Posted: 3/25/2009 4:33:43 PM EDT
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Forgive me arfcom, I have sinned against you..
I have let down my arfcom brothers in the worst way I could ever imagine. Today things went horribly wrong for me and I made a bad decision, a really bad decision. My wife took my son to soccer practice and I...I..I made my own sammich!  How could I have let my marriage come to this? My pimp hand, where is it? I really love my wife, but do I have to eject now?
Is this what it feels like to be liberal? I need to stop this shit in it's tracks before I vote for a Kennedy. 
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Please tell me it was at least a bacon sammich. It gets worse... Not only was it not a bacon sammich, I didn't even have any bacon in the house. 
Is it possible to save a marriage this far gone? Quoted:
I hope the sandwich didn't involve Ted Kennedy and Chris Dodd...  Give me some credit here. |
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Please tell me it was at least a bacon sammich. It gets worse... Not only was it not a bacon sammich, I didn't even have any bacon in the house.
Is it possible to save a marriage this far gone? Quoted:
I hope the sandwich didn't involve Ted Kennedy and Chris Dodd... Give me some credit here. Best to just kneel down and hope she is merciful to you. You did do the dishes right? |
We are here for you man. If we are sharing, my wife is a vegetarian. I always have to make my own meat(she is willing just not proficient). Every time I get feeling sad I go hold my long barrel DPMS and picture a crow or squirrel exploding from far off. When it is really bad I just go buy a new gun!
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..... Well, I will have you know that I made my own sammich today... Because I don't even have a girlfriend. I started by cooking 3 pieces of bacon, and sitting them on a paper towel. I then put 2 more pieces in the pan, and while one side was cooking, I placed two pieces of bread in the toaster, and got two slices of cheese from the fridge. As I was turning the bacon over to cook the other side, the toast was complete. I put a piece of cheese on one piece of bread. I then put the original 3 pieces on top of it. I then put the two secondary pieces of bacon atop this, and put cheese on top of them, then the second piece of bread. Two pieces of toasted bread, two slices of cheese, and five pieces of bacon.... I must say.... it was quite good. Not bad, not bad.... It at least looks like you fried it in a pan full of butter... |
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Quoted: We are here for you man. If we are sharing, my wife is a vegetarian. I always have to make my own meat(she is willing just not proficient). Every time I get feeling sad I go hold my long barrel DPMS and picture a crow or squirrel exploding from far off. When it is really bad I just go buy a new gun! ..... Reading your story has been the saddest moment in my life. Married to a vegetarian.... That must be hell on earth. |
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Quoted: White bread? Jesus, you're full of fail tonight.Quoted: Pics or GTFO. http://i455.photobucket.com/albums/qq279/DWesleyB/Wesley016.jpg Sammich in the later stages. |
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White bread? Jesus, you're full of fail tonight.
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Pics or GTFO. http://i455.photobucket.com/albums/qq279/DWesleyB/Wesley016.jpg Sammich in the later stages. What? I'm going to the grocery store to buy the bread I like? HELL NO! I eat what ever happens to be here. I have to draw the line somewhere. 
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Forgive me arfcom, I have sinned against you.. I have let down my arfcom brothers in the worst way I could ever imagine. Today things went horribly wrong for me and I made a bad decision, a really bad decision. My wife took my son to soccer practice and I...I..I made my own sammich! How could I have let my marriage come to this? My pimp hand, where is it? I really love my wife, but do I have to eject now?
Is this what it feels like to be liberal? I need to stop this shit in it's tracks before I vote for a Kennedy.
Good God your man status is in great jeopardy ! You should beat the crap out of the first hippy you see tomorrow , that should help . SW |
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Quoted: If your pimp hand was strong, your woman would buy the bread you like.Quoted: Quoted: White bread? Jesus, you're full of fail tonight.Quoted: Pics or GTFO. http://i455.photobucket.com/albums/qq279/DWesleyB/Wesley016.jpg Sammich in the later stages. What? I'm going to the grocery store to buy the bread I like? HELL NO! I eat what ever happens to be here. I have to draw the line somewhere.  |
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Forgive me arfcom, I have sinned against you.. I have let down my arfcom brothers in the worst way I could ever imagine. Today things went horribly wrong for me and I made a bad decision, a really bad decision. My wife took my son to soccer practice and I...I..I made my own sammich! How could I have let my marriage come to this? My pimp hand, where is it? I really love my wife, but do I have to eject now?
Is this what it feels like to be liberal? I need to stop this shit in it's tracks before I vote for a Kennedy.
Good God your man status is in great jeopardy ! You should beat the crap out of the first hippy you see tomorrow , that should help . SW On it. |
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Quoted: Quoted: Pics or GTFO. http://i455.photobucket.com/albums/qq279/DWesleyB/Wesley016.jpg Sammich in the later stages. After seeing this, you would have been better to GTFO. |
