I have a permanent reflex that sends my right elbow skyward whenever somebody comes up on my right side- anybody else have funny stories to share?  I view the ignition key trick and the sidestand trick as advanced versions of group ride humor.

what?


What do you mean it takes 12 pancakes to shingle a dog house?


Don't these people know that footballs don't have feathers?

they're all BEST when self-inflicted

wut up, Kirk?

Quoted: they're all BEST when self-inflicted wut up, Kirk?

DUDE!

It truly is a small world.  How the heck are you?

Man, you have a special place in my heart for sharing your home with my umbrella wife and I.

My retirement plans still involve retiring on a sailboat in your neighborhood.

Quoted: Quoted: they're all BEST when self-inflicted wut up, Kirk? DUDE! It truly is a small world.  How the heck are you? Man, you have a special place in my heart for sharing your home with my umbrella wife and I. My retirement plans still involve retiring on a sailboat in your neighborhood.

I'm still hangin' in there!  Same ol' job...

Still hangin' around the old labs playground, but also spending a bunch of time here...

Finally found Mrs. Right, got married on April Fools Day this year

Still gots the busa...  sold my '04 1k last summer...  there's also a KTM 950 Adv. in the garage that's about to go to a new home...  I just haven't been riding lately...  too much going on between work, home, family, and gunplay

How's things over there?

I pm'd you, but I'm sure that maui has kept you up to date on stuff with me.

I'm very happy for you.  Marriage has been very good to me, and you strike me as the kind of man of integrity.  I would really look forward to meeting your wife in person.   I can't wait to tell my wife.

I don't know what to tell you about myself- I have the best job in the world, the best wife in the world, I live in paradise, and I ride 365 days a year.  I plan to retire at 59, to a sailboat in the tropics, with a wife young enough to be my daughter.  

Wow it's good to hear from you.  

I thought about you the other night.

I went fishing, and you know that I'm not much of a fisherman.

I have an inexpensive 15' carbon-fiber Daiwa surf rod with a huge Daiwa spinning reel, loaded with 40 pound monofilament.  I went slide-baiting for Ulua with a bunch of my co-workers.  I got skunked, but it really is true that the worst day fishing is still better than the best day at work.

Quoted: I pm'd you, but I'm sure that maui has kept you up to date on stuff with me. I'm very happy for you.  Marriage has been very good to me, and you strike me as the kind of man of integrity.  I would really look forward to meeting your wife in person.   I can't wait to tell my wife. I don't know what to tell you about myself- I have the best job in the world, the best wife in the world, I live in paradise, and I ride 365 days a year.  I plan to retire at 59, to a sailboat in the tropics, with a wife young enough to be my daughter.   Wow it's good to hear from you.

yep, I remember when y'all took off...  Maui gave a brief report shortly after but kept it very high level and vague.  

Man, I try try try to be that "man of integrity", but no one is perfect and I certainly do have some slips, trips, and falls on occasion...  One of these days I'll get it right.

The Mrs. is a sweetheart and is waaaay too good to me.  Well, she's stuck with me now!

Tell Mrs. P we said hello!

Maybe we'll show up in your neighborhood one of these days.  It'd be good to see y'all again.

Good catchin' up with ya'!

You can stay at my place anytime, with no notice required.  I have an R1 with an Ohlins shock, custom built to Graves Motorsports specifications by the Ohlins race shop (not the regular production line), and a fresh set of Dunlop DOT-approved race tires.  It's yours for as long as you want to stay.

Quoted: I thought about you the other night. I went fishing, and you know that I'm not much of a fisherman. I have an inexpensive 15' carbon-fiber Daiwa surf rod with a huge Daiwa spinning reel, loaded with 40 pound monofilament.  I went slide-baiting for Ulua with a bunch of my co-workers.  I got skunked, but it really is true that the worst day fishing is still better than the best day at work.

Sadly, not only have I not been riding much the past few years, I've also been victim to a severe self-imposed fishing deficit

Gotta get a few things handled around the house and then I'll be back out on the water.  

