[ARCHIVED THREAD] - Detox/Cleanse (Page 1 of 2)
Posted: 5/8/2008 5:00:20 PM EDT
|
Can anyone reccomend a good internal body cleanse/detox? Do these things really work? TIA ETA: I guess i should have reworded this better, based on some of the replies ive gotten. I have no ''piss test'' to take, i was asking this with concerns to improve overall general health. Thankfully i have not been dumb enough to put myself in the hole in the event that i did have a piss test to take. I just felt that its always good to cleanse the body of EVERYDAY LEGAL toxins we all put in our bodies :) ETA:2 maybe something like THIS (not only colon but liver, intestines and kidney) |
|
Look. Drink a shitload of water. I mean a veritable shitload. Go buy some Vitamin-B supplements, and some cheap creatine. Drink a shitload more water before your piss test. Take the vitamin-B supplement, and the creatine tablet. Run around the block. Piss a lot. Drink a shitload more water. Take another vitamin-B. Drink a shitload more water. This will work better than any detox nonsense. You will still fail your piss test. |
I heard if you eat a bowl of liquid Drano and shredded wheat, it will make your colon clean enough to eat out of. |
A pint of Castor oil with a tablespoon or two of Kerosene will do the same thing. Just don't try to light your farts for a few days. 
|
Castor oil lacks the faint minty freshness of liquid Drano, though. |
 I was just looking for something to help with kidney stones |
| I guess i should have reworded this better, based on some of the replies ive gotten. I have no ''piss test'' to take, i was asking this with concerns to improve overall general health. Thankfully i have not been dumb enough to put myself in the hole in the event that i did have a piss test to take. I just felt that its always good to cleanse the body of EVERYDAY LEGAL toxins we all put in our bodies :) |
Aren't you just helpful today, with your Castor oil and poppy seeds. We're trying real damned hard to give this guy sound, scientifically-backed false hope of passing his piss test, and all you can come up with is 19th century kitchen wizardry? Graham Kerr was last decade. Today is all about Alton Brown. And you can bet that when Alton Brown wants to pass a piss test, he's not mainlining poppy seeds. |
Oh hell, just get some 3in1 oil, gauze pads and ball bearings. It's all ball bearings nowadays. 
|
Well, shit. As long as you got a 'scrip, they'll leave you alone. Hook a brotha up? |
Mea Culpa.
|
Seriously though, I have heard the lemon juice and warm water to cleanse the liver. This comes from my secretary at work who had liver disease and her husband had a rare form of esophogial (no clue how to spell it) cancer. They both started a lot of cleansing habits and a strict diet when they were diagnosed. They both survived, she is 64 and he is 76. |
HAHA, that was good. I wish *wink* |
| Drink at least a gallon of water every day to detox and take Metamucil capsules of fiber to cleanse yourself out. You will take it to the can real quick the first dose man. Working out also helps. I ve been running the last month and doing this and eating salads. Damn I miss meat.....I lost 13 lbs. Down from 248lbs to 235lbs. 40lbs more to go and I should fit into the military's weight bracket. Keep running... |
What kind of toxins? Ethanol? Time. Nicotine? Again, time. Lead? Dimercaperol although this requires a perscription. It also works for arsenic, mercury and other heavy metals. Best in conjuction with disodium EDTA. But these toxins are best avoided. The WORST toxin in oxygen as in cellular metabolism since free radical oxygen/peroxides cause most cancers. Not much you can do about that. |
|
I dated a chick once who would do these "clense" things. For like a wekk, she'd drink nothing but fruit/veg natural juice... I mean ALL NATURAL, like the stuff you juice yourself or get from the health food market, she'd lose weight too. It's supposed to be some celeb diet now. |
Yeah, I heard about that. You drink nothing but natural juice, and you stick leeches to your asshole. Then you snort pure, uncut cocaine off of another person's body. |
Yup. It's medically and scientifically bullshit. You don't have a bunch of deadly toxins floating around in your body, abnormally anyway. And, nothing you're going to buy or do to yourself will flush these voodoo chemicals from your body. Ask any company or advocate of these cleansers to define the toxin, and there's where the comedy begins. |
|
This is what you do to become completely clean (you won't do it because being completely clean is not fun)... take 3 days off work. Each day drink 1 bottle of sodium biphosphate. For that 72 hour period you are only allowed to eat and drink clear things, apple juice, water, jello, etc. Nothing solid like burgers and fries, nothing cloudy like OJ or cranberry juice. On day 3 you will drink a glass of water, and 10 min. later pee it out of your butt. The cleanliness of the excriment will rival that of a PUR water filter. The first day is the worst. I had to do this for surgery once. |
Oh, bullshit. I just bought these pads off the TV the other day that promise to take arsenic out of the bottom of my feet. And you say cleansing is hokum! |
The ONLY thing those pads clean is your wallet. |
But they don't go on my wallet. They go on my feet! |
