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Posted: 1/23/2006 4:46:27 AM EDT
Ve vil haff no Komplainink in ze Kompani! Alles Klar?
 ...thought control... it's the 'German way'... German firm bans office whingers By Tristana Moore BBC News, Berlin Ramona Wonneberger's Be happy website spreads the message "Germany is a country of complainers," says Thomas Kuwatsch. "Some people complain about everything, the weather, the train is late, the coffee is bad or they whinge about high fuel prices. If you go to India, they're happy if their train arrives at all. We complain about stupid things in Europe." Mr Kuwatsch works for an IT company called "Nutzwerk", which is based in Leipzig. It is a small firm, which employs 16 people. But there is something that distinguishes Nutzwerk from other companies. Employees can be fired if they are caught complaining in the office. It may sound absurd, but employees have a clause in their contracts which states: "moaning and whinging at Nutzwerk is forbidden... except when accompanied with a constructive suggestion as to how to improve the situation". Negative energy Ramona Wonneberger, chief executive of Nutzwerk, came up with the idea. She claims that "negative energy" puts a dampener not just on workers' moods, but also on productivity. If people are sad or bad-tempered, they don't concentrate on their work Thomas Kuwatsch Nutzwerk employee "If you want to have fun in your company, and you want to reach a big target you have no chance if your employees are always angry," she says, smiling broadly. "They waste time, and they waste the company's time." Ramona Wonneberger has set up her own website, called Be happy, to spread her message across the country. When I arrive at the company in Leipzig, it is a cold, grey winter's day. As soon as I open the main door, two ebullient receptionists greet me. "Please can we take your coats?" they ask, with smiles beaming across their faces. It soon dawned on me that everyone in the office abided by the policy. At lunchtime, the workers sit together, exchanging amusing stories and cracking jokes. The firm says turnover has doubled since whingeing was banned "I'm so pleased that whingeing is not allowed," says Cathleen Sochor, who has been with the firm for several years. "My friends tell me it's strange, they call it a 'miracle' company. And when I meet my friends, and they start complaining about something, I'm always silent in the corner, as I have nothing to be grumpy about. "I don't feel I'm being watched, or observed in the office. I am always like this, I laugh and I like laughing. It's good for your character, happiness is very important." Nearby, one wall was covered with photos full of happy faces - the pictures had been taken on a work trip to Majorca. The ban on whingeing is taken seriously. So far, three employees have been dismissed. Two workers had been given repeated warnings, and one woman chose to go voluntarily. Contagious atmosphere But doesn't all this smack of a "Big Brother" state? "Look, we don't have any cameras or microphones in the office," says Mr Kuwatsch. "You control yourself, you control your moods. We say to everyone who works here: if you're not in a good mood, then just stay at home. If people are sad or bad-tempered, they don't concentrate on their work. I think that all the people who work here are happier, both in the workplace and in their private lives." To people who have just joined Nutzwerk, the friendly atmosphere is contagious. "I'm so happy when I come to work," says Damola Babalola, who is from Nigeria and has been working in the company for the last five months. "My colleagues are like my family. Everyone is so friendly and relaxed. We never have cause to complain, and even if we did, we'd make a constructive suggestion." According to Mrs Wonneberger, the company's turnover has doubled since the anti-whingeing policy was introduced. "I hope that when you leave our company now, you have a good feeling," says Ramona Wonneberger, as I was saying goodbye. I look outside. It is still snowing and the sun is obscured by a blanket of grey clouds. I don't dare grumble about the weather. Instead, I smile and as I leave the building, I feel a sense of relief. http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/4599004.stm |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:09:39 AM EDT
[#1]
Yup, .mil should take note. Need to improve moral? "Be happy or we'll shoot your ass!!!", is all that's needed. After that you don't hear many complaints so they must be happy.
 Whatever. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:14:47 AM EDT
[#2]
Damn fine idea right there. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:18:16 AM EDT
[#3]
He said "Nutzwerk"
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:19:05 AM EDT
[#4]
Being that this is America, the goddammed BIRTHPLACE of bitching about everything under the sun, I'd like to register a complaint:
What the f*ck is a "whinger"? Doesn't anybody even know how to piss & moan right anymore! |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:22:58 AM EDT
[#5]
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:36:19 AM EDT
[#6]
whinge = whine, complain, kvetch, bitch. See? Ya learn sumpin' here at ARFKOM. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:36:43 AM EDT
[#7]
Works for me...bitching and moning is a cancer in the work place. I just gave one of my employees
his last warning. He said he's honestly not aware that he's been a chronic complainer. 
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:40:21 AM EDT
[#8]
It's a British term, as in "Stop your whinging." (Whinge rhymes with 'binge' or 'hinge') It means whining or constantly complaining. My wife is British, and I've had to learn a whole new language.
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:40:56 AM EDT
[#9]
It's a play on words. Netzwerk* = here, means "network" as in a "network of cables". "Nutz-" = here, "useful, worthwhile". Nutzwerk = "useful network". *pronounced "Noots'-vairk" |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:43:49 AM EDT
[#10]
The beatings will continue until morale improves.
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:44:42 AM EDT
[#11]
Oh yeah? Well my noots verk just vine, thank you, and you can keep your commie language! |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:45:11 AM EDT
[#12]
If no whinging is supposed to make for a better workplace then why are more people leaving? Doubled turnover means that twice as many people are LEAVING this oh-so-happy company. Or is this something that got lost in translation?