That last sentence of yours says it all

I give God all the Glory.  

Quoted: what? What do you mean it takes 12 pancakes to shingle a dog house? Don't these people know that footballs don't have feathers?

Lay off the peyote, dude.

The kill-switch trick:

Ride up on the right side of one of your buddies while you're going down the road, and slap his kill switch while in motion.

The defense for it, is to smack his hand away by raising your right elbow.

The ignition key trick:

At a traffic light, stop on the left side of one of your buddies.  When the cross-street light goes yellow, point to his right, to distract him.  Then reach over and snatch his ignition key and drop it on the ground before taking off.  If it's somebody you don't like, take the key and drop it a block down the road.

The sidestand trick:

(WARNING- WHAT HAPPENS MAY NOT ACTUALLY BE FUNNY)

As you come up to a red light, put your sidestand down and get the bike in neutral.  Stop on the left side of one of your buddies.  Reach over and give him a shove on his left shoulder.  When he shoves you back, pretend to lose your balance, falling to the left, off your bike.  When he sees you coming off your bike and your bike going over, he'll just about drop his own bike to try to catch yours, not seeing that your sidestand is going to catch your bike.  It's only funny if he doesn't drop his own bike in the process.

I had a friend throw my key, just my little black key no keychain of anykind, onto the sidewalk when he distracted me.. but when he tossed it bounced into some landscape gravel.  Had to roll off to the side like a dumbass and dig around for 10 minutes to find it.  Friend was no help cause he couldnt stop laughing.

Also have ran over two big jack rabbits at different times.  one at about 40 and another at 80.  That one was a little scary for a second.  

My neighbor is 73 and rode his people(china 50 cc scooter)to a park to see a concert,and I see a wecker truck flatbed bring his scooter back!

After they unload it he pushes it to the driveway,I look at it and ask him what is wrong with it?

He says it will turn over but not start,I look and the killswitch is on!

I ask him if he knew it had one and did he ever use it?

He says no,and you know the rest of the story!

Bob

Quoted: The kill-switch trick: Ride up on the right side of one of your buddies while you're going down the road, and slap his kill switch while in motion. The defense for it, is to smack his hand away by raising your right elbow. The ignition key trick: At a traffic light, stop on the left side of one of your buddies.  When the cross-street light goes yellow, point to his right, to distract him.  Then reach over and snatch his ignition key and drop it on the ground before taking off.  If it's somebody you don't like, take the key and drop it a block down the road. The sidestand trick: (WARNING- WHAT HAPPENS MAY NOT ACTUALLY BE FUNNY) As you come up to a red light, put your sidestand down and get the bike in neutral.  Stop on the left side of one of your buddies.  Reach over and give him a shove on his left shoulder.  When he shoves you back, pretend to lose your balance, falling to the left, off your bike.  When he sees you coming off your bike and your bike going over, he'll just about drop his own bike to try to catch yours, not seeing that your sidestand is going to catch your bike.  It's only funny if he doesn't drop his own bike in the process.

I foresee my roommate being pissed at me soon.

The battery switch for the military John Deere 10K forklifts is outside the cab, on the side of the engine compartment.

The secret is to wait until the guy lines up for a load, and then flip it and walk away. Because its diesel the engine still runs, but none of the controls work.


Classic.

Wow, if someone did any of those to me I think a cock punch would be the punishment.

Quoted: Wow, if someone did any of those to me I think a cock punch would be the punishment.

It would take a bit for you to catch up though!

Quoted: Wow, if someone did any of those to me I think a cock punch would be the punishment.

It's no big deal. The engine is still turning (being driven by the wheel), but when you twist the throttle nothing happens.

Try it out sometime, just flip the switch off, wait a couple seconds, then flip it back on. You don't have to use the starter, pull the clutch, or anything like that.

it will backfire if you hold the kill switch then let it go.  good way to mess with pedestrians or cars, but you may blow your carb boot off.