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Posted: 4/19/2007 12:57:09 PM EDT
For me it has to be the time my ex got a little too carried away on top and somehow bent my member in a way that made it "pop".
It felt like my meat missle was literally snapped in half. I laid there motionless for about 5 minutes with the most intensely focused pain I've ever felt. Luckily, it went back to normal after a few days with only a slight sting everytime I took a piss for a couple of weeks... I looked at myself in the mirror last night and it looks like I got in a fight with a pissed off bobcat... some women love to use those claws. 
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Posted: 4/19/2007 12:58:04 PM EDT
[#1]
INBF anal jokes!
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Posted: 4/19/2007 12:59:34 PM EDT
[#2]
I was banging this chick (Currently my wife) at my friends house when he snuck in and fucking whipped my ass with a wet shoestring.
Talk about a welt. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:00:01 PM EDT
[#3]
She was on top, and I went to give her ass a slap - my aim was a little low. She thought it funny.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:00:50 PM EDT
[#4]
Suprize Buttsecks! |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:01:00 PM EDT
[#5]
full body cramp
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:02:12 PM EDT
[#6]
My GF's kitten saw these two round things dangling down and whipping back and forth.
You can guess the rest! 
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:02:39 PM EDT
[#7]
The dog came in and cold nosed me and I got hit in the head by the ceiling fan blade.
 Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me bubba. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:02:49 PM EDT
[#8]
Wow... major homosexual undertones...
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:03:33 PM EDT
[#9]
The scar on my left foot is from doing on the floor of his room. Computer mats chafe, apparently.
Ummm he kneed a hole in the wall when we were switching positions once, but I think he was too drunk for it to hurt at the time. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:03:52 PM EDT
[#10]
Bangin away on the bathroom counter with some ol girl.
she's sitting, I'm standing. Got my nut meat pinched in the drawer facing. I was really goin to town so it slammed to pretty hard. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:11:21 PM EDT
[#11]
pounding away after bad chinese food....developed a wicked cramp but didn't want to stop; she was having too much fun
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:11:34 PM EDT
[#12]
One time she was straddling me and got too carried away and almost snapped my neck and suffocated me at the same time.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:14:39 PM EDT
[#13]
Drunk happy pie time on a shag carpet.
My knees and shins looked like I had been drug behind a truck for a while the next day. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:17:35 PM EDT
[#14]
palms too?  |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:19:32 PM EDT
[#15]
cramp in my left ass cheek while doing it doggy style....looked like I was riding the full 8 seconds there....
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:20:41 PM EDT
[#16]
Thats what you get when you let a guy pound you in the ass. j/k
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:21:38 PM EDT
[#17]
ab cramp
both sides sustained an umbilical hernia hittin it also that wasn't painful, but it sure put a wack on my performance |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:22:26 PM EDT
[#18]
+1  Damn dog |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:23:11 PM EDT
[#19]
ahhh you asshole!!!
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:24:56 PM EDT
[#20]
Pulled a muscle in my stomach.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:27:40 PM EDT
[#21]
Charlie horse.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:28:24 PM EDT
[#22]
And my forearms...hey wait! Since we're sharing stories, had a dog cold nose me in the ass in mid-hump once. Resulting attempt to remove said ass from said cold-nose ended up hurting both parties and scaring the dog for life. Poor puppy, now he just sits in the corner and trembles. Jumped on the bed, roaring drunk and butt ass naked. Bounced and sailed partially through the waferboard wall behind the bed. Left a man sized hole behind and a small piece of my pride/ass. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:29:12 PM EDT
[#23]
My 4 year old son walked in on me and the fiancee once. I was on top. I froze. He whispered (getting off would be a good start).
Oh, and my kitten licked my nipple. ok, it didn't hurt, but it shocked the hell out of me! |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:30:00 PM EDT
[#24]
Paying at the end.
<rimshot> Thank you...I'll be here all week. Don't forget to tip your waitress. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:30:13 PM EDT
[#25]
Turned the lights on.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:31:30 PM EDT
[#26]
EEK!!!! a "Bender"!!! |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:31:45 PM EDT
[#27]
the 90 pound girl who bit way too hard
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:32:55 PM EDT
[#28]
Painful? You mean like when they point and laugh, or cry alot?
Nothing other than that. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:33:38 PM EDT
[#29]
The MPI of this thread is heading towards negative infinity.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:35:48 PM EDT
[#30]
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:36:50 PM EDT
[#31]
You have to be careful about that. You are VERY lucky that you didn't rupture your dick when that happened. It soundslike you may even have a little bit. Some guy's dicks never fully recover from a rupture. I don't let chicks get too buckwild on top for this reason. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:39:37 PM EDT
[#32]
In college my roomate had a chick riding him. He was in a loft bed in the dorms... He thrust and rammed her face into the textured ceiling. There were chunks of flesh up there the weekend we moved out.
My one good friend got a hernia pounding his old lady. (She's ~85lbs) I have had the "bent member pop" and the charley horse in the foot, thigh, and calf (seperate occasions, I gotta get more potassium or something). I think it is more painful when she looks at you and says "you're ok right?" and keeps going. Oh, sure! It happens all the time.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:50:42 PM EDT
[#33]
I either cracked a rib or dislocated a rib playing hockey once but never had a doctor look at it.
For like 10 months afterward it hurt like an SOB whenever my wife would get on top. I didn't miss a shift in the game and I sure as hell didn't let it stop me with the wife! |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:51:43 PM EDT
[#34]
I had gone on a long road bike ride and came to to eat and nap. I was sleeping peacefully when my not then wife woke me up. We were having at a few minutes later when I got the most painful cramp in the back of my thigh. Damn thing hurt for a week and I never did um, complete the act that day.
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Posted: 4/19/2007 1:56:49 PM EDT
[#35]
Hurt so good. I'd have to say the most PAINFUL was with an exGF. She was crazy (literally, bipolar, depressed, social anxiety, the works), but especially when she was horny she had to have it ASAFP. Once walking to the car in a parking ramp after a hockey sports game (hockey IIRC) just got out she said she needed it RightF'nNow. We walked back to the car ('91 Ford Probe Hatchback, popped the hatch, jumped in the trunk (bent knees & all) somehow managed to get undressed and just went at it in the back of the latched hatchback. Crowds walking by saw the car bouncing with apparently nobody inside... One lady walking by said something like "Oh My" or "Oh My God..." while the now exGF was moaning in the trunk. Then out of pure genious we blurted out "Oh my...Oh my god that feels good." or something to that effect from within the trunk... All I remember is hearing guys laughing, one lady screaming, and they eventually left. We popped the back seats forward to get out of the hatchback's trunk, got 'dressed' a bit and drove away. In that hatchback with my knees bent back like that... Worst cramp I think I ever got in my life, but she just kept on going. |
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Posted: 4/19/2007 2:02:27 PM EDT
[#36]
It's not so bad until she gets close... then she grabs onto whatever is nearby and CLAMPS down with her nails. I had to stop her before she drew blood. It happened to my forearm, my bicep, my calf... |
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