You guys make Baby Jesus cry.

It's a tough job, but somebody's gotta do it. You're lucky to have us on the job, and you know it.

You’re right. I am lucky. Y’all compensate for the almost total lack of assholes in my day-to-day real life.

Can't make that shit up! I read that whole thread, saw the post but it didn't register that it was HIM.

Where did you go?

Asking for someone without internet.

You’re not an asshole.

This is probably too much thread drift, so if anyone feels that way let me know and I'll delete this post.

I observed an interesting male-female dynamic that Arfcom always talks about last night.

I spent the afternoon trimming trees in 108 degree heat, so about 9 pm I told my wife we'd go to Braum's in the closest town and get some ice cream. We were sitting there eating when a group of young (late teen to 20-ish) kids walked in.  Three boys and five girls.  After they got their orders, they came and sat in the alcove we were in, there was a big round corner table and another table that would seat 6.

One of the boys was fit, what I consider a good-looking kid (no homo), carried himself well, confident and outgoing, big smile, squared up, etc.  One was about as fit and decent looking, but slumped and quiet, no smile, hair looked like shit, not as clean looking.  The third was just average, slight gut, didn't carry himself well (slumped shoulders, drug his feet when he walked, lazy looking), unkempt in general.  All of the girls were fit and trim, nice bodies, tanned up, three were very attractive and the other two slightly better than average. No tattoos visible amongst the group, male or female.

When they sat down, the confident, fit boy scooted to the middle of the round booth, and the 4 best looking girls surrounded him, two on each side.  The other two guys sat next to each other at the big table, and the last girl sat across from them, but at the closest seat next to the other table.  They were all still close enough to interact with the other table, and did so.

I just thought it was funny, and pointed it out to my wife, who laughed as well.  All the girls got as close to the confident, squared-up guy as they could, while the ones who didn't carry themselves as well were kinda left out, even though the odds looked good as far as M/F ratio went.  We left before them, but I took a phone call in the truck so sat there for a few minutes talking as the cell service in our area is crappy and spotty.  When they came out, the guys all left together, the girls traveled 3 in one car, 2 in another.  I have no idea the relationship dynamic of the group (whether any are dating, all just friends, etc.).  I just thought it was funny and fits into what a lot of guys preach on here.

Goddamn I'm glad to be married.

Attached File

Lions: 4

Christians: 0

Over the years I have been keeping count. You now owe me 3274 keyboards!

My first thought here in the story was:
- Chad^TM is going there with his girlfriend, his sergeants, and the girlfriend's gal pals.
The hope would be that one of the other men (Brad^TM, his second in command) "lucks out" and one of the gal pal allows him mating rights.



IMHO the physical fitness part - while it does matter, I think it matters even MORE to young people.
As a man - at 20 you're not about to show up in a BMW YOU Purchased, coming from a house YOU own - that you pay for with the GOOD job you have RIGHT NOW, after completing college, paying for the debt and all that, in 2022.
Just very very rare.
I'm sure like 90% of GD has done it, but it's a tough thing to do.


Women want a guy who is Somebody^TM in the tribe, to some degree he's successful in a dominance hierarchy.
This seems to hold with age, it just manifests differently.
In Highschool you have a small amount of avenues.
Muh sports, muh drama, muh music, etc.
The academic guys who are "Nerds", might have good options amongst the nerdy girls in that cluster. (I've seen it.)
The guys who bring their acoustic guitars - girls who like music probably hang around them.
etc.


The tall handsome athletic kid, at that age, he's king.
Now imagine he's at least somewhat intelligent.
Now imagine time goes on.
He's had dating options since probably middle school - that's when he might have developed first.
He's tall, (and this is before the gym/muscles become all that important, though that age is coming), so the other boys respect him.
His brain gets happy-chemicals concerning where he fits in the dominance hierarchy.
He has dating options from the time he's young.

The story might go like this.
He's in highschool, he's a senior, where the gaps between seniors and freshmen are pretty savage .
And the reality is: Girls from all 4 years of that school want to talk to him him to figure out she wants him to talk to her, so he goes and talks to her.
He's got his main girl, some of her friends like him.
There's that girl the junior who is better looking than any of the girls in his class that he catches staring at him from time to time.
He thinks about it.
There's the freshman who giggles if he walks by, etc etc.
And a few dozen more like them.

It's occurred to him that he has options.

He goes to college.
Dominance hierarchy resets a little bit.
BUT he's one of the few male freshman with a girlfriend.
Time goes on, the highschool dynamic plays out a bit.

Graduates.
Same thing.
Time goes by.
He's 34 now.
He now has nice things.
A place to live, a nice enough car, he's still handsome and athletic.
Confidence has gotten better with age.
He doesn't have Patrice O'Neal tier game, but it's good enough, he doesn't need much because: Handsome AF.

