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Posted: 8/12/2010 8:35:13 PM EDT
We are talking first glance here. Do you ladies look at a man's shoes critically? That is, is if the shoes are worn, not polished (dress shoes, obviously) and the heels worn down - is it a turnoff? Do you notice shoes at all?

For full disclosure, I'm in medical sales. I've always tried to keep my dress shoes in good shape. Polished, resoled, re-heeled, etc. I was just wondering if it pays off. I'm also trying to stress to my son that such stuff pays off i.e. women notice the details. Or is it a generational thing? Do older women notice bad shoes more than younger women?

Inquiring minds want to know.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:15:18 AM EDT
I don't look at shoes unless they're like totally crazy... Yeah, shoes aren't even on the first 5 list.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:47:42 AM EDT
I think it depends on the female and what type your going for. I don't look at shoes but it is nice to see a guy all cleaned up!
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 10:57:54 AM EDT
I was JUST talking about this last night. I definately don't have some weird shoe fetish but I totally check out shoes. If a guy is wearing birks or crocs, I run- if he is wearing sexy boots he is perfect. Like said above it depends on what the girl thinks is hot but a guy in broke down shoes is not as appealing as a man who spends a little extra on his kicks...I'm just sayin.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 2:22:25 PM EDT
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 5:30:35 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/13/2010 5:31:55 PM EDT by zomgpenguins]
No, I don't care about the shoes. It's not something I notice/care about until after I really get to know the guy.. and even then, it would probably just be a comment to poke fun at him or something. I don't care about fancy shoes or beat up sneakers. If I really think about it, I like my guys in flip flops. I'll probably pay more attention now...
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:08:05 PM EDT
never notice the shoes, i am looking at his face not his feet.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:19:10 PM EDT
143 reads and only six replies? I guess (for the most part)
women really don't care. Interesting.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:26:33 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Willmar:
143 reads and only six replies? I guess (for the most part)
women really don't care. Interesting.


Six women say your thread. The rest of th views were men wondering what they thought.

I was one of them
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:31:05 PM EDT
If he is dressed up, yes, I look at the shoes. It does say something about him. But jeans and a T-shirt look great on a man too. However, self confidence and a brain is much more important. Similar political views are a huge plus, too. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't date a man who supports gun control and most of what the current administration is trying to accomplish.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:36:31 PM EDT

Originally Posted By XCRmonger:
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.

This. To me, a man that wears fancy shoes (think Italian or those boxy long toed shoes) are materialistic.

But, since you are in sales, nice shoes are a must. They must match the clothing you are wearing and suit the position you are in. You can't afford to walk around in ratty shoes. It just looks unprofessional.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 8:43:05 PM EDT
Its interesting to read the replies. I never thought my shoes were looked at in that way. I work for a Fire Dept so I beat my boots up pretty good. I just figured my boots are meant for me to walk in, not for women to judge me by.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:22:45 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Rickety_Rescue:
Its interesting to read the replies. I never thought my shoes were looked at in that way. I work for a Fire Dept so I beat my boots up pretty good. I just figured my boots are meant for me to walk in, not for women to judge me by.


You are overthinking it. Women are smart enough to know that if you are a fireman, your work boots will reflect your line of work. If your work boots (or whatever you wear) are polished and shiny it would probably suggest that you are riding a desk and not putting yourself in harms way. That being said, at the end of your shift and you put on a pair of dressy shoes and THOSE shoes were in disrepair would be closer to my original question.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:34:20 PM EDT
Originally Posted By XCRmonger:
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.


Okay, maybe I should have qualified this question a little better. I wasn't talking about work boots. Those reflect the job. Try it this way, if the rancher, manual laborer or whatever is taking you out on a special date, would you notice if the shoes he wore were clean and in good repair or would it not matter?
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:37:43 PM EDT
I don't notice shoes. I'm too busy looking at their ass face...
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:43:21 PM EDT
I've asked before. Some do, some don't.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:43:26 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Compass:

Originally Posted By XCRmonger:
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.

This. To me, a man that wears fancy shoes (think Italian or those boxy long toed shoes) are materialistic.

But, since you are in sales, nice shoes are a must. They must match the clothing you are wearing and suit the position you are in. You can't afford to walk around in ratty shoes. It just looks unprofessional.


This was more along the lines of what I was expecting. However, I am beginning to wonder, with the responses, if I've gone too far regarding women and shoes in a professional setting (or, for that matter, say an evening out).

