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AR15.COM
11/27/2004 5:58:07 PM EDT
was extremely pleasent. I hate to admit this, especially here, but I have kind of avoided going to a VFW because on other occasions outside of this sort of place (such as the VA hospital) I have had my ear talked off by people either claiming to be veterans or actual veterans that find they need to embellish/exaggerate their service experiences.

I'm not one to really spill my beans about my .mil experiences to any stranger that is sitting at a bar... and I've always picture a VFW to be a haven for people that do. I imagined a scenario something like; walking through the door, pulling up a stool and looking around at the patrons as I order a beer to see that I am not only the youngest guy in the place but that they are all getting ants in their pants to come over to me and start telling me their life stories.

Well, as fate would have it I accepted an inviation from my uncle and his wife for my family to join them for Thanksgiving dinner at their home. I've never been super-close to my uncle, partly because he's never been much of a talker. Over the last few years he's opened up to me here and there. His (second) wife (who was his girlfriend at the time I got married... she caught my wife's bouquet) seems to really like us and has been accepted into the family pretty well. Well, while we hung out with them we found out that they frequent the local VFW (Armistace Post 1616 in Williamstown, NJ). I knew my uncle was a Vietnam vet but that's all I knew. I didn't know he made any connections between his prior service and his current life. I always figured because he never talked about it that he just wanted to forget that part of his life and more or less pretend it never happened. But I thought it was interesting that he was a member.

The following night he wanted to take my wife and I there for some beers. So we went and hung out for about 5+ hours. Met a few of his friends all of whom were very nice people, played pool and darts with my uncle while my wife talked with one of the Women's Auxilliary members and just had a good time. Contrary to what made me apprehensive about going, nobody really pushed their service records on us, even after they found out we were OEF/OIF veterans (respectively). What a relief.

Anywho, thought I would share this and say that I'm glad I went and we look forward to the next trip to NJ to go again.




ETA: The bartender/post commander was determined to make my wife and I members. We'll probably take him up on the deal next time we are there.
11/27/2004 6:44:10 PM EDT
[#1]
We had a retirement at the VFW outside our base.  It is a hang out for old drunks for the most part. Three bleary eyed guys hanging on the bar, one recounting his decision to go get drunk instead of mowing the yard.  My dad was a post president in our hometown and that one was a nice place for shooting pool, beer and cards.  This one was a disappointment to say the least.

I never considered myself eligible for membership since nobody ever shoots at me when I am overseas, but I do hit the occasional war zone.  I have three short tour ribbons and will get a fourth before the fun ends.

I'd be interested in hearing from some guys who had a more positive experience in a VFW hall than I had on my only visit since adulthood.    

11/27/2004 6:51:24 PM EDT
[#2]
There were definitely some "regulars" in this VFW/bar... but they were all very cool people.
11/28/2004 4:30:40 AM EDT
[#3]
I keep getting letters from them to join. I haven't yet.
11/28/2004 4:48:58 AM EDT
[#4]
I was turned down for membership when I returned from Vietnam.  They wouldn't accept Vietnam vets unless they were officers or senior NCO's.  I still remember what the guy at the VFW hall told me:  "We don't want your kind!"
11/28/2004 2:53:56 PM EDT
[#5]

Quoted:
I was turned down for membership when I returned from Vietnam.  They wouldn't accept Vietnam vets unless they were officers or senior NCO's.  I still remember what the guy at the VFW hall told me:  "We don't want your kind!"



I doubt this reflects the attitude of most VFW posts today. That is pretty appalling though... bad enough to have civilians spitting on Vietnam vets, but to have fellow veterans slamming doors in the faces of other vets is truly fucked. Like I said though, odds are you won't find one like that today. This is one of those times I'd go off my beaten path and say don't hold a grudge...
11/28/2004 4:44:55 PM EDT
[#6]

Quoted:
I was turned down for membership when I returned from Vietnam.  They wouldn't accept Vietnam vets unless they were officers or senior NCO's.  I still remember what the guy at the VFW hall told me:  "We don't want your kind!"



Pretty sad when you consider that the average grunt in Vietnam saw more combat than most WWII grunts.
11/28/2004 7:01:05 PM EDT
[#7]
When I came home from Iraq (well, home from CA, I had been back in country for a month), I didn't tell anyone I was coming. My mother thought I was still in Iraq when I showed up on the doorstep (on July 4th no less) in my Dress Blues.

My step-father never served, but most of his friends did, and within an hour of my arrival he had dragged me off to the local VFW post (still in uniform). I have never been so shitfaced drunk in my life. I never spent a dime, and neither did my step father. 'bout every 6 or 7 minutes a fresh beer would be placed in front of me.

Was never pressed about what I did, just a lot of thank yous and welcome homes accompanied with enough slaps on my back to have sever of my vertebre permanantly afixed to the backside of my sternum.  When I sobered up the next day, the neighbor across the street (also a VFW member -- and present at what could only be described as a reverse wet down) brought me a membership application, shoved cash into my hand, asked me to hand it back, and when I did, he handed me a membership card.

