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Posted: 9/1/2015 6:08:53 AM EDT
Apparently Satan isn't finished with his fun. I have already been visited earlier this year by his creation of pure hell; Kidney Stones..... Nature's Scary & Pure Evil Little Gift Of Hate. I have another one of his unborn hell spawn trying to destroy one of the few and only thing I care about.... a GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP! I awoke with the wonderful feeling of burning hatred pain... the same type of pain that #blacklivesmatter for me and the sudden urge to go as if God was going to unleash the next great 40 day flood from my privates. Go I did and what happened wasn't the massive torrent of relief but instead the feeling of fire and brimstone along with a blood so red, it was black.... as black as the darkest pits of hell where the Devil comes up with such horrid thoughts. So right now I am in Hospital once more and loving the Dilaudid.














And this post cannot be complete without a rant of course.










YOU FUCKING COCK SUCKING SHIT EATING PIECE OF FAILURE. I PRAY TO THE GREAT ALLAH THAT HE WILL DELCARE A HOLY JIHAD AGAINST YOU AND CAST YOU INTO THE NEITHER REGIONS OF HELL WHERE YOU WILL FOREVER LICK THE TAINT OF NANCY PELOSI WHILE HAVING HITLER DIDDLE YOUR ASS WITH HIS COCK. I FUCKING HOPE THE WITCH DOCTORS OF THE DARK CONTINENT WILL RIP OUT YOUR EYES, BOIL THEM, AND INJECT THEM INTO YOUR TESTICLES, AFTER WHICH THEY DISMEMBER YOU ALIVE AND SELL YOU TO THE CHINESE AS FOLKLORE MEDICINE FOR GENITAL WARTS. KIDNEY STONE; YOUR EXISTENCE IS THAT OF PURE FUCKING SHIT COVERED HELL. I FUCKING HATE YOU. I WILL FUCKING DESTROY YOU. I WILL MAKE IT MY LIFE'S MISSION TO ERADICATE YOU FROM THE SURFACE OF THE EARTH... NO... THE UNIVERSE ITSELF. THE PURSUIT OF WEALTH, WOMEN, POWER, ETERNAL LIFE, AND EVEN THE CURE FOR AID COVERED SHIT STAINED CANCER WILL BE NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT I WILL DO YOU DESTROY YOU.










FUCKING FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKTARTED FUCKED FUCKING FUCK!




 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:12:12 AM EDT
GOL DAYUM!!!!!  7659990/10!!
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:15:05 AM EDT
You, sir, know how to rant!!!!! OUTSTANDING!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:16:17 AM EDT
I also suffer from the stones of pain and fury.

I judge this rant an Infinity/10.

Well done.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:16:33 AM EDT
Bravo!  Who is #2's boss?    YOU are
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:17:13 AM EDT
I gots the gout stones.

I feels your pain.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:17:14 AM EDT
Rosemary?
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:19:02 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Rosemary?
View Quote
I fucking wish!

 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:19:27 AM EDT
See a urologist. Get Rx for Norco, Flomax, and Zofran. When the Debil rears its ugly head fight it back with the chemical weapons.

Ask me how I know.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:19:30 AM EDT
Pebble in your mattress?

Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:20:37 AM EDT


FWIW, I've had a kidney stone before.  WORST. FUCKING. THING. EVER.  Almost passed out driving myself to the hospital and had to pull over a couple of times to puke.  I never though I could be in so much pain that it would cause me to vomit.  Sad part is, it wasn't even that large.  I pray I never have another one.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 6:22:25 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


See a urologist. Get Rx for Norco, Flomax, and Zofran. When the Debil rears its ugly head fight it back with the chemical weapons.



Ask me how I know.
View Quote
I already have my good sir. Sadly this is not my first fight.

 



The worst thing is.... you feel like you're dying and then when you find out you aren't. You get pissed because death would mean the pain ends.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:11:02 AM EDT
I'm getting the feeling that OP might be just a little angry. Great rant.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:15:39 AM EDT
Oh, man, that sucks. But, as with many great artists, the suffering you endure has unlocked your creative spirit and you have produced the Sistene Chapel of rants.

Kudos, Sir!

In your honor, I shall drink a few Diet Cokes, take some Calcium pills and sit in my recliner, immobile, for 12 hours.  


TC
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:19:05 AM EDT
I assumed this thread was about you starting to carry a Hi-Point as a primary weapon amd ditching your S&Ws.

Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:22:40 AM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
I already have my good sir. Sadly this is not my first fight.  

The worst thing is.... you feel like you're dying and then when you find out you aren't. You get pissed because death would mean the pain ends.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
See a urologist. Get Rx for Norco, Flomax, and Zofran. When the Debil rears its ugly head fight it back with the chemical weapons.

Ask me how I know.
I already have my good sir. Sadly this is not my first fight.  

The worst thing is.... you feel like you're dying and then when you find out you aren't. You get pissed because death would mean the pain ends.


My second bout was not cool. After the doc had given me some peashooter pain med he came back to find the monitor showing my BP over 200. He shot me with Dilaudid and that ended that. I was better until the nausea from the Dilaudid hit.

