[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Problem with the girlfriend (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 7/26/2008 9:51:29 PM EDT
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So I am in Japan because of some financial problems living with my parents. My girlfriend of a year just told me the other day that she got drunk at a party and made out with a random person, after telling me that she would not be drinking any more because she doesn't like how it affects her. In the past I have always been there to limit her drinking, but I will not be able to see her again for at least a year. We do not have an open relationship and I wont be able to go back to the same school she is at due to price, and some other personal issues. I feel like she cheated on me and I don't know what to do. Part of me says i should break up with her and just move on, but part of me really doesn't want to and wants to stay with her. What do you think? ETA Poll |
Making out with another dude usually means she is ready to move on, thus you should. Alcohol is great at making truth bubble to the surface. |
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Don't seek relationship advice on a gunboard frequented by moody loners. Standard response you will get is "Eject" Alcohol affects people in different ways. Some say it ampifies what you really are. Mostly it just screws up your judgement. Just because she kissed a guy when trashed doesn't necessarily mean she's ready to move on. Take the totalitary of the circumstances into consideration. But, long distance relationships don't work most of the time, especially among more immature people. No self-control, lack of dedication, etc, leads to poor choices. |
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if they do it once they'll do it again. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and youre just another worm to attract them. If you want to stay with her, be my guest, but I wouldnt want to wonder all the time how many times she has done that. remember, to a girl if she confessed a kiss it was probably sex. |
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I was through a similar situation towards the end of my college years, except we were both still at the same school. I won't go into the details, but if i can part on you any wisdom I have from the incident....warning signs are warning signs are warning signs If she did that, and you have another year to go, you are setting yourself up for A LOT of stress that you do not need. you have 2 options: 1. officially stay together, but get yourself emotionally indifferent (which can be exceedingly difficult if not impossible for some) - this means you go out and talk to/do whatever with whomever in Japan AS LONG AS you really are ok with her doing the same at home. If you will be jealous about what she might be doing, this cannot work. 2. break up, move on. As someone posted above, alcohol is perfect at having the truth bubble to the surface. She's obviously not committed, certainly not over that extreme distance. If you can cut your losses now you are going to save yourself a world of hurt, in my opinion. good luck, and stay sane. -Mike |
| If I was young and not married and sadly stuck in JAPAN for a year, I would nail every woman I could possibly manage. Dude, you are obviously young and she's a whore, go get some hot asian ass and tell her to go make out with or fuck woever she wants, because you are! |
I learned that the hard way. My ex got drunk at a cookout one day. She started blabbering on about her boss's son and how much she thought he was great. A couple weeks later, found out she was getting his cock on a regular basis for some time. |
Hessian-1
It sounds like u are young. You said you will not see her for a year correct? Do not waste a year of your young life in japan waiting for a chick that may break up the week before you get back. Enjoy your time in japan and hook up with as many asian woman as you can. Just think your normal sized american winer is huge in japan!
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