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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:31:36 AM EDT
[#1]
Quoted: I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:32:29 AM EDT
[#2]
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? Guy here. Seriously, move on. Drop her from your life. It will be nothing but grief for you, and shit will never change. Don't put yourself through that. Sever ties. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:32:42 AM EDT
[#3]
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? Cut your losses and move on. You are being used as an emotional tampon in an entirely selfish way. 
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:32:56 AM EDT
[#4]
As a guy all I can do is quote Pearl Jam: It's no crime to escape.
Be prepared for the words "eject" "bail out" and really cool pictures of pilots punching out of their jets. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:33:42 AM EDT
[#5]
Abort.
not worth it.... of all the women friends I've had, I think maybe only 1 has EVER had the capacity to be an actual friend. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:34:49 AM EDT
[#6]
You should probably just move on. You're "friend zoned" for a reason. Usually it's complete lack of physical attraction and it's pretty unlikely that you're going to wind up getting her to change her mind.
Edit: Personal experience, when I've broken the friend zone it's been because there was always potential there but mitigating factors kept us platonic. Other times I've broken the friend zone have been because we were both intoxicated and horny . If you've got a crush on her it's going nowhere good even if she has sex with you one night. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:36:52 AM EDT
[#7]
Chick here.
It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely. That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen. 1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do). 2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all. I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all. 
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:37:48 AM EDT
[#8]
Yeah she really is a good friend but I want more and I doubt that will ever happen I do just need to drop her. thanks think I just needed to hear someone else say it.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:37:49 AM EDT
[#9]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? can't believe this. but dave might be right. 
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:42:19 AM EDT
[#10]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? Cut your losses and move on. You are being used as an emotional tampon in an entirely selfish way. this my ex is trying pull this shit chilled with her once and noticed, thats exactly what she was doing. now i just pretty much ignore her not getting anything from her current bf, so he comes to me like i wanna hear the shit, i could barely stand it when i was with her 
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:43:09 AM EDT
[#11]
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? Move on. If you must persist, try treating her like shit you'd be surprised how some girls (to immature to be woman) respond to that. Don't be the friend or the emotional tampon. The only women it is your job to listen to is the woman you are committed to or those in your immediate family. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:44:12 AM EDT
[#12]
Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off. Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:45:11 AM EDT
[#13]
Quoted:
Chick here. It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely. That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen. 1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do). 2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all. I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all. Option #4 Threesome! 
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:46:37 AM EDT
[#14]
Quoted:
Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off. Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context. 
Would this one be a bit more clear for you ?
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:47:00 AM EDT
[#15]
She's not using me to let her emotions out thats for sure. It sucks cause I haven't met many chicks like her she's not slutty, shes smart, attractive and responsible. I thought they stopped making them like this lol. I need to find a good place to meet a decent woman that will make me a sandwich on command lol.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:49:42 AM EDT
[#16]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off. Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context.
Would this one be a bit more clear for you ?
http://www.btfh.net/posting/bail-out.jpg Thanks, I don't even like guns, I just come here to collect eject pictures and I Haven;t seen that one yet. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:49:44 AM EDT
[#17]
In the time it would take you to break through the friend zone(assuming you even could), you could go get yourself several other, better girls. ETA: Like her friends EDIT She's not using me to let her emotions out thats for sure. It sucks cause I haven't met many chicks like her she's not slutty, shes smart, attractive and responsible. I thought they stopped making them like this lol. I need to find a good place to meet a decent woman that will make me a sandwich on command lol.
Aww... She's perfect for you and she just doesn't realize it? You should tell her  . Try to hook up with her friends. If she really wants to be your friend, she'll put in a good word.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:50:42 AM EDT
[#18]
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works.... I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid... Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her... |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:53:06 AM EDT
[#19]
lol this is thread 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 about another guy being stuck in the friend zone
maybe 2 or 3 of those people actually end up moving up to more than a friend and the other bazillion think they are going to beat the odds and be one of those 2 or 3, because they feel so strongly about this woman good luck dude. like most other people have said so far, try to find another one.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:56:56 AM EDT
[#20]
Don't believe any of these people!
