Am I a Jerk? - AR15.COM

Site Notices

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:38:25 PM EDT

About 2 ½ months ago a member of the IT department asked me to join their “weight loss contest”. Knowing how cliquish most IT departments are, I considered it an honor and agreed. Each person kicked in $50 and the winner of each category (% of total weight lost and % of body fat lost would split the purse). One person could win both categories.

Loe and behold the pot ended up being $750 and almost everyone else has put on weight, or lost very little. So, basically, it is just down to me and one other guy.

Well, apparently, he was on a Personal Improvement Plan, and didn’t show any improvement. He was offered a demotion to the help desk, but rather than take it, he resigned.

So, the people who started the contest asked every one if it was cool if we refund him his $50 entrance fee... It was fine with me.

So...That puts me in first place by a wide margin.

At the last weigh-in, I asked if I was still in the lead. The guy who organized this event replied, “Well, we (the IT folks) talked about it and we decided to allow M (the guy who resigned) to compete.”

I very politely said, “I thought it was for employees only?”

His reply: “Yeah, but he doesn’t have a job, so we decided to allow him to compete.”

Here is my beef with this:

First, it is only for employees and M is no longer an employee.

Second, the people who voted in this thing had no chance of winning. As a matter of fact some of them actually gained weight! So, no-one who voted stood to lose any $$$ either way.

Third, they never asked me and I am the one who stands to miss out on $750, or $350 at the minimum.

The guy that left really is a nice guy. He has always gone “above and beyond” for me. I really don’t mind losing the $$$ to him (as a matter of fact, I was considering giving it to him anyway). The problem I have is that a group of people decided what to do with what is practically my $$$. It’s like welfare…and that bothers me.

Am I a jerk?

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:40:30 PM EDT

[#1]

If you do not feel comfortable with changes in the rules, you should ask for your $50 back.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:41:10 PM EDT

[#2]

Quoted:
About 2 ½ months ago a member of the IT department asked me to join their “weight loss contest”. Knowing how cliquish most IT departments are, I considered it an honor and agreed. Each person kicked in $50 and the winner of each category (% of total weight lost and % of body fat lost would split the purse. One person could win both categories.

Lowe and behold the pot ended up being $750 and almost everyone else has put on weight, or lost very little. So, basically, it is just down to me and one other guy.

Well, apparently, he was on a Personal Improvement Plan, and didn’t show any improvement. He was offered a demotion to the help desk, but rather than take it, he resigned.

So, the people who started the contest asked every one if it was cool if we refund him his $50 entrance fee... It was fine with me.

So...That puts me in first place by w wide margin.

At the last weigh-in, I asked if I was still in the lead. The guy who organized this event replied, “Well, we (the IT folks) talked about it and we decided to allow M (the guy who resigned) to compete.”

I very politely said, “I thought it was for employees only?”

His reply: “Yeah, but he doesn’t have a job, so we decided to allow him to compete.”

Here is my beef with this:

First, it is only for employees and M is no longer an employee.

Second, the people who voted in this thing had no chance of winning. As a matter of fact some of them actually gained weight! So, no-one who voted stood to lose any $$$ either way.

Third, they never asked me and I am the one who stands to miss out on $750, or $350 at the minimum.

The guy that left really is a nice guy. He has always gone “above and beyond” for me. I really don’t mind losing the $$$ to him (as a matter of fact, I was considering giving it to him anyway). The problem I have is that a group of people decided what to do with what is practically my $$$. It’s like welfare…and that bothers me.

Am I a jerk?

Poll inbound.

No.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:41:55 PM EDT

[#3]

No, your co-workers refunded his share, he has no stake in the contest. He's out of the company by his own volition, it wasn't a matter of hard luck.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:43:27 PM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:
No, your co-workers refunded his share, he has no stake in the contest. He's out of the company by his own volition, it wasn't a matter of hard luck.

Actually, they never followed through with the refund. They just let him stay in the game.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:43:53 PM EDT

[#5]

Not at all.

The rules shouldn't be changed in the bottom of the 9th. Stick to your guns.

HH

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:45:03 PM EDT

[#6]

Employee's only....your not a jerk.

Plus his money was already refunded....claim yer prize!! Good job!!

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:45:57 PM EDT

[#7]

Quoted:
Not at all.

The rules shouldn't be changed in the bottom of the 9th. Stick to your guns.

HH

What he said

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:45:58 PM EDT

[#8]

No.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:46:25 PM EDT

[#9]

Easy solution.