Fuck kidney stones.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:23:40 AM EDT




I was shooting out a stone a month for a short period of time until my dick doctor figured out what was making them.  
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:25:03 AM EDT
I hope this becomes the latest copy pasta.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:26:58 AM EDT
Do you fell better?
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:30:31 AM EDT
Last time I had kidney stones was in the service in LA. After lying in the hospital bed for several hours getting IV's, I walked out, walked the couple miles back to the barracks and went to sleep in my own bunk. Walking must have helped as I must have passed it right after I woke up. Keep myself over hydrated now and have never had another one in almost 30 years.

Still remember how painful it was, my sympathies OP.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:37:11 AM EDT
Well done OP
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:41:00 AM EDT
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:43:42 AM EDT
5/10 not enough fucks in the body of the rant You just can't add fucks at the end, it must be a fuck laden rant.

ETA and drink more water.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:44:02 AM EDT
Well done!!
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:50:38 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Do you fell better?
View Quote
No, but the drugs make me think I feel better. Because I know when this shit wears off the pain will return.

 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:51:44 AM EDT
I stopped reading after " I PRAY TO THE GREAT ALLAH". May your pain be eternally excruciating.



 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:55:02 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Maybe God hates the .40S&W.
View Quote




 
Two things....




1. God doesn't hate the .40 S&W. He actually blessed it by allowing the simple mindedness of humanity to hate it.




2. There is no God and Kidney Stones prove it. God wouldn't create such a horrid thing. Kidney Stones prove that the Devil destroyed God and rules both Heaven and Hell. The .40 S&W is God's last gift to humanity to fight the Devil and Kidney Stones.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 7:56:30 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


I stopped reading after " I PRAY TO THE GREAT ALLAH". May your pain be eternally excruciating.

View Quote
May the Fleas of a Million Camels infest your crotch and may your arms be too small to scratch. Because that is a hell of a lot better than Kidney Stones.

 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:01:15 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:



May the Fleas of a Million Camels infest your crotch and may your arms be too small to scratch. Because that is a hell of a lot better than Kidney Stones.  
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:



Quoted:

I stopped reading after " I PRAY TO THE GREAT ALLAH". May your pain be eternally excruciating.

May the Fleas of a Million Camels infest your crotch and may your arms be too small to scratch. Because that is a hell of a lot better than Kidney Stones.  
I take that back, I just read the be nice to each other thread posted by GB. Please just don't pray to Allah.



 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:06:58 AM EDT
Op, I think it's just a series of blood clots. You will be ok but it will not be fun. Do you know what kind the stones are? Maybe you can work on preventing them?

I just had one, 7mm that took two ultrasound lithotripsys and two er visits to tame. Good luck!

Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:08:44 AM EDT
So when I had my heart attack, they cath'd my pee pee and missed.  Took a couple Mulligan's until they got the drain installed.  Poked a new hole in there for me, yep.  That felt nice when I woke up from my induced coma.  Added bonus, I can piss in the toilet and the tub simultaneously due to a fun second stream.



Penis related pain of any kind is not cool.  Unless its an over-exuberant Beej from Elizabeth Hurley or something.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:11:30 AM EDT
Quoted:
Apparently Satan isn't finished with his fun. I have already been visited earlier this year by his creation of pure hell; Kidney Stones..... Nature's Scary & Pure Evil Little Gift Of Hate. I have another one of his unborn hell spawn trying to destroy one of the few and only thing I care about.... a GOOD NIGHT'S SLEEP! I awoke with the wonderful feeling of burning hatred pain... the same type of pain that #blacklivesmatter for me and the sudden urge to go as if God was going to unleash the next great 40 day flood from my privates. Go I did and what happened wasn't the massive torrent of relief but instead the feeling of fire and brimstone along with a blood so red, it was black.... as black as the darkest pits of hell where the Devil comes up with such horrid thoughts. So right now I am in Hospital once more and loving the Dilaudid.



And this post cannot be complete without a rant of course.


YOU FUCKING COCK SUCKING SHIT EATING PIECE OF FAILURE. I PRAY TO THE GREAT ALLAH THAT HE WILL DELCARE A HOLY JIHAD AGAINST YOU AND CAST YOU INTO THE NEITHER REGIONS OF HELL WHERE YOU WILL FOREVER LICK THE TAINT OF NANCY PELOSI WHILE HAVING HITLER DIDDLE YOUR ASS WITH HIS COCK. I FUCKING HOPE THE WITCH DOCTORS OF THE DARK CONTINENT WILL RIP OUT YOUR EYES, BOIL THEM, AND INJECT THEM INTO YOUR TESTICLES, AFTER WHICH THEY DISMEMBER YOU ALIVE AND SELL YOU TO THE CHINESE AS FOLKLORE MEDICINE FOR GENITAL WARTS. KIDNEY STONE; YOUR EXISTENCE IS THAT OF PURE FUCKING SHIT COVERED HELL. I FUCKING HATE YOU. I WILL FUCKING DESTROY YOU. I WILL MAKE IT MY LIFE'S MISSION TO ERADICATE YOU FROM THE SURFACE OF THE EARTH... NO... THE UNIVERSE ITSELF. THE PURSUIT OF WEALTH, WOMEN, POWER, ETERNAL LIFE, AND EVEN THE CURE FOR AID COVERED SHIT STAINED CANCER WILL BE NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT I WILL DO YOU DESTROY YOU.


