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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:49:46 PM EDT
[#1]
Quoted:
I have had some suspicions about his sexuality for many years. He never showed any real interest interest in girls other than a few cursory glances at their ass or something when we would be at the beach. I noticed the wife, my 17 y/o daughter and him were having alot of hush hush type conversations the last month or so. It is no excuse, but I have been extremely busy w/my own life. It is now the holiday season and I sell guns for the largest gun retailer in the country. On top of that I just finished up the 4.5 month long Criminal Justice Academy and specialized in Emergency Commo operations, 911, dispatch, teletype etc.. so I was working 0900 hours to 1700 hours, then the academy from 1800 hrs to 2230 hrs.  Mon - Thursday.  in addition to that I was interning w/ a few depts to get my observation hours in plus doing sit ins (like a ride along) at other agencies so they could get to know me and I would not be another face in the crowd.
My new career is starting to get traction  in the last week I got two call backs to come in and take the initial CritiCall testing and if I did well on that (no easy feat trust me) I then would move onto the Oral Boards. So today I took another test w/ another big agency (the creme dela creme of all S FL agencies in pay and status) and not only passed the CritiCall but they asked me to stay and meet the Chief and them come back after lunch to sit for the 6 person Oral Interview process.  Usuall there is about a month time lapse btw the test and the Oral but they fast tracked me today...it is a Federal LEO agency so I a fuking psyched. I never thought I had it in me to get in w/the Feds. I also am studying my ass off to pass the FL State Certification exam , 300 questions  on Wed.
So on w/the real issue, I was told to come home and we were having a family meeting at 2200 hours, I am like oh fuk my 17 y/o is preggo (she is on the pill ) so I kinda pushed that aside. The wife opens up w/ saying my 14 y/o has something to come clean about...."Dad I am gay" I have a b/f and we have been seeing each other a few months now.  my wife confirmed this and said this is not a phase but he has had these feelings for as long as he could remember. He also said he thought more than once of killing himself as he is sinning in Gods eyes and for the embarrassment he is bringing upon the family. I was just dumbfounded.
I was concerned more about the suicide part than anything. He is 14 but has so much to give to the world. Every parent thinks their kid is special but he really is. He is 14 and already in high school. He should be in 8th grade but he is graduating next year w/honors. The HS he goes too has 700 kids in his Junior class, he is ranked NO 1...and only just turned 14 Last summer he went to a special program that is invitation only at Princeton and it gives the kids a feel for college life and exposes them to Sci/Math/Chem/Eng. He is already in the National Math Honor Society. He tutors the local college kids in Inorganic/Organic Chem, Physics and Math. He passed a college sophomore level engineering class last summer w/a 104% avg. The class avg was 76%. He charges college kids $50 p/60 mins for advanced Calculus 3 and makes a damn good living doing it,
So back on topic, he told me he is Gay, always has been, feels he is hardwired that way from birth and does not want to be ashamed. My best friend is gay, we have known each other our whole lives and I love him like a brother. I have other gay friends as well, we all agree it is NOT a choice but more or less hardwired into the brain. I told him I loved him as does the whole family and never be ashamed of who you are. He cried for an hour from joy, he them invited his b/f over (who lives close by) he looks just like the Bieber. He confirmed the relationship has been physical and they are very happy together. I told his b/f I am very happy for the two f them and that from now on my house is a "safe zone" for them. They will always be treated w/kindness and respect and I will provide what ever they need to feel safe from bullies, bigots, assholes etc..I hugged both of them and took some pics and let them know I am avail 24/7 So any other comments from the hive on how to handle this other than the way I have been doing , thx. Very well done Dad. You did everything right as far as I can tell |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:49:56 PM EDT
[#2]
Quote HistoryQuoted: If my 14 son was banging anyone I'd be upset. Kids are too young to be able to handle that. i had sex for the 1st time at 14 with a girl down the street. and it was nothing about 'now a days'...it was 1985 |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:50:21 PM EDT
[#3]
He's your blood, 'nuff said.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:51:13 PM EDT
[#4]
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Birds of a feather shit on member together.  Quote HistoryQuoted:
