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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:44:14 PM EDT
[#1]
Man that sucks... I'm sorry to hear that.
Is there anything I can do for you guys over there to cheer anyone up? *edit* I'll raid my aunts liquor store for hot chick beer posts to hang up 
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:45:10 PM EDT
[#2]
At least they have you, and you care. That has to help. Stay solid.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:46:18 PM EDT
[#3]
Been there
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:49:50 PM EDT
[#4]
I know this may or may not be helpful, but he CAN open up a USAA account today, right now, online. If they have any shared accounts with them right now, tell him to call or email them NOW to get this on record as a sep/div account and see if they can get the POA revoked.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:52:29 PM EDT
[#5]
One more to add to the Hog Board.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:53:00 PM EDT
[#6]
A "man" fucking another man's wife is 100% unacceptable. I could never be friends or trust a guy who knowingly slept with another man's wife. Also fuck her. People are shitty and can't keep it in their pants.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:53:05 PM EDT
[#7]
Tomorrow will be better.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:53:49 PM EDT
[#8]
Wow. Sorry to hear it. Had a guy in my squad when we were in Saudi Arabia for Desert Shield get a Dear John. His wife had power of attorney. She cleaned him out by the time things got straightened out.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:54:37 PM EDT
[#9]
is there a way to pull or cancel a power of attorney? without physically getting a hold of the document?
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:55:24 PM EDT
[#10]
Quoted: ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.  Adultery is reason enough for court martial, yes? And isn't it also grounds for a dishonorable discharge? |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:56:26 PM EDT
[#11]
Some women are just horrible...... but so are some men.
Some people are just horrible. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:57:52 PM EDT
[#12]
Quoted: well, it is pretty fuckin dishonorableQuoted: ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top. Adultery is reason enough for court martial, yes? And isn't it also grounds for a dishonorable discharge? |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 1:58:46 PM EDT
[#13]
Well that sucks.
Here's hoping he doesn't have any alimony tickets by her... er kids. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:00:59 PM EDT
[#14]
Thoughts and prayers are with you and your troops
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:01:27 PM EDT
[#15]
If the guy she is sleeping with is in the military can't you pursue UCMJ action? I sure would.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:02:15 PM EDT
[#16]
Glad to see the edit anyway. 23 is young, while this will be devistating he will get through it and be a better person for it. Still sucks.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:03:46 PM EDT
[#17]
What kind of Dbag, that is a soldier, does that to another soldier? I know it takes two, but screw that guy.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:09:05 PM EDT
[#18]
Airman in the shop next to me had his wife have a miscarriage.
At least, that's what she told him. He found the abortion receipt. They separated, and she cleaned his bank account out. She said she "needed it to file for divorce and stuff." When I was an Airman, another Airman in my sister Flight (opposing 12 hr shifts) committed suicide over a chick that decided she didn't want to be engaged anymore He was a good dude. He bought a pistol at the Elmendorf BX and shot himself in the face in the parking lot.People in the military have some fucked up situations. Help your troop through this one.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:09:13 PM EDT
[#19]
Will be interested to see what happens to the douche that stole your buddy's wife
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:10:33 PM EDT
[#20]
Quoted:
My subordinate, my troop, my airmen, and my friend was told by his wife that she isn't happy and wants to leave him. Supposedly she has been seeing another man nearly twice her age who is also in the military. Greatest part of all, we are deployed. Things unfolded extremely quickly last night and I learned about it today. She has power of attorney over nearly everything. My supervisor, my troop and I all had a discussion of steps he should take. I of course brought up a lawyer, JAG, extension. And we mentioned to move his money into another account. But it's the weekend, so it will be difficult to open a new account right this moment. I cannot imagine what he's going through as a 23 year old, as I am not married and am only 24. This kid has a bright future, he's a genius and has all his ducks in a row. He is striving for amazing goals and I have helped him as best I can the whole time I've known him. This is one of the good guys. But now I feel helpless to him. I wish I could do more. I would give this kid the shirt off my back and have told him such. I told him to let me know of there is anything I can do for him. I just wish I could do more..... To top it all off, I got another guy whose sister attempted suicide and is in an induced coma, another who has been crying himself to sleep because of wife issues, another home had a daughter within the past few hours and was in Afghanistan for it. Today sucked. Fuck you December 1st, 2012. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top. FRY HIS ASS.....IF HES TWICE HIS AGE HES GOTTA BE E7ISH..........HE KNOWS BETTER.......as for your troop....hell get thru it, we all do.....been there, lost a girlfriend to a reservist while I was half way around the world..........we weren't married and he was a cop in the world so couldn't do shit if I wanted to.......this was back in the stone ages........... |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:11:03 PM EDT
[#21]
That Misandry article that's been floating around seems to make more and more sense the more stories I hear...
