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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:11:47 PM EDT
[#1]
Any advice?
Get as far away from that person as possible. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:12:22 PM EDT
[#2]
Quoted:
She's been using Heroin for 6 months. One time I caught her shooting up and flushed her shit, if you ever wanna see a doper go nuts have them watch while you flush their stash. I've brought her to rehab twice, she leaves after two days, I dunno what else I can do. Any advice ? Pre-pay her funeral. Seriously. 
My niece had been to rehab 9-10 times, most recently last Jan (2015). She took off after stealing stuff from me as well as $1000 out of a bank account I had control of (but not mine). I told her she'd be dead in a year. She died six months later of a methadone overdose.........  
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:13:52 PM EDT
[#3]
I have played this game with dope heads and lost hard.
Get out as fast as you can, watch your shit, don't let them come over to your house, don't trust them EVER! And get as far away from it as possible. You are no longer friends. Sorry.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:15:28 PM EDT
[#4]
Lots of "pretend she's dead" and "she's never coming back" posts...
I've only known one heroin addict (to my knowledge), and she has been clean for years and has her shit together. She's with a great guy (not me  ), and they started and have a successful business.
I don't think you need to disown her because she's using. Just don't enable her in any way. Be supportive, but draw a line in the sand. And don't be manipulated. Good luck |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:20:45 PM EDT
[#5]
Quoted:
She's been using Heroin for 6 months. One time I caught her shooting up and flushed her shit, if you ever wanna see a doper go nuts have them watch while you flush their stash. I've brought her to rehab twice, she leaves after two days, I dunno what else I can do. Any advice ? Say your goodbyes now and prepare yourself for the eventual news you know is coming. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:23:53 PM EDT
[#6]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You can't believe anything that comes out of their mouth. Nothing. They will lie, steal, and cheat anyone they can.. I work in a rehab facility -- this is pretty much what you can expect. EVERY interaction has some kind of angle. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:24:14 PM EDT
[#7]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We have had several members here go through this recently, some with tragic results. I'll tell you mine. My youngest son is a heroin addict. You can't believe anything that comes out of their mouth. Nothing. They will lie, steal, and cheat anyone they can. My nephew is a heroin addict - similar findings. Jim |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:25:46 PM EDT
[#8]
There was a show on TV just recently about the Hells Angels. One guy who seemed to be sort of high up in the organization said the Hells Angels kicks out members if they find out they're using heroin. They wont kick you out for using meth, or cocaine, or any other drug, just heroin. Think about that for a bit.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:46:06 PM EDT
[#9]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
You may consider her to be a friend but she sure as hell doesn't think you are her friend. She only has one friend. You ain't it. Break all ties with her--it's the only way. No matter the sad story--the only answer is "NO!" I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:48:21 PM EDT
[#10]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Is this your girlfriend? Fuck no. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:48:32 PM EDT
[#11]
Large life insurance policy with you as beneficiary. May as well make some lemonade. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 9:48:44 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
You may consider her to be a friend but she sure as hell doesn't think you are her friend. She only has one friend. You ain't it. Break all ties with her--it's the only way. No matter the sad story--the only answer is "NO!" I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Get back with us after she steals your or her other friends and relatives blind. I am not saying this to be a smug ass. But it will very likely be the case. Once these people go full bore that shit becomes their only want. And your shit will get it for her. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:04:45 PM EDT
[#13]
Pimp her out to your friends. Make a few bucks. Live the life of Upgraydedd. Double dose of pimpin'.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:05:30 PM EDT
[#14]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
You may consider her to be a friend but she sure as hell doesn't think you are her friend. She only has one friend. You ain't it. Break all ties with her--it's the only way. No matter the sad story--the only answer is "NO!" I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Sometimes in life you have to leave behind the friends and family that will take you down with them. Being known as a person who will cut those kinds of people loose isn't such a bad thing either. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:21:14 PM EDT
[#15]
Walk away. She doesn't want help.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:34:03 PM EDT
[#16]
Quoted:
She's been using Heroin for 6 months. One time I caught her shooting up and flushed her shit, if you ever wanna see a doper go nuts have them watch while you flush their stash. I've brought her to rehab twice, she leaves after two days, I dunno what else I can do. Any advice ? Is she hot? |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:48:52 PM EDT
[#17]
Quoted: She's been using Heroin for 6 months. One time I caught her shooting up and flushed her shit, if you ever wanna see a doper go nuts have them watch while you flush their stash. I've brought her to rehab twice, she leaves after two days, I dunno what else I can do. Any advice ? one was offering BJ's at work in one of the company bathrooms for what ever you had in your pocket. the other stole several engines/transmissions,and tools from his grandfather who was trying to help him stay clean and learn a trade,it didn't work out so well |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:57:15 PM EDT
[#18]
You tried your best and now it's on her. You need to close it off and shut that door completely and if she comes crawling back, be firm and tough with her about it don't let her back in immediately.