Yeah you know who this guy ISN'T looking at for marriage?
A fat 4 with a "Great job."
That's the bullshit you see on my coast.

"Omg I'm gunna rope thisss!"
Girl you are trying to take a fucking Big5 game animal with a fucking nerf-gun.

Completely tangential, but it’s a bucket list item of mine to bag a Cape buffalo. I might break a clavicle in the process, but it’s gonna happen.

"Babe is this muzzle brake rated for .375 H&H?"
[Husband looks up from newspaper] "..... uhhhh.. why?"

A couple of decades ago, I was hooked on Capstick’s writings.  I credit him with sending me on a few trips to Africa, and hunting the Big 5.  All I can say is, make it happen at any cost.  You won’t regret it. Not just the hunting, but the whole experience. Just be careful in this day and age, Americans are not as safe as they once were.  

@Geralt55

Great interpretation of my night’s experience.  I was hoping you’d check in. Very similar to my thoughts, but I couldn’t have put it into words.

My initial impression was that the “Brad” could have been as successful as the “Chad” if he would have only had some self-confidence.  From a 53 year old man’s perspective (a lot of experience talking here) he had everything required except the self-confidence.  He was playing from a loser’s mentality vs. a winner’s mentality, with all the same attributes on the table.  But a HUGE difference in outcome.  

He knows better than to ask why. 20+ years has taught him that if he has to ask why, he probably doesn’t want to know the answer.

But he knows I want to hunt Cape Buffalo. And I know he wants to hunt Warthog. We’ll make it happen.

I'm being reminded of one of those sayings in sports.
"Talent sets the ceiling, but character sets the floor."
The stuff between your ears counts for something
Maybe in the hormone-driven 18-22 gap it's a muddier picture, but after that and as time goes on, it counts for more. At least that's what I'm seeing.

I think if a guy's sort of afraid of himself, of the world, and moreso- of women (and worse: A pretty one), she's out.

It's uncomfortable for a high agreeableness woman realizing that she's being forced to decide on her interest level on a guy she does not know - because the guy's turning purple just looking at her.
Worse: If she's not sure/rejects the guy, he's going to implode.

High stress shit sandwich.
She's going to want to avoid the whole thing.

Chad, despite his buffoonery, arrogance, etc - she's less likely to hurt him and "make it awkward."

I will say though, being "concensus handsome" is like having 12 seconds in the pocket, a great offensive line
You get a LOT more time and opportunities, you have a lot of wiggle room.

It's neat, what you saw.
Brad was not far off at all but just couldn't will himself to get out of his shell, not understanding that the "gap" between him and Chad was way smaller than he might think it was.

Yesterday three women called me this for not playing by their rules.

Sight unseen I'm going to say that's probably not why.

Here's a list of some of my "backwards" views (that many people still hold) that if approached inartfully would cause problems at a friend's BBQ.
I've phrased them insensitively for dramatic effect:

Click To View Spoiler

If I kept talking and laid it out in THOSE terms, I'd upset a lot of people. Understandably so.
That's not their fault, it's mine.

You don't LEAD with that.
I don't fucking go around in public broadcasting all that, in inartful terms that they can't grapple with, just for shock value.
That would be easy

Don't say dumb shit for "points" with people who aren't in the room. It sabotages relationships.

Keep the toxic stuff to yourself.
Let it out in drips, carefully explained if you have to.

Sure you might not have been interested in those girls at the party.
But one of her friends you would have met 4 months from now (After being invited back), might have found you cute.

"Oh that's Derp, he's a good guy, funny guy "
^ you need THAT to keep happening to get social proof.
Social proof helps with these women.
Social proof on that small scale is like a very diluted version of how "fame" works.
They know who you are and have reason to believe you're a safe experience.


Look, just about all men are flawed, just ask their wives
They love them anyway.

What I'm saying is, reign it in man.

This is something that really hits hard for me, as I feel that I am just a nobody. That in and of itself doesn't bother me - in fact, I actually prefer it most of the time. I tend to avoid recognition when possible, doing things anonymously whenever I am able. I would prefer to be assisting from backstage than be in the spotlight. But for this specific situation, that's not so advantageous.

Additionally, there is the related topic of "what is your tribe". I have always struggled to find somewhere that I felt I belonged. Many things that started out seeming to be a case of finally finding my place fell apart in short order. At most of the events I attend (and which I enjoy a lot), I often feel like a bit of a poseur in comparison to the rest of those in attendance.



If my main circle of friends knew my personal stance on certain topics, I would very likely not be welcome around them any longer. And I know I would absolutely be kicked out of almost all of the online communities I am a part of if I voiced my opinions on the same.

I don't pretend to be somebody I'm not, but rather just avoid those topics of conversation. I don't see it as hiding who I am really either, as I don't like to talk about those subjects much in the first place, and if I were ever asked directly about them, I would answer honestly, even knowing the consequences.

got shot down by a couple more hot dirty inkie nurses, didja?

