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Posted: 4/21/2016 4:15:18 AM EDT
So my fiancée of 3yrs left me two weeks ago because she thought I was fat and awful (I am 20lbs lighter than when we met currently 300lbs 6.2"). The depression has been soul crushing. Combine that with a nonstop masters accounting program that seems determined to do me raw with no lube, and that has been my life lately. I can't go see a therapist because I like owning guns and want to keep it that way, and I just can't pull myself out of this metaphorical pit I have fallen in. I type this after 23 shots of captn jack silver label (started with unopened handle and now I am down to the top of the back label. I used to never drink, I hated the idea of not being in control of my actions and destiny. I have drank more in the last two weeks than in my previous 25yrs 8months and some change on this planet. This is handle #4. I can't stop. I don't know what to do. I feel worthless and a failure. I knew my relationship was headed this way. But I loved this woman. I tried so fucking hard, gave so fucking much. But it wasn't enough. I was always the bad guy. Always the villain. It has eaten away at my sense of self. I don't know how to fix me.
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Stop being a faggot and take control. Your story reads like mine circa 2010.
step 1 drink yourself to sleep step 2 dump the rest of the shit tomorrow, you cant handle it until you get your shit straight step 3 go for a fucking walk tomorrow, even hung over, guys in the mil do it every day, you can to step 4 work your walking to running, now run everyday, 2 miles trying to best your time from the day before step 5 stop eating crap, google keto and paleo keep your diet tight step 6 lift like a motherfucker, google stronglifts 5x5 only you can change your path, I did now I have a great job and woman better than I have ever had before. fuck the bottom, fuck the zero get at it. |
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You type very well for someone who has had 23 shots... So you have that going for you.
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My girl of 8yrs broke up with me, kicked me out of our apartment by text, stole the 2 dogs I bought and raised from puppies, told me she wanted to "work things out" so she could borrow money and I had to show up at my old apartment and bang on the door for 10 minutes to get her out of bed with the new guy to get my money back 2 weeks to the day after the text.
You'll live bud, it's gonna suck for a while but you'll live and you'll realize that you dodged a bullet. You're young, you don't have kids with her and you're education will pay off big time both in money and women. Get hammered and go to sleep. |
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Go get help, there is something messed up about loving guns more than your mental health, and being so paranoid that a professional would be concerned with your gun ownership that you don't seek help.
Drinking won't make anything any better. |
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1) stop drinking...entirely...get help if you really think you need it, just don't mention you have firearms or talk about them.
2) exercise and exercise hard. 3) don't put the pussy on a pedestal. pining over some woman who is either crazy or is not interested in you is just simply a waste of time and not worth the emotional stress. been there, done that...won't ever fucking do that again. |
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Wow- Masters in accounting ? Shit when you finish your degree you'll be set and then the women will be coming to you. Good job and focus on your degree and finish school. Then go get the womenz my friend. You're doing just fine
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callingon the 23 shots... but not on the forever alone 300 lbs
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I was thinking the same thing... Must be practiced. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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You type very well for someone who has had 23 shots... So you have that going for you. I was thinking the same thing... Must be practiced. Yea. Considering I'd probably be dead... |
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23 shots in a sitting is ALOT. Thats is about 23 beers. I say, make you a sandwich or two and watch Reign of Fire.
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That you were able to remember and keep track of 23 shots, well that's just not right.
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One post and he's gone, I'm guessing 23 was an arbitrary number. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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That you were able to remember and keep track of 23 shots, well that's just not right. One post and he's gone, I'm guessing 23 was an arbitrary number. He forgot the dash.....2-3 shots |
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You're only 25 Y/O, you have plenty of time to make life changes & get to where you want to be.