Having grown up in the South, I really don't like trendy shoes. I err on the traditional side. My younger co-workers (in their 20's) don't have such qualms. Which leads me back to thinking it may be a generational thing.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:45:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Combat_Jack:
I've asked before. Some do, some don't.


Probably the obvious answer.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 9:47:54 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Willmar:
Originally Posted By Compass:

Originally Posted By XCRmonger:
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.

This. To me, a man that wears fancy shoes (think Italian or those boxy long toed shoes) are materialistic.

But, since you are in sales, nice shoes are a must. They must match the clothing you are wearing and suit the position you are in. You can't afford to walk around in ratty shoes. It just looks unprofessional.


This was more along the lines of what I was expecting. However, I am beginning to wonder, with the responses, if I've gone too far regarding women and shoes in a professional setting (or, for that matter, say an evening out).

Having grown up in the South, I really don't like trendy shoes. I err on the traditional side. My younger co-workers (in their 20's) don't have such qualms. Which leads me back to thinking it may be a generational thing.

I am in my 20s and I run from guys that wear trendy shoes. But I am more traditional in my thinking process. I don't follow fashion.
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 10:04:39 PM EDT
Dammit, Compass! You are throwing off my numbers by being in your 20's and thinking that way!

Either you need to not care about shoes or add 10-15 years to your age!

In all seriousness, you seem to be bucking the trend. Not a bad thing in my opinion but what do I know?
Link Posted: 8/13/2010 10:53:27 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Willmar:
Dammit, Compass! You are throwing off my numbers by being in your 20's and thinking that way!

Either you need to not care about shoes or add 10-15 years to your age!

In all seriousness, you seem to be bucking the trend. Not a bad thing in my opinion but what do I know?

Sorry.


I was raised in a more traditional setting, so I feel weird around people my age. I tend to socialize with older folks. I feel more comfy around mature people.

I just wish other people my age were like this.
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 10:44:11 AM EDT
Originally Posted By Compass:

Originally Posted By Willmar:
Dammit, Compass! You are throwing off my numbers by being in your 20's and thinking that way!

Either you need to not care about shoes or add 10-15 years to your age!

In all seriousness, you seem to be bucking the trend. Not a bad thing in my opinion but what do I know?

Sorry.


I was raised in a more traditional setting, so I feel weird around people my age. I tend to socialize with older folks. I feel more comfy around mature people.

I just wish other people my age were like this.


I'm in my 20's too and I have to say "I agree with you Compass"

* Willmar - I didn't marry my husband because of what I thought about his shoes.
When shoes crossed my mind it was to get them OFF and him in BED

If a man has moar shoes then me - then I'll be questioning the guy.

Link Posted: 8/14/2010 1:23:38 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Willmar:
Originally Posted By XCRmonger:
To a degree. If they're fancy and obviously expensive, I find myself turned off a little. I look for work shoes. Shoes that are worn and have seen labor. There is nothing sexier than a hard workin' man. Rancher, manual laborer, construction worker... I am a big fan. If they drive a big muddy truck... even better.


Okay, maybe I should have qualified this question a little better. I wasn't talking about work boots. Those reflect the job. Try it this way, if the rancher, manual laborer or whatever is taking you out on a special date, would you notice if the shoes he wore were clean and in good repair or would it not matter?


Even then I would prefer something simple and affordable. I would never dream of paying more than $40 for a pair of shoes. Most I ever paid for a pair of shoes was $35, and I wanted them REALLY bad. I think spending a ton of money on shoes or clothes is kind of a waste. There are better things to invest in. You can look nice without blowing your life savings. Practicality turns me on.

Link Posted: 8/14/2010 1:29:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Compass:

Originally Posted By Willmar:
Dammit, Compass! You are throwing off my numbers by being in your 20's and thinking that way!

Either you need to not care about shoes or add 10-15 years to your age!

In all seriousness, you seem to be bucking the trend. Not a bad thing in my opinion but what do I know?

Sorry.


I was raised in a more traditional setting, so I feel weird around people my age. I tend to socialize with older folks. I feel more comfy around mature people.

I just wish other people my age were like this.




28 here, and while you might not call me traditional, i've been referred to as an old style southern gentleman more than a few times.

i wear boots every day, and if it's a special occasion i wipe them off on the way out of the house
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 1:33:13 PM EDT
If I ever met a girl that judged me by the type/style/color of shoes I had on......I would assume that she was very high maintenance, shallow, and a gold digger.... and walk away.....