@RTX

I normally encourage women to go with their gut - intuition, whatever you want to call it. In many or most cases, if their gut is giving them a warning, there's likely something to it. In this particular case, if only 1/3 of the women was correct....?

There is a fine line between being polite, having a polite conversation and “hiding who you are” imho

My comments in red.

Two inked and one fatty, no clue what jobs they have.

3/3

I understand you're desperate, but hitting on a fatty is just fucking sick.

Not really desperate, more like tired of all this shit.

Well, I don’t think you’re asshole.  But I make a distinction between a socially inept gynophobe and an asshole. Those women may not.

You mean one of these inked slutty friend who isn't better?  

Scuba class, town historical society, and woodcarving. The last one I didn’t expect women, but I wanted to take it anyway. Enrich yourself and good company will find you interesting.

Or, to be cynical, let a woman see you being happy. They can’t stand the sight of a content man, so they are obliged to enter your life to rectify the situation.

Attached File

MGTOW thread.

Whereever I go, no interesting women there.








Don't work either.


Maybe I should just stop giving a shit and take the first dumb inked slut with big tits.

You sound like you have so much resentment built up toward those darn dirty critters called women that it might be time to consider admitting that you have homosexual tendencies. Seriously, women aren't for everyone - or else there wouldn't be any gay men. Admit you're one of them and move on with life. You actually sound miserable, and I can only see you making some woman miserable if you found one to put up with you, anyway.

Absolutely not.

Well, start by listing the things you do outside the house besides work, shopping, and chores.

Okay, if you say so. On the other hand, it might be time for you to quit fighting it and just bite the fucking pillow. Nobody here really cares if you're gay.

No, don’t do that.  Find a clinical psychologist who specializes in treating obcessive-compulsive disorders and get your headbolts retorqued.

Then go find a dumb inked slut with big tits and have some good clean fun for the first time in your miserable, tortured life.

Yeah, do this 4xgm. But when you get carried away with her and find yourself actually having a good time - kissing her, licking the sweat off her tits, etc. - remember that some guy like Jamal Pettigrew prolly gave her a facial and hosedown boob job last night. Then you can come back here and talk about how trashy women are again.

You can't talk me into that I'm having a disorder for being too picky.




My life isn't miserable, it's quite good. Only missing a partner.  

Don't forget, no sex without a least a dozen or more dates within a couple of weeks and a health check.

If she dates any other guys in the same time, no way it would waste another minute with her.

is it?

you don't seem happy.

how many times has this worked for you?

and what does the "health check" entail?

Say what you will, you’re doing the best impression of an absolutely miserable obsessive-compulsive personality I’ve ever seen. And I’ve known some pretty miserable obsessive-compulsive people.

Cuz, I'm getting the impression this guy is just scared of getting pussy on him. A dozen dates in two weeks is stupid, and not wanting her to date anybody else when they first start dating is wacko possessive.

He can't really be that out of touch, so there's got to be another explanation. Scared of pussy is the only thing I can think of.

Correct. In those instances where I feel something of a poseur, it is because of an apparent large discrepancy in knowledge and/or skill between myself and the rest of the attendees/members. It's not that I have no knowledge or skill concerning the subject at hand, it's just that the vast majority of the others are very clearly way beyond my level.

This is separate from some of the cases where I just feel out of place these days - the main one there being my motorcycling group, which has turned from general riding into mostly just "trackday buddies" now. As I've never been on the track and don't have much interest in doing so, it leaves me feeling the odd man out most of the time these days.



Well, the definition of "friend" does vary. I know some here on these boards whose definition means I have never had an actual friend. I do wish there was some better word to indicate those who you know better than an acquaintance but not to the point of being a "true friend", but as I don't know of one, I simply call them friends.

As it is, I fit in well enough. There is plenty of common stuff to always have conversation about. It's just that there are certain things on which we most definitely do not align - and I'd guess that none of them are even aware of my stance on those subjects. (Which I think is actually probably very typical for a lot of left-leaning types: they do not realize the number of people around them who don't subscribe to the whacky views they do.)

As to gravitating elsewhere... easier said than done. I don't know where I would even go to find people who would be more likely to align with me on more things. One of my coworkers is pretty like-minded, but he's also very not-social: he pretty much just keeps to his wife and kids. I have considered going back to church, but that's a potential can of worms as well - I am a believer, but had a falling out years ago... I'm not big on organized religion in general these days, and more importantly, the views I have arrived after my own study and reflection at are at odds with most mainstream denominations. (As in they would be considered heretical.) I already am out at car and motorcycle events, without too much more to explore in that area that I know of (in terms of local groups, events, and such). I'll be out at karaoke tonight, but that's mainly my existing circle of friends.