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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:37:19 PM EDT
There's a large snek hiding in my garage and I want it out before I have to burn my house down.
90% chance it's a western diamondback, so I can't just go willy nilly poking all my stuff with a stick til he pops out. I put down a snek trap with a big sticky pad inside but he hasn't been caught. I could just leave the doors open, but I wouldn't know he left, and more wild things will likely take up residence. Ideas?? rulez:  Attached File |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:38:27 PM EDT
[#1]
Quoted:
There's a large snek hiding in my garage and I want it out before I have to burn my house down. 90% chance it's a western diamondback, so I can't just go willy nilly poking all my stuff with a stick til he pops out. I put down a snek trap with a big sticky pad inside but he hasn't been caught. I could just leave the doors open, but I wouldn't know he left, and more wild things will likely take up residence. Ideas?? step on snek? |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:38:44 PM EDT
[#2]
Get a mongoose.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:39:46 PM EDT
[#3]
No step on snek, he bite
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:41:13 PM EDT
[#4]
Call animal control.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:41:15 PM EDT
[#5]
Get a feeder mouse. Perch up on something and wait.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:41:39 PM EDT
[#6]
clean the shit out of your garage and take away his hiding place?
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:43:01 PM EDT
[#7]
Buy a feeder mouse at the pet store for $1.50 and put it live on the sticky pad, game over.
Or you could just snek up on it. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:43:10 PM EDT
[#8]
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:43:47 PM EDT
[#9]
Well, if he IS a rattler, you should *probably* hear him before he bites.... So there is that.
I would set my house on fucking fire. Seriously. Fuck that. 
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:44:22 PM EDT
[#10]
Offer him a dinner over candle light, soft music, maybe some red wine?
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:45:07 PM EDT
[#11]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Well, if he IS a rattler, you should *probably* hear him before he bites.... So there is that. I would set my house on fucking fire. Seriously. Fuck that. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:46:15 PM EDT
[#12]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Buy a feeder mouse at the pet store for $1.50 and put it live on the sticky pad, game over. Or you could just snek up on it. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:47:51 PM EDT
[#13]
Just ask yourself, What would Taylor Swift do?, and just do that.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:48:31 PM EDT
[#14]
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:48:39 PM EDT
[#15]
Post pics of the inside of the garage and we'll play "Where's
How much stuff you have that you can't find it?? |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:50:01 PM EDT
[#16]
Go to the fuel station and get some high octane. Start filling car inside garage while smoking a cigarette and talking on the phone. Drop phone and spill fuel while smoke falls out of your mouth and run
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:51:09 PM EDT
[#17]
Serious question....How bout a water hose???
How water-resistant is your gay-raj? 
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:51:14 PM EDT
[#18]
Chances are its a gopher snake and harmless. I live north of Phoenix and about 80% of the sneks that I get in my yard or garage are this. 15% are western diamond backs and 10% are mambas.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:51:24 PM EDT
[#19]
Put down a horsehair rope in the area he is. That'll trap him there.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:51:33 PM EDT
[#20]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:51:49 PM EDT
[#21]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Get a feeder mouse. Perch up on something and wait. Oh, and also be sure to record it. 
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:52:18 PM EDT
[#22]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Chances are its a gopher snake and harmless. I live north of Phoenix and about 80% of the sneks that I get in my yard or garage are this. 15% are western diamond backs and 10% are mambas. 
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:52:25 PM EDT
[#23]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Get a mongoose. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:53:35 PM EDT
[#24]
Go find some antifa. They live to step on snek. Just make sure snek bite them first.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:54:18 PM EDT
[#25]
Mongoose.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:54:35 PM EDT
[#26]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Get a mongoose. Video it too.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:54:50 PM EDT
[#27]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
This. Hunt over bait. Shotgun full of bird shot won't damage your garage floor much. Oh, and also be sure to record it. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:54:56 PM EDT
[#28]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Offer him a dinner over candle light, soft music, maybe some red wine? |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:56:34 PM EDT
[#29]
Go out into the wild, catch identical snakes. Milk them for their venom. Inject into horses. Harvest anti-venom. Give yourself increasingly larger doses until you can survive a bite from one. Then go back to your house and burn it down.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:58:05 PM EDT
[#30]
THE MONGEESE ARE INEFFECTIVE ON RATTLE SNEKS
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:58:45 PM EDT
[#31]
Snek from the other day. He's no longer with us. RIP snek.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:59:33 PM EDT
[#32]
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Posted: 8/15/2017 5:59:56 PM EDT
[#33]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
THE MONGEESE ARE INEFFECTIVE ON RATTLE SNEKS |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:00:47 PM EDT
[#34]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Why come you gotta microaggression all over the poor mongeese? Mongeese has feelz 2. Quote HistoryQuoted:
Quoted:
THE MONGEESE ARE INEFFECTIVE ON RATTLE SNEKS
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:03:22 PM EDT
[#35]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Chances are its a gopher snake and harmless. I live north of Phoenix and about 80% of the sneks that I get in my yard or garage are this. 15% are western diamond backs and 10% are mambas. 
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:04:45 PM EDT
[#36]
CWO is right. Beer go with snek. Everybody know that.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:04:46 PM EDT
[#37]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Chances are its a gopher snake and harmless. I live north of Phoenix and about 80% of the sneks that I get in my yard or garage are this. 15% are western diamond backs and 10% are mambas. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:05:51 PM EDT
[#38]
Kilo Romeo Uniform Sierra Tango 1, send me your grid, have fast movers inbound loaded with Snake & Nape, Danger Close, over
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:08:33 PM EDT
[#39]
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:09:36 PM EDT
[#40]
open garage door, start lawnmower and let it run in garage, watch snek haul ass out.
No stepping involved. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:11:57 PM EDT
[#41]
Tannerite?
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:12:51 PM EDT
[#42]
Roomba.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:13:01 PM EDT
[#43]
Poison mouse?
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:15:06 PM EDT
[#44]
Start car, and seal up the garage. Make sure you don't stay in the garage too.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:15:42 PM EDT
[#45]
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:16:24 PM EDT
[#46]
Call the AZ Herp Society...they might send someone out to catch it for you.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:16:36 PM EDT
[#47]
Strip neked, cover self in powdered sugar. Sneks hate the sugar.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:16:42 PM EDT
[#48]
Call your mother-in-law and let her go in and fetch the snake.
Snakes don't bite mothers-in-law due to professional courtesy. Itsafact. |
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:18:44 PM EDT
[#49]
Get fishing pole, put mouse on hook, catch snek, pee on snek to assert dominance.
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Posted: 8/15/2017 6:20:10 PM EDT
[#50]
Quote HistoryQuoted:
Get fishing pole, put mouse on hook, catch snek, pee on snek to assert dominance. |
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