A man is much more than his shoes....
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 2:41:36 PM EDT
Originally Posted By imq707s:
If I ever met a girl that judged me by the type/style/color of shoes I had on......I would assume that she was very high maintenance, shallow, and a gold digger.... and walk away.....

A man is much more than his shoes....


Again, missing the point. I wasn't referring to the style of shoes so much as how the guy keeps up with them. Granted, if all you can afford are shoes from Wally World and the women turns up her nose, then yes, I concede your point about her being shallow.
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 4:40:41 PM EDT
For the men reading this thread, just google "does a woman judge a man by his shoes" and see how many hits come up.

I'll throw something else into the mix: FOR THE WOMEN (not the male lurkers), do you notice a man's fingernails? And, no, I'm not talking professional manicures here. Just whether or not a guy keeps the nails trimmed?
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 7:32:12 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Willmar:
For the men reading this thread, just google "does a woman judge a man by his shoes" and see how many hits come up.

I'll throw something else into the mix: FOR THE WOMEN (not the male lurkers), do you notice a man's fingernails? And, no, I'm not talking professional manicures here. Just whether or not a guy keeps the nails trimmed?

Yes. It is totally gross to see a dude with nails longer than 1/8th of an inch.
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 7:47:58 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Compass:

Originally Posted By Willmar:
For the men reading this thread, just google "does a woman judge a man by his shoes" and see how many hits come up.

I'll throw something else into the mix: FOR THE WOMEN (not the male lurkers), do you notice a man's fingernails? And, no, I'm not talking professional manicures here. Just whether or not a guy keeps the nails trimmed?

Yes. It is totally gross to see a dude with nails longer than 1/8th of an inch.

This. I don't care if they're dirty, but I cannot stand long nails on men.
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 8:20:21 PM EDT
Originally Posted By Willmar:
For the men reading this thread, just google "does a woman judge a man by his shoes" and see how many hits come up.

I'll throw something else into the mix: FOR THE WOMEN (not the male lurkers), do you notice a man's fingernails? And, no, I'm not talking professional manicures here. Just whether or not a guy keeps the nails trimmed?


I have terrible, short, chewed up, hammered nails. I am not one to cast stones
Link Posted: 8/14/2010 8:54:57 PM EDT
I don't purposely look at their nails, but if I happen to notice that they're long.. . As strawberry_snaps said, I don't care if they're dirty.. I do care if they're long, though. Men with long fingernails disgust me.
Link Posted: 8/15/2010 2:36:47 AM EDT
What is this about?

I like a man who dresses and grooms himself appropriately for a given situation.

So working certian jobs I would expect a guy to come home stinking, dirty and wearing jeans/coveralls/workboots.

Office job? Clean, and appropriate for his position


I do notice if what a person has/is wearing is way out of line with their income. Example cashier at retail store driving a new $40k car, if their spouse/so isn't making a significantly higher income that what cashiers around here do then I have to wonder why they are placing that much of their income on a vehicle

Name brand isn't everything

I respect people who spend within their means and I don't mean by going in to debt
Link Posted: 8/15/2010 7:55:06 AM EDT
@RN22lr
-it's about grooming. I had just spent $40 bucks at the shoe repair place to replace the beat to crap heels on my dress shoes. Which led me to wonder if women ever notice shoe condition anyway.

For some reason, probably because I titled the thread badly, everyone thinks the thread is about what kind of shoe you wear.

Since nobody seemed to care about shoe condition I asked about fingernails as I assumed women had to have some baseline for grooming standards.
Link Posted: 8/15/2010 11:29:51 AM EDT

Originally Posted By Willmar:
@RN22lr
-it's about grooming. I had just spent $40 bucks at the shoe repair place to replace the beat to crap heels on my dress shoes. Which led me to wonder if women ever notice shoe condition anyway.

For some reason, probably because I titled the thread badly, everyone thinks the thread is about what kind of shoe you wear.

Since nobody seemed to care about shoe condition I asked about fingernails as I assumed women had to have some baseline for grooming standards.
This makes more sense to me - the way this thread started out I wondered what exactly the point was, but didn't bother with trying to clarify.