If she was that shallow, then she did you a favor by leaving now instead of dragging it on & possibly putting you in a worse position. Get a gym membership, use the treadmill, or just go walk/jog through your neighborhood whenever you feel like taking a drink. |
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One post and he's gone, I'm guessing 23 was an arbitrary number. View Quote View All Quotes View All Quotes Quoted:
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That you were able to remember and keep track of 23 shots, well that's just not right. One post and he's gone, I'm guessing 23 was an arbitrary number. Maybe not, he is an accountant after all! Seriously OP, go out side Yeah, what happened to you stings. Go outside. There's a big world out there and it will help put your problems into perspective. Follow the regimen the first or second post advocated. Start. Now. My wife and I had irreconcilable differences. I was ready to leave and file for divorce when she turned up pregnant about 6 years in due to a foul up by her doctor that reduced the efficiency of the pill by about 80%. Two kids in approximately a year, and I felt trapped in a loveless marriage. I stayed for the kids, but threw myself a 25 year pity party. What a frakin' waste. What an utter, total, and complete waste of a huge chunk of my life. Don't do that. Just don't. Get off yer backside and go out side. |
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Quoted: Stop being a faggot and take control. Your story reads like mine circa 2010. step 1 drink yourself to sleep step 2 dump the rest of the shit tomorrow, you cant handle it until you get your shit straight step 3 go for a fucking walk tomorrow, even hung over, guys in the mil do it every day, you can to step 4 work your walking to running, now run everyday, 2 miles trying to best your time from the day before step 5 stop eating crap, google keto and paleo keep your diet tight step 6 lift like a motherfucker, google stronglifts 5x5 only you can change your path, I did now I have a great job and woman better than I have ever had before. fuck the bottom, fuck the zero get at it. View Quote |
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You are 25. Too young to think that you will
1 never find a woman again 2 stay 280 pounds. Posted Via AR15.Com Mobile |
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OP ... you deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you just as badly. You won't be able to see the truth in this for a while, but she did you a favor.
Put the bottle away - focus on your studies - the pain will fade. ETA: While you wait for the future Mrs. WatermellonAssassin to cross you path, you should get down to under 200 lbs dude. |
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First quite drinking. That shit fucks with your head even after your sober.
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That you were able to remember and keep track of 23 shots, well that's just not right. One post and he's gone, I'm guessing 23 was an arbitrary number. He forgot the dash.....2-3 shots WTF is "Captain Jack?" Does he mean Calico Jack, or Captain Morgan? C'mon OP. Exactly how many milliliters have you had? |
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Too true Ain't 23 shots. A whole 750ml bottle is about 25 oz. Focus on school, get your ass in shape and the wimmenz will come. Better wimmenz too. |
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Break that OP into separate verses, add a few lines about your dog and your truck, then come up with a decent chorus, and you'll have yourself one heck of a country song.
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FPNI especially the part about stopping being a faggot. So your broad ladder climbed so what? If you expected anything less you are fooling yourself. Stop fooling yourself, there is no white unicorn.
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This is going to sound crazy to you OP.
This is the worst of the worst in your life right now, but as I sit here and read it, I'm saying to you that her leaving is the best thing to ever happen to you. ...trust me |
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Go see a therapist, the only way you'll be at risk of losing your guns is if you tell them you're thinking of hurting yourself or someone else. This is Georgia, not New York. My ex was sent in for a 72 hour evaluation after something she said scared one of her friends (but was released that night as soon as she talked to a doctor), she's had no problems getting her carry permit or buying guns. Heck, I saw a therapist during my divorce, was even diagnosed with mild PTSD, no issues.
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Quoted:
Stop being a faggot and take control. Your story reads like mine circa 2010. step 1 drink yourself to sleep step 2 dump the rest of the shit tomorrow, you cant handle it until you get your shit straight step 3 go for a fucking walk tomorrow, even hung over, guys in the mil do it every day, you can to step 4 work your walking to running, now run everyday, 2 miles trying to best your time from the day before step 5 stop eating crap, google keto and paleo keep your diet tight step 6 lift like a motherfucker, google stronglifts 5x5 only you can change your path, I did now I have a great job and woman better than I have ever had before. fuck the bottom, fuck the zero get at it. View Quote THIS ^^^. YOU define who you are and your own value of self-worth. Don't let a woman (or anyone else, for that matter) define that for you. If you do, you'll always be miserable. So go sleep it off, pour out that shit tomorrow, and then get busy proving to yourself that you're better than this. |
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Get the fuck off my obstical ,fatbody.you climb walls like old people fuck!!!!!
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Get the masters, get to work. In 5 years you'll make a ton of money.
Get outside and do something that gets your heart pumping. Nothing makes you feel better like a little good physical exercise and excitement. Drain the bottle if you can't control that shit. Alcohol will fuck up your life. Your ex will be begging to suck your dick in 5 years when you're feeling like a superstar. My wife is in finance for the computer industry. She started as an accountant. That shit is boring as hell to me, but I'll be damned if she hasn't made a ton of money and pulled down a ton of stock options. Good luck. |
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Meh your fiance is fat and awful.