It's up to her. Good luck |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 10:58:23 PM EDT
[#19]
Pics?
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:01:25 PM EDT
[#20]
Viet nam vets kicked the habit, she can too if she really wanted
 |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:04:38 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Only person that can help her is her. And this is not likely. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:07:02 PM EDT
[#22]
You might consider telling her parents because they are the ones most able and motivated to help her and so the can protect themselves from her.
TL;DR If you let her go and her parents don't know, there will be no hope. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:08:39 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
You may consider her to be a friend but she sure as hell doesn't think you are her friend. She only has one friend. You ain't it. Break all ties with her--it's the only way. No matter the sad story--the only answer is "NO!" I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Then I got nothing. She's now an anchor that will drag you to the bottom. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:09:03 PM EDT
[#24]
Everyone pretty much hit the nail on the head for what you should do.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:12:19 PM EDT
[#25]
Keep her away from your belongings. Otherwise, they'll be belonging to someone else.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:15:52 PM EDT
[#26]
Stay away. They are the worst kind of addicts and will lie, cheat, and steal in pursuit of such. They will have to find out on their own, nothing you do is going to change that. Good luck and sorry to hear.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:18:18 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Viet nam vets kicked the habit, she can too if she really wanted  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY9DcIMGxMsI bet you a lot more didn't. You grow up in the 70-s and 80-s? |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:27:46 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted: Watch your back. Watch your stuff. She is no longer to be trusted, if she ever was. Sorry to say, but the old her you knew is gone forever. Ive been down this road OP. The friend you knew before is gone. She might show brief signs of being back to normal, but will snap back at the drop of a hat. She is gone and will try to drag you to hell with her. They always do. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:32:32 PM EDT
[#29]
If she's only been using for six months, there might be some hope. Not much, but some.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:33:02 PM EDT
[#30]
I tried "saving" my best friend. It cost me years of time I can't get back and tens of thousands of dollars.
You have to be selfish right now. Maybe by some miracle she shows up at your house a year from now clean and sober, but only she can decide to take that path. You can't influence her at all. My friend was hooked on opiates, benzos, and would mix in some coke as well. It got real ugly at the end. Oh, and no he didn't overdose. He got pissed one night when the doctor at the ER wouldn't give him pain meds. He went to his parent's house and started threatening them. They called the police and he barricades himself in the house. Then he walks out the back door carrying a mosin nagant. He was walking away from the officers in the back yard and they told him to put it down. He turned and raised the gun toward one of the officers. He ate 2 rounds of buckshot in his face, neck and side area. ...DRT on his parents back patio. Some other highlights... He stole some of my prescription meds He shot himself in the hand with a 9mm while cleaning it He fired off a round from an AK47 in his garage that went out into his neighborhood somewhere Cops were called when he intimidated a dentist trying to get pain meds I tried everything you could possibly imagine to help him. You need to accept that you can't do anything in this situation. Safe yourself the aggravation and say goodbye. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:40:14 PM EDT
[#31]
Say goodbye. She's already dead.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:41:18 PM EDT
[#32]
She is no longer your friend. She will use you and steal from you to support her habit. Eject now!
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:44:05 PM EDT
[#33]
I'm not sure I've ever seen 2 pages of a thread in GD where basically everyone agreed on something. That should be a clue for you OP. I know this stuff isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:47:04 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
I'm not sure I've ever seen 2 pages of a thread in GD where basically everyone agreed on something. That should be a clue for you OP. I know this stuff isn't what you wanted to hear, but it's the truth. Every bit of advice in this thread has been EARNED , LEARNED, AND PAID FOR. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:51:11 PM EDT
[#35]
The best thing you can do is help get her arrested, possibly put on paperwork or through a drug court. A long stint in jail before inpatient is much more effective than just sending them to inpatient off the street.