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lol holy shit Haha I love this response Birds of a feather shit on member together. What can I say it made me laugh what do you want from me |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:51:18 PM EDT
[#5]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I'm not entirely sure at what age appropriate healthy physical relationships should begin. However, is it not at 14, and certainty not with a member of the same sex. Also, it is apparent that the OP does not take a large enough part in his children's lives, as he said so in the OP. I mean, his wife and daughter have known about this for how long and were keeping it from him? Especially with his wife keeping "secrets" from him, OP has a lot more to worry about than his son deciding he is gay. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone.  It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant. Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. and at what age did you get your first physical contact at? what do you think the societal norm is today? they've already been bumping uglies. would you stop banging some chick you were dating because your parents told you not to? didn't think so. like it or not, it's happening. the best thing he can do is teach him to be safe and hope he makes smart decisions in the future. I'm not entirely sure at what age appropriate healthy physical relationships should begin. However, is it not at 14, and certainty not with a member of the same sex. Also, it is apparent that the OP does not take a large enough part in his children's lives, as he said so in the OP. I mean, his wife and daughter have known about this for how long and were keeping it from him? Especially with his wife keeping "secrets" from him, OP has a lot more to worry about than his son deciding he is gay. So you didn't feel more comfortable talking to one parent about certain topics than the other? Yeah, uh huh  Maybe the kid felt like he should be the one to tell his father man to man than have him find out through the grapevine. Dude, gtfo  |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:51:23 PM EDT
[#6]
Is there a question you have here? BC you just started your thread by making excuses (quite defensive) for why you haven't been there as a father, then you end with you're ok with his decision, etc.
Here's my take. Your son is a genius. Highly Intelligent, all that. You aren't around much as a father. You know/are ok with the fact that your kids are promiscuous. You don't take God's word at face value. You'd think I'm a bigot. I'd say your son is right up the alley for college/liberal life. Good luck to him. I'll pray that you all have a spiritual awakening at some point because it sounds like you may need it. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:51:51 PM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You did a great job OP. in before the wacko Christian homophobes. THANK YOU EVERYBODY this was never covered in the dad handbook. I mean I am just speechless, I am upset inside, face it, gays have a very difficult life. They get beaten, raped, killed, etc..just for who they are. I am so scared fro my boy to get dragged into an alley and have his caved in w/ a bat while they yell faggot or something. He literally does not have an evil bone in his body. He will do his best to help those in need, many times if he sees his clients drive up the to house in a ratty car or it needs repair, he will think up an excuse to not take their $$$. He will say "oh you know what I dont have change today so this one is on the house " he wont say "your car is on its last leg, so put your $$ towards that" he feels that people will look at it like charity from a 14 y/o and that in turn will hurt their self esteem even more. I mean he is so considerate of everyone I am amazed. I taught him to respect all and believe in karma but he takes it to a whole new level. He wants to get his Phd in Mech Engineering by the time he is 22 
In all reality he will start college here locally next year at 15 y/o then goto either MIT and study miniaturization/robotics or Carnegie Mellon and do the PhD thing. He already has letters from MIT to tour the campus, so we are going this summer, all expenses paid I cannot imaging my son going to MIT at 15..he told me that gay bashing is really non existent when you get to this level of TIER 1 HSLD education levels. I pary its true. I am so worried for his safety, he is a big kid, bigger than me. He is a solid 6ft and 198 lbs, all muscle and upper body but he is a gentle giant. he also HATES guns and violence,,dammit
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:52:12 PM EDT
[#8]
I'm not sure what you're looking for here OP, your're cool with it, so who cares what anyone else thinks?
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:52:43 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Yup, cause kids never go and do their own thing anyway. Amiright or amiright? Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone. It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant.
Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. Yup, cause kids never go and do their own thing anyway. Amiright or amiright? This, the age kids are becoming intimate with eachother these days is just getting younger and younger. I had a great upbringing in an upper middleclass household with very christian parents. Disnt stop me from getting some tail when I wanted too
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:52:46 PM EDT
[#10]
Contemplated suicide? I know there are lots of ways to do it, but this should be a big red flag to make sure all your firearms are secured if they're not already.
I wouldn't be happy my 14 year old was sexually active, but it's not my kid so.... ETA: I'm also wondering based on follow up post if this might be trolling. 
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:53:48 PM EDT
[#11]
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What can I say it made me laugh what do you want from me Quote HistoryQuoted:
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lol holy shit Haha I love this response Birds of a feather shit on member together. What can I say it made me laugh what do you want from me That you grow the fuck up? Log out and never come back? That you choke yourself? Those are the CoC compliant suggestions. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:54:28 PM EDT
[#12]
Before I got to the end of your post, I thought you'd end it with "what should I do"?
My answer was going to simply be: "love him" Looks like you've got that covered. Not sure I'd be ok with a physical relationship at only age 14, but as far as these things go you've done well. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:55:00 PM EDT
[#13]
I took all the obvious bragging out of the post, OP, and here is what I got: My son is gay, I hugged his boyfriend.
Was there a question? Or were you just looking for some approbation? Sounds like you raised a genius. Congratulations? ETA: Smells like troll in here. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:55:38 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted: *snip* he also HATES guns and violence,,dammit Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: You did a great job OP. in before the wacko Christian homophobes. *snip* he also HATES guns and violence,,dammit Maybe work on that part |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:56:09 PM EDT
[#15]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
That you grow the fuck up? Log out and never come back? That you choke yourself? Those are the CoC compliant suggestions. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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lol holy shit Haha I love this response Birds of a feather shit on member together. What can I say it made me laugh what do you want from me That you grow the fuck up? Log out and never come back? That you choke yourself? Those are the CoC compliant suggestions. I take it you can relate to the OP? Were you the dad or the son? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:57:43 PM EDT
[#16]
It's really not a big deal. He's still your son, he's still the same person you've known his entire life. Love him, encourage him, and be a good father. It took an incredible amount of courage for him to come out to you. Admire that strength.
Yeah, it's probably going to be a weird and rough time for you to adjust to it, especially if you weren't expecting it. But really, it's not a big deal. Far better to have some awkward conversations and situations than the alternative he mentioned. Remember that. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 9:57:52 PM EDT
[#17]
And I thought my 18 y/o was weird for liking only asian (philipino) girls. I would be more concerned with the suicide thoughts.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:00:33 PM EDT
[#18]
Did you let him know you want him on birth control like his sister?
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:01:14 PM EDT
[#19]
As much as everyone is going to deride me. The progressives are sure out tonight. 30 years from now I just can imagine the thread titles on arfcom, "Hey my daughter and son are going at it whatevs"
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:01:27 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Did you let him know you want him on birth control like his sister?
his bf looks like Justin bieber. I assume that means he's the pitcher
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:01:43 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I took all the obvious bragging out of the post, OP, and here is what I got: My son is gay, I hugged his boyfriend. Was there a question? Or were you just looking for some approbation? Sounds like you raised a genius. Congratulations? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:01:53 PM EDT
[#22]
Hey, he's your son and always will be. It's better that he's told you who he is now than say 20 years from now.
You've always loved him and always will. Doesn't mean you can't disagree with the choices he makes in relationships, life decisions; just as you would if he were straight. Just for God's sake tell him you'll disown him if he gets those stupid fucking "gauge" things in his ears!!! lol |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:01:54 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I wouldn't have said it like this but there's a lot of truth in this statement. Also you seem way too preoccupied and consumed by your own life with kids in some parts of a crisis Quote HistoryQuoted:
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How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone. It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant.
Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. Also you seem way too preoccupied and consumed by your own life with kids in some parts of a crisis I very much agree with you, very much. I have become so hell bent on my own career path I lost track of what was going on on the homefront..GUILTY as charged. With that said, my daughter is going on 18 soon and has the same (and only b/f) since she turned 15. 3 years dating the same guy !!! you think after all that time nature will not win out over my morality clause in her life...come on get real. It is parents that think like that that have daughters end up on MTV 16 and pregnant  It was not easy but in the end I make sure she she takes the pill everyday. I choose to be Pro active, thats all.
My son and his 14 y/o partner have only kissed so BFD, I am sure it will escalte at some point but he is so centered on his academics, any b/f will always play second fiddle to that. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:02:15 PM EDT
[#24]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Did you let him know you want him on birth control like his sister? So...laxatives? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:02:37 PM EDT
[#25]
I think 14 is too young for sex. Obviously there's no risk of pregnancy, but there are STDs, and emotional ramifications. Although your kid sounds brilliant, he's still only 14.
Also ask your best friend about some of the weirdness in gay culture that your son should wary of, if you don't already know about it yourself, so you can warn your boy/guide him. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:02:56 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
And I thought my 18 y/o was weird for liking only asian (philipino) girls. I would be more concerned with the suicide thoughts. Your kid know he is playing with fire? Cross one, and the machete comes out. He should pick one of the softer gentler aisian or pacific islander groups to dote on. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:03:24 PM EDT
[#27]
In all seriousness, it sounds like your son might need some attention. "Contemplating suicide", being homosexual, etc. seem to indicate attention-seeking behavior. And you began your post by making excuses for why you haven't been giving him any attention...
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:05:22 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
As much as everyone is going to deride me. The progressives are sure out tonight. 30 years from now I just can imagine the thread titles on arfcom, "Hey my daughter and son are going at it whatevs" Hiram ranger will be along shortly to chide you |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:05:27 PM EDT
[#29]
Everyone gets a trophy.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:05:37 PM EDT
[#30]
For a minute there, I though you were going to tell us he was a democrat.
Dodged the bullet on that one. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:06:56 PM EDT
[#31]
at 15 my stepdaughter came out As a lesbian she told us the same thing that she was born that way then recently at 21 she came out again as straight. Go figure.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:08:07 PM EDT
[#32]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone. It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant.
Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. Okay westboro. 
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:08:17 PM EDT
[#33]
My guess is 20 pages.
Everything from FPNI to "the bible says death to men who lay with men" or whatever it says. You need to spend some time with your son. Good luck. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:08:22 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Everyone gets a trophy. Um, what? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:09:05 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Um, what? Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Everyone gets a trophy. Um, what? Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:10:07 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Everyone gets a trophy.
Um, what? Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. You're brutal. I love it |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:10:10 PM EDT
[#37]
Wish I was that smart. Brains skipped a generation with me.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:10:11 PM EDT
[#38]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Sounds like you love your kid and accept him. That's the best thing you can give him. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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I have had some suspicions about his sexuality for many years. He never showed any real interest interest in girls other than a few cursory glances at their ass or something when we would be at the beach. I noticed the wife, my 17 y/o daughter and him were having alot of hush hush type conversations the last month or so. It is no excuse, but I have been extremely busy w/my own life. It is now the holiday season and I sell guns for the largest gun retailer in the country. On top of that I just finished up the 4.5 month long Criminal Justice Academy and specialized in Emergency Commo operations, 911, dispatch, teletype etc.. so I was working 0900 hours to 1700 hours, then the academy from 1800 hrs to 2230 hrs. Mon - Thursday. in addition to that I was interning w/ a few depts to get my observation hours in plus doing sit ins (like a ride along) at other agencies so they could get to know me and I would not be another face in the crowd.
