general rule(s) of thumb...add yours

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Posted: 4/14/2002 6:06:36 AM EDT

- Any movie that features a couple of hundred guys with swords running at each other...is going to be pretty good.

- The guy with the bumper sticker that says "no fat chicks"...will never have ANY chick with him.

Posted: 4/14/2002 6:57:03 AM EDT

[#1]

-Anything posted by ETH or StyerAug will be debated.
[:D]

Posted: 4/14/2002 6:59:05 AM EDT

[#2]

Don't eat a a place called Mom's.

Don't play cards with a guy with a dagger for a tattoo.

Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:01:12 AM EDT

[#3]

In any matter not involving technology, the old way is the best way.

In lands that are dirt poor the guys with the guns always have quite a bit of meat on their bones.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:02:50 AM EDT

[#4]

Don't spit in the wind.

Never pet burning dogs or other domestic animals.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:06:23 AM EDT

[#5]

A gun in the hand is worth more than a cop on the phone.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:10:24 AM EDT

[#6]

Seek the truth no matter where it leads you

Franklin
[url=http://www.survivalforum.com]SurvivalForum[/url]

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:14:27 AM EDT

[#7]

Never fry bacon in the nude.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:16:45 AM EDT

[#8]

Quoted:
Seek the truth no matter where it leads you

Franklin
[url=http://www.survivalforum.com]SurvivalForum[/url]

View Quote

Okay, this isn't a rule of thumb...this fell out of a fortune cookie.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:19:04 AM EDT

[#9]

Quoted:
Never fry bacon in the nude.

View Quote

Not a real life exp. I hope?

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:19:47 AM EDT

[#10]

When all has been said and done, more will be said than done.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:22:39 AM EDT

[#11]

People who talk the most shit, usually have the least room to talk

E6

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:23:13 AM EDT

[#12]

<<>>

nope...I can think of MUCH stupider ways to earn the coveted Darwin Award [:-D]

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:25:18 AM EDT

[#13]

You don't pull the mask off the old Lone Ranger

and

You don't mess around with Jim.

do do do do

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:26:35 AM EDT

[#14]

Men are generally proud of their farts.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:37:43 AM EDT

[#15]

Never say: "I would NEVER do that".

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:37:55 AM EDT

[#16]

Don't spit into the wind.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:39:47 AM EDT

[#17]

ROT Formula for dating. Her weight should be no more than .75 times your weight.

(There are exceptions for tall women.[;)])

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:41:06 AM EDT

[#18]

A bird in the hand's worth 2 in the bush.

(But if in that bush, a maiden should be...
one bush in the hand's worth [u]three[/u] in the tree!)

[:D]

edited to add..

If it's worth doing twice, it's worth doing half-assed the first time.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:51:01 AM EDT

[#19]

Quoted:
ROT Formula for dating. Her weight should be no more than .75 times your weight.

(There are exceptions for tall women.[;)])

View Quote

-----OR------

1/2 in the bag=stay away if you can't bench press her

complete splotto= stay away if you couldn't knock her down with a running start

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:56:16 AM EDT

[#20]

It's always better to measure twice, and cut once.

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:56:47 AM EDT

[#21]

Sadly from personal experience: "Don't piss into the wind."

From business - when you need .1 additional employees you must actually hire 1.0.

Do not believe in coincidence. (Yes occasionally you'll be wrong but very, very seldom.)

Posted: 4/14/2002 7:58:53 AM EDT

[#22]

This is the original Rule Of Thumb.

You can not beat your wife with a stick any bigger than your thumb.

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:02:49 AM EDT

[#23]

The more CONvincing someone is, the less you should be persuaded.

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:05:15 AM EDT

[#24]

-Freedom is not free

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:05:55 AM EDT

[#25]

The probability of a train derailing is directly proportional to the value of it's contents.

BrenLover

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:07:29 AM EDT

[#26]

Murphy will never, EVER pass up a chance to f***with you.

And my personal favorite.....
NEVER THROW STONES IN A GLASS HOUSE!

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:07:38 AM EDT

[#27]

Don't get married.

