Posted: 8/16/2014 5:23:49 PM EDT
[#3]
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Thank you very much for your input. I am expecting it to take all day, that's why I wanted it on a Friday, so that I didn't have to worry about getting back here for work the next day all burnt out and tired (about a 3 hour drive, each way). I am planning on bringing some snacks, caffeine gum, 5-hour energy drinks, and the like. I just don't know what to expect. I know she wants this to be done ASAP, I know why, and that makes me feel bitter. I hope I can restrain that bitterness and think clearly, but after not speaking to her or seeing her for so long, I'm worried about making a goofy mistake which will haunt me. I just want to limit the damage to me, so that I can move on. I guess I'm also worried about 'what happens next.' I hope all of that makes sense.
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Thank you very much for your input. I am expecting it to take all day, that's why I wanted it on a Friday, so that I didn't have to worry about getting back here for work the next day all burnt out and tired (about a 3 hour drive, each way). I am planning on bringing some snacks, caffeine gum, 5-hour energy drinks, and the like. I just don't know what to expect. I know she wants this to be done ASAP, I know why, and that makes me feel bitter. I hope I can restrain that bitterness and think clearly, but after not speaking to her or seeing her for so long, I'm worried about making a goofy mistake which will haunt me. I just want to limit the damage to me, so that I can move on. I guess I'm also worried about 'what happens next.' I hope all of that makes sense.
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Thank you very much for that link. I read everything that they had, and it was helpful. I know she wants to get this over with as fast as possible, she had already told me so. Myself, I have the patience of a saint, but I don't know how to turn that into leverage within the next week or so before mediation. Because, if that doesn't work, we then go to court. Even though I am very patient, I hate mind games. I'm a busy guy, and when I'm not busy, I'm trying to rest. I wouldn't mind putting this behind me at all. I just don't want to be taken to the cleaners in the end, that's all. I'm worried that there is some "step" or "rule of thumb" or "yardstick" if you will that I am not aware of, that I would be able to use, at least to get me into the ballpark. I guess I'm just worried that I don't know what I don't know, and that can be a very bad thing, and I really can't afford to make any mistakes with this. I hope you all understand. Thanks again for all of your help and support!
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Does anybody in Fl have experience in mediation? It sounds like forensicdoc is specifically stressed about that.
ETA-Maybe this will help you OP? http://floridamediationcenter.com
Never done mediation for a divorce, but I have for a malpractice case (don't ask).
You'll do fine. There is no grilling, there is nobody getting in your face, and nobody assassinating your character/competence/whatever (if that comes, it's later at trial). In my case, the parties were sequestered in different rooms (after an opening presentation by both sides), and the mediator bounced back-and-forth between the rooms with offers/counter-offers/etc until it was over.
It literally took all day... but other than the general hassle factor, it was fine.
ETA: mediation rules may be different for Florida
It sounds like you have the most important part down which is patience. If you're willing to wait, and she's in a hurry, it gives you an important advantage. Even with all the anger you feel towards your ex, it's always gonna be painful seeing her move on with another man. Just do your best to appear indifferent towards her and the fact that she's moving on, and the divorce in general.
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