11/28/2004 7:04:41 PM EDT
[#8]

Quoted:
I was turned down for membership when I returned from Vietnam.  They wouldn't accept Vietnam vets unless they were officers or senior NCO's.  I still remember what the guy at the VFW hall told me:  "We don't want your kind!"




It was the same attitude when I came home from Beirut.     I dont need them
11/28/2004 8:58:50 PM EDT
[#9]
My experience dealing with veterans orgs has been that in every community you will find two kinds. One bunch is a bunch of cliquish drunks who just want a private club, the other is a bunch who are into community service and will have a friendly enviornment for amyone who served. And from one town to another it varies who is who..in some places the Legion is the good bunch and the VFW drunk assholes, in the next town the opposite.
11/28/2004 9:07:51 PM EDT
[#10]
I belong to both the VFW and the American Legion. I have never met any private club drunks. I've met an asshole or three, but none of the attitude described here.

The VFW fought for me when I filed my disability claim with the VA. The VA had jerked me around and "lost" my claim twice. Within 2 months of contacting the VFW, my claim was approved and backdated to the date of my discharge. The firs VA payment covered the previous 13 months, and was over $5k.

I can't say enough good things about the VFW or the AL, they are as they claim, vets serving vets....who happen to run bars all over the country.  

When I was on active duty, I used to stop by the local VFW hall, and was always welcomed with open arms and never paid for any beer. Now it's my turn to buy the beer for the young guys. I'm proud to be a member.
11/30/2004 5:03:22 AM EDT
[#11]
Dont you have to find a member to vouch for you to become a member and have been awarded an expeditianary medal to join? I imagine I cant just walk in and order up a beer.
11/30/2004 5:13:50 AM EDT
[#12]
Glad to see hear of your positive experience at the local VFW.

As noted, most Posts are very Community Service oriented. However, just like any group of people, there will be a few asshats. But most important to understand, we are all brothers (and sisters).

My Post gladly welcomes all guests. If you're not a member of the VFW you will need to have a member sign you in to the Canteen. Here in Texas, this is a T(exas) A(lcoholic) B(everage) C(ommission) requirement as we are a private club. I would imagine it's similar in all states.


Proud Commander of the Casey Joyce All-America Post #4380 in Plano, TX.
11/30/2004 5:22:16 AM EDT
[#13]

Quoted:
Dont you have to find a member to vouch for you to become a member and have been awarded an expeditianary medal to join? I imagine I cant just walk in and order up a beer.



I was wondering that myself. The commander was asking my wife to join up right there... I was wondering if they need some sort of documented proof that you were actually in the .mil and have served in a conflict overseas. Otherwise any goofball off the street could walk in and claim service to get cheap beer.
11/30/2004 5:44:58 AM EDT
[#14]
DD214 showing when you were in and where/what you did is sufficient.

When I went in, I was wearing a CAR w/ 1 star, and a Armed Forces Expeitionary Medal. I was never asked for my DD214.
11/30/2004 6:02:04 AM EDT
[#15]
To join the VFW, you had to serve overseas in a combat theater. Proof can be a DD214, an LES with combat pay or the order awarding the specific campaign ribbon or combat medal.

Eligibility to join the Mens or Ladies Auxiliary requires you be directly related by blood or marriage to someone eligible to join the VFW. See above for proof of eligibility.



Join the VFW

As yesterday's defenders of freedom we want to welcome today's military service members into our ranks to become part of our elite group. Our common bond is the battlefield, whether it is service in the Persian Gulf, Korea, Kosovo, the war on terrorism or peace-keeping expeditionary campaigns. Your courage and sacrifice has made a difference in preserving and defending world peace. Become part of the VFW family today so you can make a difference in your community tomorrow.





Active Duty MIP

Are you active-duty, in the Reserves or in the National Guard?

Have you been to Bosnia, Somalia, Haiti or Rwanda?

Have you participated in Operation Southern or Northern Watch?

Have you completed a tour in Korea?

Are you deployed in Afganistan or Iraq?

If so, we want you in our ranks.

(Use our eligibility listing, which lists campaign periods and authorized service medals, to determine eligibility for membership.)

Enjoy our active-duty membership special through the VFW's Military Initiative Program (MIP). We are offering free introductory memberships-at-large for first-time members.



Note in the eligibility listing the "Korea Duty" - Service on the Korean Peninsula or it's territorial water for 30 consecutive or 60 non-consectutive days. This has been in effect since 1949 and is still open for eligibility.
11/30/2004 6:11:09 AM EDT
[#16]

Quoted:

Quoted:
Dont you have to find a member to vouch for you to become a member and have been awarded an expeditianary medal to join? I imagine I cant just walk in and order up a beer.



I was wondering that myself. The commander was asking my wife to join up right there... I was wondering if they need some sort of documented proof that you were actually in the .mil and have served in a conflict overseas. Otherwise any goofball off the street could walk in and claim service to get cheap beer.



Some Posts are more lenient than other regarding proof. To be an officer in the VFW requires proof of eligibility and it's an annually audited item. Otherwise, the burden of eligibility has to do with the non-profit status of the Post as seen by the IRS. If they audit the Post and the Post can't prove that 90% of their members are eligible veterans then the Post would lose their non-profit status.

And at our Post the beer ain't so cheap.