VERMONT TEMPERATURE CONVERSION CHART
+70 degrees Texans turn on the heat and unpack the thermal
underwear. People in Vermont go swimming in the rivers.
+60 degrees Floridians try to turn on the heat.
People in Vermont plant gardens.
+50 degrees Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Vermont sunbathe.
+40 degrees Italian &English cars won't start.
People in Vermont drive with the windows down.
+32 degrees Distilled water freezes.
Lake Champlain water gets thicker.
+20 degrees North Carolinians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves,
and woolly hats. People in Vermont throw on a flannel shirt.
+15 degrees Philadelphia landlords finally turn up the heat. People
in Vermont have the last cookout before it gets cold.
+10 degrees People in Miami all die...
Mt. Mansfield Union High students lick the flagpole.
-20 degrees Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Vermont get out their winter coats.
-40 degrees Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Vermont are selling cookies door to door.
-60 degrees Polar bears begin to evacuate the Arctic. Vermont Boy
Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold enough.
-80 degrees Mt. St. Helens freezes.
People in Vermont rent some videos.
-100 degrees Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
UVM students get frustrated because they can't thaw the keg.
-297 degrees Microbial life no longer survives on dairy products.
Cows in Vermont complain about farmers with cold hands.
-460 degrees ALL atomic motion stops (absolute zero in the Kelvin
scale). People in Vermont start saying, "S'pose I should throw
another log in the stove?"
-500 degrees Hell freezes over.
Vermont's Howard Dean is Elected President!