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:12:23 PM EDT
[#22]
Quoted:
is there a way to pull or cancel a power of attorney? without physically getting a hold of the document? I believe all that's required is that you write a new one, legitimaized through notary or lawyer or otherwise, declaring the old null and void or that you simply write a declaration that the power of attorney is considered null and void along with ensuring that the party woth the power of attorney is made aware of it throught he use of legal sevice or certified letter. I could be wrong and I would imagine that there may be more to it. The lawyers will be along sooner or later to set it straight. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:14:43 PM EDT
[#23]
OP, not to be a dick, but get used to it.
If you plan on staying in the military for awhile, these things are pretty damn common. Use this event as a lesson for future issues with your people. Take notes of some of the systematic steps he has to go through in order to get them separated and avoid the incessant non support phone calls from the spouse to the chain of command. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:17:53 PM EDT
[#24]
Happens a lot I'm sorry so say. The fact that it was another soldier is despicable. He should have the shit kicked out of him by his entire unit.
In my single days I was at a small party and was naked in a hot tub with two chicks(no action  ) One was a fatty and one was hot as shit with huge boobs. Anyway I found out later that night that she was married to a guy in Iraq and hasn't worn her ring at the bars in a while but has no intentions of leaving him. I called her a slut and the fatty threw a drink on me so i tipped over her fish tank. Cops came, I ran into the woods, end of story.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:18:24 PM EDT
[#25]
Y'all shouldn't have to deal with crap like this. You have enough to worry about. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:18:27 PM EDT
[#26]
This is a bad time for old Soldiers to be banging young Soldiers wives. heh.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:19:06 PM EDT
[#27]
Quoted:
Happens a lot I'm sorry so say. The fact that it was another soldier is despicable. He should have the shit kicked out of him by his entire unit. In my single days I was at a small party and was naked in a hot tub with two chicks(no action ) One was a fatty and one was hot as shit with huge boobs. Anyway I found out later that night that she was married to a guy in Iraq. I called her a slut and the fatty threw a drink on me so i tipped over her fish tank. Cops came, I ran into the woods, end of story.I love short stories with happy endings. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:19:29 PM EDT
[#28]
Quoted:
My subordinate, my troop, my airmen, and my friend was told by his wife that she isn't happy and wants to leave him. Supposedly she has been seeing another man nearly twice her age who is also in the military. Greatest part of all, we are deployed. Things unfolded extremely quickly last night and I learned about it today. She has power of attorney over nearly everything. My supervisor, my troop and I all had a discussion of steps he should take. I of course brought up a lawyer, JAG, extension. And we mentioned to move his money into another account. But it's the weekend, so it will be difficult to open a new account right this moment. I cannot imagine what he's going through as a 23 year old, as I am not married and am only 24. This kid has a bright future, he's a genius and has all his ducks in a row. He is striving for amazing goals and I have helped him as best I can the whole time I've known him. This is one of the good guys. But now I feel helpless to him. I wish I could do more. I would give this kid the shirt off my back and have told him such. I told him to let me know of there is anything I can do for him. I just wish I could do more..... To top it all off, I got another guy whose sister attempted suicide and is in an induced coma, another who has been crying himself to sleep because of wife issues, another home had a daughter within the past few hours and was in Afghanistan for it. Today sucked. Fuck you December 1st, 2012. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top. Does that extra year give you so much experience that he's a "kid" in your eyes? Growing up an Army brat and then joining the USMC myself, I know that military life ain't easy. Being away sucks alot. I hope he gets thru this without getting screwed too badly. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:20:10 PM EDT
[#29]
Quoted:
OP, not to be a dick, but get used to it. If you plan on staying in the military for awhile, these things are pretty damn common. Use this event as a lesson for future issues with your people. Take notes of some of the systematic steps he has to go through in order to get them separated and avoid the incessant non support phone calls from the spouse to the chain of command. Yea, unfortunate fact of military life. Magnified by deployments and base housing soap operas |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:21:50 PM EDT
[#30]
I don't care whether it's a private or Petraeus or anyone in between or anyone anywhere else in the world, adultery is unacceptable.
