an old friend. Go make a new one. Go on an adventure. Discover yourself. Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. I must confess... At age 46... I have been getting pie WAY more than I ever did as a horny teen or married adult. In the last 90 days... I've only gone a couple days without it because we were just too damn tired to make it happen... I also have no problem with Disco's advice...if you're 23. When 45 year old guys try to live like that, the results are just sad. Unless they're uber wealthy. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:36:28 AM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Not really upset about bing single per say...I just don't know how to do it.
cough per se cough |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:37:02 AM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Clearly. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. Not saying this to be ugly, but you sound like kinda of a train wreck yourself. Clearly. OK. You didn't snarl at me to go fuck myself, so... First, getting divorced sucks and it's not going to stop sucking in the next month or two, not if you're a decent human being. You just gotta accept that it's gonna suck for a while, put your head down, and power through it. Second, you need to interact with women, casually, just as other human beings, not as potential hook-ups, or, worse still, potential relationships. I don't mean you should take up quilting, but interpersonal skills are perishable. Pretty difficult to relate to a person, if you can't even comfortably interact with them. Third, if you keep a good heart and keep yourself emotionally accessible, if you don't give into bitterness and resentment, you will live to love again. I did, and so will you. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:41:40 AM EDT
[#45]
Quoted:
No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. I'm in a similar boat. Meh - fuck it - more time and money for guns and stuff. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:47:14 AM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
At the risk of old bull/young bull comparison, are you like 23? Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. I'm in my mid to late 30s. Forgive the breakfast clubbing but, Primus I used to be so straitlaced and everything when I was younger. Like in my 20s, I remember really putting a lot into relationships. Not overbearing not distant. Be a good listener. Be a shoulder. And forgot or didn't realize women change their minds on a dime. They talk to friends or realize one day they 'aren't content'. And you're blindsided. You say "gee you should have said something" and you get an angry "I shouldn't have to!" Like I'm a mind reader. Like hey man you all smiles and skips last week and now life is bad? So....I just got tired of it. And I remember this call for marriage and being told to settle down. Had I done so....yeesh. I do not want to get divorced. Ever. I've seen way too many people go through it. So...I prefer FWB. Look...some of what I said was kinda to sympathize with disappointment. There are some really special women out there. But we all change as people. I know I have. We outgrow each other sometimes. I think about a nice nuclear family life but my personality doesn't lend itself to it. So...I do what I want. I don't want to think I'm a selfish person but if we're going to be on the same page we gotta stay the course. I was told once that love is not a display of affection but rather a test of will. But ...eh life changes. Life happens. It happens to everyone. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:49:03 AM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You both need to step up. I'm 41 and banged a 26yo weekend before last. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Quoted:
No joke. Marriage of 12 years went south, and now I find my self divorced. Being 35 and single kind of sucks. Every woman my age either has kids, is married, or a train wreck. To old to be hanging out in bars, and truth be told, bar skanks are not really my cup of tea. So here I am, trust in women shot, I realized last week that I have not bought clothes for myself in 12 years, now what the hell do I do? I guess it is currency, motorcycles, hot rods, and tattoos for this guy. I'm not much younger than you and I still go clubbing and bang chicks in their mid to early 20's. You're not too old. Step up your game. Lol. You both need to step up. I'm 41 and banged a 26yo weekend before last. Wow, your sister is much younger than you .
I keed I keed.
TXL |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:51:12 AM EDT
[#48]
Remember all of that stuff you wanted to do when you were 14, but you couldn't because either you didn't have enough money or mom wouldn't let you? You know, the stuff you still haven't done, because when you had enough money to do it, your wife said no or made you spend your time and money on hydrangeas, antiquing and romantic comedies?
Well, you can do those things now.
Just don't do anything reeeally stupid. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:52:55 AM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I'm in my mid to late 30s. Forgive the breakfast clubbing but, Primus I used to be so straitlaced and everything when I was younger. Like in my 20s, I remember really putting a lot into relationships. Not overbearing not distant. Be a good listener. Be a shoulder. And forgot or didn't realize women change their minds on a dime. They talk to friends or realize one day they 'aren't content'. And you're blindsided. You say "gee you should have said something" and you get an angry "I shouldn't have to!" Like I'm a mind reader. Like hey man you all smiles and skips last week and now life is bad? So....I just got tired of it. And I remember this call for marriage and being told to settle down. Had I done so....yeesh. I do not want to get divorced. Ever. I've seen way too many people go through it. So...I prefer FWB. Look...some of what I said was kinda to sympathize with disappointment. There are some really special women out there. But we all change as people. I know I have. We outgrow each other sometimes. I think about a nice nuclear family life but my personality doesn't lend itself to it. So...I do what I want. I don't want to think I'm a selfish person but if we're going to be on the same page we gotta stay the course. I was told once that love is not a display of affection but rather a test of will. But ...eh life changes. Life happens. It happens to everyone. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: At the risk of old bull/young bull comparison, are you like 23? Because if you're 45, I think you must be Charlie Sheen. I'm in my mid to late 30s. Forgive the breakfast clubbing but, Primus I used to be so straitlaced and everything when I was younger. Like in my 20s, I remember really putting a lot into relationships. Not overbearing not distant. Be a good listener. Be a shoulder. And forgot or didn't realize women change their minds on a dime. They talk to friends or realize one day they 'aren't content'. And you're blindsided. You say "gee you should have said something" and you get an angry "I shouldn't have to!" Like I'm a mind reader. Like hey man you all smiles and skips last week and now life is bad? So....I just got tired of it. And I remember this call for marriage and being told to settle down. Had I done so....yeesh. I do not want to get divorced. Ever. I've seen way too many people go through it. So...I prefer FWB. Look...some of what I said was kinda to sympathize with disappointment. There are some really special women out there. But we all change as people. I know I have. We outgrow each other sometimes. I think about a nice nuclear family life but my personality doesn't lend itself to it. So...I do what I want. I don't want to think I'm a selfish person but if we're going to be on the same page we gotta stay the course. I was told once that love is not a display of affection but rather a test of will. But ...eh life changes. Life happens. It happens to everyone. |
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Posted: 7/22/2014 10:52:56 AM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
So far the best advise out of this thread has been, , focus on myself and become happy, nail as much strange as possible, and re-do my house as I see fit.
I'll be interested in what the ladies of arfcom have to say during the day shift. I became single in my 30's. I'm still single now. Had a couple of LTR's since the divorce (no kids), one engagement that ended without a marriage (my decision). I date when I find good men, otherwise, I hang out with friends on the weekend, drink, BBQ (I own the Big Green Egg), and I renovate my house and my mom's place. I'm working on the kitchen right now, about to change the hardware out and in April plan on putting in a glass and travertine backsplash. Being by myself doesn't bother me one bit. I like solitude and quiet. Being a single female has taught me a lot of "fix it" skills normally found in handy type men (I fixed the neighbor's light last week while the husband sat in awe). I'm not even sure I'd marry again--I think I'd be okay with just another LTR and no marriage. I don't feel I need a man to "complete" me. |
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