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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:41:16 PM EDT
[#1]
Usually I let them out.
No point storing them. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:41:19 PM EDT
[#2]
I can neither confirm nor deny the occasional crop dusting.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:42:14 PM EDT
[#3]
I especially like to do it when I am with my wife.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:44:40 PM EDT
[#4]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Usually I let them out. No point storing them. 
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:44:43 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I especially like to do it when I am with my wife. I blame them on my wife....
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:45:05 PM EDT
[#6]
I try not to
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:45:51 PM EDT
[#7]
Only around bitchy looking ex sorority girls, past debutantes, and general order trophy wives
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:46:34 PM EDT
[#8]
Only by the perfume counters or near large groups of the elderly.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:46:54 PM EDT
[#9]
Only if there is someone around I can "blame" by sneaking off just as they get in the area...
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:48:20 PM EDT
[#10]
As loud as I can to blame on my GF.
Or in Bath & Body Works as much as I can because it won't ever matter.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:48:29 PM EDT
[#11]
I actually made a little girl in Alabama cry. She was about 3. Just the right height.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:48:48 PM EDT
[#12]
give the wife the ol'
"hang on...............ok let's go" "what? why...OH MY GOD YOU'RE DISGUSTING" 
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:50:04 PM EDT
[#13]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Only if there is someone around I can "blame" by sneaking off just as they get in the area... |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:50:54 PM EDT
[#14]
I do it around old people or if I have the baby no way am I getting blamed.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:52:55 PM EDT
[#15]
only if I can UA and I know it will be (somewhat) SBD.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:53:55 PM EDT
[#16]
I prefer strategic bombing, release and bug out
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:54:49 PM EDT
[#17]
Only while I crop dust FSA in their whopper choppers.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:55:04 PM EDT
[#18]
Cut one , then say 'I smell popcorn" , then everyone takes deep breath.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:57:59 PM EDT
[#19]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
only if I can UA and I know it will be (somewhat) SBD. Most definitely. I don't care to have people look at me and go "Gross." Which is at odds with my love of farts and making people smell them. My favorite is to go into the supermarket in the evening, when I've had a bunch of high-protein foods during the day. Let 'em out in an empty aisle, then move to the next one and try not to laugh when I hear the results of some unfortunate wandering into my stench cloud. And yes, I realize exactly how sophomoric I sound. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:58:29 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
The best part about shopping with the wife. About ten steps ahead of her, unload, and then vacate the area. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Only if there is someone around I can "blame" by sneaking off just as they get in the area... Yup. Especially when you're watching, and someone gets near her and then they keep goving her the "WTF?" looks
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:58:31 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
give the wife the ol' "hang on...............ok let's go" "what? why...OH MY GOD YOU'RE DISGUSTING" |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:59:14 PM EDT
[#22]
simultaneous threads:
- Star Forts - Store Farts Nice 
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Posted: 10/25/2013 12:59:19 PM EDT
[#23]
I let a really bad one go on the moving walkway in Chicago O'Hare Airport. It just lingered there...I looked back and could actually see the moment it hit a pack of young ladies. Or rather, when they hit the fart.
The look on their faces was unmistakable. 
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:03:27 PM EDT
[#24]
All the time. I love doing this but so far my results have been terrible, despite letting some REALLY good ones go. Guess I need to go to stores during a busier time of day.
I don't do it in stores that I am frequently a customer of or that I like, so usually this leaves Walmart as a prime target. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:05:34 PM EDT
[#25]
<crop dusting champion
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:05:59 PM EDT
[#26]
When I let them rip, they are unusually loud. I then just as loudly blame them on my daughter. I've been doing that for quite a while, now she does the same to me.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:06:10 PM EDT
[#27]
Only by the stink bait back in sporting goods. Then I just have to explain why my kids are blowing on the duck calls.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:07:41 PM EDT
[#28]
Can't find the thread, but someone posted about going into WM to buy ammo. He was standing in line with a few others when a bald guy in a security guard uniform approached and loudly cropdusted everyone in line with a smelly fart, obviously as a ploy to disperse the line so that he could buy the ammo he wanted. Weaponized farts. I don't know whether to laugh, be disgusted, or admire the guy.