You still have a chance, you just have to be patient, and not give up hope, but most important, keep your eye on the prize, no matter how far you stray from your goal. I had this same exact thing happen and ended up working out for me. First, you have to create space between the two of you, not so much you lose contact, but enough maybe only a E-mail now and again. Possibly chat on Facebook or Myspace. Most importantly, GET A GIRLFRIEND! If you stay all sad sack and mopey, holding out for her you won't get ANYWHERE. You flat out won't be attractive, since your NOT attracting Females. Doesn't have to be serious, just some flings to bide the time. Hell I dated a girl for 3 years, moved her down to Fla for a bit, sure took the girl out of my mind I was waiting for, then that old relationship killer of money came up, and that relationship dissolved. BUT fortunately, the stars had aligned, the girl who I had always hoped to be with, and had kept up with through sporadic messaging happened to be getting out of a relationship also! Well we talked every night on the phone for awhile (I was out of state) and next thing you know, I told her we should get together, bing bang boom I book a flight to Wa and my dream came true! 2 1/2 months later we broke up, that chick was nuttier than a squirrel turd. So the way my buddy handles situations like that, is after finding a girl that doesn't want to get with him, but he HAS to be with her; He'll sleep with her least attractive friend, then make a name for himself, working his way up building the gossip about how great he is until finally the gal he's after folds and gets with him. This is also how he ended up with the nickname "garbage dick" but it worked! So good luck! |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 12:58:57 AM EDT
[#21]
Quoted:
Don't believe any of these people! You still have a chance, you just have to be patient, and not give up hope, but most important, keep your eye on the prize, no matter how far you stray from your goal. I had this same exact thing happen and ended up working out for me. First, you have to create space between the two of you, not so much you lose contact, but enough maybe only a E-mail now and again. Possibly chat on Facebook or Myspace. Most importantly, GET A GIRLFRIEND! If you stay all sad sack and mopey, holding out for her you won't get ANYWHERE. You flat out won't be attractive, since your NOT attracting Females. Doesn't have to be serious, just some flings to bide the time. Hell I dated a girl for 3 years, moved her down to Fla for a bit, sure took the girl out of my mind I was waiting for, then that old relationship killer of money came up, and that relationship dissolved. BUT fortunately, the stars had aligned, the girl who I had always hoped to be with, and had kept up with through sporadic messaging happened to be getting out of a relationship also! Well we talked every night on the phone for awhile (I was out of state) and next thing you know, I told her we should get together, bing bang boom I book a flight to Wa and my dream came true! 2 1/2 months later we broke up, that chick was nuttier than a squirrel turd. So the way my buddy handles situations like that, is after finding a girl that doesn't want to get with him, but he HAS to be with her; He'll sleep with her least attractive friend, then make a name for himself, working his way up building the gossip about how great he is until finally the gal he's after folds and gets with him. This is also how he ended up with the nickname "garbage dick" but it worked! So good luck! +1...See??? Someone on here agrees with me....It works!!! |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:03:09 AM EDT
[#22]
Ugh. This poor guy. You can ask folks here how to take a bandaid off and you'll get everything from "do it quick" to "really slow and enjoy the pain." Where the hell are all the kickass eject pictures? must be the day crew that has those
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:03:47 AM EDT
[#23]
Quoted: You should probably just move on. You're "friend zoned" for a reason. Usually it's complete lack of physical attraction and it's pretty unlikely that you're going to wind up getting her to change her mind. Edit: Personal experience, when I've broken the friend zone it's been because there was always potential there but mitigating factors kept us platonic. Other times I've broken the friend zone have been because we were both intoxicated and horny. If you've got a crush on her it's going nowhere good even if she has sex with you one night. OP is currently driving to the liquor store. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:05:07 AM EDT
[#24]
Thanks guys think Im gonna just stop talking to her and try to move on I got enough chick friends lol. Maybe when I get a new phone I will get a new number too.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:07:49 AM EDT
[#25]
Quoted:
Thanks guys think Im gonna just stop talking to her and try to move on I got enough chick friends lol. Maybe when I get a new phone I will get a new number too. Well if you don't really really like her––then yeah move on...But if you like her it is worth it to stay and see what happens... |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:08:46 AM EDT
[#26]
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:15:10 AM EDT
[#27]
So true. edit- about the link, not the OP being a cuddle whore. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:15:27 AM EDT
[#28]
I do like her it's just that when I'm around her I'm not looking at other women i'm only focusing on her and I just feel like I'm wasting time. I think that if she changes her mind she would come to me
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:19:29 AM EDT
[#29]
Quoted:
I do like her it's just that when I'm around her I'm not looking at other women i'm only focusing on her and I just feel like I'm wasting time. I think that if she changes her mind she would come to me You are 100% correct on ALL of that. You are being distracted by her, you are wasting time, and if she does EVER change her mind, she may just as well come calling. So, basically, get your balls out of her purse, your NOT in a relationship, you CAN go after other girls and bide your time. And for GODS SAKE read that "ladders" web page!!! If I'd have read that before I got started in the dating world I'd have been better off! |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:21:47 AM EDT
[#30]
Like I said, the fastest way to get with her is to spend time with other women. As soon as she realizes that she doesn't have that power over you anymore, it's fair game.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:24:07 AM EDT
[#31]
Quoted:
Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off. Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context. Anna is right. You need to think about her, rub one out, rinse and repeat a few times. Then you will begin to realize that is the most its goanna be. If you really want to spice it up tell her about it. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:24:28 AM EDT
[#32]
For what it's worth, and some here will disagree, no harm in being a friend and interested. The rub comes when you put the blinders on and can't see what else is available to you. When you start ignoring what have for what if. Most people can't handle this, and I think why it's usually the common advice to just run away. Not to slam you OP, but, it sounds like you should take the commonly held advice. I had to at one point, too. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:24:34 AM EDT