FWIW, my father got a 'dear john' type divorce from his first wife. I think he was in Germany, sometime around 1970 or so. I don't remember all the details (it was before my birth by several years). I do know that the ex-wife got full custody of their daughter and remarried quickly thereafter and the daughter (my half-sister) grew up being told her dad abandoned her, and my dad tried for years to rebuild a relationship but she just never wanted anything to do with him. It eats at him to this day. Last year he was contacted by some of her family with a request for a blood sample; she has some weird disease and is dying of it and they wanted a blood sample from him for something. After they asked for the blood sample they told him she still didn't want to see him. 
Messed up stuff. I don't envy the guy going through this now.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:22:54 PM EDT
[#31]
the bank should have a 24hr contact number. Have him call it and tell the bank he has revoked his POA and freeze his account for 72 hrs or however long it would take him to get a new account. Get the CO involved if need be send the troop back for a few days to get stuff straight. FRG and rear D can help him move his stuff. He might work it out but better to CYA
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:23:12 PM EDT
[#32]
Quoted:
My subordinate, my troop, my airmen, and my friend was told by his wife that she isn't happy and wants to leave him. Supposedly she has been seeing another man nearly twice her age who is also in the military. Greatest part of all, we are deployed. UCMJ Rape party! Tell him to lay down the the law. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:23:39 PM EDT
[#33]
Not to trivialize events, but it is called life. Sometimes these experiences are necessary for the good to manifest.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:24:11 PM EDT
[#34]
Quoted:
Quoted:
ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Adultery is reason enough for court martial, yes? And isn't it also grounds for a dishonorable discharge? |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:24:31 PM EDT
[#35]
Quoted:
<snip>...Like just shy of the president top. That shit sucks. I've been there for my guys too when shit went south. I always felt like I was helpless. I can't shoot it or slap a bandage on it so it fucks with me. On a side note, I imagine that what you posted above is in the spot light due to the rash of flag officers getting hemmed up for it lately. I hope they crush the other guy. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:27:10 PM EDT
[#36]
Yup. Bitches be trippin'.
The burden of leadership can weigh heavy sometimes. Make sure you're always there for him, good luck. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:28:31 PM EDT
[#37]
Please continue to keep a close eye on your men.
I have seen way too many service members commit suicide over an unfaithful spouse. Don't be afraid to ask for help from others to take care of your guys. Monk |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:29:14 PM EDT
[#38]
Quoted: Yep. Hope the POS is calling the private guarding his ass in the brig "Sir" by the end of the week.Quoted: <snip>...Like just shy of the president top. That shit sucks. I've been there for my guys too when shit went south. I always felt like I was helpless. I can't shoot it or slap a bandage on it so it fucks with me. On a side note, I imagine that what you posted above is in the spot light due to the rash of flag officers getting hemmed up for it lately. I hope they crush the other guy. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:31:54 PM EDT
[#39]
I had a friend whose wife divorced him while we were in Afghanistan. He sort of got blindsided and was really taking it hard.
What really helped him get over his wife was her trying to transfer everything out of his bank account the next day. It took him about ten seconds to go from some sobbing fool who I didn't think was going recover for a long time to a completely new man. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Well that sounds interesting. Can you elaborate? |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:39:46 PM EDT
[#40]
Quoted:
I had a friend whose wife divorced him while we were in Afghanistan. He sort of got blindsided and was really taking it hard. What really helped him get over his wife was her trying to transfer everything out of his bank account the next day. It took him about ten seconds to go from some sobbing fool who I didn't think was going recover for a long time to a completely new man. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Well that sounds interesting. Can you elaborate? Hate is a great tool to recover from that.............trust me |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:40:43 PM EDT
[#41]
In many states he can sue the other guy for something like marital distress... if the other guy knew the woman was married at the time. And this can become nasty for the other guy, I know one guy who basically went through a divorce with the husband getting the better end of the deal in trade for his wife. Fucking around with a married woman can be a dangerous thing if the husband gets a good lawyer.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:42:54 PM EDT
[#42]
Quoted:
is there a way to pull or cancel a power of attorney? without physically getting a hold of the document? This is my big question. I haven't had a POA before, is this possible? Also, to those that mentioned it. I know this is life, and I know it happens all the time. But no, I will NOT get used to it, and I choose not to. I will continue to allow it to piss me off to no end, especially if it keeps me motivated to find a conclusion for my troop. I come here for help, or suggestions on how to help. Also, the other individual is an E7. He is supposedly all ready getting a dishonorable discharge. With all the people on board with this investigation though, he'll likely never enjoy another weekend after this one. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:48:41 PM EDT