My new career is starting to get traction in the last week I got two call backs to come in and take the initial CritiCall testing and if I did well on that (no easy feat trust me) I then would move onto the Oral Boards. So today I took another test w/ another big agency (the creme dela creme of all S FL agencies in pay and status) and not only passed the CritiCall but they asked me to stay and meet the Chief and them come back after lunch to sit for the 6 person Oral Interview process. Usuall there is about a month time lapse btw the test and the Oral but they fast tracked me today...it is a Federal LEO agency so I a fuking psyched. I never thought I had it in me to get in w/the Feds. I also am studying my ass off to pass the FL State Certification exam , 300 questions on Wed.
So on w/the real issue, I was told to come home and we were having a family meeting at 2200 hours, I am like oh fuk my 17 y/o is preggo (she is on the pill ) so I kinda pushed that aside. The wife opens up w/ saying my 14 y/o has something to come clean about...."Dad I am gay" I have a b/f and we have been seeing each other a few months now. my wife confirmed this and said this is not a phase but he has had these feelings for as long as he could remember. He also said he thought more than once of killing himself as he is sinning in Gods eyes and for the embarrassment he is bringing upon the family. I was just dumbfounded.
I was concerned more about the suicide part than anything. He is 14 but has so much to give to the world. Every parent thinks their kid is special but he really is. He is 14 and already in high school. He should be in 8th grade but he is graduating next year w/honors. The HS he goes too has 700 kids in his Junior class, he is ranked NO 1...and only just turned 14 Last summer he went to a special program that is invitation only at Princeton and it gives the kids a feel for college life and exposes them to Sci/Math/Chem/Eng. He is already in the National Math Honor Society. He tutors the local college kids in Inorganic/Organic Chem, Physics and Math. He passed a college sophomore level engineering class last summer w/a 104% avg. The class avg was 76%. He charges college kids $50 p/60 mins for advanced Calculus 3 and makes a damn good living doing it,
So back on topic, he told me he is Gay, always has been, feels he is hardwired that way from birth and does not want to be ashamed. My best friend is gay, we have known each other our whole lives and I love him like a brother. I have other gay friends as well, we all agree it is NOT a choice but more or less hardwired into the brain. I told him I loved him as does the whole family and never be ashamed of who you are. He cried for an hour from joy, he them invited his b/f over (who lives close by) he looks just like the Bieber. He confirmed the relationship has been physical and they are very happy together. So any other comments from the hive on how to handle this other than the way I have been doing , thx. Sounds like you love your kid and accept him. That's the best thing you can give him. First post nails it again. OP Is a man among men for supporting his son, and posting here about it. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:10:15 PM EDT
[#39]
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Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Everyone gets a trophy.
Um, what? Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. Spikes lowers for everyone? 
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:11:03 PM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
at 15 my stepdaughter came out As a lesbian she told us the same thing that she was born that way then recently at 21 she came out again as straight. Go figure. Pics? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:13:18 PM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Pics? Quote HistoryQuoted:
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at 15 my stepdaughter came out As a lesbian she told us the same thing that she was born that way then recently at 21 she came out again as straight. Go figure. Pics? She is actually a pretty girl now that she doesn't dress and look like Justin Bieber. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:15:05 PM EDT
[#42]
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She is actually a pretty girl now that she doesn't dress and look like Justin Bieber. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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at 15 my stepdaughter came out As a lesbian she told us the same thing that she was born that way then recently at 21 she came out again as straight. Go figure. Pics? She is actually a pretty girl now that she doesn't dress and look like Justin Bieber. pics? |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:16:26 PM EDT
[#43]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
says who? you? 14 year olds have been getting married and cranking out children for thousands of years. do some research on colonial America. you are right tho. if he "bans them from having sex" they wont do it anymore. and gun control works. Quote HistoryQuoted:
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How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone. It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant.
Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. and at what age did you get your first physical contact at? what do you think the societal norm is today? they've already been bumping uglies. would you stop banging some chick you were dating because your parents told you not to? didn't think so. like it or not, it's happening. the best thing he can do is teach him to be safe and hope he makes smart decisions in the future. I'm not entirely sure at what age appropriate healthy physical relationships should begin. However, is it not at 14, and certainty not with a member of the same sex. Also, it is apparent that the OP does not take a large enough part in his children's lives, as he said so in the OP. I mean, his wife and daughter have known about this for how long and were keeping it from him? Especially with his wife keeping "secrets" from him, OP has a lot more to worry about than his son deciding he is gay. says who? you? 14 year olds have been getting married and cranking out children for thousands of years. do some research on colonial America. you are right tho. if he "bans them from having sex" they wont do it anymore. and gun control works. Hey in those good old bible times 14 year olds would be getting married.
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:16:28 PM EDT
[#44]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Spikes lowers for everyone? http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_pKcB8A-v9wU/S9h1wBVZWNI/AAAAAAAAAug/hTHtHdrsMdI/s1600/Spikes+Tactical+Lower.jpg Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: Quoted: Quoted: Everyone gets a trophy. Um, what? Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. Spikes lowers for everyone? http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_pKcB8A-v9wU/S9h1wBVZWNI/AAAAAAAAAug/hTHtHdrsMdI/s1600/Spikes+Tactical+Lower.jpg |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:17:07 PM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Everyone gets a trophy.
Um, what? Penis-shaped trophies, for everyone. Spikes lowers for everyone? http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_pKcB8A-v9wU/S9h1wBVZWNI/AAAAAAAAAug/hTHtHdrsMdI/s1600/Spikes+Tactical+Lower.jpg
Hey, I wouldn't say no to a free one. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:20:23 PM EDT
[#46]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
In all seriousness, it sounds like your son might need some attention. "Contemplating suicide", being homosexual, etc. seem to indicate attention-seeking behavior. And you began your post by making excuses for why you haven't been giving him any attention... AGREE...I have been very self centered, maybe this is Gods way of bringing me back to my center. I am a workaholic, always have been, always will be. I got it from my dad. Now dad was a very abusive, hostile, Republican, Georgia Blue Blood. I cannot imagine if I was gay and had to come out to him, he would have killed me, sure as shit. Seriously, my kid even asked if grandpa would try and "hurt him". Over my many yrs in medicine, it is the guys who never could be true to themselves that got got buried in Drugs/ETOH and it ruined their lives. I am damned if that happen to my family. I am having my gay best friend come over this weekend to talk w/him so that should be interested. Of course the kid had clients all weekend so he will have to fit him in after 7p. He makes about $40K a year which ges to his college fund at this point. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:21:15 PM EDT
[#47]
Quote HistoryQuoted: and at what age did you get your first physical contact at? what do you think the societal norm is today? they've already been bumping uglies. would you stop banging some chick you were dating because your parents told you not to? didn't think so. like it or not, it's happening. the best thing he can do is teach him to be safe and hope he makes smart decisions in the future. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: How are you okay with your 14 year old son having a physical relationship with another male? Way to encourage reprehensible behavior, a 14 year old should not be having a physical relationship with anyone. It says a lot about a parent, when a family meeting makes you think your daughter, who is on birth control at 17, is pregnant. Good job on instilling morals and integrity on those kids of yours. and at what age did you get your first physical contact at? what do you think the societal norm is today? they've already been bumping uglies. would you stop banging some chick you were dating because your parents told you not to? didn't think so. like it or not, it's happening. the best thing he can do is teach him to be safe and hope he makes smart decisions in the future. It's not like he's gonna knock him up. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:22:19 PM EDT
[#48]
Good, OP.
Sounds like a good kid, who was just terrified of what YOUR reaction would be. In my opinion, your reaction is/was the correct one. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:23:17 PM EDT
[#49]
So any other comments from the hive on how to handle this other than the way I have been doing , thx.
I had a longer response typed up and then said forget it. Anyway, as someone else above me posted, spend some time with your son. Every gay guy that I have talked to ( granted, not that many ) said they either had a shit relationship with their father or had no father. Your family dynamics seem to be a little off ........ for my tastes. |
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Posted: 10/21/2013 10:24:09 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Hey, I wouldn't say no to a free one. 
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