Yes, I will blow it up in a store, but only if I am sure no one else is around and if I can let it out silently. Has to be a big store so that the odor dissipates rapidly. If I were trying to be gross, I would tear it up only when I am around people I wished to offend. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:09:25 PM EDT
[#29]
Ammo aisle at Academy is one of my regulars. I don't often get over to the electronics section at Walmart but when I do I try to have one ready for the section with the xbox games. Choke on it, console nerds. It's been a while since my last bad flareup but when I do have them you will know I have GI disease by the unholiness of my emissions. I could easily get myself thrown off an aircraft that way.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:10:26 PM EDT
[#30]
For a minute I could have sworn I was dyslexic.
http://i1286.photobucket.com/albums/a607/sampsonite987/Capture_zps61c9011e.jpg |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:12:19 PM EDT
[#31]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Cut one , then say 'I smell popcorn" , then everyone takes deep breath. 
That's funny! |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:13:52 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Cut one , then say 'I smell popcorn" , then everyone takes deep breath. 
Is capturing a fart in your hand and releasing it in front of someones nose socially acceptable? |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:14:27 PM EDT
[#33]
I do them and blame them on my cat.
Now when I crack one of, my 2 yo shouts out "Kitty?" |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:15:59 PM EDT
[#34]
No. I'm a grown man, not a teenage boy.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:19:14 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
No. I'm a grown man, not a teenage boy. That just means they're extra potent. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:23:03 PM EDT
[#36]
Even better in a revolving door.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:25:06 PM EDT
[#37]
Anyone ever rip one as they are parking and close up their vehicle to surprise themselves later?
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:27:00 PM EDT
[#38]
I do not always "Store Farts"
But when I do, I have a disgusted bewildered look on my face, just like everyone else  |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:28:06 PM EDT
[#39]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Is capturing a fart in your hand and releasing it in front of someones nose socially acceptable? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Cut one , then say 'I smell popcorn" , then everyone takes deep breath.
Is capturing a fart in your hand and releasing it in front of someones nose socially acceptable? Buttercupping. Depends on your social status. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:28:24 PM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Is capturing a fart in your hand and releasing it in front of someones nose socially acceptable? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
Cut one , then say 'I smell popcorn" , then everyone takes deep breath.
Is capturing a fart in your hand and releasing it in front of someones nose socially acceptable? Hand grenade. Always funny |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:33:39 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
For a minute I could have sworn I was dyslexic. http://i1286.photobucket.com/albums/a607/sampsonite987/Capture_zps61c9011e.jpg Simplified version. 
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:33:47 PM EDT
[#42]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
simultaneous threads: - Star Forts - Store Farts Nice There should be a rule against similar, confusing thread titles. Not banworthy, but it calls for a timeout IMO.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:36:38 PM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Simplified version.
<a href="http://s86.photobucket.com/user/1811guy2/media/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k81/1811guy2/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg</a> Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
For a minute I could have sworn I was dyslexic. http://i1286.photobucket.com/albums/a607/sampsonite987/Capture_zps61c9011e.jpg Simplified version.
<a href="http://s86.photobucket.com/user/1811guy2/media/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k81/1811guy2/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg</a> That right there is funny, I'll tell you what. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:39:51 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Simplified version.
<a href="http://s86.photobucket.com/user/1811guy2/media/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k81/1811guy2/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg</a> Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
For a minute I could have sworn I was dyslexic. http://i1286.photobucket.com/albums/a607/sampsonite987/Capture_zps61c9011e.jpg Simplified version.
<a href="http://s86.photobucket.com/user/1811guy2/media/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg.html" target="_blank">http://i86.photobucket.com/albums/k81/1811guy2/Untitled2_zpsa531aa7d.jpg</a> Dang, just got done saving my own screenshot of this.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:40:04 PM EDT
[#45]
Nice parody thread.
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:41:18 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
For a minute I could have sworn I was dyslexic. http://i1286.photobucket.com/albums/a607/sampsonite987/Capture_zps61c9011e.jpg Came here to post this. They were side by side when I noticed it. |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:42:20 PM EDT
[#47]
You guys are fucked up! |
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:42:56 PM EDT
[#48]
Star forts
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:43:39 PM EDT
[#49]
Store them in what?!
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Posted: 10/25/2013 1:44:30 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Anyone ever rip one as they are parking and close up their vehicle to surprise themselves later? Not intentionally...but yes 
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