When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victim during a holdup in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder: He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again.  This time it worked.


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The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat cutting machine and, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurance company.  The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men to have a look for himself.  He tried the machine out and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.

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 After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Beltway had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3
days. Damn I like that one...


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An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday recovering from serious head wounds received from an oncoming train.  When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.


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A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughters swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy.  The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon.  The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window!  Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma'am.  It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise men came. And I was hoping that they would show up again."

[b]A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her an examination to determine the cause of her daughters swollen abdomen. It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say "Your daughter is pregnant." The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor that her daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation by having sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched the horizon. The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out the window! Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I am paying attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a star appeared in the East, and three wise men came. And I was hoping that they would show up again."[/b]

LMAO

Shit, those are funny!!!!!

Had a real good morning laugh! Gotta wonder about people sometimes.

Don't know about the first ones but the pregnant daughter shtik is a joke I first heard about 40 years ago. [:D]

[url]http://www.darwinawards.com[/url]

There's no end to the stupidity of some people.

Anyone who clicks that link, read the Short arm of the law and Scrambled eggs stories, LoL!