Well I ended up getting a Highlander hybrid instead.
Drove 4 or 5 different RAV4's from a new 2024 to a 2017 with 45,000 miles. The new RAV4 drove OK but was definitely gutless in terms of acceleration to merge or pass. The used ones (even a 2022 with less than 40,000 miles) seemed pretty rattly with a lot of odd noises.
A friend had suggested a Highlander and the dealer mentioned they had a 2017 hybrid with 56,000 miles on it. I test drove that and it was world's better in ride quality and noise elimination (not really a shock) compared to the RAVs. I could have lived with the smaller vehicle but the ride quality and noise was a deal breaker on the RAV.
Thanks for all the input!