[#43]
Quoted:
ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Well that sounds interesting. Can you elaborate? Well, watching the traffic of the MFR we sent out trying to get the guy home, it's been passed on to the AFCENT commander, four star and just about everyone else in the AOR. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 2:49:33 PM EDT
[#44]
A quick google search came up with this
Q: When can I revoke my Power of Attorney? A: A Power of Attorney can be revoked at any time, regardless of the termination date specified in the document, as long as the Principal is mentally capable. (Note: there are some exceptions, but these apply only to "binding" Powers of Attorney. LawDepot does not provide forms for binding Powers of Attorney on our web site). Q: Can I still revoke my Power of Attorney if I become incompetent? A: An ordinary power of attorney is automatically revoked if the person who made it is found to be incompetent, but a durable/enduring power of attorney can only be revoked by the person who made it while that person is mentally competent. Q: Do I have to specify why I am revoking my Power of Attorney? A: You are not required to explain why you are revoking your Power of Attorney. As long as you are mentally capable, you can revoke your Power of Attorney for any reason (or for no reason). Q. How will my Revocation of Power of Attorney become effective? A: In order to give effect to your Revocation you must complete the following steps: Have your Revocation witnessed or acknowledged before a notary; Provide a copy of your Revocation to your Attorney-in-fact and ask him/her to return all of his/her copies of the Power of Attorney; Provide a copy of your Revocation to any financial institutions or any other third parties where your Power of Attorney may have been used; and Provide a copy of your Revocation to any agency where your Power of Attorney has been recorded (e.g. County Clerk's Office, deed registry or land titles office). Link Monk |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:02:20 PM EDT
[#45]
Quoted:
I had a friend whose wife divorced him while we were in Afghanistan. He sort of got blindsided and was really taking it hard. What really helped him get over his wife was her trying to transfer everything out of his bank account the next day. It took him about ten seconds to go from some sobbing fool who I didn't think was going recover for a long time to a completely new man. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Well that sounds interesting. Can you elaborate? I'm betting that the older soldier wasn't an E-7.... |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:06:26 PM EDT
[#46]
Quoted:
Quoted:
My subordinate, my troop, my airmen, and my friend was told by his wife that she isn't happy and wants to leave him. Supposedly she has been seeing another man nearly twice her age who is also in the military. Greatest part of all, we are deployed. UCMJ Rape party! Tell him to lay down the the law. This....need to find out who the other guy is and contact his command. Prolly won't go over well that he is stealing another serviceman's wife. edit...just saw the OP edit....hope the bastard rots in the brig for a while. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:11:39 PM EDT
[#47]
Quoted:
Quoted:
is there a way to pull or cancel a power of attorney? without physically getting a hold of the document? This is my big question. I haven't had a POA before, is this possible? especially if it keeps me motivated to find a conclusion for my troop. I come here for help, or suggestions on how to help. OP, you mentioned you were deployed. Knowing that you are AF, you are probably at a large base with a full up JAG office. You need to go there. Or hell, knock on the legal dick's CHU or something. He's going to need to notify the spouse and any private accounts of the revoked POA. If he hasn't done it already, he needs to remove money(except for what the spouse gets for support) from joint bank accounts, change his mypay pins, and all money related passwords. and pissed off or not, you still need to get used to it. If you don't learn a lesson from it, you will be going through the same growing pains when your next guy has the same issue. |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:12:03 PM EDT
[#48]
1994 that was me in the Army. I feel for him.
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:14:34 PM EDT
[#49]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I had a friend whose wife divorced him while we were in Afghanistan. He sort of got blindsided and was really taking it hard. What really helped him get over his wife was her trying to transfer everything out of his bank account the next day. It took him about ten seconds to go from some sobbing fool who I didn't think was going recover for a long time to a completely new man. ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. Like just shy of the president top.
Well that sounds interesting. Can you elaborate? I'm betting that the older soldier wasn't an E-7.... Yup, probably an O. OP, the airforce will send you home if your wife is cheating on you, or if your wife is giving birth? |
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Posted: 12/1/2012 3:17:09 PM EDT
[#50]
Quoted: Quoted: ETA: The wife cheating with a military member got escalated. To the top. FRY HIS ASS.....IF HES TWICE HIS AGE HES GOTTA BE E7ISH..........HE KNOWS BETTER This. |
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