Nov 5, 2013 Fairfax, VA

In a suprise move today, the Obama Justice Department landed a stunning blow to the gun rights community.  Attorney General Eric Holder, on a stage surrounded by Federal and local law enforcement officials, and the families of several government Agents who were killed on duty by gun violence, announced Justice's new tactic in the war against violence on America's streets.

Citing a seminal study funded by former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomburg's Mayors Against Illegal Guns public safety organization, Attorney General Holder smiled broadly as he prepared to make his remarks before a group of high school students in the Washington DC suburb.

The gun rights issue is a contentious one, where a minority of Americans focus on an antiquated interpretation of the Bill of Rights.  In his remarks, Holder emphasised the day of arguing the meaning of the word "is" has passed.  In a move that had been hailed as brilliant by Democrat advisors, Attorney General Holder has successfully petitioned the courts to issue an injunction against the National Rifle Association, citing the second ammendement, et al, are the intellectual property of the Federal Government of the United States.  The order requires the NRA to immediately cease the use of language from any document of the Federal Government without the express written permission of a yet to be named Federal agency.

When reached for comment, NRA Executive Wayne LaPierre was flabbergasted, and insisted that the only thing that stops bad guys with guns is good guys with guns.  Apparently Mr. LaPierre didn't get the memo that Eric Holder is from the government, and here to help.

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My blood pressure can't handle satire anymore.

FBHO and FEH

How can it be intellectual property??

Go fuck yourself.

No shit, what's sad is that this kind of thing wouldn't surprise me if found true.

Yep.


Can I FBHO anyway?

The "antiquated view" of the 2A is not  in the Bill of Rights.

Source?

ETA: Is this satire?

How did you know what I ate for lunch?

The multiple spelling errors should be a clue.

yes and in poor taste at that.





 

So, are you saying it did come from the White House?  

Can mods go ahead and nuke threads like this, or at least flag it as retarded?

did you get this from theonion.com???

On a scale of 1 to 10, I score this satire as "shitty".

that'd be awesome!



and if it were true they should just start using "because fuck you - that's why"

OP.....I know what he's been smokin.  

So, what have you been smokin?

Aloha, Mark

And yet.......................................Water is still wet !

How can this be you say ?   Because the goverment says so, that's why.

I would love to go to Taco Bell, but we have to take this thread with us so we can enjoy the comedy.

The irony of an Eric Holder/gun control satire turning into discussion of making a run for the border

I lost in on the TacoBell gif.

why should we listen to eric fast and furious holder anyway.he probably needs more guns to sell to mexico or whatever

Ok, I'll play. "A well regulated Malitia, being necessary to the security of a free State,The right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed"
There I said it!!!!!
Come fucking sue me Eric Holder!

FPNI.

Who didn't see this coming?