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The man can spell "lingerie" but not explain "Douged" |
There was a guy who posted on here about a situation he was in when he was 16-17 if I remember right. Anyways he was doing community service at a VFW or something similar with a girl who was a little on the fat side. Anyways they ended up going at it on a table but he didnt realize there was going to be a wedding or a meeting or something like that and 100 or so people walked in on them. It was a small town so they apparently coined the term Douged to describe what he did and used it quite often. |
Think I might know who it was that did that.
And thank you for bringing that back up. I really like to think about it at Christmas time and all. |
Was that you...? I tried a couple of weeks ago to find that story, and nobody would claim the fame. Tell it again...!!! |
It was me.
When I was 16, I was sentenced to probation for, well, that really isnt important here. Anyway, I had to serve community service at the local Civic center. The center was used for things like weddings "& receptions, family reunions. Shit like that. There was this chick serving her community service there as well; named Mary. Mary wasnt what you'd call a "prize" by any stretch of anyones imagination. She was big, real big; and not pretty. At school, folks called her "Queen Mary", refering to the famed British cruise ship. We kinda got to be friends working together. She wasnt a bad person; actually quite funny, and capable of holding a converasation. Anyway, this one evening I was to show up and set the center up for a wedding reception. Unfold tables and chairs, put out trash cans, etc. Mary was to do the same. While we were folding out tables and chairs, we were talking. The conversation turned to sex and, as well as I remember, who we'd like to have sex with in our school. Thats when Mary offered to give me a BJ. Who was I to turn her down? She started on me right there in the area we had set up for the reception. Then she started asking me to fuck her. By this time there was no way for me to say no. I simply couldnt; my body would not allow me to walk off. So we went at it, right on a table in the reception hall. We went at it for about 2 or 3 minutes and then all hell broke loose.
What happened over the next few minutes will forever be engraved in my memory as the worst moment in my life. I didnt hear anyone pull up, nor did I hear anyone approach the front doors. But sure as hell, floks just started pouring into the Civic Center. Now, I grew up in a small town, everyone knows everyone else. It seemed that half the God Damn town poured into that Center in a matter of a minute. And here I am with my pants off , balls deep in "Queen Mary". Mary is laying on the table, legs spread eagle, in her birthday suit. My high school gym coach was there. My holy roller aunt was there. My Mom's best friend was there with her daughter; who was one of the most beautifull & popular girls in school, God did I have a crush on her. Now she was watching me pull my junk out of this hog and trying to put my fucking pants back on. The asshole Center Coordinator started screaming "Doug, what the hell do you think you're doing?". Then he went on and on about how that was supposed to be the table the cake was going on. It was horrible. Mary was crying, I was at a loss for words. I was just trying to put my pants on to cover my flacid penis.
The next Monday at school folks started calling me "El Capitain of HMS Queen Mary". Thats when the phrase "Douged" was coined. If you got caught screwing a big girl, or an ugly girl, it was said that you "pulled a Doug", or you "Douged a fat chick" or you "Douged out".
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