Father O'Leary is doing confession one Sunday when he realizes he has to pee. He peeks his head out of the confessional and sees a group of altar boys sitting in the pews. He calls out for one and asks the little boy to take his place while he goes to the bathroom.
"Whenever they enter, allow them to confess, and using this list, give them the appropriate repentance."
There is a list posted on his side of the confessional:
"For theft, 6 Hail Marys. For murder, 12 Hail Marys and an hour of silent prayer," and so on.
The priest asks, "Do you understand?"
The boy nods and proceeds to wait. Along comes a lady who enters the confessional and begins, "Father, it's been two weeks since my last confession."
The boy, in a low, manly voice responds, "Yes, go on my child." She tells him that she gave a blow job to a man who was not her husband.
The boy scans the list saying to himself, "blow job, blow job, where's the friggin blow job?"
Well there's no listing for blow job, so he looks out and whispers to another altar boy, "Hey Tony, what does Father O'Leary give for a blow job?"
Tony answers, "A handful of Gummi Bears and a Snickers bar."