Top 10 ways John Kerry might self destruct

Site Notices

TNVC Partners With Envision Technology - MARS Rangefinder Family, MARS-Lc!

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Top 10 ways John Kerry might self destruct

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:49:17 AM EDT

Top 10 ways John Kerry might self destruct

10 Shows up at the White House and throws his AFL/CIO card over the fence.

9 He starts doing Enzyte commercials hoping to get an upswing in the poles.

8 Makes a surprise announcement on Jerry Springer that he is gay and leaving Mrs Heinz for John Edwards

7 Accidental announces on "Night Line" that he has flip-flopped and has now decided to vote for Bush in November.

6 Pulls a Kennedy and shows up drunk at the RNC Convention next week.

5 Hillary takes him out in October and wins the election as a write in.

4 Found floating on a sail boat in Martha's vineyard mumbling "but I have 3 purple hearts..."

3 Goes "postal" on the EIB Network

2 Logs on to ARFCOM seeking political advice from Rik_Writer and The_Mac

and the number 1 way John Kerry might self destruct....

<drum roll Paul....>

1 Yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sgtar15

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:51:05 AM EDT

[#1]

I'm assuming you are gonna be here all week, and you want us to enjoy the buffet???

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:51:33 AM EDT

[#2]

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:51:41 AM EDT

[#3]

Quoted:

8 Makes a ~~surprise~~ announcement on Jerry Springer that he is gay and leaving Mrs Heinz for John Edwards

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:55:35 AM EDT

[#4]

Quoted:
I'm assuming you are gonna be here all week, and you want us to enjoy the buffet???

Try the pork...it's kosher.

SGtar15

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:57:19 AM EDT

[#5]

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:59:03 AM EDT

[#6]

Frog blast the vent core!

Aw, who am I kidding, nobody's going to get that...

Posted: 8/24/2004 7:59:22 AM EDT

[#7]

Bwahaha!

BigDozer66

Posted: 8/24/2004 8:00:59 AM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
Frog blast the vent core!

Aw, who am I kidding, nobody's going to get that...

One of the strongest selling games for the Macintosh is the Marathon trilogy, which consists of Marathon, Marathon Two: Durandal, and Marathon Infinity: Blood Tides of Lh'owon. One might think it's just another Doom clone, but Marathon has something few other first-person shooting games have: a fully realized literary plot. Sure, you start out as a lowly Security Officer on the colony ship Marathon, but as the games progress you find out there is a lot more to the Marathon universe than meets the eye.

Sgtar15

Posted: 8/24/2004 8:01:48 AM EDT

[#9]

He can self-destruct these days by just being himself from the sounds of it!

Posted: 8/24/2004 8:07:18 AM EDT

[#10]

Yea, and his fuse is getting shorter and shorter

Posted: 8/24/2004 8:10:08 AM EDT

[#11]

Quoted:

Try the pork...it's kosher.

SGtar15

Did I ever mention....

I ate with Jews once??

Posted: 8/24/2004 8:26:07 AM EDT

[#12]

Quoted:
Quoted:
Frog blast the vent core!

Aw, who am I kidding, nobody's going to get that...

One of the strongest selling games for the Macintosh is the Marathon trilogy, which consists of Marathon, Marathon Two: Durandal, and Marathon Infinity: Blood Tides of Lh'owon. One might think it's just another Doom clone, but Marathon has something few other first-person shooting games have: a fully realized literary plot. Sure, you start out as a lowly Security Officer on the colony ship Marathon, but as the games progress you find out there is a lot more to the Marathon universe than meets the eye.

Sgtar15

Not bad, but it's more like this:

The Pfhor also utilize the 'Conditioned Ranks', or enslaved soldiers, who are forced to fight for the empire. Conquered races make up the majority of the conditioned ranks.

These are otherwise known as Assimilated Bobs. They run towards you and explode. They always wear green uniforms. Shoot them with your pistol and they bleed yellow blood, unlike regular bobs. They also say strange things like "Don't shoot!" and "Frog blast the vent core!" and "I'm out of ammo!"

Being assimilated would explain Kerry's flip-flops pretty well. So, if you see John Kerry running towards you bleeding yellow blood, make sure you take him out before he gets too close.

Posted: 8/25/2004 12:44:37 AM EDT

[#13]

btt

Posted: 8/25/2004 12:48:16 AM EDT

[#14]

Good ones.

Also starts crying during the debates about the questions being based on real situations.

Posted: 8/25/2004 12:50:16 AM EDT

[#15]

Quoted:
1 Yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted: 8/25/2004 12:57:29 AM EDT

[#16]

Quoted:
Quoted:
1 Yeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sam.vis.nu/lj/story.dean.point.ap.jpg

Kerry might have to send out his wife for that one, I dont know if he could pull it off.

Posted: 8/25/2004 1:23:39 AM EDT

[#17]

I figured "His batteries might die" would be in there somewhere.

Posted: 8/25/2004 1:24:53 AM EDT

[#18]

Quoted:
I figured "His batteries might die" would be in there somewhere.

Maybe they will mix the tpyes they use and they will explode like the package promises.

[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Top 10 ways John Kerry might self destruct

General » General Discussion

Win a FREE Membership!

Sign up for the ARFCOM weekly newsletter and be entered to win a free ARFCOM membership. One new winner* is announced every week!

You will receive an email every Friday morning featuring the latest chatter from the hottest topics, breaking news surrounding legislation, as well as exclusive deals only available to ARFCOM email subscribers.

Warning

Confirm Action

About AR15.COM

Stay Connected

Newsletter

Contact Us