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:46:12 AM EDT
[#13]
Huh- try being married to a Scotswoman- not only a wholly new "language" but a dialect of it, to boot! Och, wee Jemmy, where are ye aboot? Whit ye doon? Yer haverin', ya daft gowk! Gauny geez oss 10p, then, luv? Ach, sod off, ya grotty tosspot!
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:49:46 AM EDT
[#14]
The 'german way'? Puh-leeze give me a break. This is a private business trying some (new?) policy. How's this any different from the guy who threatened termination if his employees wouldn't stop smoking, remember that? There was a 10-page thread here about it. Or have you heard the story about that British lady who got contacted by police for 'counseling' after she said that homosexuality is unnatural in a radio interview? Try that for thought control, it's the British way. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:53:12 AM EDT
[#15]
I've lived, studied and worked full-time in Germany. It's VERY difficult to fire whiny, unproductive lazyass slackers, even at the white collar level. (You can forget about firing anybody in a union) In comparison to Americans, Germans can be an overly serious people in general, and the workplace reflects it. If Frau Wonneberger wants to make her place more pleasant, and thereby more productive, she's probably doing her company a favor by getting rid of the whinging deadwood. Not all Germans are "nattering nabobs of negativity" (thank you, Spiro Agnew). Maybe she's trying to attract positive people who just want to get on with it, do their jobs and not wreck everyone's day by being Badluck Shleprocks. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:55:05 AM EDT
[#16]
But I'm Union ... bitching is part of my contract! ETA: "whinging" is now listed as part of the new benefits package we are bringing to the table at the next contract negotiations. We recognize that American workers *must* be competetive in this global economy, and want to do our part. Thanks! |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:56:51 AM EDT
[#17]
And how about US employers who forbid employees from having guns in their cars in the parking lot? Or forbid talking about certain subjects at work, like guns? |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:57:45 AM EDT
[#18]
Hmmmmm.... Quote: So far, three employees have been dismissed. Two workers had been given repeated warnings, and one woman chose to go voluntarily. 3 sacked, 2 warned and because they had the 'wrong thoughts'..... at least when I'm in a pissed off mood I can tell the other staff i'm pissed off and to bugger off! Nutzwerk sounds like something out of the 'Stepford Wives'..  ANdy |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 5:58:18 AM EDT
[#19]
....and now he's about to sue you for making a hostile work environment for him.
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:00:19 AM EDT
[#20]
Illegals come here to do the bitching on the job that Americans won't do..... 
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:14:26 AM EDT
[#21]
We are working on "NAFTWAH" right now to address this very problem. It's the new "North American Freedom to Whinge and Holler" agreement. Should be done in time for the next Whingers to Obfuscate (WTO) meeting. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:36:47 AM EDT
[#22]
 Guarded by non-English speaking illegals who work for FATASS (Federal Aviation and Transport Agency for Security and Safety)..... -bet that'll look good in white letters on their black BDUs and windbreakers....
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:58:16 AM EDT
[#23]
Damnit you beat me to it. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 10:18:17 AM EDT
[#24]
Make no mistake, I too think this policy is stupid. It's just not like a business tradition or something. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 10:34:16 AM EDT
[#25]
In the 80's several companies put that type of policy in place. As an example of how mind-numbingly stupid this type of policy is, an employee of Milliken (large textile company in SC) was fired because he ran into a VP's office to tell the VP that a faucet had broken, but he didn't have a suggestion on how to fix it. Different people have different jobs. They know how to do different things. Just because you recognize a problem and know it needs to be fixed doesn't mean that you're the right person to make the recommendation on how it can be fixed. They had hired the guy to do corporate finance (IIRC). They didn't hire him to be a plumber, but in the end he was fired because he didn't know enough about plumbing to have been allowed to complain about the faucet leaking. According to this stupid type of policy, he should have just left the water leaking from the faucet until someone that knew enough about plumbing saw it so that they could then talk to management about getting it fixed.z |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 11:55:06 AM EDT
[#26]
I know it's not a business tradition, yet! But the way it was evangelised by the manager is worrying. German industry, and the German people, does have a habit of taking a good 'idea' that works and making it almost a religion.... Example; Recycling! it's taken sooo seriously! ANdy |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 12:47:57 PM EDT
[#27]
"Braunglas"; "Gruenglas"; "Altpapier"; "Karton"...I can still remember those signs, and having to sort everything in our trash for the recycling. Severe penalties would result, if not done right!  Funny thing is, NOW we do the same in suburban Massachusetts. We even have to pay a buck per marked town trash bag. Of course, the hypocrite enviro-liberals down the street just bag up all the recyclables, and dump them in with the trash, too. They don't have the time or inclination to sort it all.
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Posted: 1/23/2006 12:55:17 PM EDT
[#28]
Next thing you know, it'll be gossip.
And that is a good thing. |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 1:17:58 PM EDT
[#29]
I'm sure I could come up with some "solutions" to my complaints.
Complaint: "The boss is an @ss". Solution: "He should go ...." |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 1:35:38 PM EDT
[#30]
Want to really see them go nuts? Wrap up an old chicken carcass in foil, forget yourself and chuck the 'aluminium' in the the aluminum bin along with the disposable BBQ (verboten!) and the beer cans at the end of the evening.... the Kamping Fuhrer spent the morning hunting down the culprits. He was still raging around the site when we drove off at 10..  ANdy |
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Posted: 1/23/2006 1:36:35 PM EDT
[#31]
If a complaining employee is hindering productivity, they should get the ax. It is the responsibility of a company to make money. Firing chronic malcontents is often the only way to help those people stop the destructive habit of complaining.
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