Do I notice the appearance of a person, yes, to a degree. Setting matters a lot - but if someone looks trashy, I tend to place them as lazy and try hard to not really associate with them.
I don't make a big paycheck, but I do the best I can to not look like I am poor - I dont have holes in my clothes, they aren't too big or too small(), and I actually brush my hair. For some reason it seems like so many people don't know how to brush their hair...

I have noticed a trend that, generally speaking, people who don't put any attention or concern into their appearance tend to not care about their home, kids, or anything else, and those people I am better off without.

Link Posted: 8/15/2010 12:08:53 PM EDT
Originally Posted By RN22lr:
What is this about?

I like a man who dresses and grooms himself appropriately for a given situation.

So working certian jobs I would expect a guy to come home stinking, dirty and wearing jeans/coveralls/workboots.

Office job? Clean, and appropriate for his position





and it depends on what they are doing at that moment

a guy who comes home from work dirty due to his job is certainly capable of cleaning himself up and wearing whatever fits the situation and it doesnt have to be fancy

my mom gave my brother crap for wearing jeans to my cousin's rehearsal dinner a few weeks ago, on the grounds that he should have dressed better

i thought he looked fine––the jeans were in good repair, he did have on very nice, shined, shoes , his nails were clean, he smelled good, etc

perhaps he was a tad underdressed, but hes a young guy, who doesnt make a lot of money

Link Posted: 8/16/2010 7:44:54 AM EDT
Link Posted: 8/16/2010 7:50:48 AM EDT
Women that care about shoes aren't women I'd care about. So the way I look at it, I'll wear whatever the job calls for that day, and if she does't like my shoes, I've done a good job deterring a woman I wouldn't be compatible with anyway.

I like a redneck woman that can shoot a .45, likes to get dirty, wet, and likes it when I do.

Link Posted: 8/18/2010 5:15:31 PM EDT

Originally Posted By sarahjane:
I definately don't have some weird shoe fetish but I totally check out shoes. If a guy is wearing birks or crocs, I run- if he is wearing sexy boots he is perfect.

Danners?
Link Posted: 8/19/2010 8:13:21 AM EDT
Originally Posted By diabolical_chicken:
Originally Posted By RN22lr:What is this about?

I like a man who dresses and grooms himself appropriately for a given situation.

So working certian jobs I would expect a guy to come home stinking, dirty and wearing jeans/coveralls/workboots.

Office job? Clean, and appropriate for his position


and it depends on what they are doing at that moment

a guy who comes home from work dirty due to his job is certainly capable of cleaning himself up and wearing whatever fits the situation and it doesnt have to be fancy

my mom gave my brother crap for wearing jeans to my cousin's rehearsal dinner a few weeks ago, on the grounds that he should have dressed better

i thought he looked fine––the jeans were in good repair, he did have on very nice, shined, shoes , his nails were clean, he smelled good, etc

perhaps he was a tad underdressed, but hes a young guy, who doesnt make a lot of money


I have tried to think of a way to phrase this but I know someone is going to take offense to my position. That being said I am still going to say that isn't my intent and please ask for clarification if you (the generic, all encompassing you not just Diabolical Chicken) find something offensive.

The issues your sibling and mom have may be complex so I don't care to address your specific situation as it may detract from the overall point I am trying to make

First Issue: Cost
1. Jeans are not cheap. On sale the Levi's I buy my son (wears Mens) are $33. Jeans can be bought for less and for more (over $100) but the Wranglers are about the same price.

2. Khakis can be found for $20-25 at any Walmart
even cheaper online http://www.walmart.com/ip/Wrangler-Men-s-Flat-Front-Pants/5186349
Kohl's has pants for $25-30

3. Khaki's are appropriate for multiple situations and is wouldn't hurt a young man to have 1 pair in their wardrobe

4. Do most young men have a cell phone? Drive a car? Pay for their own stuff? Somewhere amongst all of their expenses $20-30 could be found if it was desired to be found

5. Casual dress pants look fine with a collared shirt, most men own shirts with a collar. So the pants are usually the only additional cost

Second Issue: Attitude
1. If most guys who say they can't buy dress pants won't. Not can't, just won't

2. Entitlement. "this is what I want to wear so I if they want me there then I am going to do what I want"

3. Going to an event that is special for someone else means dressing appropriately to the situation not what we want to wear.
-If I was invited to a themed party of any nature that I wanted to attend I would either decline the invitation if the cost and costumes were out of my comfort zone or wear what I was asked to wear, do people expect to have to tell others the appropriate dress for a given event? Sometimes.

