User Panel
Posted: 8/24/2001 12:59:47 PM EDT
that you can not have to many guns? And dont forgrt the ammo also. She is not anti and she likes to shoot.
I am sure someone out there has an answer. |
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Problem is I can give her $100 and tell her to buy something for herself and she will put it in the bank.
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The only way is to buy her STUFF! Lots of it. Frequently. Take her on at least four mini-vacations a year and voice to her daily your belief that she is the supermodel of your dreams. I didn't say it way easy. Planerench out.
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My wife likes jewelry and shoes. When she buys new jewelry I get to buy a new gun.
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Just let her know the truth.If you dont get them now,you may never be able to get em!The truth is a powerful thing,isn't it?
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Ask her if she can have too many shoes, or too many diamond rings.
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We each have a budget set aside for our hobbies and every month we put a portion of our income into it. Sometimes she uses her portion to buy me guns and gun accessories for birthday or something. Last month she got me a shotgun, shells and rifle case for my B-day. My 2001 LEGP was a early B-day gift from my wife too. This summer I used some of mine to get her a new kick-ass computer for her graduation present. Works both ways.
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I don't have to convince my wife, she knows what I like and enjoys seeing me happy. It goes both ways.
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Back when I had a wife I would just explain to her that I had come across a good deal and that I needed to pick it up. She would eventually give in. However I am now buying all the guns and fast cars that I can before I remarry so she will atleast be able to see it coming.
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She doesn't shop for herself.
She doesn't have many shoes or wants them. She doesn't like jewelry. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. |
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I just tell her its my passion. She also was a witness to a murder last year. Man got shot 6 time point blank with a 9mm, right in front of my wife. She feels safer now knowing she can find a gun in any room at any time. The murder was a wake up call for her.
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Quoted: She doesn't shop for herself. She doesn't have many shoes or wants them. She doesn't like jewelry. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. View Quote Can I have her??? [:P] |
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I buy her a gun and she feels guilty about it so she says okay when I talk about getting myself one.
She has 2 pistols, 2 shotguns and 3 22 LR rifles. After she got each one I got to buy another. She has only been shooting for 1 1/2 years. I'll need another safe soon. |
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Quoted: She doesn't shop for herself. She doesn't have many shoes or wants them. She doesn't like jewelry. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. View Quote Then go out of your way to make time for HER. If that means taking her shooting then so be it. Plus you might look into getting a .22lr for her to shoot. And load mags for her also. The small things that you do for and with her will help. Help around the house more than usual and make small comments like how much you enjoy it. Make sure that she gets something before you. She will be more inclined towards being ok with it. Always be honest with her about your purchases. If she finds out you bought something without her input(behind her back), she will lose Trust in you.(What else is He hiding from me?) And will be less likely to go along with Future purchases. I took a day off from work and took my wife shooting. She shot my Accurized 10\22 and I loaded mags. She had a Blast and I tried to coach and encourage her. (Way to go honey, That Bullseye is dead) She was soo happy she kept her targets to show the kids how good she did. Good luck Del[:)] |
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I just got from my paychecks and other thing's $2895.95 my wife had to go in this hole ordeal a few days ago about how she wanted me to start placing $1000 a month for bills and food and other stuff.
Now she tells me after I get this money that I should be placing more in to the the bills and stuff and she told me that the $1000 thing was going to start next month. WOW now that she knows that the job I have right now is only going to pay me $6.50 an hour.This just sucks but I'm going to get my new gun like it or not |
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[img]http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/monkes.gif[/img]
[i][b]"If you're not telling, she's not knowing"[/i][/b][}:D] sgb[O:)] |
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Delmarksman is right on. It also helps to let her out shoot you once in a while. But I'm sure we all have a few toys that our Lovely Wives don't know about. At least mine aren't named Monica or Chandra!!
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Tell her that the guns are better investments than just about anything else; they are for the kid's college education.
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Quoted: She doesn't shop for herself. She doesn't have many shoes or wants them. She doesn't like jewelry. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. View Quote Your wife sounds a lot like me, so here's my advice. As long as you can afford to buy the guns and ammo without going hungry or losing the homestead, do it. She married you because she loves you. Whatever makes you happy will make her happy. Don't feel guilty about it, and don't hide it from her. Take her to the range with you and let her try them all out. She'll soon have a favorite and from there you can shop for bigger and better together. Share your passion with the woman you love. (...and helping around the house won't hurt, either [;)]) Good luck! |
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Mine is a peach. She always understood that I had my guns before I had her. Never was there a problem. Just lucky I guess!!
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When we were still going together and talking about marriage. I told her that she would go before the guns. Worked well until we hit some hard times. All my favorite old time guns went away,the bills got paid and my wife is still here. New guns are coming into the house on a regular basis now, with the biggest problem being wether or not the new gun will fit her.
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If purchasing, or selling any of my possessions, not just my guns, would satisfy a need in my family I would certainly do it. Except for a couple of guns for self-defense and hunting, the rest are just toys. If you can afford toys, buy them. Firearms do tend to appreciate in value, but only if you sell them in the future.
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As long as the bills are getting paid and your putting a little aside for the future, kids college fund, etc. she shouldn't have a problem. But if all your doing is blowing your paycheck on guns and ammo and bill collectors are calling your house all the time, she should be bitchin at your irresponsible as*.
You could always try this line. Alright honey, you buy the next gun! Let me know if this works on a woman. |
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I avoided the whole problem - I'm ex-ABN and my wife is ex-PD, s we both have more or less the same outlook toward these things. Now, if I can just get her to quit squawking about the tool budget I want...