[#33]
Yeah I will read that later today going to bed think last 2 posts are the advice I'm going with thanks a lot guys, have a good one.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:26:18 AM EDT
[#34]
Stand outside her house during the night and wait for her to look out the window. Then flash her your wang. Chicks dig that kind of persistance.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:29:30 AM EDT
[#35]
Quoted:
Stand outside her house during the night and wait for her to look out the window. Then flash her your wang. Chicks dig that kind of persistance. Ahh, the "trolling" technique. I don't know if our OP is wise enough in the ways of the world to pull that one off yet. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 1:33:07 AM EDT
[#36]
Quoted:
Yeah I will read that later today going to bed think last 2 posts are the advice I'm going with thanks a lot guys, have a good one. Don't forget to wash your hands. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 2:57:30 AM EDT
[#37]
BTDT bail dude. I like the analogy from earlier, you like ripping the bandaid off or peeling it off slow? Just bail. Don't let this chick treat you like her girlfriend any longer, because I can tell by your post that she is. You want to waste your life being a chicks bitch? Absolutely disregard the advice of those telling you to stick it out, you have a better chance of winning the lotto.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:00:19 AM EDT
[#38]
she views you as a friend because there is no hope for you, ever
trust me when a chick mentions being "just friends" you don't have a chance you aren't hot/cool/rich enough to date them |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:07:03 AM EDT
[#39]
Quoted:
I got enough chick friends lol. Why do you have so many "chick friends"? I think your problem goes quite a bit deeper then this one girl if you have a lot of "chick friends". |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:09:18 AM EDT
[#40]
Quoted:
Chick here. It *could* change, but it isn't horribly likely. That being said, if you actually like her, keep her as a friend. Then, when you find the next girl you want to date, one of two things will happen. 1. Current chick will be able to suitably advise you on your path to success with new chick (that's what friends do). 2. Current chick will develop green-eyed-monster syndrome, and decide you are date-worthy after all. I suppose the 3rd option, and, unfortunately, maybe most likely, is current chick will develop GEMS, remain in denial, and give you shitty advice, being all catty and all. 4th possibility.....future threesome damn nevermind been said already thats what i get for getting stuck on the redheads post
in that case..you have recieved the kiss of death ..lets be friends |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:41:17 AM EDT
[#41]
Quoted:
Off topic but to me this picture just looks like it advocates jerking off. Guess it can be appropriate to thread in either context. Well sometimes the night isn't generous to all of us |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:54:22 AM EDT
[#42]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? Yep, you lost right there. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 3:59:13 AM EDT
[#43]
If she truly is a good friend she will set you up with some of her friends. As soon as she finds a cock she wants, you'll be a distant memory.
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:02:48 AM EDT
[#44]
Ditch her but have some fun doing it. The next time you are with her start complaining about this girl that just keeps leading you on and when she starts calling the girl a bitch and saying you deserve more stand up and tell her "It's you, you fuking basket case"
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:18:16 AM EDT
[#45]
Roofies dude, roofies
No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:26:39 AM EDT
[#46]
Quoted: Roofies dude, roofies No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can. That's a really cynical attitude. What's wrong with having a friend?  |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:32:50 AM EDT
[#47]
Quoted:
Quoted:
Roofies dude, roofies No, seriously, you need to start tapering off the "friendship" you are never going to get what you want, and she is going to use you for as long as she can. That's a really cynical attitude. What's wrong with having a friend?
When one friend is more emotionally attached than the other generally the one with less emotional attachment is in a position of power and the one with the more attachment is letting life pass them by in hopes that the other will change. If both are on a friendship level then that is fine but that isn't what we have here. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:33:13 AM EDT
[#48]
Quoted:
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works.... I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid... Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her... TRUTH here. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:36:47 AM EDT
[#49]
Quoted: Quoted: I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? A good relationship always starts out as friends...Just hang in there...Maybe she will come around...Trust me this works.... I started out with the hubby as just friends. Thought he was cool to hang with and then I saw him talking to another girl and that is when I knew...He hung in there (I had just gotten out of a really shitty relationship and didn't want to get into another) but then when I saw him talking to other girls––that was it for me...11 years later––married with a kid... Us women are some strange beings––-hang in there––especially if you really really like her... This is sound advice. I have seen this scenario played out countless times. Really troll looking guys ending up marrying beautiful, on the ball women because they were persistent. As mentioned by cbf above, she needs to see that other women are interested in you, and that may well close the deal. Not a guaranty by any stretch, but slow and steady does usually win the race. Women generally don't know what they want...but they DO know they want what other women want. If you want to go full Machiavellian, I'd even PAY some decent looking girls to come up and start flirting with you the next time you are out with this girl. There are no rules in love and war! I should add, though, that a relationship not built on Christ will be a rough ride. I learned this the hard way. |
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Posted: 9/19/2009 4:38:51 AM EDT
[#50]
Quoted:
I really like this chick I've been hanging out with for a while, and I asked her out a while back and she said she just views me as a friend. I really like hanging out with her and she still likes to hang out with me but sometimes it just really gets me down cause I'm not with her. For a while now I have been debating bout whether or not to hang out with her and was wondering how often any of you end up going with a guy you viewed as just a friend? BTDT Move on. Unless you like the drama. Because if you do, ARFCOM sure likes seeing train wrecks. |
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