Fuck that nasty bitch. Get fit and relax. Life will be great if you try to see things differently. You HAVE to try and make an effort. Getting better won't happen automatically. |
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You are aware of course, that alcohol is a depressant. (aren't you?)
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after you graduate take a few doses of fukitall and pick up somewhere new.
wish I had I'm stuck in a shitty situation but trying to remain optimistic. If it don't change soon I'm gonna pack up and go far far away and start over. consider Alaska that's where ill go. |
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Minus being overweight, this sounds like a typical Tuesday for me.
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First thing to do is put down the bottle. Second is talk to a buddy. I saw a counselor after my divorce and it helped immensely. IM me if you want to talk.
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Just an update. It was captn Morgan. I was blitzed. Had two more shots and puked all over my living room floor. That's why no update. A little hungover but better today. I made an appointment a few hours ago for counseling. And the people saying get in shape, I am. I go to the gym 5 days a week. 1hr on the elliptical at roughly a 9:10/mile pace followed by a shit ton of weights following a program a trainer made for me. I have lost the bulk of the 20lbs recently, about 2-3lbs a week. I am also eating clean, organic, and paleo already. You may be right, this could be the best thing to happen to me. It just doesn't feel like it now. And as for school, I could flunk my finals and pass. I have a 4.0 and want to keep it that way. The majority of my school stress is my own manufacture due to those high standards I have for where I want my grades to be.
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Toughen up, seriously sometimes life is hard but show it you're harder.
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Quoted:
This is going to sound crazy to you OP. This is the worst of the worst in your life right now, but as I sit here and read it, I'm saying to you that her leaving is the best thing to ever happen to you. ...trust me View Quote Its certainly the best thing that ever happened to her. |
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Just an update. It was captn Morgan. I was blitzed. Had two more shots and puked all over my living room floor. That's why no update. A little hungover but better today. I made an appointment a few hours ago for counseling. And the people saying get in shape, I am. I go to the gym 5 days a week. 1hr on the elliptical at roughly a 9:10/mile pace followed by a shit ton of weights following a program a trainer made for me. I have lost the bulk of the 20lbs recently, about 2-3lbs a week. I am also eating clean, organic, and paleo already. You may be right, this could be the best thing to happen to me. It just doesn't feel like it now. And as for school, I could flunk my finals and pass. I have a 4.0 and want to keep it that way. The majority of my school stress is my own manufacture due to those high standards I have for where I want my grades to be. View Quote Glad your feeling better. You're doing everything right bro, just keep at it. And screw that fucking cunt. Go bang some whores, and have fun. Relationships aren't worth destroying your self esteem over. |
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Grow up dude, its pussy and as you trim your large ass down more and better pussy will come your way.
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you're in a master's program. this means that you are choosing the ass-reaming. you could quit right now this minute, if the going is rough enough. but you haven't quit--you're not taking the easy path. you're still in there fighting it out.
strength is not a capacity--it is the doing of difficult things. you're doing a difficult thing. as much as it sucks, take pride in that. |
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Quoted:
Just an update. It was captn Morgan. I was blitzed. Had two more shots and puked all over my living room floor. That's why no update. A little hungover but better today. I made an appointment a few hours ago for counseling. And the people saying get in shape, I am. I go to the gym 5 days a week. 1hr on the elliptical at roughly a 9:10/mile pace followed by a shit ton of weights following a program a trainer made for me. I have lost the bulk of the 20lbs recently, about 2-3lbs a week. I am also eating clean, organic, and paleo already. You may be right, this could be the best thing to happen to me. It just doesn't feel like it now. And as for school, I could flunk my finals and pass. I have a 4.0 and want to keep it that way. The majority of my school stress is my own manufacture due to those high standards I have for where I want my grades to be. View Quote Keep it up. Oh, and since the witch is gone, wake up everyday and tell yourself "I'm free." You're much better off now that she's gone, from the sounds of it. Think about the feelings you had last night all depressed and shit, and tack on the feeling of being trapped. That's what your life would look like in a couple of years had she not left. This is a wakeup call. A good one, at that. Keep being awesome, don't worry about bitchy pussy, and everything else will fall into place. I wish you all the best. |
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