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:08:30 AM EDT

[#28]

Keep your thumb out of your M1 Garand

If in doubt ..empty the magazine

Carry extra mags

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:09:25 AM EDT

[#29]

Incoming fire has the right of way!

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:15:38 AM EDT

[#30]

If it seems to good to be true call for backup.

Posted: 4/14/2002 8:22:47 AM EDT

[#31]

Anything worth shooting once is worth shooting a whole magazine into.

There are no good deals that last just one day.

Never use a pistol if you've got a shotgun. Never use a shotgun if you've got a rifle. Never use a rifle if you can call in artillery.

You have to upgrade your computer when the newest ones out are five times fast than your old one.

And the most important one I've learned for international travellers: [B]MEN ALWAYS HAVE AN ADAM'S APPLE[/B] no matter how well they fill out a bra. [shock]

Posted: 4/14/2002 9:12:06 AM EDT

[#32]

When all you have is a hammer, everything starts to look like a nail.

or if you work for the gorvernment... every things looks like your thumb.

-CK

Posted: 4/14/2002 9:13:07 AM EDT

[#33]

If it feels fishy, it is.

If you drop the soap, leave it where it is.

Posted: 4/14/2002 10:01:48 AM EDT

[#34]

Rule of Thumb

Never beat your wife with a stick that is larger than your thumb. It's the law HEHEHE [spank]

"Some have claimed that this phrase has its origins in a British common law rule which, supposedly, allowed husbands to beat their wives with a stick no thicker than their thumb. The British common law is part of a legal tradition which was a continuously evolving set of rules, set out in decisions on cases brought in English common law courts. It forms a large part of the basis of modern English and American law, as well as influencing the law in other, less important places."

Posted: 4/14/2002 10:07:04 AM EDT

[#35]

[size=5][b]Do not eat yellow snow[/b][/size=5]

[size=5][b]Two girls are better than just one ![/b][/size=5]

Posted: 4/14/2002 10:12:15 AM EDT

[#36]

No combat ready unit ever passed inspection, no inspection ready unit ever passed combat.

Try to look inconspicuous the enemy might be low on ammo.

Posted: 4/14/2002 10:15:15 AM EDT

[#37]

The meek shall indeed inherit the Earth. The only question, is, how long can they hold it.

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:02:10 AM EDT

[#38]

In any situation if there is any doubt - then there is no doubt.

If the enemy is in range, then you are too.
If all looks good then you have forgotten something.

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:17:46 AM EDT

[#39]

The only three rules of thumb that I know and live by are the ones my daddy taught me before he left this shitty world.

1. Never invade Russia

2. Don't mix gin with anything but water

3. Don't mess with time travel (or did I say that next week?)

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:32:45 AM EDT

[#40]

If Mamma ain't happy, nobody's happy!

Blessed are those that clean.

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:39:00 AM EDT

[#41]

The light at the end of the tunnel is the oncomming train.

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:40:21 AM EDT

[#42]

Always assume that a five second fuse...ISN'T! So light it and get rid of it NOW!

Assume an enemy weapons and ammo cache is booby trapped. If you want a souvenir, drag it out with a string from a nice safe distance...like a hundred yards from behind a large rock.

When working with power tools, count fingers before and after each cut. If the number changes, stop, take corrective action, and try to locate the missing part.

Loose parts never tighten themselves.

Intermittent problems don't just go away.
They'll come back at the worst possible moment...like just as the plane's wheels leave the ground.

Never get into an argument with an idiot. It makes you an idiot, too.

The sharper the tool, the safer it is.

CJ

Posted: 4/14/2002 11:43:15 AM EDT

[#43]

1)Practice safe sex go F***! yourself!
2)Drive Now Talk Later!.. should be National Law! as some wheel monkies are to dimwitted to know there limits in a tree huggin world.

Posted: 4/14/2002 12:33:30 PM EDT

[#44]

See my sig line.

Posted: 4/14/2002 12:50:15 PM EDT

[#45]

[b]Fat girls give the best head![/b]

[b]Always unload the big gun before heading out to meet the ladies. It keeps the desperate factor lower, and helps keep accidental discharges to minimum.[/b]

I'm married, so I actually don't know anything. That even goes for the things that I used to know. [spank]