Very interesting advice here, thank you.
Abusive parents... not physically or sexually to my knowledge, but yes... her father was an alcoholic.
Her "blind" vision on him you're all correct I think. She's going to have to figure it out for herself. Nothing I can say or do is going to change that. He's got her convinced she's a POS and is blessed that he's still with her. Best I can do is show her she's a great girl and deserves better.
Oh, and I'm a guy btw.
As far as me being part of the drama, I don't have to worry about that because she doesn't run to anyone for help. This first episode I just found out about and it happened months ago. She told me now because she felt it was time, but she feels it's her fault if it happens to her, so she doesn't go running to anyone apparently.
However, if she did come running to me it would be a tough situation to deal with. #1 I wouldn't want to be in that situation period. #2 She's an old friend so I can't say screw you & good luck.
Not 100% sure I could take the guy hand to hand, but I hope it wouldn't come to that. Best I could do is tell her to call the cops, come to my house, and if he comes lookin' for her I tell him I'm not letting him in.
Defending myself and my home... not a problem, I carry around my house most of the time (as well as other places) and I'm a very calm person. I don't escalate situations. Avoid them if I can and is what I'll try to do here to the best of my ability.
Thanks for the advice guys, anymore keep it comin'. I'll offer her what advice I can while he lives in another city and she's not seeing him, and when he moves back I'll distance myself from the drama.
"Don't want no drama... no no no no drama." - BEP I hate that song.