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Obviously you guys have never the legend of... VIN DISIEL!
Vin Diesel defeated Forrest Gump in 99 straight games of ping pong. After losing the 100th game, he went on a rampage and created the Grand Canyon. Vin Diesel is bisexual: he likes both women and girls. If all living things are carbon based, what is carbon made up of? Three parts Vin Diesel and a pinch of John Stamos. Vin Diesel ate Gary Coleman for a dollar. Vin Diesel once destroyed a Catholic orphanage after a nun neglected to put "The" before his name when addressing him. Vin Diesel once walked down the street with a massive erection. There were no survivors. When Vin Diesel goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket. Vin Diesel is the reason why Waldo is hiding. |
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Does he smoke too?
Because I swear I saw him at Lambert airport one time. Looked dead like him, but he was smoking. he also didn't kick anyones ass, so not sure really........... |
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Chuck Norris? THe only time Chuck Norris smokes is after every kill he grinds the bones of his enemies and smokes a small portion while absorbing their soul. |
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I guess some of it is funny, but, despite his not-so-great acting, Chuck Norris is a genuinely nice guy.
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Chuck Norris killed the dinosaurs.
Australia wasn't "down under" until chuck Norris decided to put it there in 1847. Chuck Norris once invited Charlie Murphy's crew over to play horseshoes. There were no survivors. |
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Ya' know I'm only talkin' bout Chuck! |
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Chuck Norris is the only man known who has the stamina and pain resistance necessary to watch both Baby Geniuses movies in a single sitting.
As a young child, Chuck often liked to, "try this at home". This is why we now drive on the right. |
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Dude, if you don't think Chuck Norris is totally awesome, you should just kill yourself right now.
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those are pretty good, where'd you find em? I see Vin Diesel has a list also.
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Most of those type of jokes are Vin Diesel jokes. A gaming forum community started a thread making fun of a player and alot of people made some funny ones. Q: What came first; the chicken or the egg? A: Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris defied MC Hammer and touched it. If you ask Chuck Norris "How much wood would a wooodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood," Norris will promptly chuck a woodchuck through your skull. Chuck once seduced the Statue of Liberty, but her career got in the way of a lasting relationship. |
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nobody things chuck norris isn't great... so nobody has to go off themselves right now I'd think
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I think he will do it for you! |
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who do you think killed bruce lee? And Brandon Lee? ah huh.. that's right |
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There was nothing wrong with the Tower of Pisa, until chuck punched it!
A bomb didn't kill Uday and Qusay, Chuck Norris Did! Chernobyl happened because Chuck lit a fart! these are off the top of my head! |
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I'm drawing a blank, what movie is that from? |
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DodgeBall |
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Now I remember, thanks! |
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He's also the tallest midget that I've ever met. |
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Chuck is really a great guy, and so are his brothers...AND he's my alltime favorite actor.
Just remember...."In the eyes of a Texas Ranger...." HH |
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