Fart Football

An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, "Seven Points."
His wife rolls over and says, "What in the world was that?" The old man replied, "It's fart football."
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says "Touchdown, tie score."
After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, "Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7." Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, "Touchdown, tie score."
Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, "Field goal, I lead 17 to 14." Now the pressure is on the old man.
He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally poops in the bed.
The wife says, "What the hell was that?"
The old man says, "Half time, switch sides.

 An oldie but a goodie.   Used to be my favorite joke.

Hadn't heard that one!

Hell, that is just disturbing.....

LOL  

Quoted: Hell, that is just disturbing.....

You think that's disturbing? You haven't heard the one about the farting and the turkey and the giblets.

Quoted: Quoted: Hell, that is just disturbing..... You think that's disturbing? You haven't heard the one about the farting and the turkey and the giblets.

I love that one.

totally rude, gross and disgusting but difinately

A blind man enters a lesbian bar by mistake.  He finds his way to a bar
stool and orders a drink.  After sitting there for a while, he yells to
the bartender in a loud  voice, "Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb
blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls deathly quiet.

In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell
that joke, sir, I think it is just fair, given that you are blind, that
you should know five things:

One: The bartender is a blonde woman.
Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman.
Three: The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional
boxer.
Four: The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler
.
Five:   I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph.D., a black
belt  in karate, and a very bad attitude!

Now, think about it seriously, mister. Do you still want to tell that
joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and says: "Nah. ..
not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

Quoted: A blind man enters a lesbian bar by mistake.  He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink.  After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender in a loud  voice, "Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb blonde joke?" The bar immediately falls deathly quiet. In a deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is just fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things: One: The bartender is a blonde woman. Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman. Three: The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional boxer. Four: The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler . Five:   I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph.D., a black belt  in karate, and a very bad attitude! Now, think about it seriously, mister. Do you still want to tell that joke?" The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and says: "Nah. .. not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

BWAHAHAHAHA!

-LL, a blonde woman