Don't eat this week.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:49:22 PM EDT

[#10]

Suckfest all the way around. I guess figure it's charity/severance and don't participate in the next one.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:49:55 PM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:
Easy solution.

Don't eat this week.

Nice try. I have lost over 20#'s since the contest started and over 40#'s before that. I have lost all of the easy ones...

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:52:43 PM EDT

[#12]

I'm in IT. Just before I started my current contract there was another guy who worked there and left. A couple of years ago on his birthday they took him out for lunch, and since it was his birthdaythe restraunt gave him a free desert. They had this unwritten and highly nasty rule that on birthdays each person took a bite of the desert and passed it on to the rest of the table. Well, this guy decided to eat the whole desert himself. I have heard this story at least 3 times from EACH of the people in my IT department.

You don't want to be that guy.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:52:48 PM EDT

[#13]

Consider two things:

First, your conscience - It doesn't sound like a huge moral issue one way or the other.

Second, how is this going to affect your working relationship with your peers/colleagues? You said it yourself-the IT dept. can be very cliquish... you be the judge.

Is it worth winning 750 bucks at the cost of alienating your co workers? It's not a matter of principle in this case to my understanding.

Did the contest end or is it still ongoing?

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:53:30 PM EDT

[#14]

Grasshopper, your weight loss is your reward.

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:56:49 PM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
I'm in IT. Just before I started my current contract there was another guy who worked there and left. A couple of years ago on his birthday they took him out for lunch, and since it was his birthdaythe restraunt gave him a free desert. They had this unwritten and highly nasty rule that on birthdays each person took a bite of the desert and passed it on to the rest of the table. Well, this guy decided to eat the whole desert himself. I have heard this story at least 3 times from EACH of the people in my IT department.

You don't want to be that guy.

I think you are right. I have to work closely with the IT department daily...

But, I gotta tell you it really rankels that a bunch of people voted what to do with my $$$ without asking me.

On the other hand, I have worked places where I was on the bad side of the IT department...and I would have paid $750 easy, just to make it go away...

Posted: 9/6/2005 7:58:59 PM EDT

[#16]

This thread just reminded me why I got out of the office environment 7 years ago.Doing stupid things so you can fit in with a group of people that have absolutely no social skills with hopes of getting invited to go out to lunch so you can talk shit about the people that aren't in "The Group".All this while scarfing down huge amounts of food in 30 minutes.

Just play the game,you really have no choice unless you like to be shunned.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:02:06 PM EDT

[#17]

Quoted:
Grasshopper, your weight loss is your reward.

Yup.....

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:08:17 PM EDT

[#18]

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:11:21 PM EDT

[#19]

I'd pitch a stink. Nice guy or not, rules should not be changed in the middle of a game. If they want to change the rules, demand your ducats back.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:15:46 PM EDT

[#20]

Definatly a jerk

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:16:30 PM EDT

[#21]

Quoted:
If you do not feel comfortable with changes in the rules, you should ask for your $50 back.

+1

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:17:37 PM EDT

[#22]

Yes.

But given your coworkers already think that...

Go for all the money. At least you be a consistent jerk who will be ever so slightly richer.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:18:29 PM EDT

[#23]

not in your interest to complan, just own them take all the money and buy a firearm with it......

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:19:57 PM EDT

[#24]

Quoted:
Definatly a jerk

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:21:09 PM EDT

[#25]

I'd let it slide. As long as they don't screw with $350 of your money, you still gain financially and you aren't the guy who becomes the asshole everyone hates for no good reason. If it were principle, I'd make a stink, but practically, pissing off everyone you work with for an extended period of time isn't worth $350 of gravy.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:22:58 PM EDT

[#26]

Quoted:
I'd let it slide. As long as they don't screw with $350 of your money, you still gain financially and you aren't the guy who becomes the asshole everyone hates for no good reason. If it were principle, I'd make a stink, but practically, pissing off everyone you work with for an extended period of time isn't worth $350 of gravy.

Actually, I'll get nothing. He is winning in both categories.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:26:57 PM EDT

[#27]

It was an IT contest. You are an outsider. Shut your pie hole. (that, BTW, is good advice on how to both win and keep the IT people on your side). They obviously like this guy, probably more than you. If you win, give some of the $$ to him. You will be the hero and plus, you will likely live longer since you're not such a fat @ss anymore.

Win-win.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:26:58 PM EDT

[#28]

Since he practically got fired, he'll get depressed and go on a burger eating binge. Lean it out while he packs on the pounds.

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:30:13 PM EDT

[#29]

Quoted:
No, your co-workers refunded his share, he has no stake in the contest. He's out of the company by his own volition, it wasn't a matter of hard luck.