FFZ |
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Quoted: I'm not married, but I would think that your wife, being that she married you and accepts your interests and loves you unconditionally, that you would not have to convince her that you wish to buy more guns and ammo. View Quote I appreciate your honesty. BTW, It's soooooo obvious that you're not married!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [:D] |
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Quoted: Quoted: She doesn't shop for herself. She doesn't have many shoes or wants them. She doesn't like jewelry. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. View Quote Your wife sounds a lot like me, so here's my advice. As long as you can afford to buy the guns and ammo without going hungry or losing the homestead, do it. She married you because she loves you. Whatever makes you happy will make her happy. Don't feel guilty about it, and don't hide it from her. Take her to the range with you and let her try them all out. She'll soon have a favorite and from there you can shop for bigger and better together. Share your passion with the woman you love. (...and helping around the house won't hurt, either [;)]) Good luck! View Quote Well you sound just like my wife. [;)] And YES, Going out of your way to help around the house ALWAYS helps!!! Bringing her along Also goes a long way. Make time for her enjoyment and the rest will follow. A happy wife is a good wife. Del [:)] |
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So let me get this straight...
1. You give your wife money and she puts it in the bank. 2. She doesn't shop for herself. 3. She doesn't have many shoes or want them. 4. She doesn't like jewelry. 5. She doesn't complain but I feel guilty. [b]..and you're asking [i]us[/i] for advise?[>:/][>:/][>:/]?[/b] You got it backwards buddy, you should be running a freaking marriage counsler service for us!! sgtar15 PS Delmarksman does have some very valid points also. |
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I employ two different tactics.
1) Mine likes to shoot and does so quite well. She does not shoot everything that I have (+ for me) but I take her shooting as often as she will allow. This keeps her understanding (very very good) and interest up in my [b]"needs[/b] and keeps her used to how I am (not that I'd let her forget BAM) 2) She does not have an accurate clue as to just exactly the amount of firearms or ammunition in my safe. This allows me the occasional covert operation which I undertake with little or no conscience. I do not expect her to fully comprehend my take on the firearms world nor do I expect her to subscribe to the particular views I have on our political climate and what I feel to be an all out conspiracy. Because she is not adept at digesting this type of information, it is my duty to see to it that we are prepared. In my mind being prepared properly is not dependent upon her acceptance of a particular purchase. I leave the household purchases, decorative issues, food and hygenic purchases, childrens clothing, investments and her clothing and make-up to her. Mechanical, maintenance and weaponry are my specialties. |
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Quoted: Problem is I can give her $100 and tell her to buy something for herself and she will put it in the bank. View Quote Breugel, I know the feeling. I can't get my wife to spend money if I wanted to. Couple years ago, she wanted to get dressed up and go somewhere nice for her birthday. So I spent about $300 on a suit (didn't have one, so I could have used one anyway and I also needed to wear one to the Jeopardy tryout). She bought a new dress and a new pair of shoes, $40 total. She paid for her wedding ring (no I didn't make her, she wanted to) and only spent $100. She doesn't buy jewlery or fancy clothing/shoes. She might spend $20-30/month on some books or other misc items. Guess I should quit complaining and go buy some more ammo. [:)] |
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Quoted: Breugel, I know the feeling. I can't get my wife to spend money if I wanted to. Couple years ago, she wanted to get dressed up and go somewhere nice for her birthday. So I spent about $300 on a suit (didn't have one, so I could have used one anyway and I also needed to wear one to the Jeopardy tryout). She bought a new dress and a new pair of shoes, $40 total. She paid for her wedding ring (no I didn't make her, she wanted to) and only spent $100. She doesn't buy jewlery or fancy clothing/shoes. She might spend $20-30/month on some books or other misc items. Guess I should quit complaining and go buy some more ammo. [:)] View Quote OK, this is not my wife. We constantly get packages in the mail, she loves jewelry, loves to shop, and bought herself a german sports car. But, she is the real bread winner of the house and pays way more than her fair share of the bills so I support her in buying things that will make her happy and can't complain. Of course I live paycheck to paycheck and will be lucky to get a C&R rifle this year (went on a pistol spending spree and wife bought me a big safe this year). Now I'm waiting for one of those Yugo SKSs that are supposed to be coming around soon. I gotta win this lotto thing or get a real job. [rolleyes] bruegel, you sound like a lucky man. A card and flowers once a month are worth more than their weight in gold. With women, it really is the thought that counts. [:)] |
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I know I'm going to get flamed for this, but I'm going to post it anyway. Breugel, if you're feeling guilty, then you probably ARE spending and HAVE spent too much. Maybe, you need to review your collection to see what you can sell. In other words, get rid of the duplicates or the ones you don't shoot. Also, be more careful with what you buy in the future. As I've heard a friend that's a (successful) marriage counselor say, if one partner feels guilty then there IS a reason for it, and it needs to be fixed before it becomes a larger problem. You might feel like you can ignore the guilt and do a few little things for her to get over it, but you might be underestimating the power of guilt. After all (I mean no disrespect by this remark), the Roman Catholic church figured-out long ago that guilt is a better motivator than love, force, or (to a lesser extent) the promise of heaven. If it's a strong enough force to make many of us get out of bed early on a Sunday morning and dress in uncomfortable clothes, then it's a pretty strong emotional force. Don't look at it as not being able to have certain new toys, but as a chance to be more selective in what you do buy. I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you were concerned enough to ask for help here, then there is a problem and you need to find it and fix it.
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