4. Ego- "I am so important that I cannot bend to social graces. My comfort and preference is paramount in all situations I enter." Try holding job interviews for a retail position and see what is seen as appropriate attire for face to face interviews. Fancy is not an issue. Short skirts and plunging cleavage for females, guys and gals who look like they just rolled out of bed, and some who look like they just finished a four day engine overhaul before coming in


Personally, I blame it on liberals telling everyone they deserve to have whatever they want, whenever, regardless of effort. It has seeped into every part of mainstream society and a some not-so-mainstreams portions of society.

[rant/]

Link Posted: 8/19/2010 5:58:07 PM EDT
Nope, too busy checking out their chest/shoulders, eyes, smile....
Link Posted: 8/19/2010 6:23:03 PM EDT
Originally Posted By NimmerMehr:

Originally Posted By sarahjane:
I definately don't have some weird shoe fetish but I totally check out shoes. If a guy is wearing birks or crocs, I run- if he is wearing sexy boots he is perfect.

Danners?


Danners = sexy
Link Posted: 8/19/2010 6:54:12 PM EDT
Full of win.......

Link Posted: 8/20/2010 6:07:01 AM EDT
Originally Posted By MR_JOSHUA:
Full of win.......

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v488/mr_joshua/Oakley/DSCN7709.jpg


nice
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 5:51:16 AM EDT
No. Just his hair and his teeth. If either one's bad, it's a deal-breaker. I have weird hangups.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 10:19:31 AM EDT
Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
No. Just his hair and his teeth. If either one's bad, it's a deal-breaker. I have weird hangups.


Maybe the hair, but I don't see the teeth as a hangup. I mean, no one wants to kiss a snaggletooth and risk losing their lip or something right?
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 2:07:01 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Seiran:
Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
No. Just his hair and his teeth. If either one's bad, it's a deal-breaker. I have weird hangups.


Maybe the hair, but I don't see the teeth as a hangup. I mean, no one wants to kiss a snaggletooth and risk losing their lip or something right?
Maybe 4 years of braces caused me to look at teeth differently, because when I see a mouth that looks like a garbage disposal, all I want to do is rearrange it.

Link Posted: 8/29/2010 2:14:32 PM EDT
Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:

Originally Posted By Seiran:
Originally Posted By GabbasaurusRex:
No. Just his hair and his teeth. If either one's bad, it's a deal-breaker. I have weird hangups.


Maybe the hair, but I don't see the teeth as a hangup. I mean, no one wants to kiss a snaggletooth and risk losing their lip or something right?
Maybe 4 years of braces caused me to look at teeth differently, because when I see a mouth that looks like a garbage disposal, all I want to do is rearrange it.



Definitely not a weird hangup then.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 3:22:41 PM EDT
Originally Posted By strawberry_snaps:
I don't notice shoes. I'm too busy looking at their ass face...


Hey
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 9:56:37 PM EDT
I think of the shoes as either the icing on the cake or the straw that broke the camel's back. I normally won't judge a person by their shoes, but I do notice them.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 10:00:12 PM EDT

Originally Posted By Willmar:
For the men reading this thread, just google "does a woman judge a man by his shoes" and see how many hits come up.

I'll throw something else into the mix: FOR THE WOMEN (not the male lurkers), do you notice a man's fingernails? And, no, I'm not talking professional manicures here. Just whether or not a guy keeps the nails trimmed?

YES... this to me is more important than shoes. Nice shoes can be expensive and I understand if a guy has higher priorities for his money than shoes. It doesn't cost much to trim your nails and clean the dirt out from under them.
Link Posted: 8/29/2010 10:04:02 PM EDT
[Last Edit: 8/29/2010 10:07:47 PM EDT by Frost7]
Originally Posted By imq707s:
If I ever met a girl that judged me by the type/style/color of shoes I had on......I would assume that she was very high maintenance, shallow, and a gold digger.... and walk away.....

A man is much more than his shoes....

Au contraire... clothes make the man. Naked people have very little influence in society.

Seriously though, for me, I'm normally in a pair of running shoes. I use them for their intended purpose till they don't have enough support left for that, but still enough to be nice and comfortable for every day wear; at that point that becomes their new use. Don't get replaced until their condition becomes unacceptable and/or I've worn out another couple of nicer pairs that can replace them and the oldest ones get donated.
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