+1 He's out you're in

Posted: 9/6/2005 8:37:18 PM EDT

[#30]

How is this guy winning now? More time to work out because he is unemployed?

Posted: 9/6/2005 10:09:56 PM EDT

[#31]

Apparently, he has no $$$ for food so he is "refugee-ing" it, as the IT department says...

Posted: 9/8/2005 7:57:43 PM EDT

[#32]

Bump...

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:29:40 PM EDT

[#33]

My favorite game to play is..

I WIN

Otherwise, I don't wanna play.

Being you are next in line, in the running, you sould have been the FIRST person that was the MOST involved in the decision to keep him in. They double crossed you by making the decision without you, because they knew you were likely to oppose. Going forward watch your six with these people.

I'll bet the rules did not have a disclaimer, that the cards would be stacked in favor of the nice guy who NEEDS the money. Consistency and integrity people...follow the original plan.

On the otherhand, there's the morality issue. Sure it makes sense to want to help out a nice guy, who could really use the help. If that's what they want to do fine, game over. EVERYONE gets a refund. Those that want to hand it over to the nice guy can do so. It's easy to want to donate money that they've already lost. Will they still be as eager to give him the cash once they get it back? You can still maintain a "gentleman's bet", just to see who actually wins.

Slash
IIRC you have a very cute Mrs.
A trip to the store for some wine, candles and soft music may be in order. You and the Mrs. may have to put in some "overtime" to get the win.

You'll come out on top in the end. (figuratively...or not)

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:33:01 PM EDT

[#34]

You are right, but should just let it go.

Its a no win situation.

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:36:16 PM EDT

[#35]

It's a no-win situation, like the lady said.

This from someone who routinely has all the IT people against him. They don't like me because I am not their type, I don't sit my ass in front of a computer and I go out and do things which they dream of, like living for real and not on the internut.

Either way, whether you win or lose, you are the outsider who A) won after raising a stink or B) was a bad loser.

Move on, and screw them every chance you get.

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:42:48 PM EDT

[#36]

You are not a jerk. I hate office politics. Good luck with whatever you decide. Oh, your coworkers are assholes--the lot of them.

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:45:42 PM EDT

[#37]

.

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:46:30 PM EDT

[#38]

He quit. Not your problem just because they feel sorry for him. Tell them to give you your money and they can all donate their own money to the guy.

Don't settle for less than half if it comes down to you not getting all.

Posted: 9/8/2005 9:54:22 PM EDT

[#39]

Telling you he was out of the contest and his money was going to be refunded introduced state of ease for you.
You, being well in the lead, assuredly relaxed your grip on the lead to some extent, thereby putting your chances of winning in jeopordy.

If they told you he was out - HE IS OUT. Bringing him back into the contest is total bullshit.
I have a feeling they want you to throw a fit and ask for your money back. This would allow all of them to recoup their money. I know it's only $50, but it's another thing to see some guy you have to look at every day walk away fit trim and $750 dollars richer.

I would tell every one of them exactly what you think about this - then make DAMN SURE YOU WIN BOTH CATAGORIES.
I would tell them if they didn't know how to correctly run a contest, they shouldn't have started one to begin with.

It's amazing how people can F up the simplest things...

Posted: 9/9/2005 5:58:58 AM EDT

[#40]

HEy man,

at least losing the 20 # is better of a reweard.

I mean that gives you more time with your loved ones !

Silver lining and all that!

Posted: 9/9/2005 6:06:20 AM EDT

[#41]

No, what's fair is fair. You don't change the rules that far into it. Just not right.

Posted: 9/9/2005 7:16:39 AM EDT

[#42]

Quoted:
I'm in IT. Just before I started my current contract there was another guy who worked there and left. A couple of years ago on his birthday they took him out for lunch, and since it was his birthdaythe restraunt gave him a free desert. They had this unwritten and highly nasty rule that on birthdays each person took a bite of the desert and passed it on to the rest of the table. Well, this guy decided to eat the whole desert himself. I have heard this story at least 3 times from EACH of the people in my IT department.

You don't want to be that guy.

I would hope everyone was using new utensils!

If not that is sick!

BigDozer66

Posted: 9/9/2005 4:42:49 PM EDT

[#43]

Quoted:
No, what's fair is fair. You don't change the rules that far into it. Just not right.

Well, I talked to them about it today since our final "weigh in" is on Monday. They had a new story all prepared: They now maintain that the contest was never limited to my company.

Whatever. By, $750.00!