A friend of mine has a saying " the best thing for a drunk is a could park bench." I went through the same thing with my mom a long time ago, except I was there in all the mess at the time. She married the wrong guy, got hooked on crack and took me, her 10 year old son at the time, on the ride with her. I eventually got away and lived with my Dad. After a few years Mom straightened out, evetually became an addictions counciler herself and is now remarried to a great guy, retired and my closest relative. The best thing you can do for now is let her go, stop taking her calls and let her find that cold park bench. It's up to her weather she wants to get off of it then and get some help. If she does then maybee some day you can have a relationship with her, if not then you wont be drug into the misserey of her world, emotionally. I realize that you said you are not religious and thats cool, but you don't have to be to pray to what ever god you may concieve, and that does help for most that try it dealing with the stress and baggage that come with having such collorfull faimly members. Just my .02 YMMV.