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:54:12 PM EDT
[#36]
Quote HistoryQuoted: I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Quote HistoryQuoted: Quoted: You may consider her to be a friend but she sure as hell doesn't think you are her friend. She only has one friend. You ain't it. Break all ties with her--it's the only way. No matter the sad story--the only answer is "NO!" I don't enable her, I also don't leave my friends or family. Also, hope you are still doing well with your challenge you have taken on. Best wishes. |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:55:57 PM EDT
[#37]
Quoted:
She's been using Heroin for 6 months. One time I caught her shooting up and flushed her shit, if you ever wanna see a doper go nuts have them watch while you flush their stash. I've brought her to rehab twice, she leaves after two days, I dunno what else I can do. Any advice ? You wanna help her? Ok. She needs to be at least 600 miles away from her connection. Get her some Kava Kava. It helps with the withdrawls. Get her some sleeping pills. She will need them I promise. CONTROL her intake of sleeping pills. Hot showers helps with the shakes. She will have them. promise. After 3 days she will enter back into normal reality. Its a 2 yr long ordeal to end the dreams that she will have. She needs to be as far as possible from her connection, and no access to a car to drive back to said connection. Have fun brother...it almost killed me. And it did kill my fiancé. 15yrs clean over here!!! |
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Posted: 1/27/2016 11:56:20 PM EDT
[#38]
Have sex with her before she dies
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:00:59 AM EDT
[#39]
watch your shit... they tend to start stealing from their friends to pay for the addiction
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:01:57 AM EDT
[#40]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Only person that can help her is her. QFT |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:02:29 AM EDT
[#41]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
We have had several members here go through this recently, some with tragic results. I'll tell you mine. My youngest son is a heroin addict. You can't believe anything that comes out of their mouth. Nothing. They will lie, steal, and cheat anyone they can. My son was in jail Christmas Eve. My ex-wife bailed him out, as a Christmas present. He has been back in twice since then. He texted me 2 DAYS AGO WITH A SCAM. I'll sell you my tax deduction for 500 bucks. If you do it tomorrow, I'LL GIVE YOU THE LOW RATE OF 400 BUCKS! ACT TODAY! He's 26. No, I didn't do it. I can give you a lot of stories. But you really only need one. I'm really only here in GD to clown around and offer nothing of value but....I feel for you bro. This is your child ! I wish things were better for you in this situation. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:02:57 AM EDT
[#42]
Stay away.
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:04:00 AM EDT
[#43]
If she won't accept help and won't try and help herself the problem will take care of its self in time.
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:04:43 AM EDT
[#44]
Quoted: Any advice ? There's nothing you can do. Regular use of dope means doom and it's related with someone's childhood (relationship with their parents mainly). Basically, she's fucked and there's no way back. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:06:10 AM EDT
[#45]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Have sex with her before she dies Hepatitis is not fun. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:08:18 AM EDT
[#46]
Theres nothing you can do. Sorry, but thats the bottom line.
Youre not going to fix her. All you can do is wait for her to want to fix herself and offer help. Even then, odds are shes going to die a junkie. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:09:15 AM EDT
[#47]
When you are new to this subject and a decent person you just can't resist trying to understand and help. Your efforts will only lead to enabling and an emotional roller coaster.
They will always say they are clean...always. Every subject, conversation, request, problem...ends with you giving money. They have changed. Their brain chemistry overrides everything you assumed they held dear. You cannot trust an addict, not for a single second. You may care and love them, but the relationship has fundamentally changed now. Only the willing enablers refuse to see that. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:09:47 AM EDT
[#48]
You can't help someone until they want to help themself. She's not there yet. Don't cut her off but don't save her. I.e. Be there if she wants to help herself get out of the hole but beyond that she's dead to you.
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:11:54 AM EDT
[#49]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This is what've been preparing for. Death. For the last 8 months. There is nothing you can do. They have to want it. You can't do shit. Nothing. Nyet. Nada. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
In the kindest way possible I can say, Pretend she's dead. I deal with addicts every day. Just cut it all off. Done. When she can say "I've been clean for 2 years." And it's the truth, you may CONSIDER letting her back in your life. This is what've been preparing for. Death. For the last 8 months. There is nothing you can do. They have to want it. You can't do shit. Nothing. Nyet. Nada. I'm sorry man. That's rough. |
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Posted: 1/28/2016 12:14:53 AM EDT
[#50]
Life Lesson #1 - You CANNOT save someone from themselves. They will either wise up or die. No other option. This includes yourself. But if you're already introspectiNG that far, you're likely to come out ahead. ;)
Just let them know they disappoint you and walk away. It'll save you years of angst and stress.. |
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