Posted: 1/7/2010 5:37:08 PM EDT
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I know I don't post much, I mainly lurk. I am new to firearms in general, and have learned a great deal of info here. The other thing I learned about ARFCOM is the compassion of some people here. I have come to a point in my life, where I need prayers.
The day after Thanksgiving, my father went into the hospital, and was diagnosed with lung cancer. Over the next weeks (up until right this second), he has been in and out of the hospital (mostly in, about 5 days total of being home). During that time, he has had the cancer, 2 heart attacks, emergency heart surgery, pneumonia, diabetes, and to top off the list, bloodclots. The doctors havent given us a final time frame yet, they say he could get better, but the chances of that are very slim. 
He is my father. He is my best friend. We were as tight as two friends could ever be. I'm young. 20 years old. He has prepared me for this moment all my life, but when it finally has come to light, I realize nothing could ever prepare me for anything like this. I have so many emotions; sad, depressed, pissed, sorry...the list goes on. He started me on firearms (though never owned his own, he saw my passion for it, and nurtured it). He instilled in me a love for cars; we built one, and are in the process of building another. He taught me to play baseball (still play in college). He taught me right and wrong. But most of all, he taught me to be a good friend, son, father, and lover. And I love him more than anyone else in the world. I don't know what I'm going to do without him  No need to worry, I won't be jumping off a bridge or anything, but I will be crushed. He's relatively young (57). We've had a great life, and I hate to see him in this pain. If he goes, I will understand and won't be mad at him, for it's not his fault. Part of me wants this to happen, to see him be in peace. The other part will feel like it's insides have been ripped out. It's said ashes to ashes, and dust to dust, but it is not that simple.
Please say a prayer, or at the very least, keep him in your thoughts. He, I, and my mother, need all the help that we can get. It'll be rough, and it'll suck, but I'll get through it. I Just needed to vent a little, because I'm a mess right now 
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 Prayers sent.I do hope you Dad pulls through. But, worst case..... if he doesn't make it...... honor him by thinking how he'd want you to react: he'd want you to feel sad, mourn and then move on. He loves you, and wants you to enjoy life and live it to the fullest. Not to dwell on the past or be depressed. In the scheme of things, you'll be in his shoes too before you realize it. Embrace life, and live it to its fullest. That's what parents want. That's what you'll want for your kids. The loss of a parent is very painful, no doubt. When that time eventually comes (sooner or later), the thing that a parent wants to hear is "Dad, I love you. Thanks to you, I'll be OK. I promise."
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Prayers said for your father , you and family. My father passed away 10 years ago December 21st. He had liver cancer that they found just a few days before. I was unable to visit him in the hospital the three days he was there. I was running a temp and they where not certain what was wrong with him. I didn't want to make him worse. He passed away the third evening he was there.I would have given anything to have seen him. Pray for the best and use your time wisely. |
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Quoted:
Prayers sent.I do hope you Dad pulls through. But, worst case..... if he doesn't make it...... honor him by thinking how he'd want you to react: he'd want you to feel sad, mourn and then move on. He loves you, and wants you to enjoy life and live it to the fullest. Not to dwell on the past or be depressed. In the scheme of things, you'll be in his shoes too before you realize it. Embrace life, and live it to its fullest. That's what parents want. That's what you'll want for your kids. The loss of a parent is very painful, no doubt. When that time eventually comes (sooner or later), the thing that a parent wants to hear is "Dad, I love you. Thanks to you, I'll be OK. I promise." Your post brought tears to my eyes (in a good way). Your right, your 100% right. Thanks to all for the thoughts. It means alot to me. |