FUCKING FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKTARTED FUCKED FUCKING FUCK!
 
View Quote



Citric acid dissolves/prevents stones.  Start squeezing lemon juice into your water. It may not help this particular spawn of Satan but will help from further siblings growing in you.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:11:59 AM EDT
Just wait until you get too many stones and they block your urinary tract and set up sepsis , 106 degree fever really sucks followed by emergency surgery .
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:26:11 AM EDT
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:

  Two things....


1. God doesn't hate the .40 S&W. He actually blessed it by allowing the simple mindedness of humanity to hate it.


2. There is no God and Kidney Stones prove it. God wouldn't create such a horrid thing. Kidney Stones prove that the Devil destroyed God and rules both Heaven and Hell. The .40 S&W is God's last gift to humanity to fight the Devil and Kidney Stones.
View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
Quoted:
Maybe God hates the .40S&W.

  Two things....


1. God doesn't hate the .40 S&W. He actually blessed it by allowing the simple mindedness of humanity to hate it.


2. There is no God and Kidney Stones prove it. God wouldn't create such a horrid thing. Kidney Stones prove that the Devil destroyed God and rules both Heaven and Hell. The .40 S&W is God's last gift to humanity to fight the Devil and Kidney Stones.


so the clear solution is to shoot the kidney stones out with something chambered in .40 S&W.

But seriously OP, feel better
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:32:27 AM EDT
Pussy.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:50:16 AM EDT
TL/DR

but 6.66/10 for effort.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:55:37 AM EDT


Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:
  Two things....
1. God doesn't hate the .40 S&W. He actually blessed it by allowing the simple mindedness of humanity to hate it.
2. There is no God and Kidney Stones prove it. God wouldn't create such a horrid thing. Kidney Stones prove that the Devil destroyed God and rules both Heaven and Hell. The .40 S&W is God's last gift to humanity to fight the Devil and Kidney Stones.


View Quote View All Quotes
View All Quotes
Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:





Quoted:


Maybe God hates the .40S&W.



  Two things....
1. God doesn't hate the .40 S&W. He actually blessed it by allowing the simple mindedness of humanity to hate it.
2. There is no God and Kidney Stones prove it. God wouldn't create such a horrid thing. Kidney Stones prove that the Devil destroyed God and rules both Heaven and Hell. The .40 S&W is God's last gift to humanity to fight the Devil and Kidney Stones.


This does explain a lot that's happened since 1990.




 
 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 8:59:51 AM EDT
That's an ouchie for sure.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 9:06:28 AM EDT
Mrs. JBT need a new necklace?

Link Posted: 9/1/2015 9:17:20 AM EDT
Would that OTC Drug AZZO Standard that wemon take for Bladder Infections help with the pain?

It was my understanding that is provided some level on numbing effect in the bladder area.

I could be wrong, but my MIL and Wife always took that stuff when they had UTI's.

* My dad just had surgery at Duke to remove one the size of his thumb.

Good Luck.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 9:26:41 AM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Mrs. JBT need a new necklace?

http://media.trb.com/media/photo/2011-10/65704580.jpg

View Quote




 

Link Posted: 9/1/2015 9:28:55 AM EDT
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 9:32:03 AM EDT
My ex gets them all the time. She thinks her love for cheese did it. I eat less and drinks lotsa water in hopes of preventing this....
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 12:05:43 PM EDT
Quoted:
FUCKING FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKTARTED FUCKED FUCKING FUCK!
View Quote


That's putting it mildly.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 12:10:09 PM EDT
Dibs on 3rd Gen collection???











Link Posted: 9/1/2015 12:28:11 PM EDT

Discussion ForumsJump to Quoted PostQuote History
Quoted:


Dibs on 3rd Gen collection???







View Quote




 






Ummmmm....




No.






Link Posted: 9/1/2015 12:29:37 PM EDT
FBHO
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 1:17:39 PM EDT
I've got a little one percolating around in my left kidney.  Sharp, stabbing pains this morning when I started moving around.





Maybe the little fucker will just pass without too much trouble.  It's probably quite small.







Maybe I'll get lucky.







Maybe.







Fuck.


 
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 1:24:38 PM EDT
10/10 plenty of fucks...
Lots of cowbell! Fantastic work sir!!!!!!!!!!
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 1:39:28 PM EDT
That's quite a lucid rant under the effects of dilaudid. Or as my late wife called it de-la-la.

Hope you feel better.
Link Posted: 9/1/2015 1:52:33 PM EDT
9.8/10

Needs a reference to Pakistani tech support for perfection.
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